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14th Letter: clouds

To my child,

flowing clouds are not my way, I think.

I have been much calmer these last few days. Clearing my head of all thoughts isn't as hard as I thought. I just was just too emotional to try at all.

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The cultivation method wants cultivators to achieve inner peace. I guess I am pretty far from that.

So I have been meditating while looking at the clouds, but clouds are just boring. I can kind of see why they would be flowing, but watching clouds for a long time has to be the most mind numbing thing in the world. It certainly doesn't make me feel like the book said it should.

In love,

your mother