puff the magic dragon……. Godfrey immediately started throwing a string of the most horrific swear words at me and Alfred started laughing. Godfrey even did the magical equivalent of a continual Taser at me yelling what the fuck is wrong whit you. Luckily for me the fridge exploded and a cat sized black and white scaled classical European dragon ran at me and jumped on my chest clawing me pretty badly although the tazing did stop at least. Uhh my little puff are you a cute little boy dragon, yes you are, yes you are, puff purred at me in a deep cat like voice, I could only squealing like a teenage girl although I was abruptly stopped by puff breathing his icy breath at me and drawing a shit load of energy from me, what the hell was that Godfrey I said.

Well kid it appears that you just became the proud mother of a female dragon kid. she just fucking imprinted on you. You glorious son of a bitch he answered. Only too be followed quickly by Alfred saying wait what a dragon cant imprint on a human only a dragon. well he’s part phoenix which would do it Alfred Godfrey stated. Part phoenix? You get more and more interesting every day my lord.

Ok a mother to an apparently, girl dragon I guess I can deal with that don’t we need to feed him or what?

Of course, we do lord Nathan I will get right on that he says while he starts nearly filling half the cave whit gold and activating the runes on the cave making it quickly drop too freezing temperatures and snow and ice quickly appearing on the floor. Godfrey saved me from the cold by activating my wards. Puff quickly squalled again and started diving around in the gold.

Ok exactly how cold is it in here? And what’s up with all that gold how the hell did you get that? I say.

Well it’s close to the temperatures of Antarctica so I don’t recommend going down here whiteout Godfrey. And all the gold, well after the various military’s paying all that money for the knights stuff me and Godfrey might have made a lot of enchanted weapons to sell to them. They even came buy with a few truckloads of guns for us too enchant. But we are outcompeted now after the rest of the community figured it out, we just had a starting advantage the prices have fallen a lot now. Alfred says although I still recommend getting a lot more gold, dragons are pretty addicted to the stuff they tend to kill of all the dwarfs in a settlement too build their lair in.

Well that’s pretty awesome I say being rich and all, the hobbit reference is awesome too.

It’s not a hobbit reference he’s being completely literal in fact he’s kind of downsizing it, a dragons power and size are directly affected by how much time they spend in their natural elemental environment and how big their treasure is. Firedragons are actually among the weaker ones it’s kind of hard to find an environment with extreme heat and room for treasure although the ones that do are pretty fucking scary. You might want to bathe puff in fire from time to time still don’t like that name you fucking idiot by the way, it will make her like you more despite being a frost dragon since the whole her knowing you are a phoenix and as such recognizing you as her adoptive parent.

Sure thing, get shitloads of money and bathe her in fire. Which I do only for her too squeal and jump on me conveniently my wards save me this time. Then she breathes frost at me squeals a bit more then digs herself under the gold.

Em guys what is she doing?

She’s hibernating dragons do that. How don’t you know that, do you really think there would be any life in any realm whit dragons in them if they didn’t, so you only need to visit and throw fire at her every few days says Godfrey.

Well that’s disappointing I thought I would get too take her on walks and pet her I say.

Well I guess you could take her on walks while she is still relatively small although that won’t last long they grow pretty fast in the beginning becoming the size of a car in her case with the environment she’s living in, then the growth stagnates and then she will grow very slowly for the rest of her life unless you get a lot more gold. It’s a defence mechanism most dragons throw out their kids when they can fly hence their low numbers, despite them being pretty much ageless like you. Although she won’t find it weird that you don’t since you are phoenix related most younger dragons will consider you pretty much a deity since you are a lord of an element. you will even become more pure-blooded whit age becoming about a half blood an gaining a truly impressive affinity for life and fire although that will take around 3 hundred years, nothing too get your panties In a twitch over Godfrey says. Meanwhile Alfred has left to do butler stuff.

Ok the whole halfblooded phoenix deity is at least something to look forward too. But a car sized baby is fucking awesome. I say while I leave puff too sleep.

I relax for a few weeks visiting puff 2 times a week and bathing her in fire too her great delight and taking her on walks and petting her. although she’s kind of stopped purring now hawing become the size of a cow so now it’s more of a roar still cute though at least in my eyes although probably more terrifying too most people. Especially the dwarfs and fey she recently froze and then ate turns out the dwarfs made a tunnel in when building it probably thinking I was going to store precious artefacts in there or something, I guess they were right after all my precious is down there, totally not a Gollum reference. The whole relaxation was for the whole natural disaster and people disappearing that might have been somewhat my fault I did have accomplishes.

