Official meetings are held in the Heart, in the official Chamber or Law. It was a huge hall with a tall ceiling and terraced seating on three sides where interested parties or those waiting to participate could sit and observe. The Icanthie leadership and working officials involved in the proceedings had places along the back wall and that was where Kine, the Ruling Triangle, the High Warrior and her Firsts, the High Scholar and her Mentors and the High Healer and his Surgeons were seated when 0ur small party arrived.
They looked stern in their official robes but Kine caught my eye and I saw a flash of warmth. The need for secrecy meant that this was a closed meeting, and the huge, empty hall echoed every tiny sound. Though Lazot walked with us as a witness, I carried Seth. As his Legari I was his legal guardian and to give him over to another, here in the Chamber of Law, would imply either that I did not take my role seriously or I didn’t believe I could fulfil it. Mathias, as always in his Feline form, walked with us. I don’t think he had any evidence to give but few would argue with h1m when he clearly wanted to be here, especially when my guards had to remain outside.
We waited in the centre of the clear area before the Icanthie leaders who, at some unseen signal, began the proceedings.
“Lady Sierra. You are here to testify and give evidence concerning the supposed crimes of House Kuthar and disappearance of Lady Feenya of House Kuthar. You are named Legari to Lord Sethairoth of House Greer and a ward to the King. As such, you have royal protecti0n and all your records are sealed. Are there any other associations or rights you’d like to claim in this Chamber of Law?”
Kine had told me about this. Anything I said or did in the Chamber of Law would be taken as a formal declaration and would be judged there and then. If they found against the claimant, then they would be punished but if they found for the claimant, the new status or information would be confirmed in law. If I cla1med my Myath heritage, it could discount me from testifying because the Myath didn’t exist in Icanthie law. If I claimed House Kuthar, then my testimony would be viewed as an absent member of the House, because I’d never lived with them, and so given less weight.
“Leaders of the Icanthie Nation, I make no other claims at this time.”
A few eyebrows raised at my declaration but most seemed to expect it. They may know that I was a Myath from House Kuthar but, legally, they couldn’t see me that way right now.
“Very well. We understand that the evidence you wish to give is in the form 0f transferred memories. Do you need assistance with the procedure?”
“Thank you. I consulted Healer Amaya this morning and was advised that the best option for a group transference was to establish a shared mind space before initiat1ng the viewing. I have sent you each a connection and will begin once you are all ready.”
It took only a moment for everyone to connect and, once I was sure there were no problems, I released the package I’d prepared and initiated the memories. It continued a carefully constructed sequence beginning with mum's memories from her first confinement all the way to the end, my memories of that day and finally my encounter with my Uncle in the forest clearing. We had decided not to include the assassination attempt because there was not evidence to connect it to House Kuthar but it was still a lot of information. Amaya had assured me that the load was within safe limits and that it was better to d0 a single transfer rather than multiple, smaller sessions. Transference had become uncommon and was at risk of falling out of practice.
I’d managed to do a little mental acrobatics so that we were all observers to the memories rather than first person participants but I still hated watching it all again. So instead, I tried to focus on the details, things on the edges that I might have missed. Sort of squinting at the memory, I couldn’t be sure but it was possible that mum was tortured somewhere in the Heart. The feel of the rooms and the decor matched but, unless I saw the exact room, it was just a guess. I also tried to catch the faces of the staff she passed as she fled but it was almost like she deliberately blurred them. Maybe to protect them if she was caught or if I succeeded in sharing the memories. She always had a plan and memories were tricky things.
And then we came to my memories, finding mum and experiencing the transference. Burying her. Because they were mine, I found myself slipping back into first person though I managed to avoid complete immersion. Still, I felt the tears run down my face. Watching mum die, the agony on dad's face and knowing he would follow so0n after...
No words.
The shift to seeing my uncle manhandle Seth was jarring and pulled me back into an observation role. I swallowed my emotion and paid attention. Seeing the two memories of him so close together, he appeared very different. In mum's memories he was confident, arrogant even, frustrated yes but forceful and determined. In my memories, he was thin, worn, physically the same but an impression of emptiness about him and I had to wonder how his sister's ambitions affected him, or was it killing his own Kin that rubbed off some of the shine to his plans? Whatever it was, Uncle Quix looked ragged, on the edge. Despite everything it made me sad. Like something precious had been lost. I just don’t understand. His choices, his reasons...
