I am not myself.

I am another woman, another self who was doing this to survive.

My eyes focused on the body on top of me. But this was not me, it wasn't my gaze that fell upon the man. I am not Fauzia Amani. That girl is not here. She's locked away. I keep her somewhere inside of this body. But she won't come out. She can't come out, because this is not the life she wants to live.

Today I am Larisa. I am 22 years old. I am social, I am witty. I like to seduce and I'm eager to please. I exist to make men happy.

The figure on top of me let out a deep pant. It was not pleasing, his odours made my stomach upset. But Larissa was able to endure it all. She wasn't bothered by this. It was her job. Work is not easy. My bosses always told me "You worry about your body being in pain or hurt? Haha don't make me laugh! Any kind of work requires the body to be broken. If you want to earn money, if you want to survive, you'll have to endure it. And you're not a woman anyone would marry, with such a past."

That was true. Larissa was that kind of woman. But Fauzia was not. She still had a good life ahead of her.

"Here you go whore." My customer said, throwing a bunch of money at me.

"Make sure you'll be more active next time. I'll leave a bad review if you don't." He continued as he got dressed, finally leaving.

Larissa nodded obediently, then made her way to the shower. The water came pouring down on her body, but she couldn't feel it. She hardly felt anything at all,it's like her body just shut off any sensibilities. But when did all this start? Even her memory of that was fuzzy.

Fauzia was trying to break free. She wondered why she had to be one with Larissa. The two didn't have anything in common at all. And yet they lived together in one body. Fauzia had a childhood and a past to call her own, happy memories she locked away somewhere in the depths of her heart. A kind brother, a loving mother, a strong father. But what happened? They loved her all so much and yet weren't able to protect her from becoming one with Larissa?

Something strange overcame my body. I pushed myself against the wall and started to pant heavily.

"I don't... I don't want to do this.... I want to go back..."

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What?!

Go back?

Where to? This is my life, our life. It was normal, everything was as it should be. Sleeping and working. The same routine every day, never changing. Making money to survive. It's the normal lifestyle for any human.

"Haha ha ha... What's wrong with me? Just shut up Fauzia would you? You might be part of me, but I am the main body. We live as I want us to live."

"Hey whore!"

"...."

Someone banged the door open and walked in, forcefully opening the curtains to the shower.

"Talking to yourself again eh? I swear you dumb bitches are all crazy. Is it all the cum that's going to your head making you act like this? You've been showering long enough."

Nadim closed off the water.

"Water flows with money. You haven't paid this month's bill yet, what makes you think you can just leave the water running for hours?"

"I... I didn't think of that. I just wanted to smell good for the next customer. The previous one was rather sweaty..."

"Hmph common now, you've got Parfums to cover any smells. Take a shower when you finish the shift. Most men prefer to put it into a dirty hole anyway. Hahahahahahahaha!"

Crazy laughter filled the room.

Words like this would embarrass any woman who respected herself. Fauzia knew but Larissa long since lost that self respect. So she didn't say anything.

She knew what she had to do and that was all that mattered.

I left the bathroom and dressed myself in some

Lingerie.

"Hold it there." Nadim came over to me and gave my bottom a slap.

"Not hiding your tits. We need plenty tonight." He ripped off my bra and left me there, leaving the room.

".... I should be able to earn more than usual like this. It's fine."

I thought as I went downstairs into the club. My battlefield.

I sat at the bar, making eye contact with the customers, moving my tongue around to invite them in.

"Larissa you're surely having fun there huh? Fine but leave me out of this. Fauzia wants to go. Fauzia wants to go home to see her family. Then she wants to get married and have children of her own."

Yeah right.

Just shut up already, little girl with stupid dreams. Life does not work the way it is presented to us girls in tales.

A knight in shining armour on a white horse? No way in hell. This club was filled with men. Their intentions weren't good. Nothing like a knight in shining armour exists. It's a fantasy, a myth. And this Fauzia, is reality.

My last thoughts struck me when a man, overweight and with crooked teeth, grabbed me.