Ren

Her reunion with her mom was much harder than Ren thought it would be. Their first meeting, shortly after the battle for the estate had ended, was a mix of joy and torment. They were very happy to see each other safe, but Ren’s impending hunt for Kojiro soured the mood pretty quickly. While, at that point, Ren felt absolutely nothing about the perspective of confronting her brother, her mom was painfully aware both of what her son did, but also that it basically meant her children would be going to war against each other AND that she would have to choose one of them and still possibly lose both. Ren could clearly see that Ireela wanted to ask that they spare Kojiro and that it was taking every fibre of her being to suppress that.

Gods damn you, Kojiro.

Her mom’s attempts to mask her relief upon learning about the mission’s failure would almost be comical if not for the grimness of the situation, though her other friends having pretty much the same reaction definitely softened the sting of their failure. Even Lilyth, who had the biggest axe to grind against him, seemed immensely happy that their mission ended without any combat.

Then again, the idea we could die, or worse, was probably weighing heavily upon her.

Ren wasn’t quite sure what to think of her own involvement in what happened to Lilyth. She didn’t quite buy it that the slimeling didn’t blame her for what happened to her. It was her idea to come here, wasn’t it? If she shut down Caei…

Oh right. She would have to blame Caei then too? And Aki for sending her to Mer-Cas? And the girl… Fuck me.

Ren could see clearly as day that Aki was deeply infatuated with Lilyth, so she couldn’t even begin to imagine what the poor girl must have felt since they learned of her wife's capture.

Why, brother? Why? Why did you have to do this?

One positive that came out of that was that all the conflict Ren felt about cutting off all ties with her father’s side of the family was now over. Experiencing the pain and anguish their victims felt first-hand would do that.

What kind of a monster am I? The Yamaokas pride themselves on having “some” standards. Like, we are the lesser evil as there are lines we won't cross… that's very small comfort to people we deem acceptable targets. “We may have assassinated your kid, but look at the bright side - our brothel workers are there out of their free will”. I mean that does make us a “lesser” evil, but the bar for that is so low you would need the blessing of R’as-T'uar to dig it out.

She felt physically sick whenever she thought about the number of lives she potentially destroyed.

The usual bullshit we told ourselves was that we were providing others with services they needed anyway, so why let the others profit from them when it could have been us? It should have been nobody. When I gave the girls the poison example… I neglected to mention that it was me who arranged that. I never thought about who it would be used on. They were buying and I was selling.

‘I can see I have done you a great disservice, Rennie,’ she suddenly heard her mother say, great pain present in her voice.

She was still sitting in the dining room, her face hidden in her hands. Ireela had left with the rest to show them around, and Ren did not notice that her mother was back.

‘It’s not like I didn’t go willingly into the “family business”,’ she sighed back.

‘Maybe that is true, but I don’t think you fully understood the ramifications.’

Ireela moved a chair next to her and sat down. Ren, completely spent, simply hugged her mom and wept for a moment, while Ireela wrapped her hands around her.

‘There… there… I would say it’s over, but I would be lying, wouldn't I?’

Ren simply nodded.

‘When…’ her mother continued and stopped immediately.

After a heavy sigh, she continued:

‘ When… you went into the family business, I thought you would be safe thanks to that. That… by putting you in Tyr-Mel, was father was doing you a favour as you wouldn't be in as much of a spotlight… I should have protested.’

‘Here I am now, Mom,’ Ren said gently. ‘I am out now and never going back.’

Ireela hugged her tighter.

‘Thank the gods… when Kojiro told me that you were assassinated… I thought my heart would break. That's how he got in you know…By bringing the news about you… Seeing you here now… I am glad that it was a lie.’

Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

‘It wasn't,’ Ren said, sad she would need to break her mother's heart even more. ‘Not completely. I almost died in that tavern. If it wasn't for my friends…’

Her mom tensed.

‘H-how…’ she stammered out.

‘A crossbow bolt into my stomach.’

Ireela moved her hand onto it and felt around.

‘But you are fine. There is nothing there…’

‘Savri knows healing magic. She couldn't save Ulrech though.’

