Body was weightless, drifting in the darkness, a feather floating aimlessly to an unknown destination, if there even is a destination. Was a mirror in the distance, a very grand and extraordinary mirror out of arm's reach. Floating parallel to myself in the endless abyss. Able to make out a reflection, a reflection that did not belong to mine. A familiar young man stared back at me from the mirror within.

"We know each other..."

"Correct."

"But who are you?"

"Believe you know the answer."

"Me?"

"Yes. We are the same. Took you long enough to realize that. Thought being in a mirror made it more than obvious."

"How did I let this happen? I remember I was on the rooftop and I...I..."

"After failing to achieve anything of worth, began to wish upon others around to suffer the same fate as myself."

"No merit. Nothing to prove. No value. I am nothing but a disposable human left to be forgotten."

"Sure I may not be wrong about many things I have said. I, myself, still believe people who put themselves higher on the hierarchy than they actually belong are more common than others would think, but was that ever an excuse to slither on dirt? To stay at the bottom while continuing the resentment towards the world?"

"Humans are known to be adaptive, I told myself. Even with misery this is true. There are thousands and many people who adapted to their life surrounded by garbage and a lack of warmth. No desire to climb out of the pits of hell they fell in. They crawl, beg and do whatever they can to live another day. Yet I cannot help but wonder how such would happen in the first place."

"Perhaps I am on that path right now."

"Wake up to a day where I struggle to carry myself. Unable to find a reason to exist."

"And yet I cannot face death."

"Yes."

Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.

"Continue to search for the one thing in life that made it special, I felt it at some point, but struggled to find it. As though you had it in your hands but slipped away from your fingers. The tiny fragment of a memory still lurking inside."

"Unable to describe but recognize the scent."

"Sitting here waiting for it to finally fall into my hands, to be able to finally embrace it. Everything around moving ahead while I remain stationary."

"Me, blameless. That is what I truly believed. To consider the possibility that I was at fault. I was the one who caused myself to become this way. How could I comprehend?"

"Did I not consider the faults of my own actions? Once I had given up, that was when I pursued the easiest way to brighten my life. Reckless enjoyment of the most superficial that life has to offer. Quick jolts of joy to long stretches of days and weeks passing by with nothing to it. Eventually grew tired of what used to be considered fun. Now left empty. Everything seemed meaningless after."

"Not everything good happens to anyone. That does not mean we are allowed to let ourselves weaken, our bones to soften or to take comfort in misery. Yet I let exactly that happen. Refused to make...adjustments. Did not consider doing what was necessary to remedy the chaos I found myself in. Was all a simple matter of entitlement. As though the world owed me, responsible for the pain I had to endure. Did not realize that simple fact."

"Me, a sad child. To believe everything was acceptable simply because I accepted it. Yet I longed for the day when everything would be over. To go to bed forever, never to wake up again."

"What is the reason for all of this? For me to suffer until I had to face the monster that resides beyond? To face headfirst into the darkness of the permanent solution?"

"The monster can be two very different things."

"Explain."

"There is a permanent solution like you said, I do not believe that needs an explanation. But why have I not considered the other route? To grow from a small sprout to a blooming flower. To climb the high mountain through progression. To open the door that has not been turned."

"To better myself, is it?"

"Yes. That is what I should be doing."

"Where to start?"

"Grab an opportunity that is in your reach can be a start."

"Where would that be?"

"Should that not be obvious?"

"Accept Chris's offer?"

"Of course that is a start. Step out of what you find comfortable and usual, especially if it is not beneficial to stay for so long. Do not be afraid to explore, to discover what you have not already done so. Especially if staying in a single place is not helping so what is there to lose? What do I have to lose?"

"What else am I supposed to do?"

"Do not ask me everything. I only know as much as you do..."

The man in the mirror smiled benevolently as he waved what seemed like a parting as the mirror pulled itself away from me growing smaller and smaller as it absorbed into the darkness. When I began to think it was only me in the gravity absent space, I knew Elizabeth had appeared behind me.

"Good luck, Rob. I will miss you."