Okay Godfrey shouldn’t we get started on the whole joining an enclave thing seems pretty important I say.

It’s kind of up to you. You only really need to do it if you want too, maybe too get some more gold from mercenary work. You are growing pretty strong your defences are pretty good at this point although you are kind of lacking yourself you need to practice a lot more to get stronger demons and better at your elemental manipulation you learning some high end physical shields are pretty up there on the important list, I can only make smaller ones.

I guess I can see your point on personal power but I would find it pretty fucking boring, holing up in here I don’t have a girlfriend much less any man’s dream a harem yet. Also, I need a much bigger social circle, not that you and the demons aren’t entertaining. Also, I have far from enough enemies unless I truly piss of some people they aren’t going to come knocking at the door and the great defences are not going to get people too throw themselves at them too their death and souls sucking. Despite the whole dragon and my still somewhat existing morals, I’m not that keen on mass slaughter off the innocent even if it would please puff. also, its going too be incredible boring if they don’t fight back so I’m going to have too deal whit politics I guess.

Well you are pretty much on your own with the whole politicks think, I know nothing about that kid says Godfrey.

Of course, you don’t I say that would be way too convenient fuck my life. So, of to meet the Nathaniel guy. I get the information about the whole magic registration stuff from Alfred thank god, I have a magic butler.

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Then I get dressed to get out of the house, I guess sweat pants is not going to help with getting a girlfriend. Then I call Ibrahim and get going. 20 minutes of banter with Godfrey and Ibrahim later I arrive at a court house looking building whit a heavily armed mixture of magical beings and a shitload of wards although they are all under magic guises. I get out of the car and walk up to the front door getting stopped by an elf whit an assault rifle. So, what’s the purpose of your visit sir? Well I’m here too register with the dark enclave mister elf, what’s up whit the assault rifle I thought you used bows I say. Well sir different times calls for different measures, follow me sir.

So I do making my way through the halls passing by all kinds of creatures and a lot of humans with varying auras. We get too an office with a gnome secretary in front. The guards informs the gnome that a Nathan smith is here too register with the dark enclave. the gnome says that I can walk in registrations for the dark enclave being highly rare. So I walk in the office se the Nathaniel guy behind a desk, all the walls a covered in books I take a glance and notice that they are all about magic, I take a seat in front of his desk and pull out cigarette light it up and start puffing on it. Nathaniel looks up at me smiles and says well hello Nathan I wasn’t really expecting you, evil fortress and everything I’m Nathaniel I don’t believe we have met. Well I have seen you on TV, so how do we do this registration deal I say. Well mister Nathan I hoped we could have a conversation before that, taking some fancy dark rum from a drawer in his desk, totally pirate like much cool I think, he pours a drink for us making my glass fly over too me to take. Sure, Nathaniel I’m not really that polite at my house so I guess we can talk I say.

Nathaniel laughs and says I wouldn’t really call your dwarven made fortress that you diverted major ley lines too, killing of thousands of people too do a house. you really know how to make my job hard Nathan.

I have no idea about any ley line diverting mister Nathaniel, but theoretically how would you know such things?

Not really much of a stretch since the theoretical diverting as you said, was too over the fortress of a warlock. How would you have theoretically done such a think I’m pretty sure it breaks quite a few laws of magic and if you look around you might realise that I’m quite learned on such things mister Nathan.

Well Nathaniel theoretically I might possess a grimoire and the merger might have made such a thing a think easier, also theoretically it might have required an extremely complex piece of ritual magic that might have involved a lot of sacrifices.

Nathaniel laughs well a grimoire, the whole you not denying being a warlock kind of explains you blatant lack of morals lord Nathan are you even aware how rare a grimoire especially one of that power is?

Blatant lack of morals I wouldn’t say it’s that all about perspective, and no I am not aware of how rare grimoires were. I didn’t really think about it when I got the second one. And lord Nathan?

Wow you have 2 grimoires that’s incredible how did you manage that you must be blessed by some dark god or something he says astonished. And too explain the rarity of a grimoire, there’s probably less than 50 on this planet only about 10 or so being of yours level, half of them are holy since all of them was provided by the Althosian god of mana Enamor. And having a grimoire of that level makes you entitled to the lord title. Lord Nathen

Well I guess I have heard the lord entitlement stuff before but thought it was only among demons. But the god thing is good to know I guess. And Theoretically speaking a group of inquisitors might have attacked me one of them carrying it and all of them ending up dead I say.

