We came face to face with an alien-looking woman in the eighth floor. Her hair was disheveled, eyes pitch black with a vaguely diamond-shaped slit in the middle, and a misshapen mouth full of jagged shark-like teeth. In place of arms, she had a tentacle-like appendage to replace each, but completely smooth without any suctions. The rest of her body still looked like that of a human's, a jersey with some stupid team's logo on it, and pajamas.

Flaze took one look at the creature and said, "Heal me."

I obliged, and she tossed a perfectly good bottle of champagne away.

It wasn't actually that important to sober her up. She gets a little buzz, but compared to what she's drunk, her tolerance has clearly spiked.

The same goes for me, I used to be a hopeless lightweight. That said, I'm a bloody fucking horse, so it's not very conclusive how much my stats and skills are helping against alcohol.

Maybe horses are just really good at holding their liquor. I don't know.

Flaze's clone walked over to the woman, and I wondered how getting drunk works if she's technically in two bodies...

"Jackal. Focus."

Yes, maam. I snickered. I'm a horse and it sounded weird. I snickered even louder.

That also made Flaze snicker and she told herself off to focus.

"Hello, person." Flaze Clone said, towards our new guest. "Are you a person?"

The monster woman responded. By slapping the clone silly with a tentacle. Clone Flaze held her shield up in time, but was still tossed into a nearby wall, the crunch of bone resounding.

"Level 59. Warrior." Flaze said. Her clone too can use identify, which is quite the cheat.

So not sentient? I neighed.

Flaze shook her head from my back.

Another impact rattle the clone's shield, it bent inward, in a way it wasn't supposed to. The monster's tentacles were long, and all Flaze Clone could do was defend herself.

We do try to check just in case, if we suspect that a monster might actually be sentient. A person. I know all about being mistaken for an inherently violent being that cannot be reasoned with.

I'm only one of those things.

That said, we've yet to find a monster whose main instinct against us wasn't to immediately attack. We've no choice really, but to fight back once that happens, not that I'd ever chosen to sacrifice the element of surprise just to ask, but getting Clone Flaze to scout first is much better than an uncertain ambush.

I am genuinely curious though, how intelligent they are. Gremlins certainly seem quite very clever.

I turned my attention back to the fight. Clone Flaze was getting clobbered over and over, her shield now crumpled, the tentacles impacting heavily on her armor as the metal caved in. The monster yelled and smashed Flaze's clone with her left tentacle, slathering a disgusting amount of goo into her ruined armor.

Wait, what? Goo?

That's when I noticed, a visible sheen over the monster's body. It was a disgusting amount of slime covering its entire form, specially thick around the tentacle arms.

The snot-like liquid spread and slathered unto whatever she hit, the clone of Flaze now being drenched. The walls and floors around her too were not spared, doused in the liquids of a [REDACTED] fan.

I have no idea what sport her jersey's team is even supposed to be of. I laugh-neighed.

I looked over at the real one, the real Flaze, and she had an expression of utter disgust painted over her face.

Makes sense.

Clone Flaze stepped back, panting, near dead. She nearly slipped on the slime, but steadied herself against a wall.

The monster shrieked, a vile sound like the cry of a baby mixed with a dinosaur giving birth. She opened her mouth and stared at the clone of Flaze, I swear the woman's crooked mouth was bent into a grin. Her next breath was hot, with it came fire, a cone that spread out before her setting her own slime alight.

And all those it was slathered upon.

"Aarrrggghhhh!!" Clone Flaze yelled as she burned, the real flaze going unsteady on my back as she lurched, the pain felt by the same person.

I caught her, my eyes still glued to the battle. Flaze's clone collapsed like a doll with its string cut out, the flames sticking to her form like she was doused with napalm.

Flaze gritted her teeth and squeezed at the skin of my neck to go and charge that monster, kill it with prejudice. I instead fell back, eyeing the creature with a surfacing grin on my face.

[Hellish Fireball].

This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.

A hot ball of flames bigger than my horse head formed in front me and I shot it straight towards my enemy.

The blood-red flames reached her, splattering against the slime covering her skin. The blazing fire set her alight, it clung to her form... for but a few moments. It fizzled out even quicker than normal flames.

Eh?

The slime still surrounded the monster's form, barely diminished, if at all. I had thought it flammable, but it completely repelled my flames.

Eh?

I was confused. I just watched that slime go up in flames like gasoline. It killed the clone of Flaze. So why the fuck did it not burn, and instead snuffed out my Hellish Fireball?

I clicked my tongue, and bolted out of the area, losing the monster once I descended down the stairs.

"Why'd you run?" Flaze asked when I sat down to think. She was already off my back, "We could've taken it."

Maybe. I shrugged. But it behaved oddly. Its powers, I mean.

"Don't get spooked Jackal. I'm sure we could've take her regardless. But sure, let's think about why it is that her slime is sometimes flammable and sometimes not."

I nodded. I believed her, we probably would have won regardless. But that had gone way off my expectations, the control and initiative was gone from our Party. So I thought it best to recharge and regroup.

I felt a hand patting me on the head. "Don't worry too much Jackal. Maybe you were right. Nothing wrong with caution."

