My life seems to be a story about waking up. This time I wake from a feeling of being crushed and moved like I have felt once before. I open my eyes and yes, It's white now, but color is starting to bleed in and resolve itself into shapes. I tense, trying to ready myself for whatever danger may come my way. I am inside some kind of artificial cave, stone shaped into strange shapes. From openings that are not open light is coming in, I can guess it's daytime. The two things that draw my attention the most are a lot of people standing some distance away, lots of them in some shade of blue and the two standing close by on opposite sides of me, also in blue. Make that three things, on the floor around me are strange shapes and markings glowing with a white light which is repulsive even to look at. Instead I focus on the more immediate threat nearby.

A man and a young woman stand on either side of me. He is holding a staff and wearing dark blue clothing. He is standing with his back to a high wall, facing the woman and other people while the woman has her back to the crowd. He has short brown hair and the flat face and tiny ears I'm starting to get used to. She is wearing light blue clothing. Long yellow hair and lighter skin than I've seen before. Granted, I've not seen many of these weird creatures. She has her arms stretched out above where I am, palms of her hands down. Both of them are looking at me, which makes me nervous.

"Do you want to retry the summoning ritual, young miss? Everyone would understand that this was not a desired result."

The man speaks and my head whips in his direction. He isn't looking at me anymore, but at the yellow haired female. As glad as I am he is not looking at me, I feel I've just fallen into a trap and quickly face the woman. I won't be distracted that easily! The female is looking at me still. She is no longer holding her limbs above me, one is crossed in front of her body, which is a difficult feat for most swarmlings. The other hand is holding some 'hair' which she seems to be consuming. Is it a snack of some kind? No, I must not be distracted! She just looks at me, quietly, chewing on her hair. It takes some time for her to speak.

"It is acceptable. We will now perform the binding."

"As you wish, young miss."

The young female holds her arms above me, palms facing inside now. I look at those hands with cautious curiosity. Suddenly a white light starts to form between her hands. At the same time the circle of shapes around me brightens. Everything I have screams at me that this is something dangerous! Despite how revolting the lit up shapes on the floor are I throw myself forward to escape. I crash face first into some kind of barrier. I swear it wasn't there before! It didn't hurt that much and I start to claw at it. At first I thought it was smooth and even, but it wavers under my flurry of swipes. I am getting a result, I can feel it, so I pour every bit of energy in breaking through.

"While there is no risk of it breaking out, this is far from comfortable. I had not expected it to try and attack the invisible. If you please, young miss?"

"Be quiet. Let it tire itself out a bit, it's easier when it is distracted."

My attack on the invisible wall is not getting the result I expected. It still gives as much as before and does not feel any weaker. I slow down and eventually pause. I realize the noises those creatures make is communication, but I can't make sense of it. It's like those who moved the cages, always making so much noise. They should learn a proper way of communicating like the Swarm. A few noises, the move of a claw or ear, all of it together could say so much. My spirits sink. I am in a strange place and I got here from a strange place. For a moment I desperately wish to be back at the cliff with my kin.

In that moment it happens. It feels like something is clamping down on my head like the mandibles of a large beetle trying to crack a nut. I can't move, but I still try to resist the feeling. It goes on further, inside my head and something in me gives. There is a sensation like a tree branch snapping back in place when it's been pulled back, but without an actual branch. When it hits me it stuns me. As I recover there is the feeling that I am not alone, there is something behind me. I turn around quickly, but see nothing. It is still behind me and I whirl around again. Nothing! It feels like it's forever behind me and I turn again, again, again and again. High pitched female laughter stops me. Did I know what laughter was before?

"You're amusing, but stop. People will think you're defective and I can't have that."

I turn around a last time and end facing the young woman. I could understand the nonsense coming out of her mouth. My sensitive ears pick up sounds from others, but no, I still don't understand what they say. The man isn't paying much attention and is working on some of the runes of the magic circle. As if the knowledge randomly entering my thoughts of my own wasn't bad enough, information from her is now starting to mix in.

"I know you understand what I'm saying. You are bound as one of my familiar summons and it would be useless if you didn't. I will teach you and train you and you will obey me. Is that understood?"

