Before I could initiate my intention to lessen the prying eyes on me, Astor decided to say something.
“Well Acolyte Alkef, here is the dining hall. I’ll assign someone to give you a tour tomorrow so that you don’t get lost again.”
“Thank you, sir. I apologize for taking up some of your time.”, I said as I bowed my head slightly.
Astor did so as well and went in the opposite direction. As I turned to the crowd once more, some resumed eating and talking among themselves while others continued looking only for a while until they eventually lost interest. As there were only twenty-one people in this room, I immediately spotted Marcs who stood up from his seat and approached me.
“I didn’t know you’d personally try and explore yourself.”
“Well, I was curious as to why everyone disappeared almost immediately when I went to look outside after staying in the room for just a few minutes.”
“Oh that. You’ll also have to get used to doing that once you start helping out here tomorrow.”
“It really sounds difficult if you put it like that.”
“Well, that’s already sugarcoating it a bit.”
Marcs then led me to where I could get my share of dinner and then to where he was seated. The two other people he was seated with were rather unremarkable. We introduced ourselves to each other and the name of the lanky ten-year-old is Hasibo and the similarly lanky but long-haired nine-year-old is Terio. I would've assumed they were actually brothers if they hadn't clarified that they weren't. The fact that almost immediately clarified this in the first place meant that this was usually brought up to them by others.
Terio decided to ask me a question.
"You look fairly young, Alkef, how old are you?"
"Five."
"I thought you were just short, I guess your appearance does reflect your age."
He hit me with one of my insecurities just now. Yes, I'm short because I'm still very young. Sure. But, I still don't like the feeling of being almost every person I've interacted with towering over me. The constant necessity to look up just to meet people in the eyes when I talk to them is such a hassle. I'd have to at least get a decent view of their facial feature just so that I could tell the proper words to say.
"You're an acolyte already while still being that young? You must be very talented then!"
"No. I'm sure I'm not."
"How long was your apprenticeship then?"
"Around two years or more."
"Wait.", Hasibo suddenly said as he started counting with his fingers.
It's not like basic subtraction is that difficult to do, right?
"So, you started becoming a member when you were only three and you're saying that your apprenticeship was two years long?"
"Yes, and yes."
It was then Marcs' turn to comment after hearing the conversation.
"Alkef, usually apprenticeship only takes an average of six months to one year. If your apprenticeship took that long then does mean that you're an orphan?"
"Why is that the assumption?"
"Well, orphans usually don't have a future to choose as they are indebted to the church for taking them in when no one else wanted them."
"That's the case with me.", Terio interjected.
"Well, I'm not an orphan. I have actually signed up to become a member of the Church of Hure out of my own free will.", I decided to clarify. However, the explanation they gave for the assumption earlier did not make sense to me, so I asked once again.
"But still, why the assumption?"
"I once compared with Marcs what we both learned about during our apprenticeship. My apprenticeship took almost two years while Marcs' only took eight months. I learned a lot of other things like etiquette, arcanes other than [Mend] and [Stabilize], the history of the Church of Hure, and general knowledge like arithmetic, grammar, and writing."
Although I've almost had the same curriculum as Terio mentioned, mine did not include general knowledge but rather I was also taught matters involving the various organizations in this world, geography, flora identification, theories involving the celestial realm and abyssal realm, arkind anatomy, and basic survival. Flora identification and basic survival lessons were from High Priest Tianle as he insinuated that he always wanted to be an adventurer but various circumstances led him to become a member of the Church of Hure. He taught me these three months before I left saying that I will definitely need them when I start my pilgrimage. All this information is packed in my brain clearly and freely retrievable, probably due to various abnormalities involving my mind.
"I was also taught the same things.", I decided to lie.
"Do you plan on actually becoming a priest in the Church of Hure?", Hasibo then asked upon hearing my reply.
"You guys aren't going to?"
Both Marcs and Hasibo shook their heads. Marcs decided to explain first.