She sat beside me and started thinking back on our previous battle as well. "I shouldn't be too impatient perhaps. It's just Darkvoid could die while we dally here. This is a rescue mission..."

You're right. I nodded. We were hurrying, much more so than when we were back at Flaze's apartment. Already we'd cleared out seven floors, and the sun hasn't yet set. And that's with me killing most of the mobs solo. I'd managed to level once, bringing me up to 41.

"We should hurry up after this one." Flaze said. "Just kill the monsters in our way, skip to the higher floors as fast as we can."

I looked at her, worried.

"You're right. I know it's dangerous. We could get boxed in, flanked, if we leave the monsters alive on the lower floors."

"I'm just worried. We should be hurrying. I know it's very unlikely, but I'd regret it if we took our time only to climb up to where Darkvoid might be, only find him being mauled by some rabid wild goblin. A death we could have prevented had we arrived just a single minute earlier."

I really doubt that, and she does too... But holy shit the possibility is there and now I'm also panicking.

I'm in! I neighed, and she smiled.

"We'll be fine," Flaze reassured, "the monsters that would actively give chase during our retreat would likely give chase during our ascent, so we an take care of them then. More monsters are probably wandering into the lower floors that we've cleared anyway, and the faster we're done with this, the less of them awaits in our descent."

"And besides." She added, smirking. "We could always jump out of a window."

~~~

I walked back to the eighth floor with a proper plan to face the Slobber.

We named the tentacled monster that likes to rub its snot all over you. The Slobber.

It's weird that Identify doesn't give the name or species of a creature, but then why would it? It only feels strange because I've read about it being the case, but I've never actually experienced real magic until I became a horse.

In short, horses are magic.

The Slobber's tricks spooked me a little bit, but I've figured it out. She's far from the highest leveled monster I've met, and defeated.

Flaze had looked at me like I had finally gone insane, if I hadn't yet so far, when I summoned the largest fireball I could, and doused it all on myself.

But there was little damage done, I had focused my intent on the flames not being damaging to myself, and they weren't. Like it had a will of its own, not wishing to do me harm.

Flaze still thought I was insane. But she acknowledged that I haven't gotten any more insane. It's not becoming a horse that's fucked with my head.

Regardless of how my horse brain functions, we concluded that the Slobber's snot-goop changes properties, from flammable to inflammable, according to her will. Just like how my flames behave differently by my command.

One thing I did wonder was whether or not the goop's properties can be altered away from the monster's body, or if she has to set it beforehand, but hopefully we'd never find out.

I waited, for a moment. I was alone this time, by myself. Flaze was not with me. Thankfully the monsters in the hallways were killed by the Slobber herself, their charred remains visible.

"NOW!"

I heard Flaze's shout and I ran. I had circled around the floor earlier, waiting for the signal. I turned around a single bend, and I saw at the end of the corridor, Flaze and Flaze both holding up a shield each, pushing back the Slobber.

I neighed and activated Trailblazer, jumping with a twist at the last second as both Flazes held onto the monster for dear life. I kicked up, and my hind legs made contact with the Slobber's spine. I felt my feet slipping just a little bit from the slime, but they dug deep regardless into the creature's flesh, a flash of light erupting from the point of impact.

The monster shrieked its disconcerting wail, but I quickly steadied myself for another kick.

[Horsekick Gambit]!

It landed, hellfire erupted, neither Flaze let go of the monster even as they were clobbered, alternating taunts used to further disorient. I tossed a heal as well, towards their way.

I gave another kick to the creature's the back, then its head, knees, and finally straight in the ass. All with my hind legs, with proper positioning, for maximum damage.

The monster screeched and thrashed each time, but the strength of its strikes were greatly diminished by her compromising position. It's something we'd decided before, the monster lacking hands for grabbing, the tentacles too slippery as well. Flaze had worried that our blows would only slide of the slime, so she volunteered to hold it down, while I went berserk on the motherfucker, my gambit activated each time.

The monster, dazed, decided to finally use its fire breath. The real Flaze immediately fell back, and I tripped the Slobber by the heel before I also ran.

Behind me, Clone Flaze had stayed and gotten on top of the Slobber. She took out her sword, and struck it right into the monster's throat.

The Slobber breathed fire even as it choked, and Clone Flaze was set ablaze, but she didn't let the heat beat her down. Instead, Flaze Clone stayed on top of the monster and clung to its form, allowing herself to burn. She grabbed the remnants of her shield, and used it to return the favor for all the times the Slobber had smashed her, the ethereal woman's chest heaving as her flaming form struck repeatedly against the monster's gooey body. A wet splat resounded each time, even in the heat of the fire, myself and the real Flaze participating with our ranged attacks. Hellfire balls for me, and shockwaves from her squire form for Flaze. All while the monster gurgled and gagged on Clone Flaze's long and melting sword, the latter having no intention at all of taking it out. Not until she died.

And she did. The both of them collapsed into a heap, one burned, the other smashed. Both dead.

[You have defeated a Level 59 Warrior!]

[Your Level Has Risen to 42!]

Wow Flaze. You're really using the apocalypse to discover yourself. I neighed.

"Yeah!" She shouted from further back, also laughing, genuine cheer in her voice. "I'll try it on you next!"