His lips crush into mine. “I’ll make you.” He breathes in my mouth, his tongue tracing along my lips. I bite his lip, licking in afterward. He tastes like magic. His lips are warm, so easy to get lost in. Kissing him is like discovering a new place, feeling your heart flutter with a new image to be put in a diary once back home. His eyes are closed but I know if they were open, I would moan at the sight of the seafoam.
Like by magic, he opens his eyes and falls back a bit, looking at me mercilessly. He has something in mind, I am just too much of a coward to see it. His eyes are the color of the sea we passed in the truck back in the Unseelie Court. That’s where the color comes from - the deadly shores of the Isles. I don’t know why, but this makes my stomach’s heat grow and I am crazed by the desire, knocking on my door. I push myself against him, kissing him once more.
His hands don’t lose their grip on my wrists, on the contrary, they seal them. He sticks his body to mine, so hard, it’s difficult to breathe. I feel crushed by his weight.
I lose myself in his mouth, as he opens it, letting our tongues meet. It’s a fight, like everything else between us. He pushes it inside, swirls it with mine, exploring my front teeth. I let out a breath, opening my mouth wide.
Finally, one of his hands lets go of my wrist. I grab his hair, pulling him closer. When I touch his nape, Kaytus moans quietly. The soft noises he makes as he kisses me make my head spin. He lets go of my other wrist, and his hand meets my chin. He lifts my head up, locking our eyes.
His lips are red and lush, as he pants. He is a breath away from me, scanning my face. I gasp, as he kisses me again. His hands find their way to my waist, holding me tightly in place. I feel the towel about to fall, but at this point, I don’t care. Shameless, I tell myself. What are you doing, Norella?
I jump up, holding him closer, putting my arms around his neck. He lowers his head, to kiss my ear, down to my neck, embracing every inch of my skin. It makes me let out a breath. I’m afraid to use my voice, afraid that if I talk, if I moan, the time will start again. Reality will hit me.
Kaytus’s kisses leave wet trails on my neck, goose-skin appearing due to the cold air. One of his hands travels down to my outer thigh, gripping it. I make him grip harder. So hard it leaves marks. I bite his lip and kiss the corner of his mouth, as tenderly as I can manage. I continue to pepper kisses on the side of his mouth, going up to the scar, thin and nearly healed, but still visible. I feel it with my tongue, as I kiss it softly. As to say forgive me, forgive me.
Kaytus’s hands find my cheeks, squeeze them, as he pulls me closer. I keep my eyes closed, feeling him, like I’ve never felt anyone before. I smell his scent, poisonous, like his mouth, like those hands gripping me for dear life.
He licks my lip, and in one swift motion, puts his hand on my chest. The towel is about to drop, but he holds it close, hiding me. I open my eyes, to see him gazing in turn. His lips are parted. I bite his shoulder, tasting his skin. It’s sweet, clean after a long bath he must have taken before. I kiss it, I lick it, I mutter a soft yes.
He lets me worship him with kisses, but soon, he grabs my hand and puts it on his chest. I feel the muscles, his beating heart - as quick as mine. He is burning hot, and I feel I’m about to fall into the pit I so desperately avoided. His yearning gaze makes me weak in my knees.
So, I push him towards the bed, with each step, my confidence growing. He doesn’t speak, plumping on the edge. I settle in his lap, my face inches away from his. He nuzzles my barely hidden breasts. His hands travel down my legs, his fingertips glazing my skin smoothly.
Suddenly, he kisses me once again - harder, meaner. He pushes me to the bed and towers above me. His towel disregarded long ago. I look up, exposing my long neck.
“Submit,” he growls. It turns me into an animal. I have one instinct and there is nothing pure left. My face grows hot, as well as the pool between my legs. I grab the towel's edge and pull it away.
Kaytus’s eyes widen, as he licks his lips at the sight of my naked body underneath him. I know it makes him feel things. I know I have an effect on him - and that is enough to put a smile on my face.
“No,”
I don’t deserve anything good after what I’ve done. He may be the catalyst but everything was still my choice. And I picked badly. Now, I glare at him, and yet, I feel the sickly attraction to the killer. It’s blooming inside of me and threatens to explode. The position we are in is so mystical, I feel like I’m gonna find release any second, without him even touching me.
He dives toward me, sucks on the side of my neck. I let out a moan, to hell with reality hitting me in the face. I like what’s going on. I like the power it gives me. I like hearing him groan. I like his thirst and I like mine.
