One morning, as Azi and Kajima were getting breakfast cooked up in their little camp, Kajima suddenly yawned as he was cutting up the wild vegetables, edible plants, and meat they harvested during their patrols. It wasn’t hard work, but the long night watch had taken its toll and he was the last one on duty.
“Kajima, if you need to, you can go rest.” Azi offered. He gestured for Kajima to hand the knife to him. “I’ll handle the cooking today. Rest before we set out, it’s only a little time, but sleep is sleep, even if it is a nap.”
“You sure? It’s a lot of work making enough stew for 3 people.”
“I’ve done it a bunch of times now, so it’s no problem, go. Get some sleep.” Azi gave him a friendly nudge with his elbow. “We’ll need you in top form if we run into monsters. I’ll make sure to scoop your portion with more meat in it. It’s the least I can do for all your lessons.”
“Heh, thanks and you make good sense Azi, I’ll take you up on that. I’ve done most of the chopping so not much left. I’ll let you handle it. Make sure to keep the blade side of the knife down, alright?”
“Oh come on, I know Kajima. You don’t have to worry.”
“Yeah, but I prefer we all stay on the safe side of things.”
Azi nodded reluctantly, accepting Kajima’s warning, which made him feel like he was being treated as a child. Kajima trotted off to his tent and Azi saw his back disappear behind the tent’s flap. He heard the audible thump as the big man tucked in.
Kajima of all people had been burdened with most of the labor in managing their little campsite, and on top of that there were the patrolling and forest survival lessons he was giving to Azi. Such an experienced man. Though his growing fatigue was inevitable in his old age which must’ve come with the experience.
Tending to the large stock of ingredients Azi got to chopping the last of them up. Specifically ,he cut the meat in an odd way. It wasn’t chunks typical of stews but slices as thin as he could get them.
“Right, now onto the boiling. It should be this first, then that and that.. and.. that. And, Oh? Let’s try this today.”
The stew, like it was the days before, was again a mix of any kind of veg they could harvest or had brought along in their packs. Of course, there wasn’t much left from their bag this many days into their outing.
While they had brought rations from the village those were for lunch on patrol since they were portable and easier to eat.
Hardtack and dried fruit were the norm for soldier food and they would eat them on the move to make the most of the daylight they had. They all hated the stuff but had to bear with it since it kept longer and didn’t spoil as fast.
It was that or go hungry for the middle of the day.
As Azi was adding, setting, and stirring the veg into a big pot of stew hung over the campfire, a noise got his attention. It was someone coming out of one of the tents. From which tent it was Shizu, he guessed, and he was right.
She gave a big yawn like Kajima. But, on the contrary to her usual noble demeanor, she seemed like any other village girl. Plus, by the looks of it she was not much of a morning person. The sleep sand in her eyes and the grogginess in her steps gave it away.
“Well, good morning princess.” Azi announced sarcastically as he poured and handed her a cup of hot water. “How might you be faring today? My dear lady.”
Shizu deadpanned and frowned at him, though still accepted the proffered hot beverage. It did her some good to get warmed up in the morning, but not so good with her already rising level of irritation.
“Please.. don’t talk to me with that fake posh attitude of yours, it gives me the creeps. What are you trying to pull?”
“Oh, nothing ma’am. I’m only giving a fair noble woman like yourself the proper etiquette.” Azi feigned a hurt look, getting a noticeable tick out of Shizu, just as he wanted. “But it seems I’ve displeased you, so as you wish~ Princess~.”
“Ugh, you’re the worst. Are you sure you're not from the Imperial Capital, you sound like one of the old farts in the court, and I mean the ones with a stick up their bums. Can you.. Huh?” Shizu’s reflexive frown suddenly morphed into an inquisitive look after she rubbed the sleep from her eyes and took a sip of hot water. She sniffed the air and her ears flicked, as if delighted.
