The sun glowed on his body as he walked southward from the mountain pass. On his left was Plainsong, the land of the Utaru. On his right, growing in height, were the mountains that divided No Man’s Land from Tenakth territory. He didn’t know what he was looking for and he was beginning to wonder if he’d gone too far when he spied a solitary figure sitting on a rock at the base of a path that led into the mountains. He looked up when he heard Kotallo’s step. Kotallo recognised him as the other outlander who had been at the embassy with Aloy.
He suspected that the young man, who didn’t look much older than Aloy yet was dressed in the same manner, recognised him as well.
Kotallo walked up to him and stopped on the path.
“Ah…hi.” The young man greeted, glancing inevitably at the place where Kotallo’s left arm was supposed to be. “So…you’re the one Aloy sent?”
“I am.” Kotallo replied.
The young man looked a little uneasy. “You’re…Tenakth?”
“Yes, once of the Sky Clan then as a Marshal.”
He studied him. “You were at the embassy.”
“As were you.”
He floundered. “I…I’ve never seen anyone go up against a charging machine like you did…” He seemed to be in need of something to say. “It was the bravest thing I’ve ever seen.”
Kotallo’s left arm itched even though it was no longer there and all he could think of was his failure to stop the machine or save his fellow Marshal. “A warrior does not require praise for acting like one.” He said brusquely, wanting to move the conversation on. He did not need or want praise.
His words did little to lessen the young man’s concern. “Right. Well, I’m Varl.”
“You are of the same tribe as the Commander?”
“Commander?” Varl frowned. “Uh…you mean Aloy?” Kotallo nodded. “Yes, we’re both of the Nora tribe.”
“I am Kotallo, reporting for duty.” He looked around. “Strange place for a base…”
They seemed to be in the middle of nowhere on the edge of Utaru territory.
“Oh, well, I’ll take you up to the base shortly but first…I need to give you something.” Varl put his hand into a small pouch and drew one of the small triangular things that Aloy and Varl wore on their temples. “Here.”
Kotallo held out his hand. Varl dropped it into his palm. It was so light he barely knew it was there.
“I am to wear this?”
“It’s a device used by the old ones to enhance their day to day lives. Just hold it up to your temple. The FOCUS, which is what we call it, will do the rest.” Varl held his hand out and stopped him. “It’ll seem a little strange at first. Don’t panic.”
Kotallo wanted to laugh at him. How could such a small device make him panic?
He held the FOCUS up, easing it closer and closer to the side of his head when it almost leapt out of his fingers and seemed to attach to his skin. Instantly there was the strangest sound, like that a machine might make but less intrusive and suddenly a blue net appeared around him. Kotallo grabbed his weapon and lunged out at it, Varl calling for him to stop.
“It’s okay. It’s okay,” he insisted, “Kotallo, it’s just the way the world looks when you wear one of these.” Kotallo looked at him, slightly angry but mostly embarrassed. “Put your fingers near it and it’ll deactivate.”
Kotallo did as he was told and the blue net disappeared. He shook his head and blinked. “That was…unexpected.”
“Yeah, I jumped out of my skin too the first time I put one on.” Varl said and before Kotallo could protest his fright he went on. “Wearing a FOCUS in the base straight up can be overwhelming. I thought a brief training session out here would be easier.”
“This…is training?”
“Yep.” Varl nodded. “Now, activate the FOCUS and look at me.”
Kotallo did so with no little trepidation. As he turned his gaze to Varl, strange glyphs appeared over him.
“I see glyphs…”
“That’s my name. Varl.” He pointed up in the direction of the glyphs. “When I look at you, I see glyphs that represent your name, Kotallo.”
Kotallo stared at Varl. “My name…in glyphs?”
“Yeah.” Varl took his bow off his back and held it out. Light ran around it and another set of glyphs appeared above it. “Now it’s telling you that this is a bow.”
“This device can identify objects?”
“Oh it can do so much. Come on.”
