I’ve finally found what was that noise which drove me crazy. My cell had another inmate, one of the importunate kind, that I never had the chance to see in my previous life.

How would I, I was such a noble lady, coddled and pampered, in a wonderful mansion so large and containing so many rooms that I had only ever known a handful of them and had explored even fewer.

And it's not like the servant quarters were part of it.

A mouse, actually, I’d rather say a whole family, was living in the hay of the cell. We surprised them the very same day I met Finn, when he was further cleaning the mess I had made out of my cell’s floor. He accidentally found their nest and scared them away.

They were not the only ones, I was frightened as hell, when they ran out of their newly discovered hiding place, escaping in search of a new one.

I finally let my emotion run wild and screamed, like any good little girl of high status would have. Yet, as dirty as it may sound, later, I learned to accept and appreciate their presence.

It was all thanks to Finn, like everything else, everything was always thanks to him. Defending their position, saying that they had no choice but to live the life they were given.

And if it was unnecessary to care for them, since they were still carriers of disease and ate our grain. There was no need to be afraid of them, nor to see them as anything but vermin.

Because this would at best push us to look at the rest of the world in the same way. At worst, especially in our case, it would only make our feelings of loss and despair even worse.

And he didn’t want us to belittle others nor that we demean ourselves.

He said that pretty much every girl here disliked or even hated the mice, seeing them only as one more nuisance that reminded them of an already hopeless situation. That only brought them dark thoughts.

So he tried to change the image they had of them in a better one. He made the girls acknowledge the mice ‘will to live’ despite their doomed situation from birth. He bringed out their cuteness, which could never equal or even get close to a girl’s in her darkest moment.

He pointed out that if they successfully struggled without even knowing hope, we should be able to do the same without losing it.

If we had the time and means to dislike them, we might as well direct that rage toward those who robbed us from everything and forced us to associate with them. For those who refused to die had to stay strong.

If we had the time and means to dislike them, we might as well direct that rage toward those who robbed us and forced us to cohabit with them. For the one who didn't want to die, we must stay strong.

I honestly think that this whole speech was merely an attempt to be a smooth talker, and flirt, but in the end, it seems I’ve made new friends.

I was kept alone for quite stupid reasons. And this family of mice was my only company when Finn was not here. It took me some time but after a while they got used to my presence and allowed me to approach them to feed them.

Even though they disturbed me every now and then when I was asleep, I too got used to their presence, and feeding them turned out to be more interesting than expected.

Fin was right, they were quite cute.

…

Thus started my new life, confined in an unfamiliar bandit's hideout, away from everything and everyone, even from my own kidnaper. Finn said that I would never see their face unless they finally decided to keep me for themselves.

He said that I was safe for the time being, because they were fortunately idiots and easily influenceable.

…

Finn was rather busy all day long, from before dawn to the late afternoon. Every lunchtime he would stop by my cell to give me my meal and look after me.

He couldn’t afford to spare me more time during the day, however, the situation was not unbearable. To make up for this, he would often spend his break time, and pretty much all his evening, with me.

His attendance was pleasant and comforting, it always gave me a feeling of security and serenity despite the fact that my situation could turn sour at any moment.

He took great care of me, and always stayed until the end, patiently waiting for me to fall into slumber before leaving. Very quickly, because I was beginning to grow attached to his presence, I started to postpone the fateful hour as long as possible.

But he realized straight away my goal, and put an end to my selfish attempt to desperately monopolize him. He made me give up at once, using his own very effective method, whispering sweet words of threats.

“Now now, bad girl, if you persist in forcibly staying awake just to monopolize my attention, I will have to punish you. I might be unable to let you sleep at all by then, and would be coerced to refrain from visiting you. Be nice, and sleep, I promise that this will in no way reduce our time spent together.”

“Moreover, you must rest if you want to remain beautiful. If you lost your shine and began to look like any other ordinary slave, I would no longer care for you, and the men might lose their restrain.”

He was right, I had to keep my charming figure and pretty body in top notch condition, If I ever wished to make my dream come true…

After this event, I almost always fell asleep immediately after the dinner, without any fuss and while listening to his voice, abandoning my precious time with him, for the sake of his other business.

It saddened me, but he kept his promise and even increased our overall time together in the end. He would secretly come back for a whole part of the night while I was asleep, and lay by my side.

In these moments, all my nightmares would fade away, and my dreams would only become stronger. I was certain it was thanks to him, even in my deepest sleep, I could sense his presence beside me, I could feel his warmth.

Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.

When it was time for the sun to rise, he was no longer there. Yet the traces remained, a still warm straw surface too wide for one, imbued with his lingering scent, a blanket pulled up over my shoulders to my neck so I don't catch cold, a basin of freshwater, food…

And all these little attention that could only come from him. Not to mention the fact that I never woke up on these nights, which would never happen to me otherwise.

I got used to the situation. As to why he never let me know, perhaps it was so as not to appear oppressive or to scare me, I’m sure he didn't hold back from enjoying it a little. But I would rather lean toward a simple reasoning, he had other women to take care beside me, I didn't blame him.

…

“Finn… I’m hungry.” “I will give you a reserve of bread to hide, just be careful to your figure miss.”

“Finn… I’m scared.” “Don’t be, I swore on my life I wouldn’t let them lay a single finger on you.”

“Finn… I’m lonely.” “So do I, would you like to be my friend? So we might have dirty talk.”

