In the end, what could be said?

Aloy had to keep focus on the threat of Nemesis and the larger picture.

Kotallo was of the Tenakth and responsible for his tribes’ relations with the Carja.

Their relationship could never be permanent or even long lasting.

It was fleeting…like snow melting on her cheek.

Aloy gazed at the ceiling of her room as she lay on her back, Kotallo snoring softly beside her. She turned her head and studied him, the sullen, rude and discouraging Tenakth she’d been saddled with all but forgotten once she got to know him and he, her.

But what were they?

Was it even a relationship?

Or was it, as she’d read in one of the datapoints from the old world, a situation known as ‘friends with benefits’?

Aloy shook her head, a smile on her lips.

No, Kotallo would never think of her like that.

He had already said he loved her.

No one had said that before.

Not even Rost, though he had demonstrated it when he’d sacrificed his life in order to save hers.

All or nothing.

Aloy’s brow furrowed.

So what did she think about it?

What was Kotallo to her?

A passionate embrace?

A physical satiation?

A deeply lustful exploration?

Was there anything more to them?

Could there be anything more?

Or was this, secret liaison and silent ecstasy, all that they could be?

Aloy turned her eyes back to the ceiling, sensing that the lack of ‘relationship’ was probably her doing. She kept a part of her heart in reserve, hiding it away, sure that a ‘normal’ life would, not only chain her to a role that she reviled, but that might well be beyond her capacity.

She snorted softly. Ironic, wasn’t it?

Here she was, a clone of Elisabet Sobeck, a brilliant mind and an innovative thinker…so much so that a domestic life was beyond her reach.

At the thought of her genetic mother, as Aloy had come to think of Elisabet, she recalled Tilda’s words about her. That she always kept part of herself locked away.

Perhaps, then, it was an issue with her genetics?

After all, Aloy and Elisabet were exactly the same.

Same mind.

Same heart.

Same spirit.

Sure they looked different and grew in different environments…but they were essentially the same. And if Elisbaet never let anyone into her heart then maybe Aloy wasn’t capable of it either?

So…what was Aloy doing with Kotallo?

Why had she enticed this man with the hope of more when Aloy wasn’t sure she had it to give, or that she would even if she did?

Was she doomed to break his heart?

Would he be forever wounded?

Aloy got up on her right elbow and gazed at the left side of Kotallo’s chest. There was the inked impression of Aloy’s face, a testament to Kotallo’s committed heart to her. As undone as she had been when she’d first seen the mark, now Aloy only felt despair.

She would destroy him when he realised she was not capable of the kind of relationship that he yearned for.

Quietly she dressed, buckling her armour on and slipped out of her room, crossing the common space to the west exit and onto the colder rock and even colder snow. The snap and chill slapped the tiredness from her bones and she beheld the landscape in its extensive horizon and reminded herself that she was responsible for all of it.

Then she heard the creak and groan of metal and glanced up to see the Sunwings on the nest above turning to catch the sun’s rays, their wings designed to soak the light and turn it into energy. Aloy gazed at them, tapping her teeth.

“One day…I could take just one day off from being the saviour of the world…couldn’t I?”

She had become so adept at overriding machines that she had landed the Sunwing in front of the western exit of the base before more than ten minutes had passed. Then she headed back into the base, knowing the Sunwing would remain where it was for as long as she needed it.

As she crossed the common room she heard her name called and started, seeing Beta yawning and stretching, rubbing sleep from her eyes.

“Aloy,” she blinked wearily, “you’re up early.”

“Oh…well…you know me.” Aloy said weakly.

Beta studied her and Aloy twitched, wondering if her sister knew she had a man in her room.

“Well…I was going to have something to eat then thought you and I could brainstorm some ideas on defeating Nemesis.” Beta suggested.

“That sounds good,” Aloy said then cleared her throat, “although…I was wondering…could I just take off for a day?” Beta gazed at her, concerned and surprised. “I’m not used to being in the base so much. I need to…stretch my wings.”

“Oh…well, sure, I can brainstorm with Gaia.” Beta nodded and Aloy let out her breath. “Is something wrong?”

“Wrong?”

“You act like having a day off is a bad thing.” Beta pointed out. “It sounds nice…”

Aloy’s heart twisted in her chest at Beta’s wistful wish. “Beta, I promise I am going to take you for a day off to do something fun and relaxing.”

Beta sighed. “Not until we get HEPHAESTUS under control and defeat Nemesis. Then I’m going to have lots of ‘days off’.” Aloy started to question her selfish day off request. “You go, though. You’re used to open horizons. All that space…scares me.” Beta glanced around. “I like walls. I feel safe in them.”

“As long as you’re sure you’ll be alright?”

“I’m sure.” Beta nodded. Aloy knew, to someone who didn’t know her, that Beta would seem insecure and jittery…but considering what she was like when Aloy had rescued her and she’d tasted freedom for the first time, her timidity was leagues away from the terror she’d been infested with.

