Jacob decided that he would talk to Tarim after the business on Gamuun was concluded. That way, there would be no other distractions.

In the end, they arrived at their destination a bit early at 17 days, which Danger explained was a consequence of ‘smooth wayline skips’, which Jacob suspected were due in large part to Johnny’s passive luck silently optimizing their travel.

Gamuun was a large, verdant planet filled with forests, wetlands, and expansive oceans. The crew going down to the planet—Jacob, Fenris, Bob, Johnny, and Anton—left the Quickdraw in orbit and took the lander down, allowing the secondary instance of the new AI, Vivi, to control the smaller vessel. Breaching the heavy atmosphere was rough going, but the lander held together well.

Anton gave some rough directions for where they were supposed to find Gorgobaryx, and Vivi spent an hour taking them across the wide, green landscape of giant trees, crossing half a continent in the process. He caught a few glimpses of what looked like populated settlements along the way, but they were gone too quick for him to confirm one way or another.

“Gentlemen, we have reached our destination,” Vivi said in her light, synthesized voice as the lander began to slow. “No need to suit up. The air will be quite breathable for humans, but it is recommended that you keep continuous exposure to the local atmosphere under 24 hours before your bodies have acclimated.”

She set them down over the edge of a great lake, descending among tree trunks that had to be at least ten meters across. When they touched earth, clustered huts and small shelters came into view, wisps of smoke trailing out of any gaps.

Anton was eager to disembark when the cockpit opened up, but Jacob beat him out, vaulting over the edge of the silvery vessel and landing in soft soil. The air was heavy and humid, almost to the point of making it difficult to draw breath.

The others followed behind him in exiting the lander while he scanned the surrounding area.

He caught sight of roughly humanoid aliens almost immediately among the primitive buildings, but no one approached to greet or hassle them.

The lubbards were frog-like in appearance. They were all reclined in various positions, but Jacob estimated that they would have been maybe five feet or less standing upright. They came in a range of colors from green to blue to purple to yellow to red, with some patterned in two or more colors. They hardly batted an eye at the newcomers, puffing lazily from hookahs made of large gourds, inflating their vocal sacs with smoke before breathing it all back out through little flat nostrils.

Jacob approached the nearest one; a wrinkled, rust-red creature with half-lidded eyes barely showing their flat, horizontal pupils. He lay spread eagle in the dirt wearing only a ragged loincloth, limply clutching one of several mouthpieces to a nearby hookah. Other equally lost members of his species were also gathered around the contraption.

“Excuse me,” Jacob said, a bit taken off-guard. “We are here to meet with Gorgobaryx, the dragon. Do you know him?”

Since they were out of System range, they would not have the luxury of free translations. Maybe Vivi had something backed up in her data banks, if it came to that.

The lubbard did not reply, but began to move with painful slowness. The others had caught up by the time he made it onto his feet, blinking up at them like they were some kind of fever dream. Then again, to him they were no doubt a pack of strange-looking creatures that had suddenly descended onto their world.

But the lubbard did not interrogate them or attempt to bar their advance. He turned and began traipsing down towards the lake, motioning for them to follow.

“They must have been told to expect us,” Anton said and went after the little alien.

Other lubbards barely spared them a glance as they passed through the settlement. Huts were made from large strips of bark, so thick as to almost resemble planks, stuck together with some gluey, milk-white substance. More improvised shelters were made from stretched-out tarps of roughly woven plant fibers.

The lubbard took them out from the vaulted tree canopy, down to a long rocky shore covered in slimy green algae. In the distance there were others of his kind gathered around a flat barge, moored to a small jetty.

Jacob took off his shoes and socks before braving the goopy strand, and Johnny followed his example. Fenris sniffed at the algae, then began licking it, evidently fascinated with the flavor.

Their guide exchanged a few gibbering words with his people on the jetty, and Jacob and the others were summarily handed off. These lubbards were only somewhat less intoxicated, packing large tied bundles of herbs onto the barge. They stopped for frequent smoke breaks, puffing at long pipes that they kept slung through their loin cloths when not in use, each of them carrying a pouch of crushed-up leaves to stuff their pipes with.

Jacob and the others waited on the barge for maybe thirty minutes before they finally cast off, cutting across the still, black waters. The lubbards used long wooden poles to push off against the bottom and keep them moving.

“They better not be taking us across this whole fucking lake,” Johnny said sullenly. He prodded at his hair, which had lost some of its volume in the damp. “If that’s the case, we should have just taken the lander across, talk to the frogs on the other side.”

“We’ll see,” Jacob said. “We don’t know exactly where Gorgobaryx is, so we’ll let them lead the way.”

“I have never been on a boat before,” Bob confessed, clutching his broom.

“How are you liking it so far?”

“I am waterproof, so my systems would survive being submerged if I happened to fall in. However, I cannot swim. I am afraid.”

“It’s okay, Robby Robot,” Johnny said with a sigh. “Just stay close to me, and nothing bad’ll happen to you.”

“I know that. It is what they call an ‘irrational fear’.