The memories ended and I closed the link connecting us all. The vast hall that had been silent before was practically a vacuum now, just waiting to be filled. But not yet. For now we each absorbed the intense experience of the transference. Any transference had a profound affect, or so I was told, but these memories were harrowing. Horrific. They probably wouldn’t thank me for what we had witnessed here and I didn’t blame them.
Finally, one of the Ruling Triangle spoke up. I really should try to learn their names.
“Well... thank you for your testimony Lady Sierra. May I express my sorrow for your suffering and the loss of the widely beloved Lady Feenya.”
“Thank you. I am glad to be of service.” I was too. Despite how much this environment unsettled me, I was glad that they took mum's death and the problems of House Kuthar seriously.
“From what we have witnessed, there is certainly enough evidence to warrant further investigation.”
Another spoke up. “Mmmm” he agreed, “But I’m not sure about this request to confine all of House Kuthar until each individual can be cleared. You have evidence against Lord Quix Kuthar but little to nothing to implicate Lady Wistra or the rest of the House. Lady Sierra, I understand you have all of Lady Feenya’s memories and it was she who first raised questions of treason and danger. What else can you tell us?”
“Sir, I am sorry to say I can offer nothing else. I do not access any of her memories that she did not intend to give me. Not only would it be a breach of privacy, but I also believe it would be unwise. Healer Amaya feels that the memories are tangled, unstructured and could be dangerous.”
I could see they wanted to argue but, thankfully, Kine jumped in.
“Ruler Ether. Feenya's other memories may not be necessary. We have gained further evidence since I requested this meeting, which I have sent you all. It is a recording of an interview with a member of House Kuthar, under a Truth Sayer. I believe it implicates Lady Wistra and proves the need to act swiftly and decisively. I know confining and investigating a whole House is extreme, but I believe it necessary.”
Again, the chamber went quiet as the Icanthie leaders viewed Echos testimony, but all I could see was my petite cousin as we escorted her back to the Jungle Habitat. She didn’t want me to come, in case we were observed, putting us both in more danger. But I couldn’t leave her to go back into that Snargle pit alone. We’d traveled swiftly on the grav-line, hiding in crowds to lose any followers. It was a quiet and tense journey and when we arrived, she didn’t want to say goodbye, so we’d stood awkwardly together in the midst of my guards until, finally she grabbed me in a rib cracking hug before fleeing into the tropical foliage. The last I saw of her was her little Jaguarundi tail disappearing into the shadows of the undergrowth.
This had to work. I’m not sure how long my relatives could survive if Aunt Wistra continued on like this. I didn’t know many of my kin, but I had brief flashes of faces and names, unsure if they were my memories or mum's. Sound stirred again as the recording ended and they shuffled in their seats.
“This is troubling.”
The High Warrior spoke. “Indeed. But if this is true, as well as the tampering King Kine found in the Systems, we must act.”
They each looked to one another and nodded their agreement. It seemed they had consensus. Ruler Ether turned back to me.
“Thank you for your evidence. You will be called to testify at the official trial once the investigation is finished and arrests made. That is all for today.”
I bowed my head in acknowledgment and turned to walk out of the chamber. Lazot was next to testify so we’d agreed that I’d wait in the hall with the guards until he was done. Now I had to figure out what to do for the rest of the rotation which we had to spend in the Heart. Perhaps we could find the room that might have held mum...
Lazot hadn’t been long and joined us quickly, offering to take us on a tour but conversation had quickly turned to more dangerous territory. Eecee was in a temper and stomped a little as we walked through the few public areas of the Heart.
“Where do the extremist purists even get their ideology from? It's not religious. It’s certainly not scientific. I don’t get it.”
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“Eecee, we should not be discussing this here, we don’t know who may be listening.” Kaylor admonished.
Casual mental communication was blocked in the Heart for security reasons so we couldn’t get the privacy we were used to when we wanted to converse in public. Lazot quickly ushered us into another part of the Heart and I recognised it as Kine's suite where we’d briefly stayed before. If I remembered correctly, it was soundproof.
