Chapter 58: Yoga, Relations, and Dialog

“Flexibility is key,” Tess told us as we were put through our paces. Personally, I was relieved. When Tess had said ‘training’ I’d envisioned, well, torture to put it mildly. Instead, we got yoga, thank the Mother, and Bless her Roots!

Thanks to this new body of mine, I could actually touch my toes for the first time in, I don’t want to know how long. As she led us through some beginning routines, I was smart enough not to question the workout. Maldyn wasn’t. I was just happy there wasn't a goat.

“This is the training?” he said with a smirk. “You had me worried for no reason.”

“Quiet!” I hissed to Maldyn, but it was too late.

“Oh, is that right?” I knew that evil look on Tess’s face, and I wanted to kick Maldyn in the gooseberries.

“I have heard, or rather read, about something similar,” Magali said. He was smart enough to know we were headed for trouble and looked to distract. “There is a religious order, the Willow Tree Monks, that practice stretching techniques as a form of meditation. It’s said to harmonize body and spirit.”

Tess speared Maldyn with her gaze a moment longer, then faced Magali with a smile. “This is the same. It limbers the body, strengthens muscles, and promotes steady breathing. all things you need in a fight."

“Ha! I thought we’d be lifting sandbags or swinging weighted sticks at each other.”

I closed my eyes, groaning silently.

“Oh, we’ll get there, never fear,” came the overly sweet response.

I feared.

This might seem like a bit of a backslide, Tak and myself having done some basic weapons training with Kolin’s Team as per our deal. Magali already had some staff training and Paytin never had enough free time to visit Team Brawn’s little bungalow on Guilded Row, with Maldyn not being a part of the arrangement. With the Team on assignment, the training now fell to Tess as the physical trainer of our co-op.

As a former athlete, she relied on the more modern training style she had been taught. The elves had a long tradition of military and adventurer training, but they haven’t evolved the science of it like on Earth. This started with preventing injuries, and not beating on each other with weighted sticks. Thus, stretching and Yoga.

“Preparing your body for its best performance will lead to much greater gains in the future. Don’t worry, we will alternate yoga with strength training. The better shape a person is in, the healthier they will be, and that is all we are looking for at the moment. At least for you guys, anyway. Maybe shed a few pounds, eh Maldyn?”

The elf’s face turned beet red, whether from anger or shame, I couldn’t tell.

“Tak and I will be doing more intense workouts, along with weapons work. Granted, we don’t have the same apprenticeship requirements that you do—Book and Magali that is, but did I hear that you quit your day job, Maldyn?”

“Uh, umm…”

“So you are most welcome to join us.” Tess’s tone was sweet enough to drip saccharin.

He was saved from comment with the entrance of another of our party.

“Book, there you are…oh, hi everybody.” Gaelia swept into the backcourt, a quartet of clinking bottles clutched against herself. She seemed self-conscious, being the center of all our attention. “Did I interrupt?”

“Nah, all’s good,” I told her, trying to put her at ease. “Are those for my Master?”

“Yes,” she said, looking from me to the bottles and back to me. “Master Tounsel thought to save the cost of a [Courier], so he asked me to bring them to you.”

“Ha, been there. Nothing like using an apprentice to run errands, save a copper or two.” I knew; I’d done it more than once for Master Alric. In fact, that is how I met Tak for the first time. She still wasn’t back from seeing her father, and I hoped she was OK.

“Hey, I resent that as a fellow [Courier].”

“Oh, oh Tess, I’m sorry…” Gaelia was flustered, poor girl.

“Just busting your balls, Gaelia.”

“Busting my…what?”

“Don’t ask!” we chorused at the confused young woman, causing her to jump a little. I felt bad for her.

“Gaelia, did you hear? Did you?” Maldyn’s glee saved the moment for her.

“Yes, Maldyn, I did.” Ah, the long-suffering tone of someone familiar with Maldyn’s antics. “Have you told your uncle yet?”

Ooh, that deflated him—he-he.

//Don’t giggle, it’s unbecoming//

‘Should I guffaw?’

“And if you plan on telling him at family dinner on Nine-day, let me know so I can skip it.”

This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it

What’s this? Gaelia, Maldyn, and dinner?

“Uh,” Maldyn scratched at the back of his head, looking sheepish. “I thought if I brought that lemon cake he loves so much, it might smooth things over. Besides, he is used to me being a disappointment, cousin.”

Cousin?!

“Like Uncle Tounsel won’t tell him first.”

Enough. “OK, I have to ask. Cousins? Uncles?”

“Yes.”

“That’s right.”

“Tess, help?” I was confused, Magali wasn’t surprised, and Tess… probably didn’t care, so I looked at her.

“What Book is trying to ask is, are you two related?” Tess’s smirk was unnecessary, I thought.

“We are cousins, so what?” Maldyn on the defense.

“In-law. Cousins-in-law, Maldyn.” The guy looked offended that Gaelia felt the need to point it out. “After my dad died, Mom married into the Bester family. Galen, my stepdad, is the youngest of four brothers: Tounsel, the oldest and my Master; Rowld, Maldyn’s father; and Ponce, who took in Maldyn when his father left them.”

“Disappeared,” Maldyn grumbled quietly.

“Of course, I ‘m sorry.”

Wow, we are talking six degrees of…whoever that old actor was.

“So your step-uncle is brother to Maldyn’s uncle; that had to help with this building, huh?”

“It didn’t hurt,” Maldyn admitted.