She is slightly bent forwards and stares me in the eye. Naturally, I stare back. When she blinks I realize she has only one set of eyelids and blink my second set in response. I fish my new knowledge for a term. "Humannn," I snarl, and it is a snarl with emotions I have not felt before. Distaste so strong it's better to call it loathing knit tightly with resignation. I can feel her presence, she eclipses whatever strength I can muster. As much as it is to my disliking, I submit. I look away first and relax my posture to a slump, all the fight draining from me.

"Demon." She smiles, or at least shows her teeth. In the swarm, it is a threat, a show of strength and dominance. The corner of my mind where we are connected resonates 'yes'. It is a threat, she is stronger and she is the dominant one. "Follow me."

She turns and walks towards the crowd of people, many of them paying attention to her, but too many for my liking are paying attention to me. I have to scamper in a half-run to keep up with her walking speed and soon we move among the people. I try to stay as close as possible without getting in her way, which almost always succeeds. When I do get kicked not only does it hurt, but I can feel a little spike of annoyance coming from her. Slightly behind her and to the side seems to be the best place.

By now more humans are moving around her and a new hazard presents itself. I need to keep my tail safe. I really want to lash out at something and I nearly do when someone steps on my tail. Only because I know how many humans are here and because they are bigger and stronger than me do I manage to stop myself. I am not a coward, but I'm not stupid! Instead I lift my tail to keep it out of harms way and wrap it around my feet.

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I realize the humans are talking again, but since I can't understand anything else than what she says, and that barely makes sense, I ignore it in order to study my surroundings. Which takes all of a minute. What is a minute? All I can see is legs, knees and feet. Lots of different coverings for legs and feet mostly, but it's not that interesting. Looking up shows bellies and the underside of faces. They're not any nicer to look at from this angle. Nothing seems to be about to attack me, though I notice the occasional glance thrown in my direction, and I consider either going to sleep or finding something to eat.

Suddenly a leg and a foot come my way. It's a kick that is definitely aimed at me, but so slow. The rachnids back home are much faster. I still can't dodge it, but I manage to hook all my claws in my attacker when the kick makes contact. The pants tear with a delicious ripping sound, but the expected smell of blood doesn't come. The man, a quick look up confirming it is probably a man, is shaking his leg, yelling and screaming something like "gettitoff! gettitoff!". I tighten my grip and hold on with all I've got.

A grip around my neck is all the warning I get before I am ripped off my unusual perch. I still hold a decent sized piece of fabric in my claws, but again no blood. The one holding me is the woman and I go limp, the piece of cloth falling to the floor. I can see the man who kicked me now. I'm sure the humans would think him very distinct, but all I notice is that he does not have blue clothes, but does have brown hair. And he is missing the covering on his right lower leg. There are some white stripes on it where my claws left their mark on his skin, but I can't believe that is all. My claws should be able to pierce that easily! I felt the skin, it's soft, squishy, no resistance at all. I drool a little as I imagine what the meat underneath would taste like.

"Bertholf, I'd apreciate a modicum of decorum. Your reaction to my new familiar was unfitting for a person of your station and rank. Please keep your disapproval to yourself in the future." 

I can't see her face from where she's holding me, but I can feel something of her emotions and she seems like she's enjoying this. It takes me a moment to realize that she's talking louder than strictly necessary, loud enough to be heard by anyone nearby.

"regardless of your outdated believes of what is proper for a young lady of my station, you have no right to interfere in this. And really, trying to kick a demon, even a young one like this? They are born to fight, so you got what you asked for. Be happy I, despite surprising me completely like you did, suddenly lashing out like a man possessed, was enough in control to not let it actually hurt you."

That was her? How!

"Ladies and gents, I will excuse myself from your company. Please enjoy the remaining ceremonies, I may join you again later."

How does she make my claws dull? I really, really want to know! She drops me to the floor and starts walking towards some kind of tiered ramp, a staircase. I try to keep up and catch her eyes, occasionally letting out the same soft sound I used as hatchling to beg for food. I know she can see me and hear me, but she keeps ignoring me. I purposely try to tangle myself in her legs, but receive nothing but an accidental kick for my efforts. I think it's an accident at least. She stops in front of a wooden thing covering an opening in the wall, a door, and opens it by touching it in several places in quick succession. I go through before her and spot a platform at one side of the chamber. I jump on so I can more easily stare at her.

