Eon and Murp were waiting for us when we returned to the Transport Bay. My gym bag was already waiting inside the shower-like glass box, and the adjacent control panel glowed and gave off puffs of steam.

The yellow furball alien grabbed my briefcase, which contained the two contracts, and dragged it into the glass enclosure.

"Mr. Todd arrived on the Planet Azodii late last night," Lord Farkvold said. "He has already met the Azodii delegation. You'll meet him at the Palace, and he can provide you with any other details for the mission."

"The assignment," one the words left my lips, I wondered if I shouldn't have corrected the Lord High Councilman. "Yes, your Lordship."

Farkvold's head twisted around to face the two-headed Transport Agent.

"Is everything in order?"

"Yes, Lord Farkvold!" Eon lowered his eyes in deference, or fear. "We received approval from Azodii Transpo. We are clear to send Marshall of Earth to the planet's surface."

"Hail Slatt!" Murp cried. Lord Farkvold ignored him and Eon continued.

"Energy portals are prohibited within the Palace of Bal, for security reasons," Eon said. "We can manifest a portal a few yards outside, just beyond the Palace gates."

"Once you materialize, members of the Azodii Guard will escort you inside." Murp said. "It will be a short walk - less than a quarter-mile. But, as you may have heard -"

"Yes, I've heard," I said. "Azodii is very cold."

The body of Eon-Murp grabbed a small device off the console - a pair of lenses that looked like binoculars. Murp stretched his neck to the binoculars and peered through, examining me up-and-down in an unsettling way.

"Let's see…" Murp continued to size me up, squinting a lone eye into the device, switching back and forth between the left and right lenses. "Your body has a minimal-to-moderate fat content."

"Um, thank you," I said.

"And I see your cloak is lined with dead avian carcasses." I looked down at my red ski jacket. Murp must have seen the down feathers inside. "Primitive, but it should do the trick."

Murp tossed the binoculars to the side, then the same hand reached over to scratch Eon's forehead. "Your core temperature should stay warm enough to get you through the Palace gates without freezing to death."

"Just walk quickly," Eon added. It wasn't very reassuring.

"Marshall of Earth," Lord Farkvold said. "Our acquisition offer expires tomorrow at midnight. I expect you and Mr. Todd to secure the signatures from Premier Oato before then. The High Council is anxious to bind this agreement before our next session. "

"We'll certainly do our best, Lord Farkvold," I said. "And…If I may say so, it pleases me to see the Slatt Empire use negotiation and diplomacy, rather than brute force. It's a true credit to your leadership – that you can achieve your goal of territorial expansion without resorting to violence."

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Farkvold looked at me curiously, his oblong head tilted to the side. "As I said," Lord Farkvold's voice was even, as if the compliment didn't register. "A wasteland like Azodii isn't worthy of violence. Diplomacy, although detestable, is sometimes the better path."

I opened my mouth to say something, but Farkvold cut me off –

"One must be wary of diplomacy, Earth attorney," Lord Farkvold walked toward the door, the faceless fur creature in tow. "On the battlefield, you know that your enemy is the one trying to gut you. But at the negotiating table, everyone smiles. You never know anyone's true intentions until it's too late." The Councilman smiled, and ran a black tongue over sharpened teeth.

"I will leave you in the capable hands of our Transport Agents," Lord Farkvold nodded to Eon and Murp before turning on heel and disappearing out the door.

Eon, the left cyclops head, waited until the door hissed closed before breathing a sigh of relief. "All right, Earth attorney," his neck spun around to the control board, but his body stayed facing me, a finger pointing toward the glass box. "You can step inside, next to your luggage. We're ready."

Traveling through a wormhole is uncomfortable. Humans weren't built to be broken down into particles, accelerated through space, and then reassembled. The process always leaves me feeling tired and disoriented for hours or days, like a bad case of jetlag.

It had been less than three hours since I materialized from the Blarney Stone bathroom. I wasn't looking forward to my second jump of the day – I was already feeling fatigued and woozy.

As I zipped up my Canada Goose jacket, I saw the Vicchady tie. I had forgotten about it completely. But there it was, wrapped around my neck with a fat Windsor knot, bright and dazzling and orange as ever. I felt a little jolt of dopamine when I pictured myself showing the tie to Henry. I couldn't wait to see his reaction and gloat. Gloat on a different planet. It was something to look forward to.

I tucked the Vicchady under the puffy jacket, and brought up the zipper carefully so as not to damage the designer necktie.

"I know it's going to be cold," I said to Eon-Murp. "But how is the air quality on Azodii? Will I have any problems breathing?"

"Oh, yes! I nearly forgot!" Eon exclaimed. "Earth creatures do not have the biological means to synthesize oxygen, that's right! Murp, I told you to remind me about that."

"I forgot completely," said the other head. "My bad. Well, that's would have been a disaster, wouldn't it!" The two heads burst into laughter.

"I'm glad I asked," I felt my face growing red. "Two separate brains, and neither of you idiots thought of how I'm supposed to breathe down there?"

They stopped laughing and turned their cyclops eyes toward me. "Sorry," said Murp. "Eon, what do you think?"

"We don't have time for an Oxygenator Implant," Eon rummaged through an open drawer. "Surgery will take too long. Here, you'll need to wear one of these."

Eon handed me a curved piece of clear, flexible material with a valve on the end.

"What is it?"

"It's a portable oxygenation filter. A gas mask," Murp said. "You'll need to wear it over your mouth and nose at all times. It will convert the atmospheric gasses on Azodii into breathable air."

I placed the open end against my mouth and wrapped the strings around the top of my ears. There was a low whirr, and the device suctioned to my face like a vacuum cleaner.

"There! It's working," Eon said. "How does it feel?"

"Uncomfortable, but bearable," I said. I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the polished steel of one of the instrument panels. The filter jutted out a few inches in front of my face. I looked like a duck.

"Okay, let's try this again," Eon ushered me into the glass enclosure, next to my luggage. My heart started to pound; portal jumps are nerve-wracking enough, and I was doubly nervous with Eon and Murp in charge. It felt like I was getting into a car with a drunk driver.

But I knew that things would get easier once I got to Azodii and connected with Henry. He and I will come up with a strategy to negotiate with the Premier, and we'll get the contracts signed. Should be easy lawyering. Straightforward. And if what Lord Farkvold said is true, then the Premier may not need any convincing at all. He may want to sign the documents immediately, and finally end his war with Planet Bob.

"Murp, are you ready?"

"Ready! Activating energy portal in three, two -"

I closed my eyes tight as blue energy filled the glass box.

Half of my molecular particles were still in Council Territory when I started to feel the piercing cold winds of Planet Azodii.