The rising light of morning filters through the blinds of his window, grazing the tips of the socks he was wearing and illuminating the living room. He hadn’t been able to sleep last night, so he spent it with the company of several packs of beer while staring aimlessly at the ceiling from the couch. The remnants of his alcoholic binge currently lay on the floor around him, adding to the mess that has been accumulating for several weeks.
This is a regular occurrence for Jasper. He was regularly getting wasted alone at his home and then spending several hours without a single thought inside of his head. It’s a lot better than actually thinking about his mistakes. How his terrible life has come to this point.
Life is a funny thing, really. Nobody knows what the next moment will bring, how their actions and fate will conspire together to create an unknown future. At one point they could be living their life’s dream, then the next it all crumbles like a tower of cards.
Jasper has experienced that firsthand. His life, in his opinion, used to be perfect. He was motivated, dedicated, and always filled with the joy of a fulfilling career and family. Now, none of that was seen in him.
As time and the morning passed, Jasper continued to mindlessly stare upwards. The hangover was starting to creep up on him, but he wasn’t bothering to get some water. When he started to feel the call of nature, he knew he needed to get up.
With a large amount of grunting, Jasper rose his body from the couch. Bottles and piles of old food were pushed aside as he groggily walked to the bathroom. He wasn’t paying attention to his surroundings right now, he would clean the place up when he felt like it.
He stopped as he noticed a shelf with several portraits and items on it. He worked through the heavy haze to remember what they were, letting out a rough sigh as he did. The haunting image of his friends and squadmates smiling happily at him.
Various portraits, accolades, and his uniform were stored here, showcasing the time and commitment he spent in the United States Marines. Lifting a hand to get a closer look, Jasper stared at one of the terrible pictures of such happy and naive kids. All of us freshly graduated from BASIC training.
The photo was far from professional-looking, more rowdy and rambunctious like how a group of young teenagers would act. Earl was leaning next to Jamara, a teasing grin as he went in for a hug she was desperately pulling away from. Derrick, the favorite clown of our group, had used his size and weight advantage to grab me in a headlock. Kenny and Maddison, brother and sister respectively, were trying to save me from my unfortunate fate while Vernon was lamenting it all in the background and holding up peace signs.
Despite how dull his mind and emotions currently were, he could sense the floodgates keeping back the memories start to open. It was making the numbness go away, replacing it with such awful feelings. Before they could overwhelm him, Jasper replaced the photo and hurried to the bathroom. He didn’t want to break his little memorial shrine, again.
Once his body finished its business, Jasper generously splashed water onto his face. The cool water helped to ground him, to make him feel more stable and in control. The memories were still fighting their way out, to remind him of what happened. They would never be contained forever, but he could lie to himself and say they were.
Gazing into the mirror, Jasper took a full view of his appearance. His curly black hair was very long and frazzled, and his facial hair hadn’t been trimmed or shaved in months. His golden-brown eyes have deep dark circles under them, their familiar blank gaze reflected back at him. His normally lean figure has become more gaunt over time, as he was barely keeping up with any sort of eating schedule.
Jasper was pitiable, he would not deny that. He was barely holding on, and he couldn’t see any light at the end of the tunnel. At times, certain thoughts have entered into his head, but he would barely give them much attention. His life may be gone, but he was too stubborn to take that route.
Jasper leaves his ugly reflection, deciding it is about time for some breakfast. Not a lot was stocked in his apartment kitchen, reminding him that he needed to order some groceries. For now, he prepares a bowl of cereal and grabs another cold beer.
Nothing surprising or new happened over the next several hours. Jasper ate the great sustenance of breakfast while scrolling through the news on his phone. It was nothing but the typical local stuff, as nothing exciting usually happens in Georgia. Thankfully, that is just the way Jasper prefers it.
Just before noon though, a heavy knock came from the front door. Jasper hesitated for a bit, enough that a second and louder knock sounded out. Confusion and a little wariness filled his mind since most of the tenants wouldn’t bother doing this. Getting up, he travels to the door and cracks it open to see who it is.
“Hey, Jasper. Long time no see.’ spoke Earl with playful cheerfulness and a smile like nothing was wrong.
Immediately, Jasper slams the door shut and backs away while taking some shuddering breaths. This is not how he ever wanted his day to go. Hopefully, just ignoring it would let everything resolve itself.
“Is this a bad time, Jasper?” Earl’s muffled voice passed through the door, “Sorry, but I’m not going to leave. I got my CO to agree to hand me a few days of leave so that I could see you.”
With an agonizing groan, Jasper unhooks the chain from the door and pulls it fully open to glare menacingly at the taller man. Earl was smiling brightly, obviously ignoring the murderous gaze Jasper was giving them. Earl is the opposite of him in many ways, most notably in their current appearances.
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Earl’s skin is a slight caramel, with a very muscular physique that has been adamantly cared for. His blonde hair is just on the edge of military regulations, with no facial hair covering his large square jaw. Their blue eyes, always filled with some sort of mischief, look at Jasper expectantly. Where Jasper wore nothing besides plain shorts and a dull shirt, Earl was fully equipped for a cold Georgia Fall.
