Anna Marie stumbled out of the cab as her feet buckled attempting to balance on her high heels. Landing on her knees on the uneven sidewalk into a puddle, Anna Marie muttered a few choice swear words. Absolute pain shot from her kneecaps as she tried to rest her weight on her hands beside her on the pavement. With the world still spinning from all those martinis, Anna Marie pushed herself back onto her feet. Blood from her skinned knees mixed with her torn black pantyhose as she gazed at her dirty hands before wiping them onto her beige overcoat. The yellow taxi did not wait to check if she was okay but instead drove off down the street. Pissed off at the cab driver’s insensitivity, Anna Marie shouted to the taillights. “I’m fine, thanks for asking!”
“Jerk.” She muttered before turning back to her building and the impending staircase leading to the door. Holding onto the handrail, Anna Marie slowly rose each step nursing her skinned knees until she reached her front door. Clumsily, she pulled her keys out from her purse and took several passes trying to slip the key into the lock. On the fourth attempt, Anna Marie succeeded in unlocking the front door and then entered the flat. Light from the streetlamps shone through the etched glass windows slightly illuminating the foyer for Anna Marie. With a less than graceful move, she allowed her coat to slide off her arms and fall on the floor while she kicked off her high heels across the hallway. She strode over to the home’s circular staircase and decided to go down the stairs into the basement.
Gazing down the round staircase, Anna Marie could see perfectly as she lifted a foot to the first step downwards. And then all the light extinguished causing Anna Marie to be left in the pitch blackness. Terrified she was going to fall down the staircase with her foot in midair, Anna Marie cautiously lowered her foot trying to find the first step. Not finding it and still harboring fear of going head down the stairs, Anna Marie returned her one foot beside the other and slowly slid down onto her hands and knees. Once she was on all fours, she slid her hand on the floor trying to gauge where that step could be in the darkness. But she felt the floor as it continued straight when she knew logically it could not. “What?” She murmured as she kept feeling around.
That is when it dawned on Anna Marie that this wasn’t her house. She had never been in this house before. And where was she coming back from? Anna Marie hadn’t dresses up and gone out for the night since long before the divorce. Where was she? And where did the stairs go? A small white light appeared on her right-hand side shining like a motorcycle high beam. With the light, Anna Marie could see the staircase was gone, and she was on the floor in a large empty room. Standing up to face the bright light, Anna Marie put a hand up in front of her to shield her eyes. “Hello?” She called out with just an echo heard. A loud booming voice called out across the room. “Anna Marie Spencer!”
“Present” She answered as if back in primary school. With her hand still up shielding her eyes, she looked down at her feet to see bright red emanating from in between the floorboards. Anna Marie heard evil cackling from under the floorboards. Nervously, she called out in the direction of the loud voice. “Is this about my vaping in the apartment? Because I was assured by the guy at the store it is supposed to smell like berries?” The red glow from below her shone brighter as the floorboards began shaking and moving as the sounds of laughter grew. Gruesome hands broke through the hardwood and grabbed at Anna Marie’s legs. Starting to scream, Anna Marie jumped up from her bed and ran forward until she smacked her stomach in the couch. Eyes wide open, Anna Marie gasped for breath repeating to herself. “God is real. God is real.” And what scared her more than knowing that God was real was that meant the devil was real. She climbed over the couch to get her hands on the Bible she had left on a couch cushion.
She needed to know the basics to start with. Breaking the Ten Commandments is bad, and she could not remember all of them. Anna Marie had to check it out for herself. Flipping through the Bible, she couldn’t locate them upon demand. Grabbing her laptop, she opened the lid and typed into the search engine for the commandments. Up popped a screen and she read aloud.
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“No other Gods before God, don’t make or worship idols, don’t take the Lord’s name in vain, remember Sabbath day and keep it holy, honor father and mother, no murder, no adultery, no stealing, no bearing false witness and no coveting.” Anna Marie paused. “What does coveting mean?” Searching the definition, her stomach fell to her knees. “Desiring or longing something or somebody that does not belong to you.” Such as coveting after Calvin Hunter and all the other celebrities she used in her storied dreaming. “Great, I am a big sinner.” Anna Marie said as she lay across her sofa defeated. How many male celebrities has she dreamed about in this manner? She believes it started with David Bowie when she was younger, and she had switched the leading men around several times throughout her life. Savannah never changed, but her men’s face and name kept changing.
Well, wasn’t this a just good old kick to the stomach. Failure in life, and now in the eyes of the Lord, she had failed big time. Fear and panic overwhelmed Anna Marie, and she rolled off the couch and down onto her knees. Gazing up at her ceiling, she intertwined her hands together and spoke out loud. “God, please. I am a sinner, but please don’t send me into hell. I can’t have lived this poor excuse of a life and then be doomed for an eternity into hell. God, please. I’m sorry. Lord, please forgive me.” More tears formed and burst forth from Anna Marie. She felt like she was already living in purgatory, and she didn’t want to spend eternity in anymore hell. “Please forgive me Lord. Please forgive me.” The familiar buzzing sound of her phone echoed in her apartment. “Great Mom. Perfect timing.” Anna Marie used the back of her hand to wipe away fallen tears. She let out a big sigh, and reached across the coffee table. Grabbing the cell, she let out another breath and answered. “Hi Mom.”
“Anna Marie, I know you are busy over there pouting and wallowing in your misery, but we have really big problems over here. We just got the renewal papers for our apartment, and the rent is going up another two hundred dollars. Your father is freaking out. What are we going to do?” Anna Maria recognized the sound of fear in her mother’s voice and promptly forgot about her problems. Call her a failure, but Anna Marie did not like seeing her mother in pain or in fear. Wanting to calm her down, she replied. “Mom, do not panic. We can figure this out. If I am correct, it is illegal for landlords to raise rent over a certain percentage point.”
“Anna Marie, what are we going to do?” Her mother nervously asked her.
Knowing she needed to see the paperwork for herself, Anna Marie made a command decision. She would need to catch the bus and go over and check on her parents. The bus – it was really three buses, but Anna Marie could not stand by while her parents fretted. Her father was much older, and she feared he could worry himself into a heart attack. No, she had to go over. Even if that meant, she needed to go outside. Best not to think too much about it and just do it.
“Anna Marie, are you still there?” Her mother asked her prompting Anna Marie out of her daze.
“Sorry about that. Mom, I am coming over. Just hang on. I will see you soon. Alright.”
“Sounds good. See you soon.” And her mother hung up the phone.
Still on her knees, Anna Marie took a deep breath realizing this meant she had to go outside. Outside with people. She loved people – she was just scared of them. But if she was to be successful in travelling over to her parents, she could not think too much about it. She just had to get up and go. Gathering her courage, Anna Marie stood up and looked down at her pajamas. Well, she couldn’t go like this. Too late to have a shower. If she had a shower, it gave Anna Marie too much time to change her mind and stay at home and disappoint her parents. No, she could not take the chance of chickening out. Striding over to her dresser, Anna Marie did her bare necessities to get out of her apartment. Change her clothes, throw on some deodorant and wrap her hair up in a bun. It wasn’t pretty, but it got the job done. Anna Marie had to admit she did not mind wearing the masks after COVID, because it covered up her bad breath. Grabbing her phone, her bus tickets and her purse Anna Marie strode to her apartment door. She was doing it. She was finally leaving her apartment after, what, three weeks.
Exiting her apartment and into the hallway and exited the building, Anna Marie was blinded by the sunlight. And her first thought was “What have I done?”