"You're going to be a handful, aren't you? I can tell, you know. A bit of what you feel. Not as much as you're supposed to sense me. Indignation, rage, fear and curiosity. Quite the potent mix."

Since she mentioned me sensing her, I prod the awareness I have of her. Some amusement but I stiffen when I sense what is underneath. An anger so strong yet so cold, it actually makes me shiver. I turn my eyes back on her. She was watching me and now she is smiling, predator stalks the prey.

"Now we understand one another, get off the desk."

I look down at the wood I'm sitting on. This is a desk?

"Yes, that is a desk, now get off. The floor and the closet, that tall thing there, are fine. Not the bed, or under the bed, and not on the desk.

Can she hear what I'm thinking? I hop off quickly. I don't want to ignite that anger.

"You're just open and simple, like animals. Reading people is much harder."

There is a knock on the door and I hide myself under the desk. Everything is dangerous or trouble here. Maybe I can stay under the desk forever. The door opens and in comes yet another female carrying something. She also has yellow hair, but a darker yellow and she wears grey clothes. She looks a bit older, but it's hard to judge. She is also smiling, it is another 'superior' smile. I can sense the anger getting sharper from her and she is wearing her predator stalks the prey smile again.

With a soft thump the thing the one in grey was carrying is placed above me, on the desk. Then she talks to her in the usual gibberish. I'm trying to make sense of it, but there is barely anything I recognize. What I do recognize is her mood rapidly dropping until there is nothing left but anger. I hide under the desk as far away as I can. I expect roaring, screeching and violence to start any moment now, but the anger is constrained. I can feel it being held back and, as it does, it turns sharper and more solid. It's strange, being so aware of something other than me.

"Thank you for the tea and for your concern. I'll remind you that it is costumary to wait until given permission before entering. Since you've been my maid since my parents passed away, I'll let it slide. However."

I tense as I sense something coming. I'm not looking at the chamber anymore, focused solely in the sensations I can feel with my mind. The anger I sense is dissolving, turning into a storm. If it is giving me a headache, I wonder what it will do to her.

"Do not bring them up in this! I know they'd never wanted me to have a demon familiar, but they also didn't want to die and leave me to grow up alone! I know the stigma I carry now, I know what people think of demons, they think they and their owners are dangerous! If it keeps away one more of those vultures that have been circling me all these years, pecking away at what is rightfully mine, then it was worth it! I am not the little girl playing under the apple trees anymore. I haven't been for years, but you refuse to see!"

The other woman tries to say something. I wonder why she tries? Can't she tell the storm is far too strong to listen to little puffs of wind? Just as I think so, the storm solidifies again and the anger is a razor edge. My head hurts no less from it.

"I'm an adult now, with all the responsibilities, but you can't let me be one. Your insubordination is undermining my position. You should be advising me, not scolding me. I can't have that, even if your intentions are good, it shows a lack of respect. You will choose one of the girls to be my new personal maid and retire to the estate, or what is left of it, and manage the household until my return. You are dismissed."

Everything is silent. I peek out from under the desk in time to see the older woman turn around stiffly and leave the room. The door closes with barely a sound. Suddenly all the tension leaves the room. All the anger I sensed disappears and the resulting emptiness leaves me giddy. I sit down on the floor to stop from falling over and notice I'm not the only one. She is sitting on the floor, just staring at the door. I can't feel anything of her in my head and her eyes are strangely empty. Her face is wet and I wonder how that happens. I approach slowly and use one claw to poke her. No response. I get a little bolder and poke her face, but I still get no response. As I cautiously move closer she suddenly lunges at me and grabs me. I almost manage to dodge, but she catches my tail. Due to whatever thing that was done to me, she can hold it tightly without her fingers getting cut. I consider cutting off my tail in order to escape, I'm sure I can grow a new one, but hesitate. The hesitation costs me as she manages to grab a rear leg and pull me to her.

She takes me in a strong hold, pressed hard against her body, using her arms to crush me. There is more water, I think it's coming from her face. I can't breathe and start to struggle. Her only reaction is to grasp tighter and I can feel things popping inside. She is shaking, I think with the effort. I feel something snap in my back and lose the ability to struggle. Not long after things start to turn white. When I come to again, I let go of the ceiling in surprise and land hard on the floor.