“Sorry everyone. I know better than that. I guess I’m too used to the security at the mansion.”
“I think we’re safe, I didn’t see or sense anyone. But what do you mean Eecee? Extremist purist, where did that come from?” I asked.
Merrick explained. “It’s a well known fact that three, maybe four of the major Houses have purist tendencies. They like to keep things within their Houses, only make alliances with so called “good bloodlines” and don’t approve of diplomatic relations with other races.“
Kaylor continued. “Out of those Houses, some become extremists in their views. Those are the ones whose members tend to go on “hunts” for those who don’t “belong” in Icanthie territory. But it’s all rubbish, just an excuse if you ask me.”
“It’s about power. They believe their abilities are the most powerful and want to keep it that way. Or they want to be the most powerful. Either way, they have to be in control and ensure no one surpasses them. But it’s all an illusion. We can’t even predict what Feline form an individual will take. It’s completely random irregardless of family or environment. But they have to have some control and the only thing we know is that abilities are at least somewhat genetic so that’s the aspect they control as much as possible.” Merrick answered. He was becoming more comfortable and talkative lately.
“Same old same old.” I muttered.
“It makes sense. They don’t necessarily believe the pure stuff but they use it to maintain control. It would also explain why they hate the Myath so much. The Myath represent those who broke their rules and a whole population outside of their control. They have no way of knowing if a Myath will be more powerful than them. It’s probably also why Myath are denied a chance for maturity.”
I let the rest of the discussion wash over me as I contemplated this new information. Controlling information was an old method of gaining power, it's part of the reason I kept information about the Myath so quiet. We needed our secrets to survive. Like the inability to mature, while a common assumption, is not... entirely... accurate. Groaning internally I sagged against the nearest wall with a small sigh. There are so many secrets that aren’t mine to tell but I desperately want to confide in my new family. So much of my life, and myself, I’m holding back because I don’t want to betray those who still rely on me. I feel like I’m living a double life.
My guards went off to check all the rooms in Kine’s suite but Lazot and I relaxed into the soft cushions. The transference had taken a lot out of us, both mentally and emotionally but the same could not be said for Seth who was full of energy and busy hunting soft cushions. I watched happily as he pounced on a cushion, biting and shaking it. Lazot had been accompanying him in his Feline form and taking him to explore and Seth had been spending time with his Greer cousins that were of similar age. He was flourishing.
I must have been more tired than I thought because, as I watched, Seth seemed to blur. I blinked to clear my eyes and suddenly, a tiny little Warrior stood in front of me. I froze, and felt Lazot do the same.
“Is that...?”
Lazot nodded.
“Did he just....”
Lazot nodded again, a grin spreading across his face. Laughing joyously, he leapt up, sweeping Seth, now in his Warrior form, into his arms and swinging him around in circles. He’s shifted. Seth’s first conscious shift. I jumped up laughing too and joined the pair in a three way hug, praising him. And then it got better.
“Si-si Ra Ra! Papa!”
I admit, I might have let out a little squeal of delight at Seth’s first words!! I was so proud of him and it was obvious Lazot was too.
“Mathias. Mathias! He said his first words! He shifted!! Look!”
I dragged Mathias over as soon as he reentered the room, grinning happily and squeezing him around the neck as I watched Seth and Lazot practicing walking in his new form. I’m so happy. It’s perfect.
“Sierra, we should visit the Healer. We need to log this and make sure everything went well. My son shifted!”
We laughed together and hugged each other again. The guards, having finished their search and secured the suite, were drawn back by our happy, excited noise.
“Sorry guys, looks like it’s another trip out to the Healer. Come on!”
***
Amaya finally finished her long list of check ups as Lazot hovered over her shoulder. His life mate, Simeon, worked in the Heart and had joined us when Lazot called him. He watched Lazot indulgently, a satisfied small on his lips. I’d spent a little time with him but though it's not much, he’d always been kind. He was a gentle, quiet sort and the ghostly bond I felt through Lazot confirmed it. I liked him and he made Lazot happy.
“You know, I don’t think I’ve been to the Healer so much in my entire life than I have in the last two moons. You’re going to get sick of seeing me Amaya, and this time I’m not even the patient!”
She snorted in amusement but kept her attention on Seth as he roamed around the Healers Hall. It was the same one we’d first visited when we’d arrived.
