Somewhere inside a small room, a young man’s eyes blinked up at a familiar ceiling.
“…”
The first thing he did after he woke up every single day was looking at it, so he no longer had anything to say about the view. Neither its color nor its appearance was anything special to take note of in the first place, let alone repeatedly all the time.
However, despite it being the most uninteresting thing he would see for the whole day, he would still take a few minutes just staring blankly into the clean, slightly yellowed surface, thinking about nothing in particular.
That was how he did it, every single morning, and it always marked the beginning of his schedule. Perhaps it served as a placeholder for all the tasks he was supposed to do for the day, a neat and simple way to kick things off, but even he was not sure why he chose to do it in the first place.
“Mm…”
However, now that he had finished looking at the ceiling, the groaning promptly began afterwards. He rolled over in his bed, grabbing and holding onto his hard pillow as though he feared it would leave his side and never return.
I don’t want to get out of bed…
He knew what he was supposed to do down to the very last letter, including the important event that was supposed to happen today, but even with the looming daily responsibilities that he needed to carry out and his excitement, he could not muster the strength he needed to start them off.
“Mmgh… unhgh…”
“Sounds like you’ve had a good dream.”
“Urk?!”
At the sound of her voice, he quickly got up and, with a panicked expression, turned towards the female who had entered the room, putting all his attention on her. A white towel was hanging delicately on her arm as she smiled at his response.
“Sorry, Sister Renare!” he responded in a slightly flustered tone, “I’ll get out of bed now! Please excuse my laziness!”
Much like a nun, the girl who he called Renare was dressed in a full habit with the exception of a coif on her head. The outfit consisted of an all-white tunic with long and baggy sleeves and a length that reached down to the floor, hiding her feet away.
In the left breast part of her tunic was an insignia of two hands clasped together in a praying pose, with a shining halo above them. It had been stitched onto the outfit with yellow string, making the entire design appear more prominent and glowing, almost as though it was made of gold.
Her purple hair was tied up in a crown braided bun, giving her the appearance of a regal lady or, if he was being very generous, a kindly mother. Despite her ominously blank face, her intention to check on him in his room every single day had made that point even more convincing for him.
“Don’t worry about it, Brother Simon,” she replied to his panicked response as she slowly tugged on her towel, “it’s still early, and our daily schedule doesn’t start until 8am, remember? Just relax.”
“… right. My bad.”
“There’s no need to apologize either.”
“Sorry.”
“I swear.”
Shaking her head at Simon’s silliness, she walked over to his bed before sitting down on the mattress. She then placed her hand on the two long lumps protruding from the bedsheets where his legs were, before gently brushing them as though she was petting a cat.
“Urk…”
The sudden action disturbed Simon, who quickly moved his legs and subsequently his entire body to the side, causing him to sit up by the edge of the bed next to, but slightly away from her.
“Oh. What’s the matter?”
“Don’t,” he bluntly replied to her curious question, “… don’t do that. It’s weird. We’re not even that close to begin with.”
“Come on, Brother Simon.”
Renare continued to reach out to him with her best attempt at a reassuring voice as she slowly shifted closer to him again, causing him to involuntarily flinch and look away from her in response.
“You know me well enough. I’m your big sister. I’m five years your senior. You can tell me what’s troubling you.”
“… for starters, you’re making me uncomfortable.”
“Oh, sorry, I forgot.”
Realizing that she had overstepped her bounds, she quickly backed off from him, allowing him to relax again before softly apologizing.
“It’s no big deal. Just, remember next time,” he hastily added to not upset her feelings, and she nodded in acknowledgment.
“Hm… then shall we talk about something else instead? We still have time before the daily prayer.”
“Let’s see…”
As he offhandedly glanced back towards his bed, he remembered the first thing she had said to him earlier when he had woken up.
“Do you want to hear about the dream I had last night? If I recall, you like them, don’t you?”
“Well, I mainly like to find out what other people dream about,” she kindly corrected him, “but yeah, you can tell me about it.”
“Okay.”
With a quick clearing of his throat, and a quick adjustment of his sitting position, Simon began to recount the sequence of fuzzy visions he had seen over the previous night to her in as much detail as he could remember.
“…”
“I see. So, it’s the same one you’ve been having over the past few nights where you’re a monster, but instead of the desert, it’s underwater?” she promptly asked as soon as he finished his recollection.