Following her nose she walked over to the bubbling pot. Upon further inspection, today’s stew seemed to smell better than yesterday’s. Also, Azi was doing something strange with the meat they had scrounged up from a beowolf they hunted and butchered.
A rare few types of monsters had harvestable and edible meat that could supplement their supplies. Beowulf meat, unfortunately, was gamey, hard to eat, and overall was a poor excuse for real meat. Yet they ate it anyway since Kajima had wanted Azi to get a taste for it.
Shizu didn’t, but found the aroma of that so-called mock meat roasting on metal skewers to be appetizing, this was a first for her.
“What are you doing with those? Aren’t you going to add them to the pot of stew yet, or are we having weird tasting skewers along with stew today?” As good as it smelled, Shizu knew that aroma wasn’t everything when it came to food.
“No.” Azi said, dropping that feign formal tone of his. “I had an idea last night about how to improve the stew. Thought I should try it out.”
“Oh? How so? And what was your dream about?” Shizu sat down to continue drinking from her cup as Azi got back to stirring the stew.
He explained that the parts of his dream that he could remember this time were blurred and that one moment was of himself in a sort of kitchen. Of course in the dream, he was cooking with how the direction of the topic was going. Apparently an unknown and blurred man, likely a chef, was instructing him.
The chef was showing how to properly use all the cuts of meat from an animal Azi couldn’t put a name. Then the chef moved on and even used the less flavorful and tougher cuts of meat, explaining how to make them into tasty dishes even though they were undesirable.
He continued and turned one of the skewers over. The nicely roasted and browned color of the meat made Shizu salivate so much that she didn’t hear Azi’s part where he said that roasting the meat first and then putting it into a stew added to the overall flavor profile. Shizu, having only heard bits and pieces, found that dubious.
“Hmmm.. So I get that you’re cooking it to get it dried out and then putting it in the stew. That doesn’t sound promising. The meat will be too tough when we boil it after the roast.” Skeptical of how a dream was dictating today’s meal, Shizu wasn’t sure to put any stock in Azi’s ability to cook.
“How do you know if it will even work to improve the flavor? Tough meat is one thing but don’t ruin the taste of the stew, I don’t want it to taste all greasy and fatty.”
“Let’s have a taste then.” Azi took one of the done skewers from the campfire and pulled off a roasted strip of meat. After handing half of the moderately hot strip of meat to Shizu, he took the first bite of his own half and smiled.
“Mmmmh, that's good. Nothing like a freshly cooked slice of meat.”
Still skeptical, Shizu took a small bite. It was still tough meat but its small and thin size made it easier to chew. The excessive fatty taste was surprisingly toned down and she realized that Azi had removed it somehow with the way he was cooking it.
He explained that he was rendering off the fat, making the meat taste come through rather than all that wretched slimy greasiness. It didn’t make sense to Shizu. She thought her sister Rulu would be able to better understand why this worked. Woah, this is good. Shizu thought and licked away the last drips of meat juices on her fingers.
“Is it good?” Azi asked her, and she could see the grin on his face. “By the way you're smiling Shizu, it seems like you’re enjoying it.”
She coughed and wiped her mouth.
“Ahem! It’s.. Adequate.” She humbled her words and wasn’t one to flatter anyone, especially not with how smug Azi was being. It made him frown.
“Hmmmm.. Man, I was hoping you’d say you liked it.” It was disappointing that he couldn’t get any better reaction out of her. He bet he wasn’t much of a cook in his past. “Guess I can’t get it as good as my dad’s.”
“Huh?” Shizu startled for a moment. “Dad? Do you remember your family, Azi?”
“I.. well.. Wait. What did I just say?” Confused, Azi thought back and realized he said the word dad unintentionally. It came out of nowhere and it made him blink in surprise. He tried to remember why he had said that. “No, I just.. Said it on.. Re.. flex. Huh?”
The sound of his voice went softer as, suddenly, a wet sensation fell down his cheek. Azi wiped it away and found that he was crying.