Varl told him to leave his pack hidden behind the rock and led him to where a herd of Chargers were gathered, snuffling at the grass where the Blight was not present. Kotallo nearly tripped over his feet several times, he was so distracted by the lights of the world, the FOCUS highlighting countless things.
“Duck down,” Varl whispered, “now, use the FOCUS and look at the Chargers.”
Kotallo did so. To his astonishment, the machines lit up and several places on them were illuminated even more brightly than the rest.
“What is this…”
“You know Chargers have blaze cannisters on their backs. Try focusing on one of those.”
Kotallo did so and more glyphs appeared as well as one that he thought he could identify.
“Flame…” He breathed.
“Blaze is flammable. The FOCUS identifies that with a flame symbol.”
Kotallo turned to Varl. “Are you telling me that this,” he gestured to the FOCUS, “can show me the weaknesses in a machine? Even ones unknown?”
“Yep,” Varl chuckled, “and that’s just a tiny part of what it can do. Come on.”
They spent what remained of the good light of the day seeking out machine herds so that Kotallo could see the FOCUS in action. Varl put his hand on his shoulder and pointed up as a Stormbird coasted overhead, elements illuminated on it like nothing Kotallo had ever seen before. Even animals and birds were brightly lit up despite being in dense foliage or on the other side of rocks. Varl was able to pierce several rabbits with accurate aim, tying their feet together.
“They’ll make a hearty stew…unless Erend’s cooking…then we’ll be eating charcoal.”
They went back to where Kotallo had stashed his belongings and he slung his swag on his back, he and Varl walking together up the path.
“This device,” Kotallo gestured to it, “this is how she sees?”
“Aloy? Yeah, ever since she was a little girl.”
Kotallo shook his head. “With all Nora wearing such devices…you must be a formidable tribe.”
“Ah,” Varl paused, “yeah…no. As a tribe, the Nora see anything belonging to the old world as tainted and are forbidden to delve. Aloy fell into the ruins of an old world underground bunker when she was a child and found one. It taught her…so much.”
Kotallo thought about this. “If your tribe did not condone trespass onto the old world ruins, how did she continue to wear the FOCUS?” The word was strange to speak when naming an object.
“Well…Aloy wasn’t exactly part of the tribe.” Varl stopped and turned towards Kotallo. “It’s…her story is…complicated…and hers to tell, really. But Aloy grew up an outcast of the Nora and was raised by another outcast.”
“What could a child have done to warrant being cast out?”
“Actually…she was a baby.” Varl sighed. “Look, it makes the Nora sound like heartless harpies and while some of that might be true…the situation around Aloy’s birth was complicated and it divided the Matriarchs who lead the Nora tribe. Mothers are extremely important to the Nora and Aloy didn’t have one.”
“How…”
“I don’t fully comprehend it myself.” Varl admitted. “As a baby…the Matriarchs didn’t know what to do. One saw her as a blessing, the others believed she was a curse.” Kotallo stared at Varl, his brows hard. “She was trained well and the FOCUS helped her understand the world around her in so many ways…and when she came of age, she ran in the Proving which is a kind of trial to become a Nora brave.”
“She wanted to become part of the tribe?” Somehow that didn’t ring true although Kotallo reasoned he did not know much about her at all…except that her madness matched her capability.
“No. She wanted to be first amongst the braves so she would receive a boon and demand to know the circumstances around her birth which had been kept a secret from her. But the Proving was attacked by Shadow Carja. They slaughtered so many…” Varl’s tone grew heavy with grief. Kotallo studied him. Had he lost someone in that battle? His melancholy seemed personal. “Aloy survived and was sent as a Seeker, allowed to leave the sacred lands of my tribe, into the world.” Varl cleared his throat. “We’d better get moving. This last part of the path is steep and our light is dying fast.”
Kotallo followed him up the incline to where the rock path led straight into the side of a mountain. There was a flat wall of metal with a seam down the middle. Kotallo had seen it before in old world ruins and suspected they were doors. Unless they were damaged and could be pried apart, there was no getting through them. However, for the first time ever, Kotallo saw a glowing ring around where they met. Varl put his fingers into the ring of blue light and the metal doors slid apart.