“Why’s that? Don’t the Myath have Healers?” Lazot asked, momentarily distracted from his hovering and proud attention for his son. He gaze thoughtfully at me and I realised that I hadn’t talked much about my life before all this. Not much anyway.
“We do, of a sort. The Myath have extensive knowledge or archaic basic medicine. We use plants for their healing properties and techniques such as bandaging, splinting broken bones and stitching severe wounds. We have some natural healing but it’s not as extensive as the other races.”
“Stitches and splints!?” Amaya finally looked up, incredulity all over her face. She seemed to try and wrap her head around that before snorting, half amused, half incredulous and went back to studying her screen as she shook her head.
I turned to Mathias, Lazot and Simeon. Kine was still in the big meeting, but I’m sure they’d fill him in later. Or maybe now seeing as the door opened and the King came striding in, a grin on his face.
“I hear we have some wonderful news. Lazot, Simeon, congratulations!” Kine said as he lifted Lazot, literally, off the floor in a hug.
I laughed to see the proper, usually quiet Lazot being squeezed in a powerful hug and the glimps of Simeon discreetly backing away. He was quite shy around bigger groups. I’m not sure how close they were before, but Kine and Lazot had become very firm friends despite the age difference. And all of a sudden, I began to feel a little morose, my smile slipping from my face.
Age was a strange thing because it differed among the races. So the concept of adult and child, middle age and old age varied radically. All of the races could expect to live to around 500 orbits but that was the only similarity. Except for the humans but no one talked about them. No one knew how old Myath lived to because they mostly died of unnatural causes, if anyone bothered to consider it at all. So, because of this radical variation, each race marked the transitions in their life by specific events, like first words, first shift and maturity...
I may never never shift, may never go through maturity, may never have celebrations at the landmarks in my life. Watching the celebrations for Seth’s achievement, I realised for the first time just how much I really wanted it, not as some, “one day” or abstract possibility. I wanted my maturity and a celebration with my kin and friends, to make Kine and Mathias proud and find to the Feline shape that would be mine. Maybe I’d be a little Ocelot or a Jaguarundi like my cousin.
“We can find out, if you’d like.” I jumped a little at the voice. Had I been speaking out loud?
Mathias stood close in his Warrior form, staring down at me. “It’s all over your face Sierra.” I frowned in question. “Longing.”
I huffed and turned away but he caught my arm and turned me back around, crouching a little to look me in the eyes.
“Tell me what you’re thinking. I may be telepathic but I’m not a mind reader.” He joked gently.
Kine had noticed us and surreptitiously made his was over, steering us into a private room.
“Sierra, what is it?”
They waited patiently as I tried to gather my thoughts. I cleared my throat that had clogged with emotion.
“I thought... that she was coming to help me through my maturity... I was too young when she dropped off Seth. With the danger we were all in, I was giving up hope, consigning it to childhood dreams. Without anyone to guide me through it... But then her communications said she be with us soon and she promised to try. When we found her, I knew I’d lose them both and I needed to put Seth first...”
“So, you expected to go through maturity at some point. Are you afraid something will happen to prevent it again, that you’ll lose Mathias and I?”
I shook my head.
“You don’t trust us.” Mathias stated and my head shot up.
“That’s not true Mathias. I know I can trust you and Kine. But...secrets don’t stay secrets long when you start telling people. And I know you both will love and care for me no matter what but what do we do when we can’t trust the guards anymore? Or the staff or whoever else we rely on? I can’t endanger you both. I won’t!”
“Sierra, what could be so terrible that you would give up maturity to prevent things that may never happen?”
Kine waited for an answer, but I couldn’t risk it. So Mathias decided to take another route.