“W-what is this? I.. I’m..”
He breathed heavily, images that he once thought of as only dreams came to him in a haze. A father who talked and taught him all kinds of hobbies, a mother who was strict, and a life.. a life.. A life? It stopped there. There wasn’t anything else left for him to remember, only a feeling that whatever was supposed to be there was gone.
That he was gone, and all alone in his head. Poof, it all evaporated in an instant.
“Azi?” Shizu called to him, but he looked out of it. “You alright? Hey, come on, stop creeping me out.”
“Ah, uh? Yeah. I’m fine.” Rubbing his tears away, Azi tried to cover up how he looked, probably pathetic, but Shizu was keen enough to see the signs he didn’t. Azi.. was remembering.
She scooted next to him on the log and pulled his head to lean him onto her shoulder.
“W-what are you doing Shizu? This is.. Hmmm.” Azi groaned, this was getting awkward by the second. She was pushing the metaphorical letter of what he could tell was her usual antics of teasing him.
“You can talk about it, Azi.” Shizu said. It was an abruptly compassionate tone for a change. “It’s better if you speak up then keep it inside.” She said softly.
“I’m fine, I’m fine.” Azi assured tepidly. “I just..”
“Don’t lie.” Interrupted by Shizu, Azi was turned to face her. Shizu’s red colored eyes looked deeply into him. “I can tell when people are disturbed. I’ve had my share of times where I’ve seen the distraught masses from trauma and war. Children, elders, and parents. As a noble, it’s my duty to hear the people’s voice, and you are one of them. You’re my responsibility, so spill it.”
Her method wasn’t very accommodating since she was forcefully grasping his face. Though, her tone spoke true of how she only wanted to help. Sniffling, Azi still held his composure, but the cracks were showing. His brown eyes quivered and he nodded back timidly, letting slip a few words that he hoped would placate Shizu and get her to stop bringing this up.
He didn’t like to remember memories if they brought him to tears. It felt wrong, out of order.. unneeded.
“I.. I’ve had dreams.”
“Nightmares?” Shizu asked and Azi replied with a shake of his head.
“They're not nightmares, they’re a mix of good and bad dreams. I always forget them when I wake up. It’s like grasping for a kite inches out of reach, I have the string tethering my hand to it but I can’t reel it in no matter how much I try. Some of it.. The dreams.. They came back.. Just now. This is a first.” Shizu let him go and he clutched his arm.
“I can only look at them from a distance in my dream. But there is this one dream, a recent one.”
Shizu thought back to last night. Azi's sleep talking reminded her of the recent pains he had while he slept.
“What was it about?”
“It was.. It was..” Azi paused to gulp. “It was about a time when I was younger. I was, or I think I was, picked on?”
“You were bullied?” Shizu said and her words irked Azi.
“No, not my peers, older kids, kids that were jealous of me for some reason. They called me a.. freak.” Azi's face went cold and tucked his head low. “They thought I was different and that I didn’t belong. That I was nothing but.. But..”
His words caught on themselves. It was too hard to talk about, and Azi gritted his teeth, the works possibly permanently locked behind them.
“It’s alright Azi.” Patting his back, Shizu held out her cup of hot water to him. “Here, drink. If you don’t want to explain, then you can cry.”
“I’m not a kid Shizu. I can’t be a kid, not at my age, not anymore.” Azi refused Shizu’s. She subsequently bumped him in the shoulder, annoyed with his moodiness.
“But crying doesn’t make you a kid Azi, it just means you’re sad, so cry, cry until you can’t anymore. Or are you too much of a coward?”
“You know, that doesn’t help when you call me that.” Azi frowned, yet a hint of embarrassment was there on his face.
“Heh, well too bad, now come here.”
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Azi gulped as Shizu offered him a hug. Both the trauma of being suffocated from before and the fact that he wasn’t sure if he could let himself show vulnerability kept him from accepting. Boys, men, never wanted to cry, it was mortifying.