Kotallo was attempting to salvage his pride by not being surprised or frightened and so he did not give anything away that spoke of his astonishment as he and Varl quite literally walked inside a mountain.
The walls around them were flat and smooth, made of metal as were the floor and ceiling. Kotallo looked around at the unnatural surroundings that quickly emptied out into a large space, as big and as round as a training pit. There were perfectly round metal posts holding up the ceiling and a table or counter against one wall where a Utaru and what looked like an Oseram were talking.
“Welcome to the base.” Varl said, striding towards the others. “I’d like you to meet the others in Aloy’s…uh…”
“We’re her friends.” The Utaru woman said firmly.
“Uh…Tenakth…” The Oseram said hesitatingly.
“I am.” Kotallo said coldly.
“Kotallo, this is Zo.” Varl introduced them. “She’s the one who told us about this place, who showed us the way and since then…”
“Upon realising the gravity of what Aloy has to accomplish…I was compelled to stay and help her.” Zo replied with absolute conviction. She was as lithe as all Utaru he had ever seen, her skin as warm as the earth of the Daunt and her face decorated with white markings that resembled falling petals. “Welcome, Kotallo.”
“And this is Erend, an Oseram from the east.”
“Ah…hi…”
He was barrel chested and tall, his face adorned with thick facial hair that was heavier on his cheeks and curved around his top lip.
“Erend knew Aloy from the east. When the base was discovered and we realised Aloy needed allies, Erend joined us here. Zo and Erend, this is Kotallo.”
“I am here following my pledge of service to the Commander.”
“The what now?” Erend looked at Zo.
“You mean Aloy?”
“Yes.” Kotallo couldn’t understand their confusion. Had they no concept of chain of authority?
“Ah, yes well…Aloy might be our ‘commander’,” Varl admitted, “but I wouldn’t call her that.”
“She doesn’t like titles,” Erend chuckled, “and she’s got a few. Strider Rider. Machine Slayer.”
“The Anointed.” Varl looked at Kotallo. “She really hates that one cause it’s what the Nora called her after they realised she really was a blessing and not the curse they outcast her for.”
“Don’t forget the Saviour of Meridian!” Erend gestured grandly and shook his head.
Kotallo recalled when he and Aloy had stood before Tekotteh and he had extolled her defeat of Grudda at the embassy. She had been uncomfortable with the attention then too.
“How do I address her?” Kotallo asked sincerely.
The other three looked at each other.
“Uh…Aloy?” Erend offered.
“We’re not as formal as Tenakth military.” Zo explained.
“That much is obvious.” Kotallo muttered.
“Have you explained Gaia to Kotallo?”
“Not yet. Gaia is one of those, has to be seen to be believed.” Varl looked at him. “Drop your gear there and I’ll take you to meet her.”
Kotallo did as he was told. He could hear Erend whispering urgently with Zo and as Oseram weren’t great with subtly, he heard every word.
“Are you sure he’s the one Aloy sent?”
“Call her if you want and make sure…but seeing as she was at Memorial Grove obtaining Aether when she told us about a new ally, then I’d say he’s the one.”
“Yeah…but a Tenakth?”
“She wouldn’t have told him of this place if she didn’t trust him.”
Kotallo turned his attention forward as Varl began to speak.
“So, you’re about to meet Gaia.”
“Another in the service of,” it was hard to say as it seemed a little disrespectful, “Aloy?”
“Ah…kind of in tandem.” Varl paused before a door. “The visions in the Grove…they are images of light, yeah?”
Kotallo wondered how Varl could know about them. “Yes.”
“But you don’t talk to them.”
“Well…no. But there was one, the Anne Faraday vision, where she spoke to all who would listen about the importance of Marshals.” Kotallo explained.
“But she couldn’t interact with you.”
“No.”
You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.
Varl nodded. “Gaia…isn’t like that. She appears as a vision but she can talk to you and she listens as well. Aloy is currently on a mission to retrieve parts of Gaia that will help her become stronger. One of those was in the Grove.”
“In the chamber beneath the throne?”