I scratch his back, hoping my nails leave marks. I hope he feels the pain, as my nails trace along his spine. I hope he feels mortality when he is with me. He kisses my ear and his finger travels to the oval of my breast.
I whisper his name, breathless, as he touches the perked up nipple. It’s sensitive and what he’s doing is cruel. Slow movements, not enough fire in them. I push him forward, and he finds himself in a lying position. I move forward, back to his lap, kissing him repeatedly, each time harsher, more demanding. I bite his lip hard, praying he bleeds.
“Beg for it,” he whispers into my mouth.
“Never,” I answer, and suck on his neck. My fingers touch his abdomen, trying to capture every curve, every bump in my memory. His lap feels created specifically for me. As if I was born to find my place on his thighs.
I feel raw power emanate from his hitched breaths and groans. I know he feels it too. I wish he talked more. I wish he tried to kill me right now before it went too far. Before I let myself go too far. Because I know something about the Fae folk. They do not love the way we do. They take and they take until their prey has nothing left but their gift. They leave you bloodless and filled to the brim with their seed. If it were to go this far, if Kaytus were going to complete this dark ritual, I would be bound to him forever. Not with some spell, but because of my human nature. So easily swayed. So easily brought to the brink. I would be a slave to his desires, and it shouldn’t excite me, but it does.
He pushes me to the side, my head nearly hitting the headboard. I watch him clap and my arms fly to the sides, blocked by an invisible force. I cannot move them, struggling against the shackles. A groan leaves my mouth, as he approaches. His fingers slide to my underpants, touching the heat there, but not enough for me to feel anything. I moan, breathing hard.
“Beg,”
I can almost hear him saying ‘You will beg for my touch when the time comes’ back when he was undercover at the palace. If he had told me this, I would have laughed in his face, angry and shocked at such vulgarity.
I shake my head, not moving my gaze from his hands. Veins adorn his pale hand, his long and slim fingers, dancing around my pussy. I shove my head back, into the headboard and groan in discontent.
“Please,” I mutter, feeling the heat grow. It’s becoming unbearable and I try to use my own magic to liberate myself from the shackles. But nothing works, I know zero spells of this nature. I am caged, under his influence, ready for whatever demise he has for me.
It’s like I’ve never felt fear. Nothing scares me anymore but a broken promise of a release.
“Louder,” his lips are at mine, barely touching. I stick out my tongue, trying to taste him. He pulls away, letting his hands discover my curves.
“Please, Kaytus,” I moan, struggling to see straight. I hate myself more than I hate him. I hate how weak I am under his hungry eyes. I hate the way he makes me throb. I hate just how much I want to be filled with his gift. Monstrous and delicate at the same time, he imprisoned me on this bed. So, I whine, “By the spirits, Kaytus, please, I beg you!”
The everpresent spark in his seafoam suddenly turns into a pyre. He unshackles me with a click of his fingers and takes off his pants. He is agile, already on top of me, in all his glory. Heat rises to my cheeks, but I cannot turn away. How could I ever turn away? I would be such a fool. He said he didn’t inherit the agility of the Fae, but he must have learned it, because his movements are precise, graceful.
“You drive me crazy,” he whispers and takes off my undergarments in one swift motion. Again, I gasp at his precision. There are no setbacks, no hesitation. Every move is calculated, like he already knows me. There is no fear. I never knew I liked it in men.
“You are despicable, murderous, lying-” he pushes inside me. It shuts me up. He is thick, burning up my insides. I cannot control the guttural sounds leaving my mouth.
I open my eyes, reminding myself to watch. I need to see his face. I need to see it while it’s distorted in pleasure.
“Princess, princess…” He whines against me, his face in the crease of my collarbone. “Norella,”
I gasp at the sound of my name. The sound of it on his lips is majestic. I grab his face in one hand, squeezing his chin and jaw tightly. I make him watch as the princess of Malachite dies underneath him, in the sweetest way.
“Your princess gives you pleasure,” I bark, the fire in my soul insatiable. It wants to spill out. It wants to devour the whole world and us with it. “Remember that well.”
Kaytus bites my thumb, drawing blood, and picks up his pace. The bed thuds under the pressure, and my back lifts from the mattress. One of his hands grip my thigh and claws at it, like an animal.
“Your sworn enemy is filling you up like you’ve never been,” he snides, pushing his cock into my core, making me scream. “Remember that, princess.”
By the spirits I am losing my mind.
There is no escape from this spell.
The darkness he offers is too good to refuse.
