The last thing Artemis could remember was Butler and Holly running towards him, but it was too late. In truth, he hadn’t expected Holly to get his hint about the clone, but he was impressed none the less.
He opened his eyes, one brown, one blue and stared up at the forest canopy. Artemis frowned; he was most certainly not in LEP headquarters nor was at home. He wasn’t in the Fowl grounds, and no one was to be seen. Fog swirled around him, making the forest seem more sinister.
Standing, he brushed the dirt off his jacket. His questions could wait until he found civilisation.
He stumbled through the trees though the ground was uneven, and his loafers were not built for this kind of stress. He caught site of a body. The closer he got the clearer it became that the body was humanoid and disembowelled.
Nausea swept through him as he knelt in front of the body. Fangs? Odd… they could be a realistic prosthetic. He checked the man’s pulse. Nothing. No beat.
He felt the gums, the fangs were retractable and there was no sign of any surgery. Maybe it was a sub-species of some description, could it be…
Vampires were mythical creatures just as fairies were so it would stand to reason that vampires could be real too. As soon as he made it back to Fowl manor he would look into it, but for now… He needed to avoid whatever had killed this man.
A machete lay in the man’s slack hand. Artemis looked at it then grabbed it, gingerly. It was like Butler said, ‘best to be prepared’.
He continued into the forest carrying the bloodied machete.
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He only encountered more bodies lying in eerie silence. A feeling was beginning to churn in his gut, this wasn’t right. Where was he?
He heard a rustle and turned just in time to a see the snarling rabid thing hurtling towards him. After a moment he unfroze and pushed it off him with surprising ease. He scrambled away before looking back in the direction of his assailant.
His stomach dropped. A woman with fangs and claws half crawled towards him, her legs had been severed at the knee leaving her to use her remaining limbs to clumsily lumber forward at a snail’s pace.
However, he knew if she managed to get within an arm’s length of him, she could kill him with those sharp claws of hers.
He took a cautious step forward and jabbed the blade into her neck, she screamed and kept on crawling. How was she still functioning? Severing the brain from the body should dispatch the vampire. He tried to get close to retrieve the machete but was met with slashing claws which caused him to stumble back. He steeled himself and stepped forward and wrenched the machete from her neck. He backed away again coming away with sharp bleeding gashes down his face and arms. He swung for her head, sending it rolling away.
She stilled… He let out a breath and let his shoulders sag in relief. What a mess. He looked at the blood on his shaking hands then at the body on the floor.
He needed to keep going.
He stood and walked. And walked.
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Night fell, and by some miracle he managed to avoid running into any more… he wasn’t sure what the proper term was for what those creatures were, but felt hesitant to call them vampires, it just made him feel a little ridiculous. He sighed; it would simply have to do.
He didn’t light a fire; he couldn’t risk it.
Slumping on the floor, he wrapped his arms around himself, “five, ten, fiveteen…”. Feeling drowsy from the blood loss and mentally exhausted from the events of the day, he drifted into a fitful sleep.
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The next few days represented a steep learning curve for Artemis, and he had come to realise a few things to be true about this place.
One: he discovered that everything here wanted to kill him.
Two: pretty much any creature he had encountered could be killed by beheading.
And three: if in doubt, run.
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Confusion and anxiety had become constant companions to him, the uncertainty of his whole situation was getting to him.
Currently, Artemis was slumped at the foot of a tree, trying to catch his breath. He had spent all morning running and he was going to get all the rest he could get.
He heard the crunch of leaves, turned and froze. He had never seen something so grotesque. Gorilla-wolves were unusual, and vampires were supernaturally fast, but neither were gruesome. It was humanoid and crouched on all fours. Its skin was mottled and riddled with wriggling worms and veins so prominent they were popping out of its skin. He was on all fours, growling lowly, his eyes of a pitch black.
‘All fours’ Artemis thought hysterically, ‘four is bad, four is death.’ He tapped five times on his leg to counter it. ‘Five was safe.’
Artemis took a step back.
The creature shook its eyes on him and briefly those pitch-black eyes bled of darkness leaving a natural brown, “You’re a human. a child… you shouldn’t be here.” The shaking intensified “I’m sorry…” its eyes returned to an inky black, and the creature pounced.