“Yup.”
“I wonder…”
Closing her eyes, she lowered her head and was quiet for a short moment before she spoke again.
“I’m not an expert on dreams, and I’m not sure about everything I know, but I heard that if someone dreams about struggling in the water, that usually means they are dealing with a lot of conflicting emotions all at once, which overwhelm them and make them have trouble breathing.”
“Hm, I don’t know about that,” Simon quickly disagreed with her point, “I thought I was fine when I went into the water. I didn’t feel like I was struggling, and if I was, then it wouldn’t be such a nice dream.”
“Oh. Either way, I believe that it still has something to do with emotions, if I’m not mistaken. It was something about accepting them, I think. I’m not sure, I might have to do more research in the library, and maybe then I’ll confirm what it means.”
“Ah, it’s ok,” he nonchalantly waved it off and replied, “I don’t think my dreams are that important anyway. What’s more important is what we are doing today.”
“Hm? Ah, right. It’s happening today.”
“The one that we’ve been waiting for over a year, the one and only we’ve been preparing for…”
Now that their conversations about personal dreams had stimulated both their brains a little, the both of them, especially Simon, felt less tired and more prepared for the day, and as soon as he reminded himself on what was happening, the anticipation slowly returned to him.
“Well then, shall we?” Renare asked as she got up from his bed, and he followed suit shortly afterwards with a confident look on his face before walking to the back of the room and changing into an outfit similar to hers.
“Mm, let’s do it!”
**********************
As one could probably predict from their similar outfits and schedule, both Simon and Renare were members of a collective society, one that championed a strict etiquette, order and program for each and every single day, as their leaders continually drove and pushed them all to follow it without question.
That fact meant that, despite all the excitement in the air before the big event that was scheduled to be happening at night, the both of them, along with all the other members from the same society, had to complete all their daily tasks first before they could get properly hyped for it.
8:00 am: Daily Prayer
The first task, which always took place in the main square at 8am on the dot, was a simple one, yet it was one of the most important ones that everyone had to do, as they were carefully taught.
Before the clock struck 8, the leaders of the society would first lay down several mats, which when combined were large enough for everyone to kneel on. Once all of them were ready, they would subsequently bow down before a large statue and pray devoutly to it.
“We beg of you, our goddess, please give us enlightenment in these difficult times. We believe in you and your Gift, and we will not change our beliefs…”
The statue was carved from the finest marble, and it simply consisted of a female figure, the ‘goddess’, majestically standing upright with her arms extended widely out in a warm gesture.
She was dressed in a toga-like outfit, similar to the habits all the members of the society wore, although it was clearly designed to be much fancier and more royal than theirs for a good reason.
A pair of highly detailed wings grew out of her back which, when combined with the halo suspended over her head by a thin support piece and her beautiful facial features, gave her an altogether otherworldly appearance that would turn every head around her.
While they kneeled in front of the statue, they would pray for two whole hours, with one hour dedicated solely to praising their goddess, and another hour focused on other matters, including their society as a whole and how it had to flourish for decades to come for the good of the world.
No matter what, one important thing about the daily prayer that everyone had to learn was that no one could be excused from it. Every single member had to attend it, no matter what their circumstances were, and the rules of the society made it very clear.
10:00 am: Training/Clean-up
Following the compulsory prayer, the followers would be split into two groups, with the first group being assigned to clean up the premises, while the other group underwent physical training.
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Both tasks were not easy, as the society’s compound was massive, spanning the size of more than ten sports stadiums, while the training usually consisted of intense exercises that focused on building up focus and determination, including but not limited to balancing rocks on one’s head, holding specific poses for a certain amount of time, and running around the entire length of the compound.
Such training and cleaning went on until lunchtime, and by the time the leaders wrapped it up, everyone was already exhausted and hungry, willing to call it a day, but thankfully, the next tasks were more relaxing for them.
12:30 pm: Lunch
Lunch was a standard affair, and nothing particularly stood out about the meals that the followers were served.
Due to the rationing of already scarce resources, everyone, including the leaders, normally ate a small bowl of rice with a tiny smattering of vegetables and fish. It was barely enough for a full meal, but they had to make do with what they had.