“Finn… I’m frightened.” “Fret not princess, this knight will conquer all your fears.”

“Finn… I don't feel well.” “Torments or pains? I will take care of everything.”

“Finn… stay, please never leave me.” “At your command my queen. ”

“Finn… I can’t fall asleep.” “Close your eyes, I'll tell you a story. ”

“Finn… I fear you'll disappear.” “Then I’m not leaving.”

“Finn… I wanna cry.” “What's holding you back?”

“Finn… I …” “There, let me wash your tears.”

“Finn… I would like to.” “As your wish.”

“Finn… could you?” “Yes, I will.”

“Finn…” “shhh, I’m here.”

Step by step, I grew up completely dependent on Finn as our exchanges progressed. I may not have the choice as far as my needs were concerned. But it came to the point where I could no longer live without him.

I realized something was wrong and that I had to put an end to this, to refrain myself, but I chose to do otherwise.

I fell in love.

“Finn… What are you so kind?” “To please the girls. Why else?”

“Finn… what am I to you?” “My most delicate and precious flower.”

“Finn… Am I pretty?” “Very, the prettiest, I wish I could eat you whole.”

“Finn… why me?” “Who knows? Would you prefer it to be someone else?”

Finn… do you love me? That, I never asked, I already knew very well about his heart, and the other girls who lived there next to me, each in their own fragment. I was sick, madly in love, and it didn't matter.

The more time went by, the crazier I became. Let’s not even talk about him being my knight, he was already my prince…

At that time, dangerous thoughts began to fill my mind. If only I could be that someone else, a simple girl without background, a mere slave among others…

No, that wouldn’t have done the trick and I would’ve gone unnoticed, but something in between… Perhaps I could’ve forced myself deeper into his murky heart and would fulfill my wish until the end.

I was not satisfied with the situation, I wanted him to be mine, not mine alone, I didn't ask for that much, but I wished he could embrace me. But that was hoping for the impossible, beyond all reason. Because I was not so simple that any man could be my partner.

and yet Perhaps to reassure me, or In my greatest selfishness and from the depths of my darkest desire, my inner demons almost made me hope that my kidnappers would take action, unable to wait any longer and involve Finn.

Finn kept saying he was going to save me, and I knew he strongly believed in his word, but I was no longer the same naive little girl, as much as I had faith in him, I was under no illusion and understood very well it was not an easy thing.

I knew my mother would eventually find me, and she would punish anyone closely related to the case. And if Finn’s true affiliation could still be discussed and his life spared, the moment he would truly put his hand on me, no matter what I would say, she would also kill him.

Perhaps to reassure me, or In my greatest selfishness and from the depths of my darkest desire, my inner demons almost made me hope that my kidnappers would take action, unable to wait any longer and involve Finn.

However, saying that it was an unlikely situation would be disillusioned. I was truly terrified, and no matter how much my imagination went wild, I would never actually hope for it to happen.

I just couldn’t distance myself from those fears that twisted my stomach and this was only my subconscious way of fighting them.

I was scared that they might actually act and that everyone would die due to my foolishness. Because I couldn't help myself from running away.

I was scared I would lose the only two people who mattered to me, Finn as well as my trust and love for my mother if he were to die.

I was afraid he would blame me for his death, that he would hold me responsible, he would be right.

That's why, one day, I suddenly asked him to vow he would be the first in case I was ill fated. I truly wanted to give him something for once, a last and only gift before his death.

Even if it wouldn’t prevent him from holding me accountable. Even if I were to never remember this moment. As long as it pleased him a little, and reduced my pain in the moment..

because he would die, anyone would, perhaps, even the whole country would meet a disaster.

For the reason that I took after my mother, and that if my madness could lead me to have such thoughts, my mother’s one could very well result in the world's demise. Knowing her, she might as well erase all traces, including my memory.

That's how my mother was, a terrifyingly mighty existence above the law of the world. Sometimes I even wondered if she couldn't just ignore divine commands and do as she wanted. After all, emperors and popes bowed to her request.

She would not think twice before annihilating any potential problem that might reach me and take me home pronto, so what about an illicit relationship, a bond already too strong to be severed.

Fortunately, I didn’t prioritize my spoiled whims over countless innocent lives, and my self proclaimed knight hadn’t let me down yet, remaining true to himself, he was definitely doing his best for my sake, desperately trying to save myself.

That’s why, mom, please hurry up. I don’t want to lose my unique friend, and first love. I don’t want innocent to die, I don’t want anyone to suffer in my stead, I am even ready to give up on him, so please…

What kind of princess would I be If I let my shiny white knight lose his hard-earned splendor and glory?

All the while praying for the fateful moment to never arrive, and for my mother to step in, deep down I still hoped that she never found me and that finn endeavor would succeed without help.

He deserved full recognition for his effort, and maybe I could always try to convince my mother to keep him beside me as a friend at least, if he exceeded all expectations.

Allowing me to perhaps elope with him some other time after I made him completely fall under my charm…

Still, I wondered how my first time would be if he had to forcefully take it. If he was the only one involved, I admit that the idea of trying my luck remained. He wasn't innocent after all and I may be not able to convince my mother any more, I might be able to negotiate his place as a pet this time, by threatening my mother with suicide.

narrator’s note to himself : Never get on this girl's good side, whoever she is.