67TH GEAR - IT WAS A BACK-STABBING CANCER ALL ALONG

I almost had a heart attack when Vincent pointed at me. Now all eyes, including Gaylord, Lilith, and the entire Eaglecrest Club Members focused on the lone magicless student in the Saint Crusade Academy.

“Pffft! Wahahahaha!” Gaylord chuckled out loud like a dog who is about to puke. “That guy? That magicless human? How is he going to beat Lilith?”

I got slightly hurt by his mockery of me. Sure, I am magicless, but I got my guild proud of me. I broke Merry Knights’ record of notoriety. I even got a rookie into the Semifinals of the Regional Speedmage Tournament!

I clenched my fists and gritted with a smile. I took a step forward and looked Gaylord in his bloodshot vampiric eyes. Even though he has a killing aura on him, I will not be scared just because he is one of the most powerful magicians around.

“I am a coach and the navigator of Merry Knights. My name is Jonathan Wardenorth. I believe we’ve already introduced back in the tournament.”

“Oh, the son of Flint Wardenorth. The poor mutant did not inherit any of his parent’s magical genes. You are as powerless as you look, young one.” Gaylord smiled, revealing his fangs. “You know, a normal human like you has no right to even look at me in the eye.”

“You don’t scare me, you bloodsucking cocksucking piece of shit,” I said.

“Wahahahaha!” Gaylord laughed with his arms spread around. He flapped his coat and pressed his head towards me so that our foreheads are bumping each other. “Look at this tiny brat! He does not know his place! If my memory is right, you are that navigator we beat during the Semifinals! Seeing you frustrate yourself as you look at your helpless Speedmage struggle upon my Lilith’s might gives a smile to my face.”

“We will win next time! Yesterday's losers are tomorrow’s winners! Just because you got lucky winning the championship doesn’t mean that you can do it again!” I roared.

“Yesterday’s losers will stay as losers. That is all the reality of it. You can dream on, boy. But tell yourself once you woke up to reality and remind yourself that you are a loser, and you are helpless to do anything about it.”

“You…” I clenched my fist.

“You know why, Jonathan-boy? Do you know why you are helpless?” Gaylord snickered.

“W-Why?”

“Because you are born magicless. You are destined to be a failure. Deep in your heart, I know that you wanted to become a Speedmage. But you are unable to do so because you are powerless.” Gaylord glared.

“Shut up!”

“Be true to yourself. You just joined the Speedmage Tournament to escape reality. To have this illusion, a dream, a delusion, that you can play in the Triangle. It is your means of feeling what is around you, a way of coping with your inner defect.”

“Shut up!”

“You are frustrated that you cannot use any speed spells at all. You hated mages all your life, but the truth is, you are just envious of their talent. You wanted to be like them. You wanted to play like them. But unable to do so because of your pitiful wretched existence. You are just a pathetic cowardly loser who is making the people you’re coaching fight in your place.”

“I said shut up!” I closed my ears.

“Oh, did I hit the nail? Wahahaha!” Gaylord laughed.

“Y-You are wrong!” I roared.

Gaylord’s glowing crimson eyes stared at my soul. “I. am. Not. Wrong. You know it. You are frustrated with yourself. You know you could not win the tournament because you lack the most crucial thing of all: the experience of using speed spells! You are an idiot for even stepping into a school as prestigious as Saint Crusade Academy that is meant for mages!”

I fell to my knees and curled like an armadillo. I can see judging eyes on me. I can see laughing smiles at me. I can hear their curses, their disappointments, and their pity.

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I hate to say it, but it is true. Every time I set myself as a navigator and a coach, there is an inner desire in me that wanted to be the one doing the speed spells. I always project myself to the player I am navigating, whether it was Prez, Cruzo, or Flu. I always envied them for what they can do, but I have put aside those feelings to focus more on the game.

But the reality hit me when we lost the tournament. When Cruzo lost in the first round, I blamed myself. If only I was a better coach and navigator, I might have given him a win. When Ericka did a great fight against Vincent without my command, I realized that she might be better off playing without me.

When Flu was so helpless in her battle against Lilith and failed to get a single point, I blamed myself for being inexperienced.

If only I know a speed spell that could break off from Lilith’s Deadlock…

If only I was a mage who could properly teach Flu about speed spells…

If only I knew the countermeasures of Lilith’s tactics…

Flu would not have suffered.

All the things I taught to my Speedmages did not even come from me. It came from my father’s book. In reality, I have no contributions to their wins.