“Yeah.” Varl breathed out. “You ready?”
Kotallo squared his shoulders. “I am.”
The doors opened and Kotallo immediately strode forward, determined not to be overcome in the presence of these outlanders. He would remain strong as a Tenakth ought to be and was sure that whatever this ‘Gaia’ was, that he would face it unafraid and unflinching.
It took all of his will power not to drop to his knees in awe.
A woman made of sparkles of light, drifted above the centre ring of a domed room, her skin a rich hue like Varl’s or Zo’s, her hair and draped clothing made of transparent ribbons of gold and all of her had an aura of luminous presence that was more lifelike than any vision Kotallo had seen.
If anything, she looked like she was made of the last shafts of sunlight over the tops of the mountains.
“Welcome back, Varl,” the vision called Gaia spoke and she even looked at Varl, “and welcome to you too, Kotallo of the Tenakth.”
He gazed at her in wonder. “You know me?”
Gaia waved her hand and suddenly the walls of the room she was in shifted and flickered, images appearing on them. Kotallo stared as he saw himself standing at the edge of Stone Crest, then at the Bulwark and also at the Grove.
“How…is that possible?” He breathed.
“Your interactions with Aloy were recorded on her FOCUS which were transmitted to me.” Gaia said with a warm, even an alive, tone.
“This,” Kotallo gestured to the triangular device, “sees what I see?”
“And saves it.” Varl added.
“So this…” Kotallo stared at the walls. “This is what…Aloy saw?”
“Yes.” Kotallo’s Tenakth resolve was under threat of crumbling. “I know you must have many questions, Kotallo and I will endeavour to answer them. In anticipation of your arrival and collating my interactions with Varl, Zo and Erend, I have created a small presentation which will hopefully answer much of what you need to know.”
“I’ll leave you in Gaia’s hands.” Varl said. “I’ve got to go make sure Erend doesn’t break another FOCUS.”
Kotallo watched and listened in amazement as Gaia painted pictures on the walls, depicting a battle fought in vain against deadly machines that scalped the earth and killed every living thing on it while the old ones worked frantically to build the vision of Gaia who would sow the seed of life so that humans and the earth they existed on, could be saved.
He heard about how Ted Faro killed all those who were left and wiped the collective knowledge known as ‘Apollo’ from Gaia’s mind. Though he didn’t understand fully the depth of his depravity, Kotallo was aware of the grief when a Tenakth warrior died, taking their markings, the story of their deeds, with them. He likened the loss of Apollo to that, knowledge and memories that would never be regained.
He saw the images of a lifeless planet where the Faro plague of machines scuttled until succumbing to inactivity, unable to find anything to consume. He saw Gaia’s will, outworked through something called Minerva which was able to deactivate the machines and began to reconstruct the earth. Several times she tried and several times it failed, another part of her known as Hades needing to halt the rebuild effort and start again.
Finally it worked and when the earth was ready, babies were born inside Cradle facilities, nurtured in metal berths and watched over as they grew up with artificial parents. Eventually the food ran out and the children had to leave their cradles. Some perished and others bonded together into tribes, creating culture out of wilderness.
The world was reset and starting to find its feet when a strange signal reached Gaia, a voice that dislodged parts of her, scattering them into the world and turning the one called Hades into a violent and aggressive opponent who pursued his original purpose and tried to wipe the earth clean. Gaia had tried to stop this by destroying herself yet she had only been ablet to delay Hades.
And there, in the midst, was Aloy, a young woman stopping the demon mind of Hades from reactivating the Faro plague atop a spire near the Carja capital in the Sundom, Meridian.
“While Hades has been purged and any threat it posed, eliminated, there is another part of me called Hephaestus that designed and builds machines.” Gaia explained. “Its original purpose was to design and build machines that could cultivate and purify the earth. But with my predecessor’s destruction, it operated on its own without guidance and as humans attacked machines, it saw the hunters as a threat. In response, it designed and built even more aggressive machines, some made purely to be hunter killers.”
“You speak of the Derangement?” Kotallo asked. “The maddening of the machines?”