However, on this day, all of them were treated to a surprisingly extravagant meal, being served actual meat obtained from caught beasts and topped off with a nice-tasting jelly for dessert. From the looks of it, the leaders were already sparing no expense for the event before it even started.
1:30 pm: Free time/Self-study
The next activity after lunch was a long break, to seemingly compensate for the grueling physical torture that the followers had undergone a few hours prior.
During this period, they would normally break out into small groups and conduct personal self-study sessions, with most of them opting to visit the society’s library, which was located near the western end of the compound.
The old brick building was packed full of books containing information that had been recorded both before and after the end and painstakingly gathered over the years, allowing for perusal and rich learning.
“What have you got there?”
“’A Complete History of the Last War’. It gives some good insights into the battles that were fought before the end.”
“Very nice.”
“We swap in 15 minutes?”
“Yup.”
For Simon and Renare, they often took this time to swap books with each other at set intervals in order for them to catch up to the other in terms of progress. That way, it allowed for the both of them to read and learn together without either of them getting too left behind.
5:00 pm: The Elder’s Address
“Today, we shall not delay our preparations! Today, we shall take the next step forward in the advancement of our prestigious society, and into the challenging world that awaits us ahead!”
Before dinner commenced, the entire society who gathered in the Great Hall would hear the Elder give his daily address, which were normally filled with promises of hope, freedom, and strength for them alongside other vague, yet confident proclamations.
Although there was a public address system in place throughout the entire compound, it was rarely, if not ever, used by anyone, forcing everyone in the society to be present and to listen to the addresses in person.
“I, the Elder, shall be your eternal guide, bringing the Church of Enlightenment to the promised future!”
As he gave his speech, the self-proclaimed Elder, the man who led them, would normally stroke his long brown beard as he faced all of his followers sitting before him with an assertive smile.
Despite not being one of the oldest or most experienced among them, he was a naturally charismatic individual and had a way with words, having risen to the top of the society in the fastest time ever taken for a single follower. As such, very few complained about his policies, his speeches, or his status as their leader.
“The will of the goddess has been passed on to me, and I shall pass them onto you, believers of the faith! Always remember to believe in faith!”
“Believe in faith!” the followers, like a machine, repeated after him.
“Mmmh…”
As soon as the address had started, Simon had silently groaned and made a face. If it was any other day, he would have completely tuned out the words, considering that he was saying the same things every day, with only slight variations to spice up the delivery.
But this time, on this day, he had to try his best to leave a good impression on everyone before the event, and that meant having to endure whatever meaningless drivel was being spouted at him. He had to make that sacrifice, for what would soon come after dinner.
5:30 pm: Dinner
Dinnertime was usually the same as lunch, with the added exception of more talking and gossiping, so it was nothing to comment on.
If anything was different about it, Simon noted it would be the current mood that was being passed around the Great Hall, with the conversations that were being held by the followers all gravitating around the event and how excited they were for it.
Getting caught up in the feeling as well, he felt a growing sense of worry, yet at the same time determination welling up inside him, as he eagerly finished his food in an instant and waited for it to begin.
I can do it… I can do it! Any moment now!
7:00 pm: The Goddess Initiation
At long last, as the clock struck 7 after a long day of training, studying, and praying, the moment that every single follower of the society was looking forward to finally arrived.
“It’s starting!”
“Initiation! Initiation! Initiation!”
The frenzied chants from the followers kickstarted the event as they all rushed back to the main square, where all the preparations were already complete and ready for them.
Different from the morning, three small tents had been erected in front of the goddess’ statue, with an elderly society follower sitting behind a table inside each of them.
These three elderly people were no ordinary followers either, but high-ranking followers of the Elder’s Circle, a group of people specifically hand-picked by the leader himself based on certain criteria.
That criteria to get into the Elder’s Circle had also been tied into the current event as well, for reasons that the normal followers were not aware of, and they couldn’t understand even if they knew it.
“Come and prove your worth,” the three chanted in unison, a vague message that was soon quickly echoed by everyone else in the square.
“Prove your worth! Prove your worth!”
When the members had all gathered together in a neat formation, at a respectful distance away from the tents, the Elder stood on a small podium in front of all of them before beginning his opening address.
“Gentlemen and ladies… boys and girls… dearest followers of the Church of Enlightenment and the public… we are here today for one singular purpose, to fulfil our promise of moving forward into the future! For today, we begin our yearly Goddess Initiation!!!”
