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Tales from the Milky Way
Humans are bards

Humans are bards

Have you ever heard of a bard? It’s something humans created. Bards are, in their tales at least, musicians who play music to inspire an ally, or sooth a broken heart. I believe humans created bards in their stories because deep down somewhere in their collective consciousness they knew that they were the bards they told stories of.

When humans entered the galactic scene it cause mass panic. I’m sure you remember the scene of all the senators in a frenzy to either get closer to, or farther away from the human representative. The whole galaxy was shut down for nearly a week! Ships grounded, travel banned, work suspended, and human space quarantined. It took a week of tests performed by scientists who were deaf to begin with or voluntarily got their ability to hear taken away to be part of the tests. A few people of every species were held in cages during the tests and the sounds and voices humans made were played on speaker to them. We’ll long story short humans have hypnotic voices.

A human can ask you to give them all of your money and unless you’ve practiced resisting them you will comply without thought. With that kind of ability humans could have ruled the galaxy without bloodshed! But they didn’t.

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Humans instead capitalized on their unique voices and used them to enhance the rest of us. Are you going to war? Humans will sing alongside the drums of war of blood and death and honor! They will make you invincible, for a price. Do you want to sell a product? A human will sing songs of how your product will change their lives and you can play it oh so quietly in the background of your advertisements. Do you have a sick family member? Yes humans can even cure the sick with their voice. It’s as if they convince the Illness to just leave.

Humans can sing you to sleep, sing you to health, sing you through the harshest of times. But they cannot sing for themselves. This miraculous ability they have is useless on their own kind. Illnesses that they can drive away in us will ravage their children as they sing until their vocal chords tear and their heartbeat fades into oblivion. Why do you think almost all of our more recent scientific breakthroughs are in medicine? Because the humans will make us gods with their voices for a price yes, but there are plenty of humans that will Freely sing songs in a park to brighten our day. Some even visit childrens hospitals with speakers to sing all of the children to health just on pure good will. We owe them at least the effort to save their children.

And today I will go out to the human home world to announce my advancement in nanotechnology that will allow us to cure ANY disease with one injection. And our friends will suffer no more.

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