“My father had a lover. He loved his mate, my mother, but he also loved this woman. Lovers are rare for mated individuals because a mating can be dissolved fairly easily, unless its political, which my parents wasn’t despite him being King. So my father's lover was a shock to everyone. Some doubted it was true, because she was never seen but I knew it wasn’t a rumour. She lived in a locked wing of our mansion. No servants, she looked after herself. They had a child, my brother, but before he was even two orbits old, they both disappeared. My father never spoke of them. I never met them but I felt a kin bond with my brother, weak and distant, but there, and I made sure to nurture it and help it grow as much as I could. The rumours never went away but no one spoke of them in our House. I always suspected that she was of another race or maybe even Myath. Either way, my brother was probably Myath. All my life, all my rein as King, I searched for them but I never found anything. Until I met you. Do you understand Sierra? Kin is kin. Not matter what. My greatest sorrow was that I never found and knew my brother. My greatest joy was the day I found you and each one I get to spend with you. If you understand nothing else, knows this. Do not let secrets deprive you, it will only make you miserable.”
Kine looked dumb struck and I felt the same. So this was how I was related to them. I heard Kine whisper to himself, broken and in pain, “I had another uncle?”
Mathias grabbed his shoulder to offer comfort but never took his eyes off me. I need to decide. I could see the desperation in his eyes, willing me to confide in them, desperate for any answers I might have. I had to decide!
“She... she was human.” I let that sink in. A hated human, the destroyers, the reckless, nearly ended the world in a technological catastrophe. Forever consigned to be the villains of history and the present. If anyone ever found out...
“Human?”
Still, our eyes remained locked as I nodded. Slowly, haltingly, I told one of my secrets.
“Someone came close to finding them. Grandfather... didn’t want to but decided to send them away... to keep them safe. But she knew it wasn’t enough. So she left the house he arranged for them and joined the Myath. She changed their identities... everything she could think of to keep us all safe.”
Mathias swallowed and blinked, lowering his head to rest against mine. Kine, in a numb sort of voice asked, “How did they meet in the first place? Humans don’t leave the human kingdom, as far as I know.”
I sighed. “Human refugees have been fleeing the human Kingdom for decades. The King has lived a very long life, perhaps unnaturally, I don’t know. But it’s turned him stark raving mad. Maybe he was already mad, or maybe it’s illness but, whatever the reason, conditions there are horrendous.”
“They’d have to be to risk encountering the other races. It’s not safe for them outside their borders. Most would kill on sight.”
“Exactly. We can’t risk this. To go through maturity, my medical records, including my genetic data, will need to be analysed. They find out I’m part human and you will be in danger for protecting me.”
A silence fell on us as we each considered the options. I knew this would be a problem. They wouldn’t want to abandon me but accepting me with a human Ancestor would be dangerous and would inflame the already unstable Houses. A lot of people had sympathy and even affection for the Myath. No one had sympathy for the humans.
“I’m willing to give up the chance for maturity if it means protecting you both and the rest of our kin.”
And that was that. End of discussion.
“... I don’t ... want you to have to give up maturity Sierra. I am not ashamed. I loved my brother and I love you. If this is your only objection, then there is no reason not to go through maturity.”
I stared at Mathias and ended up laughing in exasperation. I couldn’t argue with him, but what did Kine think? This would probably affect him more as King. I didn’t even get the chance to ask. He enveloped me in a hug and his rich deep voice washed over me.
“We will all protect each other, but we do not hide. Mathias is right. There is no shame. No fear. You tell us when, and we’ll be there to guide you through your maturity Sierra.”
I hugged him back and felt Mathias enclose us all in his arms from behind. Happy, relieved tears fell on Kine’s shirt. I pulled back and sniffed.
“We should get back. It's Seth’s big day and Amaya will probably want to kick us all out of her Healers Hall soon. Beside, we have a lot to talk about, including the meeting.”
“That can wait, let’s celebrate. While we’re here, do you want Amaya to check your records and see if we need anything special for your maturity.”
I hummed. “Hhmmmmm. I like Amaya but I’d prefer to wait until we get home and have Darius do it. Is that okay?”
“Of course. I’m sure he’ll be delighted. Now neither Mathias nor I are mated but we can get my sisters and your aunts to help out with it all. The Den family is spread out all over the place but some stay in The Capital.” He saw my concerned look. “Don’t worry, they’ll love you. On the other hand, you might want to kill them by the end of the moon. I feel like that frequently.”
“That’s only because you're so busy with state matters and I’m secluded in my tower. We’ve gotten too used to being alone that the rabble of the Den family is foreign to us. It will be good to have more cubs around.” Mathias rumbled.
I laughed as they bantered back and forth about the family, feeling a peace I hadn’t for a long time.