“Yes.”
He shook his head. “The Mad Sun-King thought he could stop it with blood sacrifice. He thought raiding and slaughtering hundreds…thousands, in his wretched Sun-Ring would appease the machines and end the derangement.”
Gaia’s face conveyed deep sadness. “He was grievously mistaken.”
Kotallo closed his eyes.
“Aloy is currently retrieving my missing components. I was reawakened with Minerva who existed in this place,” she held out her hands to the walls around her, “and soon I will absorb Aether and I will be able to lessen the storms.”
“You will be able to do that?”
“A temporary fix, but yes.” Gaia nodded. “Aloy is also going to retrieve Poseidon and Demeter, giving me a measure of control over the sewing of seeds that I might stop, even reverse the Blight to some extent and also cleanse the waters.”
Kotallo immediately thought of the Blood Choke. “The rivers around Thornmarsh in the Raintrace, are infested…”
“Red algae is poisoning the waters.”
“And you can fix that?”
“Again, it is all temporary but I should be able to cause the waters to run clear once more.” Gaia explained. “Ultimately, all of this is in vain unless and until I am able to absorb Hephaestus.”
“He, it, makes the machines.”
“Yes.”
Kotallo blinked. “Which you will then be able to do?”
“Yes, turning back the declining biosphere,” she held up her hand to a glowing orb that apparently represented the earth they were on, “and reclaiming it as a safe, habitable place for humans, flora and fauna once more.”
Kotallo felt as though his mind was leaking. He closed his eyes.
“There is another threat you should be aware of, Kotallo.” Gaia told him of the Far Zenith colony. Just when Kotallo thought his mind couldn’t be stretched any further, he learned of humans who had left earth, pretended to have died in an explosion so that they couldn’t be followed and lived on a planet so far away, it wasn’t even a speck on the blackness of the night’s sky. And now, the descendants of those humans were back, killing any of the humans on earth with their intimidating weaponry, attempting to steal Gaia’s components for themselves.
“Finally,” he muttered, “an enemy I can sink my blade into…”
“Until I can be made whole enough to absorb Hephaestus,” Gaia warned, “I will not be able to take control of machine design and building which we will undoubtedly need to defeat the Zeniths.”
“At least they are an enemy I can see.” Kotallo admitted.
“I will share Aloy’s recorded experience with them to your FOCUS,” Gaia said and Kotallo felt his FOCUS light up for a moment, “you can observe it in your own time and study your opponent.”
“Thank you.” He responded.
Gaia gazed at him and he was astonished at how easy it had been to communicate with a vision. She seemed to have a natural way about her.
“Kotallo, may I speak candidly?”
“Yes.”
“You seem to be handling the knowledge of the trauma of the past and the enormity of the obstacles that we now face with little to no emotion.”
“I am Tenakth.” Kotallo responded. “Our own tribal history is replete with trauma.”
“While I know this to be true, I am more concerned that, unexpectedly, the emotion could catch up with you. If and when this happens, should you need to talk, I am always here.”
Kotallo bowed. “Thank you.”
He turned and left the room. Varl, Zo and Erend looked up at his approach.
“So…how’d you go with Gaia’s presentation?” Varl asked cautiously.
“It…kind of did a number on me when I first watched it.” Erend admitted.
“Tenakth must be made of sterner stuff than the Oseram.” Kotallo remarked and Erend’s mouth fell open as he looked around.
“I moved your swag into a room we have dedicated for sleeping quarters.” Zo gestured. “I’ll show you.”
He followed her to the room where there were four areas, separated by walls that didn’t go to the ceiling or offer quite as much privacy as Kotallo preferred. In the early days, he didn’t mind being in the same lodge as others and even up until the embassy, he preferred it. However, without his arm, he felt self conscious especially as he tried to dress. He didn’t want their pity and he certainly didn’t want offers of help.
“This is you, here,” Zo gestured to where his swag was tucked, “and Erend is there.”
“You do not stay here?”
“Varl and I…have our own space.” Ah, of course…he had not mistaken the longing looks in their eyes as they beheld each other. “Aloy also has her own room.”