I will burn in hell for eternity for this blasphemy.
“You will submit, maybe not now, but soon,” he groans against my ear, pounding hard. My head keeps hitting the headboard but I am too far to even feel it. “Because you want it as much as I do, princess. Because the power you feel from this is what no one else can give you. I assure you of that.”
I moan, bucking my head back, exposing my neck.
A noise outside the room breaks us out of the passion.
We turn our heads to the door, and see shadows approaching. Footsteps on the other side of the hall and whispers. We look at each other and he pulls out. Swiftly he pulls back his undergarments and pants. I put my panties back, and wrap a towel around me.
They are here.
Has the revolution tracked us down here? That would mean we’re on the hit list of both the kingsguard and August’s men. Adrenaline slithers through me, awakening something ancient inside of me. I feel foreign energies take over my body. My fingers burn with powers I thought were unreachable.
I run to the dresser and grab my backpack. Kaytus gets to the door and listens in. The steps hurry towards us. We both know what has to be done. If we attack now it’s official warfare. They’ve sealed their fate.
The door bangs open, but Kaytus is already far. He stands, bare chest, red marks all over his body, ready to strike. I don’t wait for the agents to enter, I already summon vines, interlocking their feet together. They cannot move, and Kaytus throws two knives right into their faces. The agents fall, and I let the vines disappear.
We look at each other. The realization hits me like a ton of bricks.
Screams pierce the tavern and another pair of steps approach. I ready myself to fight, knowing very well one stab wound and I’ll be crawling in my own blood. I have no protection, and neither does Kaytus.
But my magic runs through my veins, it’s calling to me, begging me to be used. I am a weak-willed creature because I let it take over momentarily. I let out a guttural cry, sending fire on two agents, jumping over the corpses.
One manages to avoid the fireball, the other’s clothes are burning. He curses, panicked, and takes off his coat. I use this moment to dive into him, stabbing his gut several times. I feel like an animal, my eyes crazed with fury. Where it comes from, I have no clue.
Kaytus duels with the other one, blade against blade. The clanking sounds are all I hear. My ears ring when the agent I’ve stabbed a dozen of times falls on the ground. They stood no chance. I have taken an oath back at the Academy - promising Nature I would not inflict harm on others, I would not use my gift to harm.
But as I see Kaytus struggle with the agent, I conjure a rope and throw it around his neck, pulling hard. He chokes, and stumbles. My spy uses the momentum to slice the revolutionary’s throat. Blood splatters all over his face. The man falls dead.
Kaytus’s hands find my face, checking if I’m alright. I nod, turning to the open door. Hallway is our only exit. So, I grab Kaytus’s hand and leave the rented room. In the corridor numerous people stand, gaping at us. I hold my towel close, rushing through the crowd. They’re gasping, some squeaking, letting us pass.
On the first floor, everyone is standing in a corner, with two agents holding their swords at the ready. Kaytus whistles, and holding me from behind, leaps to the floor. We are barely hidden by the table.
We share one look and know what we must do. I throw a fireball to the shelf behind the counter filled with alcohol. It explodes in a second, and the flames push the agents to the ground. Kaytus grabs my hand and we run to the only room in here. The kitchens, where a servant cowers in fear. I ran to her, and asked, “Where did you put our clothes?”
She shivers and quickly points to a rack, where our clothes are drying. It smells of lavender here, mixed with burning alcohol and wood. We must leave now.
I grab my blouse and put it over my head, throwing the towel. Kaytus takes his shirt and vest and puts them on. I grab his cloak and throw it to him. We shudder at the awful feeling of wet and cold clothes on hot skin.
I put on my clean shoes, and see people running away from the fire. We run away too, finding ourselves in the dark of night, the town illuminated by the growing flames. When I see no agents leave the building, I call to water from the nearby rivers and lakes. I ask for it to calm the fires, to extinguish the burning rage.
Kaytus and I are already on the move, when the fire finally stops, and the ashes spread on the ground like early snow.
“How did they find us?” I ask, breathless. We stop only when the forest by the village becomes thick.
“No idea,” he says, looking around. I take the sleeve of my blouse and wipe his face. The wet cloth easily removes the drying blood. He grabs my hand, scanning my face. The heat is ever present, even if the fire subsided.
“About what happened,” he trails off. I look at him, unable to concentrate on anything but the fresh memories.
“How about we talk about it after we destroyed the HQ?” I suggest, unable to step away.
