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- "Granger, I've loved you since second year. It's torn me apart." -
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I slept well for the first time in months. Finally getting a solid answer to my wonderings. She loved me. The events of that night seemed unreal, impossible. Hermione Granger couldn't love someone as dark and twisted as me. But her words and kisses that night told me differently.
We hadn't told anyone about that night, but the harder thing to create a story for was why she was taking me to Slughorn's Christmas Party tonight. It took a week of meticulous planning and practice different situations to pull off.
"Okay, I'm Weaselbee," I told her, running through our practice scenarios.
She rolled her eyes, "Draco, how many times to I have to tell you? It's Weasley, not Weaselbee.
"Sounds the same to me," I smiled.
She huffed, "Alright, let's get on with it."
"Why are you taking Draco Malfoy to the party?" I said in a tone that insinuated that Weasley was thicker than he was.
I could tell she didn't appreciate that, but she didn't nitpick. "Because I thought that it would make you jealous."
I paused, confusion plastered on my face. How true was that response? It was nothing, mostly my own mind overthinking things, but if I was capable of using her, was she as well?
"Is that why you said yes to me? To make Weasley jealous?"
"No Draco! How could you say that?" she exploded at me, but there was something else that she wasn't saying. "Well, maybe a little."
"How much is a little?"
She couldn't look me in the eye, "About half."
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I shook my head, embarrassed with myself. How could I be so blind? Of course she loved Weasley, he was good for her. Protective, strong, and can put up with her spunky attitude. He would never use her as a prop, like I am.
"But Draco, I wasn't lying when I told you I loved you. I do."
That was some compensation. I still couldn't get over that she only said yes to me to make someone jealous, it made me feel like dust. But then I remembered that half of the reason I even suggested she ask me in the first place was because I need to get into friendly contact with Professor Slughorn. I am such a hypocrite. It only bothers me when someone spits back my own medicine.
I was still shocked. How could she love two people at once. There has to be someone she loves more. "What about the potion. All those things you said, they were about me."
"Yes Draco, because I love you," she said, "Much more than Ron."
Her saying his name infuriated me, how dare she say that boy's name in front of me. She was designed to say mine, but no one else's. But after the initial wave of jealousy crashed, I realized what her answer meant. She loved me more. Me.
I cracked a pained smile, "Okay."
"However I did lie," she continued. "I didn't smell midnight breeze. I only said that because I knew you were listening."
WHAT? My head shot to attention. "Then what did you smell Granger?" I spat at her, nose scrunching in disgust, "Dirt and mold, I imagine. Just like Weasley's house."
"HOW DARE YOU!" she yelled at me, "You always bring your stupid prejudices into everything!"
"It's not prejudice when it is FACT!"
"I could tell you facts about your family too Malfoy!"
"Oh yeah? Then spit it out Granger!"
"You're entire family are Death Eaters! You're aunt, Bellatrix, has killed and tortured people, did you know that?"
I did actually. I just didn't know who.
"Why do you think Neville is so scared of you huh? His parents don't know who he is anymore because your aunt tortured them to insanity!" She covered her mouth. That wasn't her secret to tell, but she had.
The truth came out and there was no coming back. I was just a baby when Auntie Bella was put into Azkaban, and I had just gotten her back. I knew that she was crazy from her stay there, but now I am thinking that she was even crazy before then.
"I shouldn't have told you that. Ah, Neville's going to kill me!"
"No he won't!" I shouted, collapsing into the floor. This was too much at one time. If anyone was going to kill Granger, it sure as hell won't be Longbottom.
I flashed back to second year when the basilisk in the Chamber of Secrets had petrified her. Nothing seemed to matter anymore except for her. Reality was reformed in my mind and I started having doubts about my father's parenting. What if that happened again, but this time she would never wake up? I shook with sobs, "Granger, if anyone is going to kill you, it will be because of me."
"What?"
"I was trying to tell you before. My father believes firmly in the purity of blood. He almost killed Potter for freeing our house-elf, I'm sure you heard about that."
"Dobby," she responded.
"Yeah. What would happen if he found out about you? What do I do? Do I stand with him as he hurts you or possibly kills you, or do I betray my family?"
I think she saw the truth of why I had been avoiding her, bullying her even, for our entire relationship. "Oh."
She wrapped her body around me like I had that night we confessed our love for each other. My shakings slowed, then ceased as I felt her support all around me. "I get it now Draco, I understand."
"Granger, I've loved you since second year. It's torn me apart."
"It was all just a mask," she repeated my words.
"Yeah. It always was."