He jerked into action and swung, they rolled to the ground, grappling. The blade fell from his hand and the creature knelt over him. His hand skittered across the dirt, hand blindly searching for his lifeline. His palm finds purchase on the handle and he swings.
The body fell on top of him limp. He rolled it off him, wrinkling his nose.
That was the first time anyone had said anything to him in…. he wasn’t sure, weeks?
The monster had seemed remorseful, but it had appeared to lose control. The twinge of guilt he felt for killing the creature was quickly replaced with annoyance. What was this, Twilight?
His hands shook, that was close. He really should have listened to Butler more.
He felt his chest constrict and he sank to the floor next to the body. Breath, needed to breath. count, he could count his breaths, one, two, three, four, five. He stopped counting. Five was good, five was safe.
He stood; the body would be descended on by scavengers by sunset. It was getting darker, he needed to find somewhere to rest.
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Artemis woke to a sound. He scrambled to his feet, clutching his blade
He was pinned to the ground, flailing gracelessly all the while. Suddenly the mess of gnashing teeth and claws were off him. A man had tackled his attacker to the ground then proceeded to cut its head off with a weapon fashioned from a sturdy wooden stick with jagged bits of bone strapped to it along its length. In a flash the man had dispatched the other vampires.
Artemis struggled to his feet to face the man. He was large and fanged, wearing a moth bitten black coat and a shirt that had once been white but was now flecked with grime and blood.
The man rounded on him retracting his fangs, speaking in a southern American drawl, “What? Not gonna thank me for saving your life?”
Artemis stayed silent, unsure. He kept his eyes on the man, fully aware of how quicky he could be killed.
The man sighed, “Relax, I’m not gonna kill you.” He took a step closer which sent Artemis scrambling back. The man backed off and held his hands up in placating gesture “Okay, okay. I’ll just stay here, see, not moving.” The man sat where he was in a bid to seem less threatening, “You can call me Benny by the way…”
Artemis looked at him trying to decide whether he should run or not. “Artemis” he said.
Benny sat back, an easy smile softening his features, “How’d you end up here Artemis? You’re an awful long way from home.”
Artemis relaxed but kept tight grip on his blade, “Where-… where is this exactly?”
This garnered a dumbfounded stare from Benny, “You don’t know where you are?” Artemis shook his head. Benny raised an incredulous eyebrow, “Do you know how hard it is for a human to get here?” he laughed “And you got here by accident, that is priceless.”
Artemis’ jaw tightened minutely, prickles of irritation needling at him, “That does not answer my question.” He said, his voice hard despite the thin veil of calm he tried to hide it behind “Where are we?”
Benny still seemed amused, “Purgatory, the place where all us monsters end up when we die.”
Artemis started, “So… am I dead?”
Benny shook his head, “If you were dead, you would be in Heaven or Hell.”
“Do you really expect me to believe that Heaven is a real place” Artemis said derisively.
Benny shrugged, “Believe it or not, that’s just what I’ve heard. Anyway, we are in purgatory, I don’t see why that’s any more ridiculous.”
A silence followed as Artemis tried to digest this. A thought struck him, “The ones that attacked me, were they you friends?”
“They were my friends, now you’re my friend.” Benny said
“And why is that?” Artemis said, feeling thoroughly perturbed by the vampire’s flippancy.
“You’re my way out of this hellhole. I can get us out into the real world.” said Benny.
“So, just how do you intend to do that” said Artemis, who was finally at ease now he understood why he wasn’t dead, now understood what this was. This was a transaction and he understood transactions. Understanding of a situation led to the ability to hold greater agency, and greater control could be key to survival.
“This place was made to cage all the monsters of the world; it doesn’t want you here. At the first opportunity it’ll spit you out. There’s a portal, a human portal. Now, I’m just close enough to human I might be able to hitch a ride. You’d just have to carry my soul to the other side.” said Benny.
“Am I just supposed to take you at your word?” asked Artemis distrustfully.
“Basically, yeah.”
“And how do I know I won’t end up like your friends” Artemis gestured to the body on the floor.
“You don’t. First rule of purgatory kid, you can’t trust nobody.”