‘Oh no… That poor man…’

Ren pointed to the sword on her hip.

‘That’s his. I think his family should get it.’

‘I’ll arrange that,’ her mom nodded. ‘Along with some stipend for them. The family always takes care of their own.’

‘About that… It’s not just the family business I am leaving. It’s the family. I am just Ren now.’

Her mom took in a deep breath and then nodded.

‘No, Rennie,’ she exhaled. ‘Not ‘just Ren’. There is a second family you are a part of by blood. You may no longer view yourself as Ren Yamaoka, but I hope that doesn't mean you won't consider being Ren of the Bloody Perch clan.’

‘I’d like that, yes.’

Ren visited the clan stronghold a few times and always enjoyed her time there. They were good people, for the most part. Much better than her old family.’

‘What about you?’ she asked. ‘What about dad?’

‘Your father and I… haven’t been on best of terms for a long time. Whenever he had to choose between the family business, or me… The former won. Every single time. I still love him… which is why I haven’t left yet… but now that I have to choose between you and him… I choose you.’

Ren hugged her mom tighter.

‘Thank you.’

‘You are all that I have left, Rennie. I have failed you once. I will not do so again.’

Savri came back a few moments later. She dropped into one of the chairs and let out a heavy sigh.

‘How are they?’ Ren’s mom asked.

‘I left them in the library on the couch. They are trying to… I don’t know… be together, I guess. Probably the best thing they can do for themselves right now. I’ve seen cases like Aki's before. Ideally, she should see a professional, but since they don’t exist on Dwynveia the next best thing would be a few weeks of rest. Lilyth… fucking hell… there is a lot of damage there. Some of it hasn’t set in yet. I can’t even speculate…’

She hid her face inside her hands.

‘Give me a moment,’ Sav said. ‘I still need to do a check-up on your mom.’

‘Don’t worry,’ Ireela said. ‘They were gentle on me. Probably the last kindness Kojiro offered me.’

‘Oh… okay. Just let me know if you need help. I still have enough mana to heal most wounds.’

‘Thank you, but I’m fine.’

‘Very well.’

Savri lifted her head and Ren saw smeared blood on her cheek.

‘Forgot about that,’ the medic sighed and put two fingers on her cheek.

There was a flash of green light and the cut disappeared.

‘Be right back,’ she sighed and went to wash up.

When she was back, Ireela asked a question that was bugging her.

‘Excuse me, but are you THAT Savri?’

‘The one and only,’ the demoness chuckled.

‘Rennie told me that you were the one who healed her after she... Thank you.’

‘You have no idea how happy I am that I was able to help SOMEONE these past few days.’

‘I can imagine… being a healer must be a difficult calling.’

‘It is… The worst cases are the ones where you have to choose. Those… decisions haunt you at night the most. Holding someone’s hand so they don’t die alone, helping victims of atrocities… Those always cost you a piece of your soul. Especially if it's someone you know… There was this guy in my squad called Frank Ville. He was a real asshole, we would always rib him for it, and, I am ashamed to admit it, but I used to fantasise about throwing him from the air… overboard. Then the Perimedes mission came. Poor Frank got ripped in half by… I guess this doesn't matter. I was with him to the end. Held him. Assured him it would be fine. All the while feeling horrible about how we treated him. What I wanted to do to him. He was an asshole. But he didn't deserve that.’

Ren and Ireela covered their mouths in horror.

‘H-how do you handle this?’ she asked. ‘I mean… I… wouldn't… I can't…’

Savri let out a humourless laugh.

‘Believe me… when the situation calls for it… you can. Never doubt that. And you do it for those you can save. A life you managed to save, outweighs those you couldn't.’

They sat there for a moment in heavy silence. Ren’s mom finally broke it.

‘I’ve also been thinking… and decided that this house also now belongs to you and your friends, Savri. As I understand you all need a place to stay, and this doesn't even begin to cover my debt of gratitude to ’

Ren was shocked by the offer. She was all for it, but…

‘Won’t Dad mind?’ she asked.

‘I have no intention of asking him for permission.