“As befits a Commander’s station.” Kotallo nodded.
“Well, I’m going back out there because Erend insists on cooking the rabbits for supper that Varl brought in…and I don’t eat meat. When you’re ready, feel free to join us.”
As a Marshal, Kotallo was aware that his presence sometimes stilted conversation around campfires amongst other Tenakth. It seemed it was no different here. Not that Kotallo was in mind for gushing friendship. But he was hungry and the food smelled good, possibly because Varl had wrestled the cooking of the meat from Erend who seemed to think splashes of ale fixed everything.
“Keep that foul brew away from me.” Zo warned him.
“You Utaru don’t know good ale when you smell it.”
“Apparently neither do Oseram.” While Erend spluttered for a reply, Zo held a flat round shape to Kotallo. “Apparently you put food on it and eat. It’s called a plate.” Kotallo wondered just how primitive the other tribes thought the Tenakth really were. He knew what a plate was. Admittedly they rarely bothered unless at a feasting table and even then, the plates just held the food that one grabbed with a hand and ate. “I made some bread from some of my grain rations.” She tore a piece off and handed it to him.
The smell filled his nostrils, turning back time to years earlier and he recalled the scent of the Utaru’s settlement at Stone’s Echo, the taste of bread…the young Utaru herbalist who had warned the Tenakth squad about the mines in the gorge…
He looked at her and his eyes widened as did hers. Immediately they recognised each other. Though they didn’t say anything, there was an acknowledgement that they had met before.
How strange that he should meet her again here…
Life was full of oddities.
The food was good and filled his belly. Kotallo listened to the other three talk about their training, what they were learning and how they were coping. Erend seemed to struggle with the finesse of it all. Given that his people tended to work with hammers and not delicate precision, Kotallo was not surprised. Zo was remarkably proficient, even surpassing Varl but he suspected that had less to do with competence and more to do with her confidence. She and Erend were very different to each other and it was easy to see that Varl was the middle ground, both in ability, in friendship and sometimes in being a buffer between them.
“How’s your head?”
“My head?” Kotallo asked.
“I struggled with headaches the first couple of days wearing a FOCUS.” Varl admitted.
“I see glyphs in my dreams.” Erend snorted.
“I tired easily in the beginning but am starting to stretch my capacity.” Zo added.
“It is there and it does what it is supposed to do.” Kotallo responded.
“Wow…really, you put it on and just…life is normal?” Erend slurped loudly from his stein.
Kotallo leaned towards him. “I am thirsty.” He enjoyed the shock on Erend’s face a little too much. He paled while the other two looked at Kotallo warily. Kotallo dragged the awkward silence for a little longer before adding, “are you going to share that ale?”
“Oh…you mean…yeah, sure…” Erend jumped up and poured him a stein.
“Hey Erend…”
“No, Varl, you’re banned.” Erend barked.
“What, not even one drink?”
“Not unless you want more ‘conversation’ later.” Zo jabbed him.
“Uh…good point.”
“Besides, you get weepy.”
“I do not.”
“You do so. The party at Meridian after Hades was defeated…you were dancing like a madman then weeping like an old woman.”
“At least I don’t get so maudlin that I start hugging people.”
“It takes a lot for me to get to that point. What do you think of the ale?”
Kotallo shrugged. “It isn’t blood but it’ll do.”
Varl and Erend became stricken and still.
Zo laughed softly. “You’re going to give them nightmares, Kotallo and as for you two,” she looked at them, “you shouldn’t believe everything you hear. The Tenakth aren’t blood gulping child stealers.”
“Where did you hear that?” Kotallo exclaimed in his soft way.
“That you are or aren’t those things?” Erend snorted. “There was a…woman, a Tenakth, in a Carja prison called Sun Rock. She was the only Tenakth I’d ever seen, her face painted red and blue…”
“I think Fashav mentioned her once.” Kotallo nodded. “Ullia.”
“That’s her!” Erend exclaimed. “She was all, I will drink your blood and take your children as my own! What other conclusion could we draw?”
