With how tired I felt, I thought it must be late in the afternoon but when I emerged from the Confinement Hall, the sun had barely reached its zenith. This meeting had taken a lot out of me emotionally but somehow, I felt a little lighter. Uncle Quix… I don’t know but I guess time would tell. I’d be there to help if I could, though I’m not sure if he’d welcome me again.
I made my way back to Kine’s mansion, pondering the visit and what I’d do for the rest of the rotation. I hadn’t seen my guard team since we got back and I missed them. Perhaps I’d check in on them as they took their rest time, but then again, they may not wish to see me considering it was the first rest they’d had in moons and all those moons had been spent in the same company.I was confident I had a really good working relationship with them but, thinking about it, I wasn’t sure about their personal feelings towards me. Of the group, I’d only really formed a more personal friendship with the twins Eecee and Kaylor and young Merrick. I’d send Eecee and Kaylor a message to see how they were and to ask if the others would welcome a word or two.
Kine’s mansion was close, and I quickly sought its shelter. At first, I wanted to go to my rooms and collapse but I felt out of sorts, jittery and unsettled so, at the last moment, I decided to go to the lower study that opened onto the gardens. It was a quiet and peaceful place, full of desks and low cushions, antiques and even some physical records. It was little used as Kine had his own main office as well as various work areas in each suit of rooms so it was perfect for how I felt right now. I closed the door behind me and lowered myself onto the most comfortable cushioned seat I’d ever seen and closed my eyes.
“MEL, play Chopin Nocturne in C minor on Violin (AH) from my private library please. Audio only. Immersive volume.”
MEL didn’t respond, one of the least vocal of the BOOAD’s iterations, designed to seamlessly facilitate entertainment. Acknowledging every command would be counterproductive to immersion so the music simply started without warning. Now that I could shift forms, I’d remembered to adjust the volumes settings on all my personal files otherwise the immersive volume I’d requested would have been painful. The music from long ago engulfed me at a volume just loud enough to encompass my entire attention, blocking out my immediate location and transporting me to a dreamscape of my minds creation. I just listened and let myself feel…
The music swelled and ebbed, drawing out then flitting around me and I breathed through the roiling emotions, letting them dance with the music, living a life of their own. Images came and went, of mum, of Quix, some too fast to identify but scorching me with fresh emotions as they whipped by. Pain, sorrow, anger, hope. The music filled me and drew out everything from deep within, like a sponge drawing moisture. It swelled and swelled but had no where to go leaving me feeling like I couldn’t contain anything else, full and ready to burst. I wanted to cry. I wanted to smile. Emotions swirled in me, tangled in one messy knot before something seemed to reach inside me a lift everything out, finally fading with the last strings. Quiet settled on me and I just felt it, soothed by the peace.
The sounds of the garden drifted into my consciousness, rustles and chirps, life going about its business or living completely ignorant of the significance to me of the last few moments. Just as it should be. I felt like I’d stepped back from the precipice and avoided the long fall into a darker place, but some of those emotions lingered, always there. But that was okay. Emotions, no matter how high or low, were better than feeling nothing.
A footstep quickly followed by the quiet click of the door opening alerted me to company and snapped me out of the meditative quiet I had fallen into with the ending of the music. Rather than get up, I rolled my head on the plump cushion behind me and peeled my eyes open just a little to squint at the person by the door, and smiled at him.
Kine stood by the door, a complex expression on his face, which the bond only clarified a little. He held himself still, tail and ears relaxed yet he didn’t enter as I would expect. From our bond, he was concerned yet happy with an odd effervescent mood I couldn’t really place. I blinked lazily and sent a feeling of invitation through our bond, too immersed in my quiet mood to feel like talking yet. Kine must have received it because he slowly glided into the room, closing the door behind him and easing down onto my cushion. I closed my eyes again, nearly falling back to a zoned out state. We sat like that, just existing close together before, eventually, Kine broke the silence.
“Are you alright Sierra?” He asked quietly, almost tentatively.
It took me a moment to register what he meant, and my morn with Uncle Quix slid across my mind. I rolled my head towards Kine and I opened my eyes, smiled and nodded. Kine inspected me closely.
“I hadn’t realised you were back yet or I would have come to see you. Are you sure you’re alright? Only, you didn’t tell anyone you were back and you came here instead of your suite to play music. I’ll give you space if you need it but I just wanted to check. I know seeing Quix must have been difficult for you…”
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I could see and hear the concern in Kine’s voice now but rather than reassure him immediately, I was distracted by his comment.
“… Kine… how did you know I was playing music?”
A chuckle escaped him and the concern leeched away from his expression as I watched.
***
Kine felt the hard knot in his chest ease as his cousin finally spoke. He’d been distracted all morn, worried about how Sierra would cope when facing her Uncle. Then, out of the blue, a strange yet beautiful piece of music had sounded throughout the mansion. He wasn’t the only one startled and it had taken him a few moments to get his tail fur to lie flat again.
Kine decided to tease his cousin a little, now that he was reassured somewhat. “The automatic settings for MEL mean that any entertainment is broadcast to the entire mansion. After I made sure my heart was still functional, I asked MEL to track the source and came here to find you.” Kine paused to watch the bashful look on Sierras face before resuming, his teasing tone falling away to be replaced by concern again. “I wasn’t sure if I should disturb you or not.”