“You just asked me to trust you” Artemis said.
“You see? You’re getting it now.” Benny said with a smile that was all teeth. “Now, what do you say? Are you in?”
It took a moment for Artemis to realise that Benny was asking his consent. Artemis nodded slowly, “Yes, I would find that arrangement… agreeable”
Benny frowned at him, “Do most kids talk like that now or are you just weird? The last time I was on earth was about, fifty years ago.”
“You could say I am unusual in comparison to my peers” Artemis said
“So, what did you do? Kill a leviathan? Must have been some stunt to break your way in here,” said Benny curiously.
“You would never believe me and even if you did it is a long story, and not one I have the inclination to tell.” Said Artemis, not really in the mood to have this conversation
“If you say so.” Benny said, standing with an ‘oof’. “We’d better get a movin’, all sort of critter will be after us soon. When word spreads of a human in purgatory, everything’ll want a chunk of you.”
“Lovely thought” Artemis said sardonically. He began to tap in multiples of five against his leg. “What is a ‘leviathan’ anyway?”
Benny grinned, “I’ll tell you if I see one ‘cause then at least you can know what’s gonna kill you.”
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After an hour of walking in a tense silence Benny tapped Artemis on the shoulder, putting a finger to his lips and pointing out into the forest.
Artemis nodded in understanding adjusted his grip on the machete, ‘here we go’ he thought.
A group of four vampires emerged from the tree line and rushed Benny who was able to most of them at bay with his claws and quick reflexes. Artemis beheaded two, leaving Benny to wrestle with the other pair.
Artemis heard a twig snap behind them and spun.
A vampire was approaching Benny from behind at an alarming pace. Benny had just finished dispatching his assailants and was completely unaware of the vampire hurtling towards him. The vampire bowled Benny to the floor and Artemis took his head off while he was grappling with Benny. The body fell to the forest floor next to a slightly shaken Benny.
Artemis offered him a hand up and Benny accepted it with a surprised “Thanks”.
Artemis looked at him, “What?”
Benny shrugged, “Didn’t expect you to stick around to save my hide. Specially as we barely know each other.”
“Well, I was hardly going to let you die; you know where the portal and you did save my life earlier.”
“Also didn’t expect you to be any good with a blade,” said Benny
Artemis gave him a withering glare then deflated, “Fair enough” he said sounding defeated.
“You’re holding it wrong by the way. You’ll strain your wrist if you keep swingin’ like that.” He gestured towards the blade that Artemis held in a death grip. “Can I?” Artemis nodded. Benny reached out and adjusted Artemis grip then nodded to himself “Feel better?” Benny asked.
Artemis gave an experimental swing, “Much better.” He looked up at Benny, “Thank you.” He said the word feeling foreign on his tongue.
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Soon the sun began to dip in the sky, bathing the trees in an orange haze.
Benny slowed to a stop, “We should sleep in shifts, everything in purgatory is hunting us. You should grab a few hours; I’ll take first watch.”
Artemis eyed him suspiciously.
Benny rolled his eyes, “What? Just because I’m a vampire you think I can’t be trusted.” he crossed his arms “You know what I hate most about being a vampire? The prejudice. Everyone thinks that just because vampires drink blood we’ll rip out people throats when they’re sleeping.”
Artemis raised an eyebrow, “Have you ripped out anyone’s throat when they were sleeping?”
Benny waved the question away, “That is completely beside the point.”
“Right, nothing untoward, you’re just going to watch me sleep.” Artemis said his voice dripping with sarcasm.
Benny sighed, “Look, If I wanted you dead you would be. I can’t get though the escape hatch to earth without a human with a soul, that means a live human. Does that make you feel better?”
“That was you trying to make me feel better?” Artemis said
“Did it work?” asked Benny
“No”
“Oh”
“That was terrible. Never try that again.”
“Noted.”
Artemis curled up on the forest floor sparing Benny a glance who was slumping against a tree.
“Thanks for...” Artemis seemed at a loss “Watching me while I sleep. I tried to make it sound less creepy but that would be impossible.”
Benny loosed an amused huff, “G’night Kid.”
Artemis continued to tap out multiples of five against his leg till he fell asleep.