If only I was a mage like them, everyone would have done better.

I’m so frustrated with myself.

“When will you stop having the delusion of being a Speedmage Champion, Jonathan-boy?”

Gaylord Draculus has finally stabbed me with his finishing words right into my heart.

All my emotional wounds ever since I learned that I was magicless broke open. Pain shoots through my veins, my throat went dry, and it became harder to breathe. My heart aches like it was stabbed by a thousand knives without being torn apart.

I thought I’m already past this. I thought my self frustrations are already gone. But it was a back-stabbing cancer all along.

I can feel myself falling into a deep abyss made by my thoughts. I wanted to scream, to shout, to cry, but my mouth refused to move.

“Gaaah… haaaah… haaaah.” All I can do is pant out my frustrations. I hang my head as I felt sick.

But suddenly…

“Objection!”

I heard a familiar voice that destroyed the thoughts and words which are suffocating me. That same voice is the only light I can see in this dark abyss of frustrations. Startled, I looked up to see the source of this hope.

“I… I object to everything you just said!”

When my eyes regain their ability to perceive light, I saw a pink-haired girl’s back standing right in front of me. She stared right unto Gaylord’s bloodshot crimson eyes.

“Jonathan… is not that kind of person!” Flu’s shaking voice is full of rage and sadness.

“Fluonessia-girl,” Gaylord uttered in astonishment. “I did not expect you to appear in a blink of an eye.”

Gaylord’s scary irises are now targeted at Flu, but his facial expression remained cold and judging. Meanwhile, Flu is never backing down, even if she is in front of a scary vampiric duke. I admire Flu’s bravery in standing up like a true warrior.

“Flu!?” I uttered.

“I’m sorry, Jon. I overheard your conversation. I did not interfere because I do not want to be rude, but his insults have gone long enough!” Flu said, still not breaking her eye contact with the vampire. “I could not hold back anymore!”

“Oho?” Gaylord smirked. “Why are you angry, then?”

“You just said that Jonathan is having a delusion of being a Speedmage Champion, right? You could never be more wrong than that!” Flu shouted.

“But he is magicless. A magicless person can never be a Speedmage Champion or participate in a tournament.” Gaylord chuckled.

“And I am saying that you are wrong,” Flu said in a cold tone.

“Enlighten me then, Fluonessia-girl.” Gaylord shrugged his shoulders.

“Jonathan is already a Speedmage Champion for me! He was always there for every Speed Battle I took, every training I made, every win we celebrated, and every loss we lamented! He always gives it his all to make me a better Speedmage, this whole time! He spends every morning thinking of strategies and counters for our next opponents in the tournament!” Flu said.

“Flu…” I muttered.

“He never gave up on me, even though I was a failure as a Speedmage! He got it way harder than me whenever I lose! So take it back! Everything you said about Jonathan is not true!”

Flu’s words are full of guts and determination, something Cruzo would eventually cry for if he heard it. But it has given me the strength to get away from my abyss of frustrations.

Gaylord’s gaze is still as cold as possible. He is still calm, unwavering to the words Flu has just said.

“Fluonessia-girl… I am sorry I will not take my words back. I am a mature person and I would apologize if I was wrong, but I wasn’t. I am never wrong.” Gaylord smiled.

“...Why you…!” Flu gritted in anger.

“The fact remains that both of you are losers. I miss those sweet pitiful cries of yours, Fluonessia-girl when you realized that you are no match for my Lilith.”

“Ghhh!” Flu staggered as cold sweat ran down the side of her face.

I can’t stand it when Flu was being insulted. I know I just got depressed because of Gaylord Draculus’ words, but this is no time for me to cower in fear. I regained my strength and stood up tall.

“We will win,” I muttered.

“Huh?” Gaylord smirked in disbelief.

I clenched my fist and then spread it out pointing to Gaylord’s face. I scrunched my face and stared at the vampire’s magical eyes as bravely as I could.

“We may be crying right now, we may be envious right now, but mark my words, Gaylord Draculus. And you too, Lilith Nightshade. Yesterday’s winners are tomorrow’s losers too. Lilith may be the Regional Speedmage Champion, but I assure you… Fluonessia will be the National Speedmage Champion.”

Gaylord and Lilith were flabbergasted upon our bold proclamation. They never said a word.

I turned around and started to walk away.

“Let’s go, Flu. We have more important things to do.” I said.

“Yes, Coach!” Flu happily replied as she followed me.