Nannade was in her Hammock, bored, too bored to fall asleep. The last few days had dragged on. She had finished the last of her days with another druid of the Lodge, a pudgy pencil pusher by the name of Herlewin, for her test of moral commensuration. All in all, she had been with him for three months, three whole months of mind-numbing boredom, with interruptions for the Beg for Fertility and a few contracts alongside Teacher Garetas. She would carry Herlewin’s stuff to court dates, finalize his notes and every time he went into review of guilt and punishment, he would turn to her and ask for her detailed opinion on why or why not and how much some farmer should be fined for overstepping some land marker to his neighbour’s field. But now she had nothing left to do and it was even worse.
The entire time was just to spite her, that much was obvious. Arch-Druid Loganna still hadn’t approved her request to gain permission to take on a familiar. Elissa had said Loganna had “better things to do” and that she “had to run Sturreland after all” as if she didn’t have assistants and the Highest Circle by her side for all the menial tasks. Nannade could tell the old hag never liked her, because she wasn’t a 'proper' apprentice of the Lodge, but of Garetas, an outsider. Nannade knew the ritual to bind a familiar well. She even had a few spirits that trusted her and often came to her side when she called. She could do it. But she’d get in trouble if some stamp wasn’t pressed on some paper first. They hadn’t even announced when she would finally get her call sign and the first mark of approval. If she had that, she’d be officially allowed to take on contracts as a Hidden Hand, even though she remained an apprentice until she had at least three marks of approval. Still, finally graduating and moving on, what a dream it would be! She wanted to see Halonnes! Garetas’ was playing secretive but Elissa let enough information slip already.
And Garetas was the worst offender of the all, actually. He stopped taking her on contracts, wouldn’t even tell her where he went. It was as if he had completely dumped her off on Elissa and wouldn’t ask for an audience with the Arch-Druid on Nannade’s behalf. She thought about seeing Carsten and Fiona, but they also had things to take care off. The few friends she had all got married, built houses, expected children, sowed their own fields and she was still sitting in her Teachers’ hut, reading books on alternative theories to the four petals of magic domains and on extended contracts with non-natural spirit entities.
She decided to go for a walk. She took off her night gown, climbed down the rope next to her hammock carefully, making sure not to wake Garetas, and walked out into the forest in her undergarments. Sometimes she really hated clothes. They could get really disgusting, accumulating all the frowst and loose hair of her fur. She wondered if her people walked around naked in their lands. Or at least less covered. Maybe in wide, flowing robes and coats, maybe like she was right now. She dug the claws on her toes into the soft ground, to feel the soil. The forest air was just cool enough for her taste. It was a starry night. She liked the milky swirl of stars, how it seemed to watch over everything as it trailed across the sky each night. What could it see? What could it tell her? In the realm beyond the veil, there was bound to be a being that could tell her all the answers she desired. Elissa didn’t want Nannade to call or even talk to spirits not originating from nature. Maybe, if she asked, Garetas would allow Nannade to get a mark of approval from a church or divine college. Fulgopolis, Chsyatana, Havnarsund; any of these would do. Speaking to beings apart from foxes, mice, owls, cats, wolves and all the other things living their lives in the forest would be a thing of her dreams. Something that was beyond the little terms that little minds used, yes, that’s what her life was lacking!
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“Justice” Garetas had once said, “is not something we cast or decide. It is something we dispense. If you have a writ or an order of execution or apprehension, then you are free to see that it is carried out whichever way you like. No matter the collateral. We can move outside the law if we wish.” was this the freedom he had promised her? Slightly longer chains and a slightly more comfortable collar? If she could choose between taking this “freedom” for herself or settling down, she’d most likely go with the latter. Suddenly, staying with Carsten and founding a family didn’t seem so boring, maybe she shouldn’t had given up on him, even if he was an ass and a bastard. They could adopt orphans or she could free and adopt a child from slavery, like Garetas once did.
She had walked quite a bit and she started to feel that familiar presence again, her friend from far away. Her secret friend would help her when she was in danger and watch over her without holding her back. They understood each other. Her friend knew of “justice”, knew of those that deserve it. Garetas would often say “learning has to hurt.” Her friend agreed with that, but also added that so should punishment; that pain is a blessing on the wicked for their betterment. Mercy is not something Nannade should grant to the merciless.
She noticed that she had walked with her friend a far distance. She was closer to the Glade than she was to the hut. She hastened her step and soon arrived at the bridge to the Glade. There she paused for thought. It was here that she would finally take on a familiar. She would find an animal spirit that she liked and that liked her, and then find the spirit’s mundane counterpart. A cat for a cat spirit, a fox for a fox spirit, she knew the ritual well. She would open the mundane to allow the spirit to enter and finally seal it with her mind. A portion of her mind as glue and connection, forever binding the two, as long as both lived. And the familiar would be her ally and her crutch. Helping her because she did not have the Arcane Gift.
Yes, she knew the ritual. She could find all the ingredients herself nearby. She didn’t even need a blade, her claws were sharp enough. Her friend reminded her, there are closer bonds than that between a medium and their familiar. She felt that power again, coming over her like a mantle, she thirsted for it, as if her body had suddenly lost a hindrance and a haze had been lifted that had concealed her own potential. She remembered something, a promise she had made long ago, like a half-forgotten dream coming back to her. She had made up her mind. Garetas had told her so long ago, if she could take her freedom, she shall have it, yet he did everything to hold her back: not allowing her to gather experience on missions, not teaching her in any weapons but knife and bow, not imparting some of his more powerful spells on her. And Elissa abided all of this. She had let herself be influenced by him, let her heart be fooled. She knew well she could never have Garetas, but she couldn’t let go. The grown-ups were acting like idiots.
Garetas needed to learn the consequences of his moralistic grandstanding. He promised her freedom but gave her nothing, it was time she took it. It was her time to surpass him and his arrogance. Her friend agreed.
It is time. Fulfil the promise. My Temple. My Priestess.