"I plan to be a Private Healer once I'm done with my duties. Once I learn and master [Remedy], I'll request for my departure."
It was then Hasibo's turn.
"I plan to be a Tiered Priest, so until I accumulated enough service years with the church, I'll be staying for a while."
A Private Healer is similar to what my mother does in the village, although she is a Tiered Priest. As father once said, he and mother were adventurers, and adventurers start out as Tier 5 of their chosen specialty. For someone to become a Tiered Priest, they need to get accreditation from an organization that teaches [Support-Type] arcanes, and the Church of Hure is considered the best choice as they offer it for free in exchange for service years. Learning from an arcane institution would be a faster way, but it would cost a fortune that only wealthy families or nobles of kingdoms could afford. The qualifications to become a Tiered Priest is certainly tedious, but they are in high demand as they don't have to be adventurers all the time for them to actually have work. As for Private Healers, it would depend on how good they actually are as they will be engaging mostly on private healing requests.
A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.
"I do plan on becoming a permanent member of the Church of Hure.", I decided to say after hearing about their future plans and I could see Terio look at me and nod in agreement.
I have no choice after all. Two identities in my head have chosen this path, and I'm already too involved with the Church of Hure to then suddenly choose to leave. I'm sure they wouldn't allow me to leave as I'm their designated future Saint.
The conversation died down and eventually, a bell rang. It was a signal to clean up after ourselves and return to our rooms. We all said our farewells with each other as we then head to our respective rooms.
Upon entering my room, I then decide to open my luggage and unpack the things inside. They were my toothbrush, a few sets of clothes, another small notebook that contained short messages from my supposed friends back in Sevis City, dried fruit snacks made by mother, and finally, my ukulele which is known in this world as a [Minitar]. I changed to more comfortable clothes and took my toothbrush as I left my room to do the most necessary hygienic practice. After doing so, I returned and sat on a chair.
Go ahead.
Once I thought those words, my view went dark and I was dragged to that familiar empty space in my head. There I saw two individuals that looked exactly like me. This was Al and the 'disappointment'.
"I'd just like to ask who was doing all the learning back then in Sevis City."
"That would be me", Al admitted.
"Well, starting tomorrow, the one who will be in control is Alkef."
"Why me!?", the 'disappointment' shouted in protest.
"It's for your own good. Have you considered comparing the three of us? It may sound harsh for you, but you're the most incompetent."
"No!", the 'disappointment' denied outright and then looked at Al for validation. However, all he met was the stare of Al as if he was struggling to tell what he really wanted to say.
"Yes, Alkef. It will be good for you."
After nodding for Al's approval of this plan, I then added.
"I'm guessing the maturity had gone to Al here and you just watched as he did everything for you. You get the privilege of using your real full name here while we're stuck with nicknames. You got to work for that name and deserve it."
"I don't want to!"
"What did you say?", I said with a slightly serious tone.
Noticing that I seemed angry, the 'disappointment' tried to retract his statement.
"I mean, I'm not confident enough to be doing this."
"That's why tomorrow is a perfect time since it will be the first day tomorrow. No one's going to get angry with you too much if you mess up."
"What if I mess something up very badly?"
"Well, you've always got Al to assist you, right Al?"
"Yes. Don't worry Alkef, I'll just control the body if a problem occurs."
"See? Well, you gotta sleep early now so that you're wide awake and active for tomorrow."
After a momentary silence, the 'disappointment' agreed. "Fine.", then disappeared.
"Thank you for guiding him." Al thanked me. He must've been through a lot while looking after that 'disappointment'.
"Sure, but I'm not done yet. I also have to say that's it's your fault for why he's like that in the first place."
"... I know."
"You've taken most of the responsibility and deprived him of facing them on his own. Instead of him thinking for himself, he now relies on you to do all the thinking. Sure, you're good at that, but being good at something doesn't mean that you have to do all of it yourself."
"How... how can you understand us so well?"
"Simple. I was just like you two once."