“Good idea,” he nods, not moving either. “Good…”
He kisses me. It’s quick, but holds the same amount of heat as a blazing volcano in Abrayam. I pull away, putting a finger on my mouth instinctively. His fingers meet his lips too. He looks down at me, his eyes blazing with the same eeriness I’ve learned to know.
“The headquarters are in Solen, a several-days-long hike,”
“We’ll need horses. We’ll never make it on time. The revolution attacked us, that means they have already seized the castle.”
“Not necessarily. It might be August’s revenge. He might have listened and pulled away his forces. But yeah, horses are a good idea. Self-driven carriages are even better.”
“Would he do so? You know him better than anyone,” I search for regret in his eyes. But I see none.
“He would catch his breath and assess the situation wisely, so to speak. I am sure he is calculating the odds,”
“What are the odds then?” I press forward.
“He is doomed to lose, without the Academy he so desired, and without me, his cause is as good as dead. However, he still is a very strong opponent,”
“He is mortal and we both possess magic. He doesn’t stand a chance.” My words are carelessly thrown into the cold air. Kaytus’s interest was piqued by my confidence.
“I cared for him a long time ago,” he states, watching the night sky. “I am biased.”
“I will kill him myself if it’s too difficult for you,” I snarl. “But you will not dissuade me from doing so.”
“I wasn’t planning to. He hurt you. I will not let him live.”
I glimpse at him and bite my lip. “He hurt you too. I won’t let him live either.”
Reading on Amazon or a pirate site? This novel is from Royal Road. Support the author by reading it there.
And with that, we head towards Solen, hoping to stumble upon a village kind enough to lend us their horses. It is too dangerous to sleep out in the wild. Now that I tasted him once, I will never be the same. And I think he knows it. Because when we start walking, he smiles wickedly, awakening the same passion from before inside me. I wish he could just take me here, on the cold soil, and destroy me.
The forest is thick - I can barely see in the dark. I braid my hair while taking step after step towards our destination. There is no time to waste. The treaty, the knights, the Academy, the revolutionaries… They’re all parts of the ticking clock.
I don’t have time to miss people I’ve lost, the minutes are passing, and I feel my blood boil. I have a goal: to shove them out of my path. With Kaytus by my side, with our magic energies joined, we could burn them all to ash. I glance at him, trying to push away the recent events from memory.
I underestimated him. I’ve lost myself in these games. I hope he lost himself just as much.
----------------------------------------
The sun is up, when we settle on the cold ground. I look at the sky and snowflakes settle on my lashes. Winter has come early this year. Kaytus summons a fire, and in a matter of seconds, it’s heating us enough for our clothes to finally feel comfortable to wear. Kaytus puts his dry cloak around my shoulders, avoiding my eyes.
“Try to sleep,” he says, exhaustion audible in his tone. I sigh and close my eyes. I have time. I have time before it all goes to hell, I know it. And yet, I can’t shake off the worry. Vivid images of death are freshly printed in my mind, and with difficulty, I manage to fall asleep.
Kaytus wakes me up with a wet kiss on my neck. I rise immediately, my body cranky from the uncomfortable position I’ve slept in. He looks at me, merely amused. I grit my teeth as I feel wet. Spirits. Not now. I don’t dare move.
“Kaytus,” I whisper, crossing my legs so he does not sense my arousal. This is torture.
His eyes are half-closed as he comes closer and his finger trails down my lips, to my chin, then to my neck. He breathes heavily before pulling away.
“Do not wake me up like this,” I mutter. He raises an eyebrow.
“How would you like me to wake you up?” At first, I think he is genuine, but then the sparkle returns to his eyes. I prepare myself to be played again, and again, and again, until I learn my lesson. “Like this maybe?” His fingers dance towards my thighs. I feel like he’s going to stop there, but he uses both hands to separate my legs. The man grows closer to my core and with one single finger he touches where I want to be touched most. I watch him in horror, praying this is not a test. Because I have already failed. “Or like this?” His hands grab my neck and push me to the ground hard. I grunt at the motion . He applies pressure, enough to make me feel a bit light-headed, but not enough to truly choke. I watch him through hooded eyes and realize I am but a plaything in his arms. And that’s okay. Everything is okay because he will never have an upper hand where it really matters: the crown. Everything else, he can have. My body, my innocence, my hatred, my admiration. If he wishes to own me wholly, he can choke on it.
Suddenly he lets me go, the fire in his eyes gone in an instant.
“Come on,” He hurries me up.
I roll my eyes and kick my feet angrily, forgetting to even try to act decent. To hell with this. I am in a foul mood now.