“Maybe not that irrational,” Jacob muttered as the vessel’s bark bottom creaked beneath his feet, keenly aware that both he and Bob were substantially heavier than any of the lubbards, or even three of the doughy little critters.

They were headed for a small island at the center of the lake, several of those giant trees rising from it. One of the lubbards offered Jacob his pipe, but he declined as politely as he could, hoping it would translate well enough.

They made it to the island, and the barge was moored to another jetty. The lubbards disembarked, grabbing a herb bundle each before trudging up the steep, boulder-covered incline to the center of the island. Jacob and the others followed.

They crested the highest point of the island and looked down at a bowl-shaped depression in the ground, ringed by a rough semi-circle of great trees.

Taking up most of the space was an enormous red-scaled lizard, its long tail snaking among the trees, its head resting on its folded arm. The dragon had a hookah of his own, many times larger than any the lubbards used and standing maybe twice as tall as Jacob himself. The dragon puffed idly on the mouthpiece, smoke streaming from the corners of his mouth.

All curled up, it was difficult to guess at the length of the beast himself, but it was definitely several dozen meters. Jacob would easily have fit inside his mouth. Maybe the entire group at once would.

The lubbards went about and threw the herb bundles onto smoking incense braziers that set them vomiting fresh fumes, which settled like an obscuring gray blanket over the ground. One of them went up to the dragon and knocked on his nose without any noticeable show of fear, only backing away a few steps when the beast lifted his boulder of a head, the hookah’s hose trailing along the ground.

Gorgobaryx towered over them, the dangling skin of his long neck quivering as he let out a rumble like rolling thunder, and a long beard of soft spines dangled from his chin. A great section of the scales on his chest had been blasted away, radiating into several projections like a star, with only puckered scar tissue in its place. He was also missing one arm below the elbow.

No wings.

Sir Anton gazed up at the dragon, mouth slightly agape, and looked uncertain for the first time since Jacob had met him. Then he took a few uncertain steps forward, raising his arms in a simultaneous gesture of greeting and offered peace.

“Lord Gorgobaryx, you honored one!” he called out. To his credit, his voice only shook a little. “I am Sir Anton, son of Lord Alfonse, a high baron of Mars. I speak for him and the other barons. We have come to treat with you, and hope that you might extend your hospitality to us.”

Jacob wondered if the dragon really understood English, and received a nearly instant answer to that question.

Yes, I was told of your coming, a thought flashed in Jacob’s mind, dark and deep. It was not English, nor even language, just pure sensory impressions that he somehow understood perfectly. I feared you would not come. Time is short. Who are these others?

A telepath.

Anton motioned to Jacob. “This is Sir Jacob Sorenson, a great hero of Earth. He is one of the Nine who emerged victorious after defeating the demon lord in the final battle there. And these three are his companions.”

The way they were speaking all stilted and fancy back-and-forth, a knight and a dragon, further deepened Jacob’s sense of being in some cheap King Arthur theater production.

Gorgobaryx raised his arm—which had five articulated digits just like a human’s, except they ended in long claws—and extended it towards Jacob. He compelled himself not to move as the massive limb crept towards him. Fenris growled, lowering his weight to pounce, but Jacob called him off with a sharp hiss and a snap of his fingers.

Gorgobaryx hooked a sword of a claw over the collar of Jacob’s shirt with surprising gentleness, dragging his shirt down until the black mark on his chest was revealed. The dragon gave a low rumble, smoke escaping around its double rows of wicked teeth.

Interesting, he mused. You have many enemies, little human, to have faced the demons of the urgeks and the Dark One, too.

“I prefer to make friends, when possible,” Jacob said, forcing a smile. “I believe you’re an acquaintance of my friend, Grim. Maybe you remember him.”

Gorgobaryx pulled his hand away and grasped the hookah mouthpiece instead, puffing thoughtfully and exhaling two flaming jets through his cavernous nostrils. Ah. Another interesting human. I am more familiar with his other moniker—the Wanderer.

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“What about Ender? You know of him?”

He has been known to skulk about from time to time. Boorish. I do not pay him any mind.

“Maybe if we can get back on track,” Anton said, clearing his throat. He played nervously with the card deck on his hip. “Lord Gorgobaryx, have you had a chance to ponder the terms proposed by my father?”

First we smoke, the dragon announced. You must partake, that I may be confident of your goodwill.

Anton hesitated, glancing towards the looming hookah gourd. “Ah, well… Then, I suppose…”

“Wait,” Jacob said, stepping up to the knight. “We’ve prepared with a bit of human smoke, if you wouldn’t mind.” He took the single cigarette Grim had given him out of his pocket, lit it off one of the braziers, and handed it to Anton. He’d been debating whether or not to smoke it, but now he was happy to have kept it.

He imagined a little tar was probably better than having the young noble ingesting large quantities of some unknown alien substance.

Very well. Smoke is the highest stimulant of diplomatic spirit. I am glad to see that you humans take it seriously, as well.

Anton took a tentative drag off the cigarette and exhaled all at once with a stifled cough. The dragon quickly lowered his head and sniffed hard to catch the smoke, pulling in so much air that Jacob’s clothes fluttered with the suction.