That was a lie. I did not explain further and asked Al to stop this meeting already, but before he did that, I remembered to ask him to teach me how to initiate these mental meetings. He nodded in agreement and some sort of experience flashed in my head, showing me how to do it.
"How did you even know that you could do that?"
"I just know. I knew how to do it since the day I grew awareness."
"When was that?"
"The day you witnessed the fight between Caltro and Vanessa."
That would mean that he became aware at almost the same time as [The True Pacifist] got unlocked. As I had no longer any questions to ask, I imitate what I learned about the start and end of these mental meetings, and this empty darkness was replaced with the view of my room. I then proceeded to lie down and try to sleep.
As this bed felt very unfamiliar, I had difficulty trying to fall asleep so I tried to bore myself to sleep while trying to remember my past.
...
Remembering my childhood as Samuel Tuckerman, I did not think for myself as I allowed my parents to direct what I did. When I became a teenager, that was when the urge started to appear. The urge eventually became a craving. This craving was not the one that any teenager would seek at that age. The thing I craved was freedom. I hated the feeling of needing to comply with anything. I once thought that this was my rebellious phase acting up, but I eventually realized that this was not the case.
One day, my homeroom teacher saw me walking back to my house. As I lived rather far from school, my walks would take more or less an hour before I could reach home. It wasn't that I was being neglected, but rather I insisted on it. I told my parents that I wanted to discipline myself and increase my stamina, thus they would bring me to school, and then I walked back home. The neighborhood wasn't known for being dangerous and there hasn't been a bad incident that happened in that place for at least two decades, so my parents reluctantly agreed after my persistence. This was the only way I could somehow feel that I was 'free', and the homeroom teacher decided to intervene. She offered to at least take me closer to my house as our paths intersected, and I had no choice but to agree as I couldn't think of an excuse back then to refuse her offer.
This continued until one day I had enough. I felt that the world didn't want me to be free, therefore I did something very reckless. While my homeroom teacher was driving and I was inside the car, I grabbed the steering wheel and turned it into the other side. As she probably did not know how to react due to my sudden actions, she may have been stunned for a bit and I was allowed to keep the steering wheel turned until we went offroad. We passed through lots of trees as we drove downslope within a sea of leaves. We eventually reached a cliff and fell. I did all that because I thought death would be my freedom, and I knew that I was not brave enough to kill myself on my own, so I had to rely on something uncertain and out of my control.
The next thing I knew, I woke up while seated in the car. I had injuries all over me but they weren't extreme. It felt like I broke my arm and a few ribs during that. When I checked the driver's seat, my homeroom teacher wasn't there. I got out of the car and there I saw her lifeless body sprawled at the side. She still had a look of surprise on her face, and one could see that what killed her was her visibly broken neck. I then heard a lot of people calling from the top of the cliff as well as the barking of dogs. A flashlight blinded me for a bit as it was clearly directed at me. I was found by the rescue team.
I was patched up, and eventually, the incident was considered an accident. I got away with it. I got away with taking another person's life. Although that was not my initial intention, I still finally felt the freedom I was looking for. I was free from the shackles of fear. I was free from the burden of the law. I was free from the consequences of my actions. If that wasn't freedom, then what is? I may still have to outwardly follow the rules of life, but my experiences from then on piled up and they were the proof of my freedom. Through this freedom, I knew that I was alive.
...
Looking back at it now, I'm in the same situation once again. But this time, despite my experiences, I'm not sure if I can get myself the 'freedom' I'm looking for. Browsing through the things that Al learned back in Sevis City. I chanced upon something called [Curses]. It was said that they are the opposite of [Blessings] and they were inflicted by creatures from the abyssal realm. Although they aren't as permanent as [Blessings], there are those that could offset the abilities granted by [Blessings]. Although I'm not sure if there's such a [Curse] that is the exact opposite of [The True Pacifist], that's one of my options, rather that's the only option I have come up with as of now. However, looking at the company I keep and the environment surrounding me, the chances of me suffering a curse is practically zero.