After a three hour hike through the valleys, we noticed a town. It’s lively, but battered. Some buildings are burnt and people shoo away from us. I wonder if they recognize me. After passing through multiple stables, we finally manage to rent a horse. It’s cheaper this way.
Kaytus helps me settle, and jumps in the saddle afterwards. He passes several sepha papers to the groom and we move out. I hold myself close to his warm body, sliding my hands around his waist.
His right hand holds the reins, while the other is seated on my thigh. He grips it, making sure I stay in place. I find the motion silly, but say nothing. The horse’s pace fastens and we end up galloping for quite some time. My hair is pulled back in a braid, so I can see everything around us. We pass through creeks, around lakes and by some smaller villages and towns. We take the main road, leading to the second biggest city of Malachite.
The man clicks his tongue, hurrying the horse. It picks up the pace, and I feel the utter strength of its legs. My hips move rhythmically, as I hold tight to his body. I put my cheek against his back, looking at my left, watching the trees pass. I notice deers and squirrels far away, looking at us.
“We’ll arrive soon enough,” Kaytus shouts, so I can hear.
“Be ready, the revolution will be waiting,” I shout back. Kaytus nods.
“I know!”
As if by magic, an arrow flies by us, barely missing. I gasp, the horse neighs and abruptly stops, the speed pushing us forward. Miraculously, Kaytus manages to stay seated, holding me back with his hand on my leg.
I look back and see four riders, spanking their horses to move faster. I tap our horse’s side, but it panics. Kaytus turns around, and has a second to assess the situation. He grabs me and pulls me closer, switching places. I manage to get to the front, holding the reins. He says something in Fae and the horse’s breathing calms. I sway the reins, making it start to fasten the pace. But the agents are too close already, we won’t get away, no matter how fast our horse is.
The pounding of hooves echo through the valley as I urge the horse to go faster. We hear angry shouts of the revolution at our tails. They close the distance with every passing moment. My heart is beating faster, as I shout for Kaytus to do something to change their course. We are too vulnerable like this, and we can’t risk getting off the steed either. Time is running short.
I barely look at the road, checking on Kaytus every other second. He conjured a bow and drew an arrow, turning in the saddle. The first arrow sails through the air, missing the group’s leader’s head by mere inches. The other strikes true, hitting a horse and causing it to stumble.
The group leaves the fallen agent on the ground, focusing their fire on us. I try to move the horse in zigzags, avoiding all the upcoming arrows. Suddenly I feel a flower smell surrounding us. Kaytus announces he has put up a barrier that will hold out for as long as he is concentrated on it.
One of the riders dodges another arrow and manages to catch us. He is right behind. Kaytus swings his sword, parrying a few arrows out of the way. The two sides clash, swords ringing against each other in a furious flurry of blows. Kaytus is strong, more skilled than anyone I have ever met. He disarms the rider and delivers a swift kick to his chest, while holding onto the saddle. The rider is sent flying backwards.
For a mere second I think we are out of danger. But Kaytus shouts, as the flower scent dissipates and an arrow hits our horse’s backside. The horse lets out a cry of pain and veers off course, throwing us from its back.
We hit the ground hard, Kaytus’s sword skittering out of reach. The remaining revolutionaries approach us, drawing their own swords. We stand up, our bones aching from the massive blow. I clench my fists, readying an attack. They don’t have time to get off their horses as I send a colossal wave of wind, causing the horses to get on their back legs and neigh. Kaytus says something in Fae and a million tiny slices appear on the agents’ skin. They bleed from all over, but I understand it’s not lethal. The final strike will come from me.
I run towards them, summoning a light sword, slicing their stomachs, as they scream in agony from the little cuts. Kaytus stands in the back, watching the gory scene. One destabilizing factor and the agents are nothing but cattle. The last one receives a punch in the gut after I’ve inflicted the stab wound.
“That’s for the horse, you son of a bitch!”
I shake my hand, hurting from the punch. Kaytus comes to me, glazing his fingers on top, lessening the strain. His healing is subtle, as a whisper. I do not feel the pain anymore.
“Let’s grab their steed,” Kaytus says. “That might send a message.” He looks around, taking in the bodies lying around. Guts are spilled in the grass, the agents’ faces stuck in fear until earth claims them.
“The blood spilled here sends one hell of a message, if you ask me,” I snarl, heading towards the horse.