“I’m fine.”
“You sure? How about a shoulder?”
Azi sighed, Shizu was being persistent.
“Sure.. whatever.” he mumbled and leaned in as he rested his head lightly on Shizu. A few minutes passed and Shizu got to stirring the stew in place of Azi.
“Sorry, but can I have a couple more minutes?” He asked. “I know I’m crowding you and making you cook but I’m feeling better.”
Answering him without saying a word, Shizu wrapped her arm around his back and shoulder, leaning him closer to her. It was a sweet gesture and a heartfelt sight but nothing too out of place. It was only a comrade helping another comrade.
“Go ahead, I won’t tell anyone that you cried.” Whispered Shizu, in that familiar teasing tone Azi was accustomed to. “It will be our little secret, except, you know, I’ll tease you about it later to make you cry some more.”
“Y-you're the worst.” Azi’s voice cracked. Shizu laughed and patted his head, ruffling his disheveled head of black hair.
“Yes yes, and so are you.”
A small smile broke through Azi’s mix of embarrassment and heartache as he let a few tears out. He had no clue as to why these tears were dropping from his eyes, but the tide stalled within him.
They stayed like that for a few minutes and Shizu paralleled how she did this before with her younger sister Rulu or even small children in the capital. One event stuck out though, it was when their mother had passed and Rulu had cried every night after. It took a year until Rulu stopped grieving but every night Shizu was there to hear her out.
As his tears stopped, Azi wiped the last of it away and sighed. Separating from Shizu he gave her an embarrassed nod and got to stirring the stew.
“Thanks.”
Shizu grinned and Azi immediately mentally wanted to take back his thanks.
***
Finishing up breakfast, Shizu went out on patrol to a nearby area they had yet to get started in surveying. As she went out, Kajima continued his lessons with Azi.
Right in the middle of another lesson on herbs, they heard a loud crashing sound coming from the direction of where Shizu had gone for her short patrol. The lesson came to an abrupt end and it had only been a few minutes since she left, so she could not have gotten far.
Still, that was no comfort and the loud thuddings sounded familiar to Kajima. A battle. Kajima hopped to and equipped himself. Azi did the same. They hoped Shizu was alright and could handle whatever situation she found herself in.
***[During Shizu’s Search]***
Making her way through the forest near the encampment they had settled in, Shizu wished that a route through this forest would’ve been made by now. The path wasn’t marked so she notched symbols into nearby trees to keep her way.
Really, this forest was unkempt and it wasn’t as if Shisayama’s village chief hadn’t tried building a footpath through this forest. Doing so would have opened easier trade to the neighboring villages, while not as big as Shisayama, those villages further in the south western frontier had purpose.
As she got closer to a particular trodden path that led to the mountains, a strange outcropping of stones on the side of the way forward caught her attention. It had a few destroyed trees atop the sizable stones.
Each tree was massive and was broken as if it was ripped in half across its length. As she thought about what could have moved and destroyed these trees, she made her way to get a closer look at the spectacle. It could’ve been the beowolves, who had used the fallen trunks to scratch and groom its fur.
Or, the gengiri, who were probably eating away at the trees. Those disgusting creatures could eat anything, including humans and each other.
Shizu suddenly stopped in her tracks. A slight rustling from the rock outcropping had her on guard. The rocks were covered in snow, caked in the piles of obvious white colored specks. A few noticeable specks fell from the stones. Earthquake? No, they don’t happen that often here and they’re not that small. What was that?
Taking a few moments to look around, Shizu concluded that the rustling was just her imagination. The ground hadn’t shook again, so possibly it was just a trick of her own mind.
She turned to inspect the treeline. Double checking wouldn’t hurt, and when she finished that she would return to camp and get the others.
Having more eyes on the job would work to rectify if she had or not had seen something. She took a single step towards the trees but that rustling noise came to her ears again, but this time.. It was much louder.