“And Tounsel is an old team member of Master Alric’s, along with Mr. W., Tak’s dad…”

“Harms,” Magali helpfully supplied.

“And that [Healer] who fixed me up. Is there anybody related to her that I should know about?” Family circus, ha!

//Why-oh-why do I have to be the only one subjected to these quips?//

‘Because you live rent-free in my head, that’s why.’

//My mental suffering isn’t ‘free’//

‘Ditto.’

“Wait…Magali, please don’t tell me Paytin is part of this twisted family tree.”

“Ha, no, Book. She is my cousin.”

“What…Really?!”

“No.”

“Oh, haha, very funny.”

“Dude, he got you,” so Tess thought it was funny, but whatever.

“Don’t families tend to cluster where you are from?” asked Gaelia. “I would think in a small village, relations would be even closer.”

“Yeah, I suppose so,” I covered, with Tess being too busy laughing. “I guess I thought it would be different in the”—I couldn’t help the grin—“big city.”

“Poor country mouse,” Magali said, using Paytin’s nickname for me.

“Alright, listen up!” Tess clapped her hands twice. “Now the history lesson is over, Gaelia stash those bottles somewhere, then come back and take a spot on the cobbles. It’s time to get back to work.”

Groans all around.

“And Maldyn? Tomorrow you can start filling up those sandbags.”

“Why me?” he whined.

“Because, dumb-ass,” I told him. “You are the one who opened his big mouth.”

“Fine. Now, where is Gaelia?”

She’d gone into the house to set aside her burden of my Master’s elixir. I really wanted to ask her about it, what it was for and everything. Surely, once we all moved in and became official roommates, I’d be able to get something out of her.

//Way to respect boundaries//

‘You are telling me that?’

About the time I too wondered when Gaelia would return--exercise soonest begun was soonest done—, damn, I really am full of the cliched quips. An old soul in a young body.

//Geezer//

‘I prefer retro; Classic Coke.’

//How original, yet another 80’s reference//

'Like I said, Classic Coke. Change the formula and things go all FUBAR.'

“Hey guys, look who I found,” Gaelia was back with two others in tow.

Tak firmly strode through the door after her, shoulders back and head high, with Paytin sliding quietly in behind her.

“The gang’s all here,” I said, before remembering we were still one short. I shot Tess an apologetic look, knowing how much she missed Kolin. “How did it go with your father?”

“Not terrible,” Tak blew out a big sigh. “We talked; I told him about our little co-op and fixing up the building. He seemed relieved when I told him I had a good place to rest my head—as he should, after kicking me out. He told me I could pick up as much work as I wanted, to help pay for renovations. Basically, a ploy to keep me working and away from adventurer training.”

“Sorry, Tak.” Magali showed his long-time understanding of the relationship Tak had with her dad. I’m sure it made him happy for his own relationship with his.

“So, no go on the equipment?” I asked.

“I was afraid to ask outright, but I dropped plenty of hints that he ignored.” Tak was frustrated to the point of anger.

Meanwhile, Paytin had settled herself against one of the brick walls separating the courtyard from the alley running behind it, with Stormy appearing out of nowhere to curl up in her lap. All this talk and thought of fathers made me wonder about Paytin’s, but now wasn’t the time.

//Thinking about yours?//

‘All the time, but it’s good.’

“Ah!” the redhead suddenly burst out. “It’s so hypocritical!”

I noticed Gaelia and Maldyn had kept quiet—like Paytin—and I knew they were the smart ones. Still, I wanted to help.

“My—our—offer still stands, Tak.” I was referring to going with her to confront her father. But maybe, ‘confront’ was the wrong approach. How could we sidestep the problems? “Or maybe a workaround might help.”

“What do you mean?”

“What if we got Alric and Mr. W. Involved on your behalf?”

“Dad would be happy to help,” Magali told her. “He likes you.”

I don't think Magali's dad was the only one that 'liked' her.

“I don’t know. Aside from your two Masters’ their old Team doesn’t get together much.”

“I noticed that,” I said. “Was there some falling out? Every time I’m around Alric and any of his old Team, there’s a crap ton of tension.”

//Common denominator?//

‘*Snort*, Alric.’

//Or you//

“You know, that might be a good thing.” I forgot to follow up on the fallout, instead getting caught up in a new ploy.

“How’s that, Book? More tension isn’t going to get my father to accept it.”

“But...go with me here…if your dad sees that it is important enough for the others to put aside whatever it was, then maybe he’ll see it in a new light. What do you think?”

I saw the hope flicker in Tak’s eye, afraid to believe but out of ideas.

“Alright,” she said in a small voice. “Any thought on how to make it happen?”

“House warming.” The words were quiet, made worse by the mound of furry flesh Paytin had her face buried in.

“Good idea, Paytin,” said Magali.

“That’s perfect,” I chimed in.

“Don’t we need to finish the building, then?” Gaelia asked innocently.

“Yeah, that’s not happening anytime soon.”

“True, Maldyn,” I said. “That means we need to get going on it.”

“That’s right.”

“Sure does.”

“I’ll get my clipboard!”

“Hey! What about training?”

“Later, Tess. ‘We’ve got a long ways to go, and a short time to get there…’”

“Oh, no you don’t Book! You don’t quote ‘The Bandit’ to me, that’s my favorite old movie.”

“You just like the car.”

“Who doesn’t?”

“There they go again,” I heard Magali say.

“You know what, Book?”

“What, Tess?” I was in trouble, but it felt good.

“I liked it better when you were only talking to me and your Master. All this dialog is getting out of hand.”