The rest of the trip is silent. My hands tremble when Solen comes into view. We lessen the pace, taking a minute to eat a bit and drink some water. We are riding on our last supplies. We’ll have to buy some food once we’re in the city.
We hear a rustling of leaves. Kaytus looks up and my eyes follow. A creature of the forest. A stag. It’s a beautiful dark animal, its black eyes stuck on the man. He conjures a bow and an arrow and is ready to strike, but I slide my fingers against his hand, stopping him.
“We just ate, there is no use killing it.” Kaytus doesn’t budge, fingers still holding the arrow’s tip. His archery skills are unmatched, and I know if he strikes he won’t miss.
Kaytus inspects the antlers with a straight face. In a matter of seconds his face turns into a grimace. He hesitates and the stag walks away proudly, unaware its life depended on one single decision. The man doesn’t fire, even though he still can. I sigh in relief and continue munching on my bread.
Solen. A city named after one of our best architects, the woman, who brought incredible buildings to life. Her imagination was beyond anything we’ve seen in recent years. I always admired her work - some of the designs are being used to this day.
Kaytus seems unimpressed with my solemn expression. He must think I guessed the HQ was hidden in plain sight. A building, like any other, lost in the labyrinth of offices, shops and banks. Perhaps, I always knew they were smart, too smart for us, royals, to see. If only Father had been open minded, if only he was ready to share information, I wouldn’t be standing here now - facing our enemy. At least I am not alone.
The moment we pull the horse into the stables at the entrance, we hear people shouting. A mass of citizens have gathered in the streets, holding torches, signs and throwing trash on the ground. The minister of Solen has shut her doors and has not come out in days. People demand justice for their magic wielder children and bigger salaries. I stop in my tracks, watching the riot. It’s nowhere near civilized.
Kaytus slips closer to me, his fingers brushing against mine. I sigh painfully, looking at the scene. What has Father done…
“I can’t believe he didn’t want to help them. Or at least listen,” I say. The spy shakes his head, sliding his palms down his face.
“The ministers have always been corrupted, but this,” he sighs.
“We can’t pass, the roads are blocked.” The windows are all shut, people who stayed in their homes try to protect their property the best they can.
“We could wait until sundown. That will give us time to rest,”
“There’s no time to waste, and you know it,” I turn to him, feeling my limbs shake.
“Once we start, there is no going back,”
“I know.”
“Once you burn down the building, August will send all of his troops to track you down.”
“I know!”
“It’s dangerous,”
“Since when does it matter? I’ve been close to death so many times already. I don’t fear it. I have rarely felt afraid, to be honest.” It is a lie. But he doesn’t have to know the truth just yet.
“What scares you then?”
“You,” I look up at him, fighting the urge to interlace my fingers with his. I hate that the next words bring sweetness to my broken heart, rather than revulsion, “Losing you, too.”
He lowers his head, his lips parting. I remember their taste so well that it becomes bitter. His face is too serious for his answer to be a joke.
“I am not afraid,” he softly points out. “I know your potential.”
“Really?”
“You are meant for grand things, and killing everyone in your path is only one of them.”
This being said, he turns his back and heads outside the city. I look back at the blockade, created by Solen’s inhabitants and curse under my breath. He is right, sundown is best. Less casualties on the street. I hope I can control the destructive magic enough for it not to engulf the whole city.
Fortunately for us there is a market not far from the city. People selling all kinds of goods. We find a street food stand and I gasp. I’ve never tasted these sausages in bread. I run towards the stall and ask for two, passing the vendor a handful of sepha.
While I wait, Kaytus checks the perimeter. Always on his guard, he stares at people approaching the stall, scaring them. It’s a simple guess, but I still tug on his sleeve gently.
“Stop that, you’re scaring the customers,”
“The revolution could be anywhere,”
“If they attack us in broad daylight in the middle of the marketplace, they’re stupid,” I chuckle.
“Or desperate. But that’s just my theory,” he adds, taking the two sticks from the vendor, thanking him.
“Such unrest in the city, oh, mother Nature…” the vendor is an old man, his hands wrinkly and eyes slim, but full of life.
“What have you heard?” I ask, chewing on the delicious food.
“People are blaming the government for the rising poverty, but I think the Fae are to blame. They raised the prices and now we can’t buy their goods.”
I throw a confused look at Kaytus. “So you don’t think the monarchy is at fault?”
“Are you one of those ever unhappy citizens?” He pulls closer to the counter, piercing me with his hooded eyes. They feel ancient, as if they saw the very beginning of this country, and might see its downfall too. But I notice a small smile on his thin lips and it puts my racing heart to ease, even if for a moment.