She looked back and was horrified by what she saw. The rock outcropping was moving as it seemingly rose up, snow fell off to reveal an insect-like maw, thick mandiables, and fleshy legs. It got up to stand and before she knew it, the thing charged at her.
A long white blur dashed at her before she could react in full. Partially guarding herself with her metal umbrella raised, she successfully avoided getting directly struck with the full brunt of whatever had attacked her.
The blown back sent her back and she was pushed into a nearby boulder which sounded with a hard and dull impact that rang in her ears.
“Grah! What the heck, what’s one of these doing here?”
Shizu quickly got to her feet and began engaging in a defensive battle with the assailant. Her foe had drawn first strike and Shizu could not retaliate as the enemy continued its assault with an apparent long claw.
The foe was a Kengiri which are similar to the gengiri but were much larger as they stood at a height of 3 meters and a length of 3 meters.
It had a white carapace which was why she didn’t spot it since it blended in with the snowy surroundings. What was much more menacing than its size was the two lobster-like claws it had.
The Kengiri's that made Shisayama’s land their home would rarely nest in the forest and instead stayed high in the mountains in caves to keep warm during the winter. It was unexpected to find one at this time of year in the forest of all places.
What brought it here? No, no time to think, gotta fight!
Clashing with the Kengiri, Shizu kept weapon raised. Killing it would be difficult on her own and the more she evaded the more fatigue she’d accumulate. The bruise on her back was also affecting her. Luckily, minutes later, she could hear Kajima's voice behind her.
"Get back, quickly!!"
Shizu glanced in the direction of the voice and saw that Azi and Kajima had rushed over to see what was happening. She almost laughed since Azi was riding atop Kajima's back. Shizu could guess that it was likely because he could not keep up with Kajima in a full sprint.
Shizu jumped back in response to their arrival, but was not quick enough. Her minor injury made her a second too slow and as she was again blown back by the Kengiri's claw arm strike that impacted the flat cover of her metal umbrella.
"Shizu!.. Damnit!” Azi hissed at the beast and then tensed his throat to speak. He made a few gestures to Kajima. “Kajima, Get me to her and then move there."
“Huh? Oh! I see what you mean.”
Understanding the gestures Azi was making, Kajima went along with his plan. Azi motioned to indicate himself to get to Shizu and then Kajima to the monster. This way they could check on Shizu as the threat of the Kengiri was abated by Kajima.
With the situation this dire, Kajima had no hesitation. He grabbed Azi by the scruff of his shirt, and with a deft heft he threw Azi to where Shizu was. Not slowing down, Kajima charged forward to meet the monster as a distraction.
While there was no issue in the execution of the idea Azi had, he himself was having second guesses now. When he told Kajima to get him over to Shizu, he knew he’d be tossed but not this hard.
Okay, so how do I land this?
Kajima charged at the Kengiri and intended to stab through one of its long, thick centipede-like legs. He tried but the Kengiri’s was the swifter fighter. Kajima ducked, a claw swung over him. Recovering, Kajima made to stab forward but backstepped instead. A sudden sore muscle in his back flared.
Ugh, I gotta really get back in shape. He knocked his side and took a fighting stance as the Kengiri clacked its mandibles at him.
“Come on monster!” He yelled. “I may be old! But I can still break you into bits!”
Kajima drove the enormous monster to look in his direction. Azi braced when he found that he was heading towards a patch of snow and was trying to land without getting hurt. He was failing.
Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!
Just before he thought he’d hit his head, a soft impact padded his momentum. Shizu had luckily caught him in time. He was relieved to see that she was reasonably alright but realized she had suffered another bruise to her right shoulder.
Shizu grunted in pain as the aftereffects of catching him had made her injury feel inflamed.
“You.. you really are a pain to deal with.” She said. “Why did you go get yourself tossed?”
“Ask me later, this isn’t the time.” Azi took out ointment and bandages from a pouch on his belt. “Here, patch yourself up, I’ll call for help.”
Shizu nodded and got to dressing her bruises.