Well that explains it perhaps not that lucky after all. an inexperienced, unaffiliated, warlock, with a greater warlock grimoire is highly likely to be attacked by the inquisition they probably underestimated you do too your experience. they would probably have brought an army too take you out, since they would love to lock up a warlock grimoire in a pit somewhere you must be highly gifted too survive such a thing he says. Do you still have the holy grimoire I would pay you quite handsomely for one despite not doing me much good, just too study one.

Then annoyingly Godfrey decided to join the conversation enlarging himself too be large enough too not look like a weird necklace. The kids not talented he just has an awesome grimoire and no of course he dident keep the grimoire, I’m awesome so why would he keep a shitty useless holy one, also dragons are much cooler.

Again, he returns to the astonished tone you have a fucking sentient grimoire I have never heard of such a thing, it explains your quite unrealistic rise in power, I thought you made a deal whit a demon lord or something along those lines, most warlocks that survive a while go down that road. And I guess a dragon is pretty irresistible to a teenage warlock, although I believe I could have given you considerably more for it he states.

I answer of course I don’t have a dragon that’s ridiculous you are very funny Godfrey. And I did get my leprechaun too sell it so I don’t believe you would have provided more I answered.

Well of course you wouldn’t have a dragon that would be highly illegal whit out an enclave affiliation and would probably piss of a huge amount of people even with one. Theoretically you might want to keep it under lock and keep, for a long time unless you are interested in temporally renting it out to the enclave or the military. You are truly correct on the leprechaun matter I don’t really have a chance to compete with one of those lord Nathan. He says laughing.

Well I did mostly come for mercenary jobs or whatever being stuck in an evil castle is kind of boring I say.

Mercenary work you say I believe I can get a man of your skillset such jobs he says, moving on we might want to move on I have a council meting shortly. Sure, think he provides me with a contract to sign I read it like any proper warlock. Wait what it’s not magically binding? It probably should be but the government doesn’t require it and we are certainly not going to inform them he says.

I laugh signing it well that clears up a lot of my concerns about this whole thing might have even dropped it if I didn’t like the contract I reply.

That’s one of the other things that makes the non-magical contracts practical I would have a truly hard time recruiting anyone for the dark enclave our kind are pretty cellos about contracts, probably a professional hazard, He says while pouring another drink for us. Now you are officially a part of the oxford enclave, sadly one of the only 3 people that any of us would find interesting and the only warlock among those, although there’s also a lot of lesser warlock, dark wizards like myself, a few dark witch covens, some necromancer’s like the third member of the evil trio Azazael, and the assorted scrapple. All of which you would probably find too be pests.

What’s even the difference between a dark wizard a warlock and a necromancer I’m not really that sure about grave diggers I say.

Would you listen when I talk to you wizards use arcane and reality magic and mostly only spell craft. The dark wizard represents a lack of morals and use of summoning and darker type spells. Warlocks use a mixture of various arts mostly summoning although there, true defining feature is an affinity for corruption kid, also necromancers are awesome and they don’t dig up corpses, they dig up themselves if they have any idea what they are doing. Demons the undead not really that different, not that warlocks and necromancers don’t regularly go to war, mostly for infringing on hunting grounds Godfrey says.

You should listen to your teacher young padawan Nathaniel states

Godfrey grumbles would people stop comparing me too a gobbling with a glow stick.

Nathaniel and me just laugh it off.

So, lord Nathan could you do me a favour and go to the council meeting with me, Azazael isn’t exactly social, spending most of his time in the crypts full of skeletons under the city. Showing of a lord warlock could do true wonders for my political powers.

Well as long as I’m allowed to smoke, drink and you don’t divulge theoretical knowledge on me committing genocide and having a dragon called puff and stuff. Also, I require at least one sexy magical teenage looking girl too try to go on a date with. I say

Nathaniel laughs and says puff? I wouldn’t mention such things anyways not your mass slaughters are not really good for my political image. And there is a quite stunning teenage looking magical woman there, I will even try to be your wingman.

Don’t badmouth my dragon its awesome even if people disagree with my naming sense I find any such talk highly offensive Nathaniel. but sure, pretty lady ready to go.

I will be careful too not offend your very awesome dragon again lord Nathan in a highly serious tone. Only too immediately say let’s go robin.

I’m not your bloody sidekick Nathaniel.

If you say so lord Nathan just keep believing.

He says as we walk out the door.