Kaytus coughs on his stick and looks at me, amused.
“No, no, I am pro-monarchy, sir,”
“Sir? No one has ever called me that, young lady. Well, let me tell you a little secret.” I stand closer, holding the stick in both hands, blowing air on it. I feel Kaytus standing a bit closer, for whatever reason. He is right behind me and I feel his hand wrap around my waist. “I think the king and his family are doing everything that they can to make our lives better. I do not complain even with this poverty and the cold upcoming winter.”
Kaytus moves even closer and adds, “But they’re responsible for public executions.” His cheek is against mine, and I realize he’s crouching to be the same height as me.
“What public executions? Nobody has executed anyone around here.”
I realize what’s going on and hold my breath. There is no communication between the cities. Nobody knows where the executions took place, not even I. I had to trust the revolution on that, and Rigel’s bloodthirst indirectly proved their honesty.
“Well, we must have mixed something up. Sorry to have taken so much of your time,” I gleam and bow swiftly. Kaytus moves, giving me space. The old man looks at me in confusion, but does a little bow with his head too.
We leave the stall and wander to the other side of the market, where benches were placed under the oaks, to hide from rain or the scorching summer sun.
“I forgot that some are still loyal to us,” I say, looking at my sausage in bread. I munch on another bite, and Kaytus does the same.
“He doesn’t know half of what’s happening in the kingdom. That’s no loyalty,”
“Nobody asked for your opinion,” I sneered and continued eating.
“I could leave you alone right now and never come back, you know,” he muses, seemingly full of energy. I start to doze off in his warm coat. I realize he has never demanded it back. I breathe in his scent and a smile tugs my lips.
“Would you?” I turn to him. His eyes are glistening, even in the trees’ shade.
“No.”
“Then shut up and eat.” I snicker, throwing the empty stick to the nearest bin.
My eyes scan the nearby stalls and lock on a beautiful winter coat, with furs around the neck. I stand up and stroll there. I touch the fabric and it’s soft to the touch, just like sheep’s wool. It’s long, perfect for the upcoming weather. It even has a hood. I look at the price tag and wince. My money has all been spent. And I cannot really return to the palace’s treasury to take some more. I sigh and return to the bench, mentally punching air.
“No luck?” Kaytus asks, his hands running through his hair. I note he smells of musk and sandalwood. His odor fills my nostrils and I open my mouth. I breathe in. “Norella?”
“Ah? What?”
“Are you here?”
“Yes, yes, what?” I cannot stop the smell from entering my nose. I feel him closer than he is. All I want is my fingers to trace his jawline, down to his neck. I want to trace my tongue against his lips and taste him again, again, all over again until I am full. The heat overwhelms me and I sense a subtle pounding between my legs. “Sorry, I wasn’t listening.”
“I didn’t say anything,” a smirk creeps up to his lips. I know my whole face is red with shame. I turn away, trying to calm down.
He slides closer. I feel him breathing down my neck and I cannot do anything. I can’t move away, as if he has put shackles around me once more. Memories come to life and I can vividly see him naked, taking all of me in. His eyes were hungry, and his appetite would only be satiated by me. I breathe through my mouth, it soon becomes dry.
“What’s wrong?” His question is innocent, but his fingers find mine and gently play with my palm. I gasp, but refuse to move it away. “Is it fear I sense?” He whispers into my ear.
“I am not afraid of you anymore,” I stammer, turning my head to the side. He tilts his head, his eyes locking with mine. It is too unbearable, so I stand up, but he follows.
I stand tall, but feel so small. Under his gaze I am but a puppet. Who made me so weak? After everything we’ve done, why am I so powerless against his charm?
“You told me yes… You said you were afraid of something else. I need to hear it again,” he is playing me so badly. I know what he wants to hear, but I will not submit. I will not repeat those words again, because it is all too recent. Because I still remember West’s kisses and words, even if they’re fading with each passing second.
“You will get nothing from me,” I say, nodding to press my point. He smiles and glides his lips against mine. I let out a breath I’ve been holding. I shudder at the proximity.
“What should I do to hear you say it one more time?” I want to shove him away. I want to insult him. I want to have a good cry. But none of the three comes out. I curse under my breath, and lean into the kiss, putting my hands around his neck. I pull him closer by the nape, letting my tongue slide against his.
I hear whistles and pull away, hiding my face in my hands. I look through my fingers and see several people clap joyfully. Someone says loudly, “Finally, some love in such hard times.”