He trailed off there, the question implied rather than outright asked. Sierra would talk to him when she was ready and until then, Kine could be patient.
***
Embarrassment flushed through me as I realised I’d blasted music, very loudly, through the whole mansion. All the guests, residents staff and guards, would have heard it… and likely knew that she was the source if they had pursued their curiosity as Kine had. I wanted to curl into myself and hide behind my tail but before I could act on my impulse, Kine’s teasing tone switch again to concern. I felt more like myself again so decided I could talk about my meeting a little.
“Meeting Uncle Quix was… tiring… but… okay I guess. I’m not sure we’ll even get on with each other but I opened the door and took the first step. Where it goes from here will depend on both of us. Time will tell.” I paused, trying to evaluate my feelings. “It wasn’t a pleasant meeting but it feels good to have done it. He was surprisingly calm and receptive, but it did stir up a lot of memories and feelings. That’s why I played the music, to try and help me through the emotions. I’m sorry to have disturbed the mansion Kine. I promise I won’t make the same mistake again, I’ll check the settings before I play entertainment again. Though why it’s automatically set to broadcast like that I don’t know. It seems odd to me.”
Kine chuckled gain, his amusement obvious. “It’s a setting designed to prevent younglings from consuming inappropriate entertainment. The systems must still have you flagged as not matured, though I can’t imagine why. Your medical records are up-to-date so everything should have updated with them. I’ll look into it.”
“Thanks Kine.” My thoughts briefly lit on Healer Roake and what he may have done but I stopped myself before I got angry. I can’t assume the worst and judge him, it’s better to let Kine find the facts and go from there. Roake may have betrayed my trust and shown his biases, but he was generally a good person and had ethics. He probably wouldn’t have tampered with my records. It was probably a glitch due to my odd status…
“I’m glad you’re okay and that the meeting was… not the worst experience for you.” Kine stumbled over that. His consideration warmed me and I smiled, resting my head on his shoulder. “Would you like to stay here or join me in my suite? You can tell me all about that odd music you played. I like it.”
I pondered his invite and decided I’d wallowed enough for the rotation. Popping up from the cushion with more energy that I had to spare, I turned and held out my hand to pull my big cousin up. “You know, I have thousands and thousands of files like that… wanna know how I got them?”
Kine took my hand and I pulled, trying to get him to stand but he resisted me. “…I think I’d like to listen to them more than I want to know where you got them.” Kine commented and he grinned at my attempts to haul him up.
“We can do both! But I thought you wanted to go to your suite…” I grumbled good-naturedly, failing to hide my grin at our play. Kine finally allowed me to pull him up, standing suddenly and nearly sending me onto my tail. I righted myself and readjusted my grip on his hand, turned and dragged him, half resisting, to the door, chattering as we went.
“Most Myath stay in the same community their whole lives, some move from one to another because of disputes or relationships but mostly the different communities stay the same. My Dad and I weren’t like that. Part of being the leaders meant we had to regularly check in with every group as well and the scouts who made sure travel and camp sites were still secure. But even then, with prolonged stays with each group, we had a lot of time where we weren’t needed. It’s hard to integrate into a groups you’re not with for long periods of time, so Dad and I would explore the unseen places and even the Wilds.”
“Are they extremely dangerous? The Wilderness, the Wilds, even the uninhabited places in the different Monarch Nations are places we don’t go to for a reason. How did you survive?” Kine questioned, tone more curious than concerned. I was here so obviously, I’d survived.
“It’s not as dangerous as you think. You just have to know the land, the territories and dangers. Knowing is half the battle, the rest is being careful and knowing when to retreat. Anyway, Dad and I often disappeared for ages and we’d search from anything that interested us, either personally or for the sake of the Myath.” I stopped on the stairs and turned to face Kine, my wonder must have been evident in my sparkling eyes. “There are places from the ancient days, still there underground. Amazing frozen glimpses of the past. I wish you could see some of them Kine, it’s like nothing you’d ever dream of.” I could feel the excited grin stretched across my face but I couldn’t help it. I turned back and continued dragging Kine along. “There’s always so much to find but I love the music file the most, closely followed but the written fictions. I collected them every time we visited…”
I trailed off again, this time a little sad that I’d never explore new or familiar ruins with my Dad again. I’d only been to two since he’d died and it wasn’t the same, through still amazing. Kine distracted me.
“Do you only have the files of is there context too?” He asked and I could see the familiar curiosity and excitement I’d seen on Dad’s face whenever we’d find a new artefact. I’m sure the same look often painted my own face.
“It’s different each time. Actually, this one has a visual file too but I didn’t play it this time. I’ll show you later!”
We’d nearly reach Kine’s suit, so I let go of his hand and calmed a little, no longer caught up in the excitement of history. We climbed the stairs to his rooms but, as we drew closer, I suddenly felt a presence and my bond with Kine hummed with it. Someone was in Kine’s room, he had company… oh!
I stopped outside his door, unsure if I should go in or give Kine and his guest some privacy, despite that fact Kine had invited me and even come to get me himself. As I hesitated, Kine laid his hand on my back and a welcoming warmth engulfed our bond. Looking up at him, I smiled quietly and looked back at the door. I guess I was going in…