Azi then made a snap decision and took out the red tube from the pouch on his hip. He aimed it up and pulled the cord hard.
In a pop, a red magic flare went flying up into the sky. It would signal the other western forest parties to converge on their location. Now, he, Shizu, and Kajima needed to buy time for them to arrive.
Azi wasn’t sure if they were strong enough to fight this foe, it was enormous, probably the biggest and most ferocious insect he had ever seen.
Shizu's long brown furred ears suddenly twitched. Hearing some rustling in the nearby bushes, she grimaced through the soreness in her shoulder as she got to her feet. She readied herself. Azi caught on and did so as well.
He took out his short sword and raised his shield beside her. Out from the surrounding snow covered bushes ahead came numerous gengiri who turned their red insect eyes on them.
“I see 6 in total in front. Shizu? How about you?" Azi tried to keep the fear in his voice from showing. He wasn’t the best at keeping calm under a life and death situation.
Shizu’s ears twitched again and heard another rustling of bushes from their rear. She frowned at what she turned and saw.
"Another 3 but they are behind us. They have us in a pincer here. We need to hold out. Kajima!” Shizu called out as Kajima blocked an incoming strike to his side with the pole of his halberd. He backstepped, gaining some distance as he kept the Kengiri in sight as he answered.
“Yeah, I hear you. I'll keep the kengiri in place and deal with it, you two handle the gengiri and make it quick!"
"No, you won't be able to hold out on your own." Shizu shouted. “I’ll help you keep its attention and stay on the defensive. I’ll back you up as I get rid of those gengiri at the front. If I don’t, you’ll be boxed in.”
“Ugh. Dang it.” Shizu was right, Kajima hadn’t noticed the new arrivals. He hoped Azi could keep up with the battle. “Ok, Azi, hang in there alright.”
“Y-Yeah.” Azi didn’t sound all that confident but who would? Anyone who saw a Kengiri for the first time would cower, even Kajima had in his younger years.
While blocking another blow from the Kengiri's claws, Kajima listened in.
Shizu turned to Azi, she could see he was trembling in fear. This kind of fear was familiar to her. In new soldiers specifically, they cowered like this in times of sudden danger.
She nonetheless gave him his instructions with an assuring and commanding tone as she would with any soldier.
"Azi, I need you to hold off the 3 gengiri behind us. You got that?”
Heck no! But Azi didn’t say it, he couldn’t refuse to not try to fight for his survival.
"Y-Yes, I-I'll do m-my best." He attempted to speak in the best resolute manner that he could manage. Fear leaked out of him.
Shizu put a hand on his shoulder, giving him a sidelong glance, an assured smile on her lips. "Only defend and don't die. Now GO! You can do this Azi, just hold on."
Affirming her with a nod, a sense of duty began burgeoning within Azi’s heart. This was a first, he felt so alive and afraid at the same time.
This is combat, this is fighting, this is what it takes to live out here. I have to try, I have to do my best. I can’t be a burden on the team.
Screaming his thoughts in his head to drive away his hesitation, he got into a ready position to face the 3 gengiri at the party's rear. Shield raised and sword pointed forward, he presented the best rock solid stance he could as he stared down his opponents.
Shizu was impressed by Azi's resolve to hold his ground and cried out in a rallying manner, hoping that it would help.
“We can do this! Let’s go!”
Shizu rushed forward, her back to Azi and Azi’s back to her. Meeting the 6 gengiri at the front, she leveled the umbrella on them like a hammer, slamming it into the snow.
They scattered and skitted. Glancing to the Kengiri, Shizu saw a chance as the Kengiri staggered from Kajima’s strike to one of its legs. A swing clanged off its side. The outer shell cracked but didn’t bleed.
Dang, tough as ever. But, I got its attention.
Her actions prevented the kengiri from focusing its attention on Kajima. It now had to contend with and be wary of Shizu's occasional heavy strikes. A few of those would break its carapace if it didn’t dodge.