“Initiation! Initiation! Initiation!”
The Elder raised his hand to silence the rowdy crowd before continuing.
“As you are all well aware, the Goddess Initiation and the subsequent trials are held every year with one sole objective, to find a candidate among the people capable of receiving… the illustrious Goddess’ Gift.”
As he finished his statement, he paused and waited for the weight of his statement to settle in, even if he was sure most of his followers already knew it.
“Now,” he proceeded with his speech after a while, “while I understand that this event is only held once a year, and we are all excited about it, we must also be conscious of ourselves. The Gift is not something that anyone can receive, but it is also not something that we should fight over. Just because you are not compatible doesn’t mean that makes you any less of a valuable follower here in the Church. It is also for this reason that we allow people who are outside our Church to join us as well! For it is important that we support whoever passes the Initiation and the subsequent trials in order to allow ourselves to grow and believe! That is the way of the Church!”
“Way of the Church!” Simon made his voice especially prominent among the crowd as he chanted excitedly with them.
“Good! Now, without further ado, let us begin!”
“Yeah!!!”
With that loud cheer, the Goddess Initiation finally and properly began.
**********************
“…”
As soon as the event had started, and everyone had begun to queue up in front of the tents, awaiting their turn with anticipation, Renare had moved silently away from the main crowd and was sitting on the steps of the Great Hall by herself, staring blankly at the queues with no hint of excitement or eagerness.
“Huh?”
Noticing that she was not with him inside the long queue, Simon quickly located where she was and left the queue before walking over to her with slight concern.
“… you’re not joining?”
“Nah,” she shrugged, “I’m not fond of this Initiation business. Been avoiding them every year.”
“Is that why you claimed you were sick last year? And the year before? And probably before that too? I was wondering about that.”
“Yeah, I don’t think faking sick is good enough for me anymore. I’ll just stay here until the ceremony is complete.”
“Hm. Why all the avoidance though?” he curiously asked.
“…”
“Was it because you were not chosen to be a candidate? Results can change, you know.”
“… Simon.”
She did not reply to his question, but instead she looked him squarely in the eyes and spoke to him with a straight, genuine look on her face.
“You shouldn’t worry about me. You should be concerned about yourself. Listen, in the years that I have known you, you are one of the best people that I have ever met. We have prepared years for this, and this is your time to prove yourself, not mine. So, you have to make yourself proud, for me and for all of us.”
“… alright.”
“And who knows,” she added, “if you really become a candidate, I’ll gladly be your mentor! Better someone you know than someone you don’t, right?”
“Yeah! Okay!”
“Go get it, Brother Simon.”
She stood up and suddenly punched him in the shoulder without warning, causing him to step backwards.
“Ow! Hey!”
“Oops, sorry.”
“It’s okay, it doesn’t hurt,” he lightly chuckled, despite his scrunched-up face and hand tightly grabbing his shoulder saying otherwise, “now, I’m off.”
“See ya.”
As he walked away, still clutching his shoulder, Renare watched him leave before softly mumbling to herself.
“I hope he gets it.”
**********************
“Aptitude, 45%. You are ineligible to wield the Goddess’ Gift.”
“Oh, man!”
“Next!”
This is it.
Seeing the numerous dejected faces on the rejected applicants as they shuffled out of the tent had not fazed Simon in the slightest as he queued up again. In fact, as he got closer and closer, he only felt more powerful, more focused on a successful outcome, even if it was not necessarily his call to make.
I will make it in this year!
The fact that other non-followers of the Church were also in the running did not bother him in the slightest.
As he was well aware, people who believed themselves to be able to receive the Goddess’ Gift had to be screened and measured based on how the elderly members inside the tents, also referred to as the ‘Judges’, analyzed them.
Should anyone score below a 90% aptitude according to any of them, they would not be eligible and would have to try again next year or give up entirely.
Since aptitude scores were claimed by the Elder himself to be susceptible to change depending on how ‘prepared’ the applicants were, that drove home the idea that extra preparation was necessary for them to increase their scores.
To that end, Simon, along with many other people who believed that they could be eligible, took their training very seriously, especially if they had been close to reaching that threshold before.
Having been rejected the last two times with scores of 85% and 88% respectively, Simon knew that he could fail this year again. However, as he went inside the tent, he simply pushed all those doubts aside, steeled himself and hoped for the best.