Kotallo put his stein down. “The three tribes of Tenakth waged wars against each other for many years. The strongest possessed Memorial Grove until another clan rose up and claimed it in blood. If Tenakth soldiers killed warriors of another tribe, they would respect the fallen by tasting their blood and if they had any children, they would be adopted by the stronger tribe as their own, raised as equals.”
“Seems much more respectful and decent when you tell it.” Erend admitted.
“Blood drinking stopped many years ago though some Tenakth warriors still persisted in it. And had I not been hidden as a child when my parents were killed, I might have been raised as a Desert Clan soldier and not Sky Clan.”
“You might not have met Aloy if that was the case and come here.” Zo remarked.
“This is true.” Goodness knows how his life would have unfolded had that happened.
When he repaired to his sleeping area, Kotallo undid his swag and severed the stitches that held it together. With some basic knots and rope, he was able to fashion a curtain that gave him a little more privacy. It was difficult with one arm but he persisted.
The bed was a metal slab but his swag had contained his sleeping mat. The room was cold but he had grown up in the Sheerside Mountains. He knew how to keep warm.
He lay on the mat and stared at the ceiling. He tapped his FOCUS and lights burst into existence. Not much of what he saw made sense. From what he’d seen Varl, Zo and Erend do, he knew he could almost touch the lights and he tried swiping at them then huffed and turned it off and looked over at Silent Kill.
He hoped that the morning would bring him something he could kill.
“K…O…T…A…L…L…O.” He sighed and stared at the ground. He’d just etched what he was told was his name in the snow. It didn’t mean any more to him seeing it in written in physical form than it did in light before his eyes. He put his fingers to his head and tried to push back the headache that was looming. He hadn’t slept well, nightmares of machines devouring the earth while glyphs danced brightly across the sky had caused him to toss and turn…and every time he rolled onto his left, the stump of his arm would connect with something. The pain was never ending. Even though it was no longer throbbing, the smallest knock caused him incredible agony.
Fighting the rebel Tenakth, the Tremortusk…it had helped alleviate it. He was a warrior again and he honestly thought that a soldier was what Aloy needed.
He braced himself and touched the FOCUS, his eyes wincing at the light.
“To review data I must first find the file.” He said, swiping his fingers against the air, sending light scattering. “What the hell does any of that mean?”
Varl had shown him and Kotallo had thought he understood. But it all fell out of his head a moment later. It was like his brain was conspiring against him and refused to retain any of it.
“Come on.” He muttered. “I can do this.”
Try as he might, he could not find the file that Gaia had supposedly put on his FOCUS about the Zenith fight with Aloy. Kotallo wanted to study a potential opponent for that is where his strength lay yet he couldn’t understand anything the FOCUS showed him.
He cursed how elated he had been after the Kulrut, after Regalla had been resisted. He had known that his new purpose in life was to stand by Aloy and serve her mission…
…but only days later, he was failing.
It might have been possible had he been up against a physical enemy, someone or something he could cut down or simply stand in front of Aloy to save her so that she could do that which she was driven to complete.
But here he was, playing in the damn snow…unable to comprehend anything!
He wasn’t a learned man.
He was a soldier.
He followed orders.
He could kill and he could stand his ground.
But this…hateful device…might be the thing that defeated him.
“Work, damn it.” He ordered the device, his head pounding relentlessly. “Just…”
“Kotallo…”
He let out an unguarded cry of fright, yanking the FOCUS off his head, throwing it aside. It had been Gaia’s voice speaking to him, her words almost inside of his head yet the suddenness as she called his name was too much. He looked at the little device in the snow, trembling.
He was failing.
He scrunched his right hand into a fist and hit a rock.
“I…I need…” He heard a metallic noise above and looked up. A Sunwing was drifting overhead, landing on the mountain’s ascent. “Yes…you’ll do.”
He clambered up the mountain, his blood like acid in his veins until he reached their perch. There were three of them. Normally he would not be so foolish as to take on three machines. But Kotallo was frustrated and he needed to win at something.