“Dang It!” Shizu missed with one of her swings.
With her right shoulder bruised, she had to use her less dominant left hand to wield her weapon, and couldn’t use her trump card with only one arm. But even with a disadvantage, Shizu was making quick work of the first couple of gengiri while also landing a few glancing hits on the kengiri.
On the other hand, Azi's situation could have been better.
Multiple strikes battered against his shield, his left arm was going completely numb from his improper bracing and positioning he had.
It was hard to keep track of everything going on, the mental pressure made his vision tunnel and paranoia was getting to him. He at least could still hear his pounding heart, it gave him the only steady rhythm to ground himself in this fight.
A noise caught his attention, it was the kengiri and it made an apparent few clicking noises from its mouth.
Out of nowhere, the 3 gengiri Azi was facing began attacking him even fiercer than before. Shizu’s opponents also began kiting her around.
No way.
Azi hazarded a guess that the Kengiri was coordinating the gengiri in some way. He could tell that the gengiri planned to waste Shizu's time and evade her since she would be the highest threat among the three of them.
So as Shizu was delayed, the gengiri at the rear would move to kill the weakest member of the party, which was none other than Azi himself.
Legs stumbling as the gengiri attacked and lunged at him boldly, Azi felt frustrated by his lack of ability or being the odd one out. It was as if he was getting picked on and it felt familiar. The sight of the gengiri’s sharp mandibles turned into fists and the insect’s eyes turned into unfamiliar faces.
Every clack the Kengiri or gengiri made with their mandibles sounded like a laugh to him. They were looking down on him.
Stop it! Stop! Don’t! No! Azi thoughts spun as jeering voices from people he didn’t know grinded his gears.
No matter how much he studied or fought with any of the smaller monsters these past few days, he didn’t feel prepared enough for this fight when the moment called for him. His emotions distracted him and he was caught off guard.
He was hit in his left shoulder by one of the gengiri. Wounded with a deep cut on his previously bandaged injury, Azi screamed out in pain.
A burning sensation that ripped into him. The painful sensation began to spread from his left shoulder. He then noticed that the gengiri that attacked him had bits of benweed in its jaw and wriggling mouth.
From what he knew, benweed dulled the senses when ingested. When it got into an open wound it would cause a burning sensation due to how the plant's non-lethal poison would spread quicker through the bloodstream.
His pain brought him out of his thoughts as he stepped back to get away. The small injury and poison was disorienting him, if he kept being so close to the insects they would eat him alive. 2 of the 3 gengiri followed and attempted to strike.
His attempt to get away was a blunder, they were waiting for this chance. Off balance and a small stagger in his steps, Azi was left open. Time suddenly slowed from his perception as his mind was processing a sudden question.
Is this where I die? Is this where I fail? If! If I Fail, I die! I fail, I die! I fail, I die! I fail, I die! I fail, I die! Die! Die! Die! Die!
Anger suddenly marred his face. Coming from deep within his core, Azi gave a war cry as fear gripped him and rage flowed out of him. It enveloped his mind as the word die repeated in his head.
Broken memories began to suddenly take shape, he remembered a bottled up anger he hadn’t known was there before. It was forgotten, but why? Why? Why? Why? Why do that when, when, when? When what?
When you could let yourself go. A voice said.
As if it was the trigger, another trickle of memories from his past reminded him. Reminded that he had capped this long held emotion of rage for the sake of others, to put them, his so called friends, over his own self.
Self sacrifice, it was noble, but a bitter taste was left in Azi's mouth as the images of horrid and abusive women took shape in his mind.
Why was it not enough! Haven’t I suffered! Don’t I deserve to be happy! He didn’t know why he thought all this or to whom it was about, but Azi let all of these emotions loose towards the enemy that attempted to take something of his, his life, his.. happiness.
No more! He thought. No longer would he hold himself back, hold the emotions in. Nothing would get in his way. Not even these pests!