I believe in my success!
“Good… evening… Madam Judge… my name is…”
“There’s no need for introductions,” the elderly female Judge in the tent spoke with a soothing voice as she placed her palm on the table, “just pass me your hand, and I’ll test for your potential.”
“R-right…”
Here goes nothing.
Gulping with a dry throat, he stepped forward until he was right in front of the table before slowly reaching his hand out and placing it on her wrinkly palm.
“Hmmm…”
Much like the other two times, he quickly felt a strange tingling sensation emanating from her hand. It felt warm, almost as if his hand was becoming colder and number. It was an unsettling feeling for anyone who was inexperienced, but he kept his hand on her palm as she began her analysis.
“Hmm… a healthy lifeline… straight headline… and the fate line, very interesting…”
“…”
Gradually getting into it as well, he closed his eyes and concentrated on his thoughts, moving his ambitious ones to the forefront, something that he believed to be his best chance to change the possible outcome of the reading.
“Ooh.”
The sudden surprised gasp from the Judge caused him to open his eyes again and look at her face.
Is that… good? Or did I…
As his mind raced, he watched as she gently placed her other hand on top of his before her face broke out into a wide smile.
“Um…”
He had not seen that reaction from a Judge before, so he felt the urgent need to make a comment on it, worrying that he was doing something wrong. However, before he could, she opened her mouth again.
“DEAREST BROTHERS AND SISTERS!!!”
“Uuu…”
Slightly alarmed by her loud shouting, he attempted to step back such that his ear was less close to her mouth, but he was held in place by her hands, which were still tightly holding onto his own, as she continued.
“I HAVE MONUMENTAL NEWS! THIS YOUNG MAN HERE HAS WON THE RIGHT TO RECEIVE THE GODDESS’ GIFT, AT A 98% APTITUDE RATING! HE IS ELIGIBLE TO BE A CANDIDATE!”
… oh dang.
The news hit him like a truck, a fast and direct impact. As the Judge finally released him from her grip, he suddenly felt a little lightheaded, stumbling forward and grabbing the table to support himself.
I… did it?
He had expected to take his success very well, but as he looked down at the table’s smooth surface, his breaths short and quick, he somehow still felt that it was impossible that the good news could come so straightforwardly.
I did it. I did it!
But soon, the denial vanished completely as it was quickly replaced by the feeling of pride and accomplishment, and he immediately steadied himself with a giddy smile on his face.
The fact remained that he did not just qualify for the chance to receive the Goddess’ Gift, he had done so with a staggering 98% score, something that he had never heard before in the past two years where he had attended the event.
… I deserve this.
It was something that he had to brag over everyone, that was his first thought. Before he realized it, the pride had grown to become a sense of superiority. He knew that he had to showcase himself to everyone, to set an example of what a valuable member of the Church he was.
Of all of those people, he especially felt the urge to celebrate his achievement with Renare, considering that he knew how much they had prepared for this moment to come. It was something that he needed, out of everything else.
“Did you hear that, everyone? I—”
However, as soon as he turned around to face the crowd, ready to highlight his joy and gratefulness of being eligible, he stopped as soon as he heard the shouting.
“One of the Judges collapsed!”
“Quick, someone help him up!”
“Stop the Initiation!”
“… huh?”
That was not the response he had been expecting, but if it was a Judge having some issues, that would obviously be a bigger focus than him at the moment, so he shrugged it off and walked out of the tent, entering a chaotic mess of noise and panic.
Looking to his right, he could see that the entire crowd had gravitated towards the tent where he assumed the fainted Judge was, but due to the massive number of people blocking his view, he could not see who it was that fainted, or what the cause was.
Ah, that’s ok. I hope he’s fine.
“He’s waking up!”
“Give him some space!”
“Are you okay, sir?”
Guess I spoke too soon. Maybe now I can showcase myself to everyone.
“He’s saying something!”
“One… hundred… and ten?”
… eh?
“110%?”
“No way, 110%? Her?”
“Who is that girl?”
And just like that, with that one simple number, the feeling of superiority had been ripped away from him in one cruel twist of fate.
As the news quickly went around the surprised and fascinated people until it finally reached him, he could only stand frozen in place, blinking slowly with his mouth agape.
“What?”