No.

No, no, no, no.

It can't be.

I looked to Flaze, waiting for her to tell me that I was mistaken. A silly assumption, to think a monster was actually my friend.

I felt her quiver, behind me, on my back. Her clone as well was on her knees, the tears unseen because of the knightly helmet, but she was clearly sobbing.

My knees faltered, I felt weak. I wanted to just collapse and have a good cry upon the loss of a dear friend, but then I suddenly jumped.

Wait! I neighed, I'm a horse, and I'm fine. So was Steven several floors below! Darkvoid could have just turned into a goatman, but is actually still the Darkvoid we both know and love!

Flaze stared at me for a single second, before her eyes widened.

"You're right!" She said, "He may be a monster, but he may yet be Darkvoid!"

She hopped off my back as both her and her clone approached the prone form of the one we identified to be Darkvoid. I sensed a caution in her movement, but she slowly touched his arm and shook him awake.

[Mage - Lvl 65]

A pause.

A serene calm.

An oppressive silence.

A void. Where nothing matters.

I blanked out for a second, before being slammed back into reality. A horrific scream, the bleating of a goat assaulted my ears. I heard myself shouting back, a neigh of terror, and of pain.

I felt it then, the oppressive waves of Darkvoid's scream. It hammered into my ears and beyond, my very bones shaking from its pressure.

I tried to look around, to get my bearings in order. The world looked so chaotic, fragmented. Melded together and shattered into tiny pieces all the same.

I screamed again, I heard myself neighing upon the weight of my own mind shattering. Like someone had reached into my brain and started clawing inside of it.

Suddenly, The pain eased, and the world stilled, the horrific sound gone from existence, if only for a single second. It was enough for me to catch a glimpse Flaze, shouting something, her shield smashing down on who we thought to be Darkvoid.

He recoiled, and then straightened back again. The goat's mouth opened, and I knew what was coming. I tried to brace myself myself but it was not even close to being enough to shield me from the terrible sound waves that arrive, shouting whispers penetrating deeply into my very mind

I screamed back, again. But this time I had remembered something

[Blessed Heal].

The screeching headache was mended, if only slightly. The broken pieces of my mind stitched back together, allowing me a clearer view of the world for a precious few moments.

I forced myself to turn back around, activating my heal whenever it becomes too much to bear.

I saw Flaze, standing there. Two of her, both in a knight's costume, shouting.

"Darkvoid!" They called.

"Darkvoid!" She repeated his name.

Her shield slammed again, halting the creature--Darkvoid's screaming. Flaze clone followed up with another smash, and his head was passed around, halting the horrific screeches that damaged my very mind.

"Jackal!" She called for me, noticing that I was was heaving and panting, but still standing, looking straight at her.

Yes? I neighed weakly, and noticed the tears and blood running down her face. I too was crying, my nose smelled of blood.

"He's still... He's... Is he a monster now? Is there... is there nothing...?"

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There's gotta be a way! I screamed, now running towards her. Darkvoid can't just be dead!

"Yeah... Yes of course! He's alive, and we've got to wake him up!"

"Begone monster!" Her clone screamed, just as our enemy regained his balance and attacked once again with mind breaking sounds.

I lurched, my feet grew heavy. I was rooted in place as I felt myself vomiting blood, fluids leaking from every orifice within my face.

[Blessed Heal].

I gained another burst of energy, but Flaze had collapsed. Her sword was still sheathed, her shield used only to support her weight.

Her clone, on the other hand, was already down. She spasmed on the ground, dying.

I crawled my way towards them, and extended out my heal.

"Darkvoid!" They shouted again, rushing for Darkvoid who had fallen back. Their shields hit his head, lessening the burden on our minds and bodies upon the monster's--Darkvoid's loss of concentration. Flaze did not let up and maintained her offensive. "DARKVOID!"

She had him below her now, Darkvoid collapsed and punching into her armored form as she tried to stop him from screaming out. She summoned another clone, sealing away our opponent even further, the monster's mouth jammed entirely with their shields.

The mind magic, however, was still present even without the destructive shout that once accompanied it.

It was only weaker. A war that remained with rules and honor, instead of one destined only for annihilation.

"DARKVOID! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE DARKVOID! FIGHT IT! FIGHT THE MONSTER! GET BACK TO US! GET BACK TO US! DARKVOID!"