I look at Kaytus and he is as stunned as I. He can be proficient in hiding emotions, but he cannot hide this from me. I hope to see embarrassment, for him to avoid touching me so in public space - but instead I see pride, a hint of possessiveness.
“I will tell it one more time once we’re done saving the kingdom,” I say, my voice raspy. “And even more.”
He rolls his eyes, but I am unsure if it’s directed to me or the random person.
“Don’t let it get into your head. I will never forgive you.” I say and the weight of my words settle on my shoulders. It is true. I can never forgive him, just like I will never forget what he has done. But I could still care, in my own way, just like I do now.
“Forgiveness could be a philosophical debate worthy of the researchers in Argenis.” He states, walking towards the clothing stall I’ve visited earlier. He pulls out his purse and points to the coat I liked. The vendor takes the money and puts the coat in a carton bag. “I will never forgive you for killing Drys, either. And yet here I am.”
I take the bag, confused. I watch as the spy walks away, not turning around once.
----------------------------------------
The sun had set and the chilly air started to pick on my chapped lips. I took out the coat Kaytus bought and put it on, feeling all cozy. It’s a moment of peace I will cherish for the days to come.
Around us the buildings start to light up, even through the closed windows I can see rays of light. People are coming home from work, cooking dinner and having parties. I hear distant music and claps. The riots are over and people return to their everyday little joys. I wish I could join them and not spread chaos around the cities.
The wind caresses my cheeks, and I untangle my braid, letting my hair flow with the wind. It’s too long now, the black strands blinding me from time to time. My scalp hurt from the hairstyle - I had to let it go for some time. And now I pay the price, as Kaytus stands by my side, snickering at my struggle.
We walk to the revolution HQ, and I take in the city for the last time. I might never return here. If my plan backfires, and blowing up the revolution doesn’t stop August, I could be seen as a terrorist and Malachite’s citizens will never trust me. Unless I am not identified.
It hurts to walk on the same ground as my ancestors, all monarchs too, and see what they saw, but in such a different light. The pavement is uneven, made by normal people, like me and the person buying bread at the bakery. He bows, taking off his hat and takes his leave. The baker, a young chubby woman, smiles, watching him leave. Her cheeks are red and full lips parted. Her eyes scream of longing. And I remember the person who shouted ‘finally, some love in such hard times’ and I completely understand him.
Kaytus’s feet move rhythmically, as he carries himself with confidence. I cannot ignore the fact that he’s going to see the end of all he held dear for such a long time. My hand finds his and I squeeze it, silently promising him salvation in the future. He doesn’t look at me, a certain goal in mind. I squeeze it again, this time, not pushing him away.
From the outside we look like a normal pair, walking down the street, heading to a shared home. Maybe the baker saw us and thought the same I thought of her. Maybe she saw yearning in my eyes as I watched the city lights, the little shops and the passing horses. I kneeled in front of a big dog, asking its owner if I could pet it. The boy, a little younger than me, nodded absentmindedly, but smiled still. I caressed the fur, complimenting the dog. Kaytus didn’t let go of my hand when I did so.
We pass a theater, where foreign plays are often shown. Malachite isn’t very good with art, but we’re learning. Cinema is still distant, a very rare and expensive technology, owned mostly by the magic wielders. Music recording is rare too. But theater… We recently started upgrading this art. Mother had talked to some ministers and agents, trying to make it more accessible to the people. I demanded to see a play at least once in my life, maybe even be taken to watch an opera. But it never happened. Now it feels like a childish caprice. Indeed, when the whole world might fall apart due to an old treaty, why care about art at all? But these people do not know about the impending sickness. They are ignorant like I was, and honestly, I do not want to burst their bubble. I used to be so happy back then.
I glance at Kaytus as we stop. Yes, I was happy, but I was a puppet. Now I have become a warrior, a woman who fights for what she knows is right. So, I lost happiness in the process, but who is to say it is lost forever?
The spy points to a building like any other, with a wooden sign hanging above the entrance. The inscription is faded and cursive, but I manage to read it. Solar cookies. What a peculiar name for the hiding spot of the best spies of the kingdom.
“It is here,” he says, his voice hoarse. I peek at him.
“Really?”
“Yes. They are under us, in the basement mostly.”
His tone is grave. I feel he is hurting. I know the pain, but we both know it must be done.
I feel sorrowful and my magic feels bleak. I try to summon it, but it echoes through the wards of my mind. I feel panic rise.