"Say that again?"

Oh come on don't pretend you did not hear it. I asked whether you wanted to join my harem and all you do is stare the fuck at me? Come on. How hard is it to say yes?

Seriously. I am an OPMC and I am asking a question. Which the clear answer to it should be, "Yes!"

She still waits for me to repeat myself. I am tempted to slap her now, but that would be bad. I don't think harem masters are supposed to slap their harem, unless its for kinky stuff.

Ya, kinky stuff. I drool just thinking about them kinky stuff. The last time I had kinky stuff was so, so, so damned long ago.

I look at Archmage Fran's bewildered expression. I wonder whether she is a closet kink, yknow with the whole tall tower, dark lighting and dim room. She has to be a closet kink. That long slit at the side, is that a kink too? Maybe it should be.

She stares.

I stare back.

Does she want a staring contest? Because I will win staring contests.

I stare.

She turns to the side, her face red.

Yay! I win!

"Uhm... what did you say again?" She asks, she now leans against the wall, as I step a little closer. So I can stare a bit better.

Oh yes, she is insisting I repeat myself. Very well, since she is a pretty lady I will repeat.

"Would you like to join my harem?"

She stares at me again. I look into her gorgeous emerald eyes, and her face blushes.

"Are.. are you serious?"

Wait. Is she playing hard to get? I think she is, so I assume so. Well, the way to counter hard to get is... to be, more upfront.

"Yes. Of course. I would like you to join my harem."

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

She shakes her head, her long hair twirls with it. Oooh, that must be magic. I bet she uses magic to make her hair twirl like a hair shampoo commercial. But dayum it really makes her look good.

"No one goes around asking people to join harems!"

Oh.

They, don't?

"For one, all great sultans with harems have a palace and have a lot of money so that the harem members live a life of luxury and comfort!"

Hmm, good point. No one would join a harem if it meant hard, laborious work in uncomfortable settings. It is like how there are no harems in mines or caves.

"Okay, so if I get money and a palace will you join my harem?"

She looks at me, her expression even more bewildered. She looks at me from top to bottom.

"And if you are not so ugly."

I am ugly? Really? I look around the room and see a mirror. I see myself, a tall, buff man, with sharp chiseled features. Pretty much tall, dark and handsome!

But hey, physical appearances is malleable anyway. At least, the male physical appearance. I snap a finger, and poof, my body changes into an even more tall, dark and handsome man!

She pauses, and she blushes. "Uh.. okay. You still need money, and a palace, and maids and servants! A harem needs servants!"

"How much are you talking about?"

"At least 100,000 gold, a palace the size of the King's, and ten servants for every girl!"

Hmm, she's giving numbers. I like her.

I snap, and a magical parchment appears before me.

"Sign. You agree to join my harem member if I have at least 100,000 gold, a palace equal to the King's and ten servants for you."

She stops, picks up the parchment, reads it. And stares at all the fine print. I like a girl that reads her fine prints, it fits an archmage to go through documents in detail. Once you sign, its too late to lawyer up.

"How about a life of peace and quiet! A harem must have peace such that the harem can enjoy themselves. And good food, good wine, and good entertainment!"

Ooo a woman that knows what she wants. I like that too!

I snap my finger, and a few more sentences appear in the parchment. The definitions are accordingly updated as well, all good agreements have explanations and definitions after all, and I only do good agreements.

She reads to revised terms and she nods.

"Yeah that sounds about right."

"Good. Sign it."

A magical pen pops up in front of her, and she grabs it and signs it.

And once she signs it, a magical blue seal appear and stamps over her signature, sealing the said contract.

"Great, happy to come to an agreement. The terms are reasonable, I will be able to fulfill it in about a month or so. Please wait here."

"Wait. What?" She looks at me, bewildered.

"Huh?"

"What have I done?" She walks around the room. "Why did I even sign the contract!"

A magical parchment appears, its the contract she signs earlier. The wonders of contract magic, copies are automatically made for all signing parties.

"I annul! I cancel!" She yells, her magic pours into her attempt to reject her signing.

And a magical hand slaps her magic away.

"You should not bother. The contract is sealed with Divine tier magic."

Her eyes open, "Divine tier? How is that possible????"

"Look at me, look at your regular man. Back at me. Everything is possible, when you are an OP Main Character. "

A jingle appears. La La La La La~