One Sunwing went down before it had any idea he was there. The second turned and gave a cry just before Kotallo dragged Silent Kill across its neck, severing the connections, causing it to collapse to the ground. The third machine, however, had taken off and it swooped overhead, red and angry.
Kotallo wasn’t scared.
He knew exactly how it felt.
It plunged at him and he ducked and swiped, catching its clawed feet. It pulled up into the air, twisted and dove again. This time, Kotallo slice through its wing and it fluttered to the ground, getting up unsteadily as he launched himself at it, slicing and pounding until it moved no more.
He stood back, breathing heavily, Silent Kill slick with machine blood.
Kotallo inhaled the frosty air, sucking it into his lungs, feeling the burn of frustration wick away as his blood chilled in his veins. When the anger had subsided he stripped the carcases of anything worth salvaging and dragged it back down to the base entrance.
To his dismay his FOCUS was missing. He knew where it had landed but it was not there. Perhaps it had sunk into the snow and vanished forever?
Kotallo burned in shame. He had been given a second FOCUS to back his data, whatever that meant but he was angry with himself for having lost the first one. A brief look didn’t reveal its location and he stomped down the slope and discovered Zo waiting for him.
They looked at each other for a moment.
“Gaia was worried about you.” Zo explained. “She asked me to check on you.”
“I’m fine.” Kotallo said through gritted teeth.
Zo eyed him and then the haul of machine parts. “Three Sunwings…not bad. If you ever want a real challenge, there are Bristlebacks in the gorge below,” he tried not to grind his teeth, “but I’d urge you to wear this,” she held out her hand where the FOCUS rested, “it’s there to help you.”
Kotallo took it and glared at it.
“I know it’s hard…”
“It’s impossible.” He snarled, more at it than her. “How can I be an effective soldier for her mission if I can’t even work this tiny…thing?”
“Kotallo…you are already an effective soldier…a great warrior.” Zo insisted. “You were at Barren Light. You opened the gates…you stopped the Carja from taking any more of my people.”
“I am not the man I once was.” Kotallo growled, clutching at the stump.
“Erend and I sometimes train against each other…because I think he could use a lesson or two in diplomatic niceties,” Zo said smugly then paused, “even with the loss of your arm…I would not want to fight you, Kotallo. Your ability of a warrior is not in question and if you put your ego aside…you might learn something.” She grasped some of the haul from the Sunwings. “I was putting some supplies into a chest for Aloy. Some of what you have salvaged might be of use to her.”
“Then it is yours to give to her.” Kotallo offered and helped her drag it inside.
Afterwards Kotallo ascended the stairs to where the Gaia vision waited for him.
“Kotallo,” she greeted, “I am sorry that my greeting before caused you distress.”
“You were not the cause,” he muttered, “you were the snowflake that triggered the avalanche.”
“I understand the analogy.” Gaia nodded. “I am here to help you, Kotallo.”
He turned away. “I thought I was here to help Aloy,” he said softly, “I thought I could stand beside her and cast her enemies to the ground…even like this,” he looked at the scars of the stump, “I might have been able to sacrifice my life to save hers in some way. But this,” he pointed to the FOCUS, “I cannot begin to understand it.” He paused and closed his eyes. “I am not a clever man. I have acted with reckless foolishness and without consideration to the future…what good am I here?”
“Kotallo, Aloy would not have permitted you to know about the base if she did not trust you.” Gaia insisted. “She believes you are capable of coming to terms with this new world.”
“Then she has overestimated my abilities and I was a fool to think I could help.” Kotallo sighed. “I…I won’t give up. My pride wars within me to stay and be stubborn or to leave and disappear before she realises her mistake.”
“Aloy has shown herself to be a good judge of character and as such, perhaps you should have a little more faith in yourself.” Gaia urged. “I am here to help you, Kotallo…and I will not judge or come to the end of my patience if you decide to stay.”
Kotallo took a deep breath in, all the tension and frustration like a giant knot in his chest.
Then he breathed out and expelled all of it.
“I…need help.” He admitted. “Will you teach me how to best serve Aloy?”
“I will.”