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Aloy nodded and escaped back to her room, closing the door behind her. Kotallo was already up, strapping his armour on as best he could with one arm. He was becoming quite adept at it.

“You’re already awake?” Aloy asked then closed her eyes, feeling foolish at the observation.

“I must be at Barren Light by nightfall to leave with the envoy in the morning,” Kotallo explained, “I already begged for this detour to see you before I kept travelling east…I ought not to be late.”

Aloy bit her bottom lip. “Kotallo…I can get you there much faster.”

Kotallo studied her. “What could possibly go faster than a Charger?”

Aloy raised her eyebrows and gave a smile. “Follow me.”

After making sure Beta was not in the common room, Aloy led Kotallo through the base and out the western exit to where the Sunwing rested mere feet from the door. Aloy ran ahead and leapt onto its back, twisting to look at Kotallo.

“Come.” She urged, holding out her hand.

“I…am to ride…like the Wings of the Ten?” He whispered, awestruck.

Aloy’s heart cracked at his hesitation. Despite his honour, his bravery and sacrifice, Kotallo only ever saw himself as a lowly foot soldier. He didn’t know he had the heart of a noble general.

“Fly with me.” She said and he blinked and saw her nod. He swallowed and then, making the decision, ran forward and, with one foot digging into the Sunwing’s ribs, launched himself onto its back, his hand grasping hers. Aloy drew it over her head to wrap around her waist, his body pressed up hard against her.

“You’re going to have to hold on.” She warned then felt his breath against her neck.

“I am.”

Aloy shivered at the light stroke of his fingers across her abdomen. She clutched at the cords she used to control the Sunwing with and cried out, kicking its side. It pumped its wings and launched from the ledge outside the base, immediately airborne and rising higher and higher. Kotallo’s arm clutched firmly about her and she could feel the squeeze of his legs gripping the machine’s back. Because he only had one arm, Kotallo had learnt to hang onto to the backs of Chargers with his knees.

They climbed higher, passing overhead of the Tenakth camp just down the mountain from the base’s western exit and began to soar across the blistering landscape of the Desert Clan’s territory. The air was prickling with new day freshness but the sun’s rays were already warm and dancing across the tops of the clouds, a brisk breeze driving them away so that an unimpeded blue sky could be draped over their world.

Kotallo was silent but Aloy suspected he would be. He was not inclined for gushing metaphors or excessive emotion but she could have sworn tremors of thrilling delight were pulsing through his legs. It was understandable that, for at least twenty minutes, he was so overcome by the notion of flight that it didn’t occur to him the direction they were heading.

“Aloy,” he said close to her ear, “Barren Light is behind us.”

“I know,” Aloy turned her head slightly so he could hear her, “but there’s somewhere special I want to take you.”

She felt him nod and he didn’t question her again as the Sunwing easily passed over the mountain range that separated the Desert Clan from the forest heavy landscape where Memorial Grove was embedded. Over the top of it, it was only a small ring below and Aloy felt Kotallo huff, no doubt stunned at how little it was. Still further west they flew, passing close to the tops of the giant snowy mountain range that, at the north of, the Sky Clan made their home. The air was thin and icy and the moment they clipped the tallest peak, Aloy turned the Sunwing’s nose down and they descended to the tall forested landscape of the Lowland Clan.

Kotallo gasped and pointed.

Aloy already knew what he had seen.

The stretch of water, untraversable to the Tenakth, lay before them, a streak of golden sunlight sparkling over its blue waves.

Still further west they headed although Aloy urged the Sunwing to head take a southerly heading, passing beyond the stretch of sand and over the tops of a couple of small islands.

“You make for the Isle of Spires?”

“No,” Aloy shook her head, “not quite. That island there.”

Kotallo nodded and they continued, the flight taking less than an hour to across what would have taken a day on Charger back and on foot, several days. Aloy landed the Sunwing on the beach and gave Kotallo a moment to disembark before swinging her leg over and jumping down and walking towards the stone steps that began a little ways back from where the sand and waves ended and the land began proper.

“So, your first flight…what did you think?” She asked, turning around then faltered, seeing Kotallo kneeing in the sand, his head bowed. “Kotallo?” He was murmuring something and she crept closer.

“…that I lived long enough to experience what the rest of my tribe have only ever dreamed of. I am not worthy…but thank you.”

Aloy swallowed and stepped back, sensing that Kotallo was almost praying and felt awkward about being so close. He rose from the sand and looked at her with his cool blue eyes, unashamed but unwilling to speak.

“I…uh…this way.” She gestured, turned and led him to the steps. They climbed together, greenery rising around them and the small stone hill they traversed.

“You have been here before.”

“When I was searching for some of Regalla’s rebels that escaped on a raft, I came across this place.”

As they continued higher Kotallo’s surprise was not unexpected.