“Earl,” Jasper’s slurred words were spoken with restrained annoyance, “get out of here.”
Earl’s smile diminished for the briefest moment before returning to its infectious brightness.
“Jasper, come on. We haven’t talked to each other in a while and I wanted to see how you are doing. I know things haven’t gone your way lately, but you could always use a friend to talk with.”
Earl’s gaze pointedly went over his messy appearance, which made him a little self-conscious but also frustrated.
“Maybe to give you a few reminders to groom yourself. Did you decide to bathe in mud and alcohol?”
“Earl, I’m telling you this for the last time. Go away.”
He begins closing the door, hoping they’ll take the hint and listen to him. That hope was futile, as the next second Earl barged the door open and entered without invitation. The difference between their current physical strength is too much for Jasper.
Trained reflexes start up and Jasper throws a punch to Earl’s face. Earl easily dodges it and lunges forward to wrap their arms around him. Jasper continues to throw punches and tries to escape from the hold, but the effort is fruitless. Earl grabs onto his arm and pins it to his back while locking him in a light chokehold, and expert execution of the technique. He continues to struggle out of Earl’s grip as the bigger man speaks into his ear.
“Jasper, it’s me! You aren’t in danger, you’re safe. You are back home.”
Those final words let him calm down, the adrenaline starting to recede and calmness returning to his mind. Once Jasper’s body is relaxed enough, he signals to Earl that he is fine and is released from the hold. The two marines look silently at each other, and Jasper can tell Earl is feeling the same apologetic and sad emotions.
“I’ll admit, that was probably my fault,” Earl mutters awkwardly, “But that doesn’t excuse your own behavior, Jasper. Seriously, man, all I’m trying to do is help you get through this.”
Jasper frowns deeply at the man, who couldn’t possibly understand anything he was going through. To be tortured and lost for all those years, with the only hope he held on to becoming a false fantasy. The memories threaten to overwhelm him, and Jasper allows them to flow freely this time.
“I don’t want your fucking help! What can you actually do to fix this?! My life and unit are completely gone, I have nothing left. While I was gone, you got everything you wanted. You’re a Marine Captain now, and I’m just the unlucky trash they threw away. Everything I built for myself is gone forever, so now I’m just not going to do anything else.”
Rant over, he pushes Earl into the wall and walks into his bedroom for some much-needed privacy. Slamming and locking the door behind him, Jasper fell onto his bed like a puppet that had its strings cut. Having to face Earl always ends in this way. They may have been close friends once, but that ended for Jasper over three years ago.
His moment of quiet is interrupted as footsteps approach his bedroom. For the next several minutes though, there is only a poignant sense of silence. Jasper didn’t want to be the one that spoke first, and neither did Earl it seemed. Eventually, one of them would have to suck it up.
“Jasper,” Earl began, “I’m sorry about what happened to you, and I’m sorry for barely trying to reach out to you. Everything about this is complete and utter crap, and it shouldn’t have happened in the first place. I want you to get better, and I want us to be friends again. I know things won’t be the same as before, but I hate seeing you like this. It wasn’t just you that lost people you deeply cared about.”
He rolls over the bed, looking at the door. He could see where Earl was coming from, but it wasn’t working. Why even bother with this anyway? Everyone he cared for and hoped to see again had moved on with their lives, including Cynthia and-
“Earl, if you don’t have something useful to say then just go. I’m living perfectly fine so-”
“Fuckin’ Jesus, Jasper. If you don’t open this door in ten seconds I am kicking it off its hinges. Ten, nine…”
“Fine, you win! Just don’t knock down my damn door.”
A few moments later, Jasper is sitting on the edge of his bed with Earl looking around his barren room. The apartment has only been his for less than four months, and he has barely bothered to decorate it beyond the bare essentials. His memorial shrine was the most personal thing in the entire apartment.
“This is a very nice apartment you have. Worth every penny you got from the Veterans Association. As charming as this place is, I still think you need to have a chat with me. I set up a reservation at this new restaurant downtown. I’ve been there before, and it’s really good. They have this-”
“Earl, get on with it.”
“Jesus, okay. I want you to come with me. We don’t have to do or talk about anything specific, just a chat between friends who want to reconnect. You’ll have to shower and get dressed before we go.”
“And if I say I haven’t paid my water bill for the past several months?” he innocently asks, trying any way to get out of this.
“Then I’m dragging you out of here and forcing you through a carwash. Stop pushing on this, Edwards. Remember what happened during that mission in Venezuela?”
He shudders as the memory of that mission resurfaces. Earl can become extremely forceful and violent at certain moments, even if they are rare. Without any more incentive, Jasper takes a brief shower and dresses in clothes Earl had prepared for him.
“After this, you are treating me to a full night at a bar.”
“Sure, but not anything from the top shelf. Plus, you need to make a serious effort when you talk to Cynthia.”
“Cynthia?!” he exclaims in confusion and alarm, “Why did you invite her to this? I only accepted but I thought it would only be us two!”
Earl gives him a smirk and a wink.
“No backing out of this one, it’s been needed for months. If you try to sneak out of this, then I will put you through that carwash.”
He gives an annoyed growl at his friend. This is definitely not how he wanted his day to go.
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