Flaze struggled, large rivers of tears streaming down her and her clone's helmet. Still, she did not give up, trying to pull back our friend from the darkest of depths, the deepest abyss. I gave her all the support I can, even as I slumped down, the exhaustion taking over me. I healed her whenever it was necessary.

Time passed, and we only grew more weary, tired, and wounded. I found myself panting, heaving, heavy breaths accompanied by the entire world dimming.

I was afraid, terrified. I felt saddened, an unbearable grief that just gripped my heart and squeezed it into pieces.

I cried, not because of the occasional bleating from Darkvoid that made it into my ears, nor the mind magic that continued to claw against my skull. The pain had long gone numb.

My tears ran freely, at the loss of a friend.

The crack of bone, a horn falling apart. Flaze had grown desperate, against the goat creature. Her screams were unending as she kept on trying and trying to pull him back from the brink. Only for her each and every attempt to be met by the monster's increasingly monstrous demeanor, no visage of our friend left to be seen.

"This isn't you..." she cried, sobbing now, rivers of tears and blood falling from her helmet, and onto the monster's face.

"...You can fight it. You're Darkvoid... A badass. Always has been. We always made fun of you, but I understood, how much you truly cared, what change you wished to see. So show us now that rage, all your gripes with the world! Of all the injustices and secrets kept, history rewritten for their benefit!"

"Don't lose! Don't lose, Darkvoid! Don't let it beat you!"

Flaze pleaded over and over, but I felt neither hope nor faith from her words. It was almost like she was saying it to herself, to convince herself of what she so wishes to be true.

But I knew. I felt it, way back then. When magic itself first entered my body, and changed me from within, turning me into a horse. The sensation of my mind breaking, what is now called Ego Death.

I won't say it's absolutely impossible. I wish to hold on to hope just as much as Flaze does. But I honestly, I sincerely doubt there is a way to get it back, once it is fully lost.

I heard the goat monster scream again, and I nearly lost consciousness, perhaps permanently. Part of me wished to just surrender, to accept that it is the end, but then I heard Flaze's own shouts resounding, her clone an ethereal husk lying on the ground.

I felt tired. So very tired. But I forced myself to stand on all four legs, watching as Flaze herself picked herself back up and shivered, spilling blood out of her mouth.

Our enemy too stood, also dazed and wobbly, but that did not stop his offensive, a shuddering tone to his bleats.

[Blessed Heal].

That barely helped, I'm still in danger of blacking out in the next second. I also cast the skill on Flaze, who took a deep breath and looked at the monster with resolve.

I'm running on fumes now, I could collapse at any second, without ever having done anything. I will die, broken by the world, broken by what has happened. Whatever I believed to be my potential, whatever dreams I wished to fulfill, will remain but the silly delusions of a kid that never quite grow up. Only in his last moments did he see, accept the world for how bleak it truly is.

And in a way, a friend's death already ruins the picture I wished to paint of my future. We can never reign in the apocalypse now as I once thought upon seeing magic in action, nor can we give that final play, which I both dreaded, and awaited. I still felt excitement about it, for I truly did love to perform along with all the people I actually cared about, even if it was to be the final time.

I sniffed, and saw Flaze changed into a Samurai, her legs shaking, eyes unfocused and afraid. It was hard to even exist, let alone manage an attack on what was once a friend, the possibility that he could yet be saved an endless dread in our minds. What if he dies, when we could in the future find a way to save him?

Maybe if we'd thought of that from the beginning, we could still try. But against such an opponent, with injuries like what we'd sustained trying to grab onto a nonexistent hope, there would be no more running.

I stared one last time at Darkvoid, his usual attire worn now by a monster. I cried and I wept and I sobbed, as a blood red light manifested and licked upon my face.

[Hellish Fireball].

A fireball, one truly from hell, the dread of death and sin. With the last vestiges of my consciousness, I shot it towards my friend.

A shockwave felt from a distance, the quiver of burning air.

The world grew darker, I felt myself slipping.

A crashing sound, my head impacted the ground. I had just fallen, white tiles that felt cold against my fur.

The last thing I ever saw was the burning head of a goat, severed from the body of an equally burning man.

Flaze was there too. Her shaking stopped for but a moment, only so she could deliver that one swift motion.