“This place…it looks like a Utaru’s shrine…”

Given how far they were from Utaru’s beloved Plainsong, to find evidence of the vegetarian, landgod worshipping tribe on an island that not even the Tenakth could reach, was astonishing. There were woven mats, candles, plants and on a tiny plateau, which afforded a view of the Isle of Spires, a letter to a fallen loved one.

“A place to remember.” Aloy sank onto the mat and gestured to the letter. “Here we remember our friend, with a view as calming as his voice, on stone as strong as his spirit. He was not just our rock. He was our oak, sturdy and stoic, whose presence brought us comfort and whose branches touched us all. Rest in peace.”

They sat in silence, hearing the waves crash softly on the shore, rock formations creating arches in the water where light sparkled over the cresting tide.

“When you read that letter,” Kotallo asked reverently, “do you think of your protector and carer, Rost?”

Aloy smiled sadly. “When I first read it, yes, I admit I did.” She could sense his confusion and turned to him. “But now, you share part of this place.”

Kotallo’s gaze remained steady on her. “But I am not dead.”

Aloy’s heart trembled. “No…I know that…just the words…they remind me of you.”

Kotallo didn’t nod but his head bowed. “Then I am in good company.” His fingers, stretched out on the mat, lightly brushed her hand. “Aloy…”

They were both silenced at the rumbling of Kotallo’s stomach. He grimaced. “Forgive me. I did not eat last night or this morning…”

“Both times that was my fault.” Aloy gritted her teeth. “I should have thought to pack food for us.” She looked up at Kotallo as he stood, his shadow casting over her.

“Atekka once said, when you learn to fish, you will never starve.”

Aloy raised an eyebrow. “You’re going to fish?”

Kotallo tapped his FOCUS. “With this, how can I miss?”

They descended the rocky hill and across the little island to where there was an inlet, shaded by the arch of stone. Aloy collected bracken and twigs, letting Kotallo wade into the water while she built a fire. Once it was alight she found some stones and rinsed them in the water before setting them on the fire. Their wet, heavy bodies almost doused the flames and those that remained heated the stones. The fish would cook easily on the residual heat.

Her job done she twisted to see how Kotallo was doing.

He had shed his upper armour and tunic, his torso completely bare as he stood in the water up to his knees, a hastily fashioned spear in his hand. Already there were two fish tied on a loop of wire to his belt and his gaze was hard focused on the water. Aloy was astounded by the large and striking inking on his back. The Tenakth were marked, quite literally, by their deeds and Kotallo’s greatest triumph, in the eyes of his people, was when he threw open the gates at Barren Light, allowing his people to charge through and drive the Carja out.

He had nearly died in the attempt.

His best friend had perished on the treacherous climb.

The marking was of Kotallo standing with the iron gate in his hands, four shafts of light piercing his body. Even as she gazed at him, Aloy realised she could see three out of the four scars on his back.

She shivered, her mouth drying out even as her blood began to pulse.

She closed her eyes and licked her lips.

If she was going to do what she needed to…it would have to be now.

She undressed enough that her intent could not be mistaken for anything else and waded into the water to be with him. When Kotallo turned and saw her, his jaw dropped open.

“By the Ten…”

She slid her arms up his chest and kissed him firmly before drawing him to the sand where they made love in the surf, crashing together like the waves breaking upon the sand.

Aloy pushed herself up on shaking forearms, seeing Kotallo’s eyes blazing brightly at her.

“Was that enough?”

Her words had a second meaning and she suspected that Kotallo understood them for he blinked and the brilliance of his countenance dulled, the sun disappearing behind the clouds and the sand turned grey around them. Aloy held her tongue in place behind her teeth lest she blurt out a retraction. Kotallo pushed himself up on his right elbow, his eyes dropping from hers.

“More than enough.”

Aloy could feel him retreating from her, in more ways than one. She stood up and stepped back, cleansing herself in the shallows before dressing quickly. Not once did she look at Kotallo, her heart close to breaking. She glanced at the fire and kicked sand over it.

She wasn’t hungry anymore.

When Kotallo was dressed they made their way to the Sunwing and without a word spoken, flew across the breadth of the Forbidden West to the slope that led to Barren Light. Kotallo alighted at its base just as the sun was starting to sink in the sky and the shadows grew as long as the ones in Aloy’s heart.

“Good luck in Meridian.” Aloy offered after hours of silence.

“Aloy,” she cringed and turned back to him, “it was…a good day.”

Aloy licked her lips and nodded, turned and kicked into the Sunwing. It launched into the sky and pumped its wings, heading back to the base’s location. She didn’t look back. She couldn’t. She couldn’t second guess herself. Not now.

Not when she didn’t know herself.

When as she was approaching the base, her FOCUS pinged into life.

“Aloy?”

“Sylens?”

“Where the devil have you been? I’ve been trying to reach you all day.”

“What’s the problem?”

“There’s an issue arising that requires your attention. Come to me at Tilda’s residence and I’ll explain further.”

Aloy sighed. “That’s all I need. Another hour on this Sunwing at the word of the enigmatic Sylens…great.”