Oh, it is very mild, the dragon mused. But it has a pleasant aroma.

“It’s called tobacco,” Jacob said. “It’s a very popular recreational substance on Ea— For humans.”

Tobacco. Yes, I believe your friend the Wanderer enjoys this as well. Perhaps I should have my servants fetch it on some occasion. Maybe it would make a nice base for my incense.

“I am certain we could have a large quantity transported to you for your convenience, as a gift,” Anton said with a slight incline of his head.

Jacob took the cigarette back from him to puff on himself, then gave it over to Johnny, just so that the dragon didn’t start suspecting them of being undiplomatic types. Bob made a nice show of pretending to smoke, poking the cigarette repeatedly against his faceplate with a plink, plink, plink before going: “Mmm, yes. Full-bodied. Yes, the aroma.”

“Do you feel our terms are agreeable?” Anton continued.

Ah, yes. I am quite pleased. However, there is just one more thing I shall have to insist upon.

“Whatever it might be, I’m certain it can be done.

I would like four human females brought here to become my servants in perpetuity. Of prime age and health.

“That’s…” Anton looked visibly disturbed, glancing at the others. “That’s not how humans do things, you realize. We cannot simply give people away.”

I insist.

“Why do you need these servants in the first place?”

That is my own concern.

“I don’t think…”

“Are you planning on hurting them?” Jacob asked.

No.

“Are you planning on mistreating them?”

Certainly not.

“Will you see to their needs?”

Of course.

“Then he accepts.”

The knight turned towards Jacob with a look of utter shock. “Sir Jacob, watch your words! Do not presume to speak for me as I wield the authority of my father! I cannot condone this act, which would indeed be no better than condemning four women to slavery.”

Jacob crossed his arms, repressing a sigh. “Great. I admire your nobility, good Sir Knight. Gorgobaryx is a valuable ally, yes? A powerful magic user?”

“Well yes, but—”

“And I’m sure you could find four women on all of Mars who think that spending the rest of their lives with a dragon sounds like a great idea. I’m sure you’ll be making someone’s dreams come true. So you see, it won’t be slavery at all. Just quid pro quo.”

“Well, I…”

“Do you think your father would be happy if you put your personal pride as a knight or whatever over this alliance? Do you think he’d greet you with a hug and a pat on the back?”

“No.”

“There you go. So tell the fucking dragon you’ll give him his fucking human concubines.”

Anton looked like he was about to argue back, his face gone red with indignation, but then he slowly composed himself and turned back to the dragon. “Yes, okay. As long as you swear to take good care of them and see to all their needs for as long as they live.”

This I swear.

“Then these terms are agreeable to us. You will receive a mountain of gold equivalent to ten billion in our money, a minor urgek world of your choosing, and… four human women to become your servants.” His voice became forced for the last part, as though it pained him to speak the words. “This is to be delivered at the earliest possible time.”

Good.

“And in return, you will turn all your might to killing urgeks until each and every one of them have been eradicated, and you will cooperate and coordinate with the agents of the Crusade of Reprisal.”

I will do this. And I will have to begin straight away, I fear.

“What do you mean?”

An advance urgek fleet is coming here for the same reason as you—to win my cooperation, and to establish a staging ground on Gamuun from which to preemptively invade your worlds. I am pleased that we were able to come to an agreement—otherwise, I would have been forced to entertain those odious brutes. However, they are almost upon us already.

“You didn’t think to tell us this sooner?” Jacob asked, his mind instantly aflame with the implications this presented.

As I said, if he had not reached an agreement, it would have been in my best interests to cooperate with them, instead. I would have taken you captive and presented you to the urgeks as a show of good faith.

“Right. Well, how much time do we have?”

Not much. Expressed in your time units… Maybe two or three hours? We will either have to repel them, or you will have to buy me enough time to allow my servants an escape into the waylines. They are no fighters, and I will not leave them behind to be slaughtered.

Jacob hadn’t expected loyalty from a dragon. How inconvenient. Otherwise they might have had enough time to flee on the Quickdraw.

Beating back an entire urgek fleet did not sound like good odds. Remembering the one that had invaded Arcadia, Jacob thought maybe he could tear his way through enough urgeks to disable one ship, possibly two or three if some miracle came to pass.

“How large is this fleet?” he asked. “How much of it do you think you could handle yourself?”

The number of ships is difficult to estimate, but between fifty and one hundred, I should guess. I will be able to hamper their approach, but against their focused firepower, I fear I may falter before the work is done.

“Don’t worry, guys,” Johnny spoke up, still messing with his hair. “No need to get all worked up over this stuff. I’ll handle it.”

“You’ll… handle it?” Anton asked.

“Mmhmm.”

“On your own?”

“Yep. I’m feeling lucky today. This is the opportunity I’ve been waiting for.”

Who is this little one, to be so confident? Gorgobaryx asked.

Johnny bowed with a grand flourish. “John Palatini, at your service.” He gave a winning smile when he came up. “They call me Gold Rush.”

“You’re going to do the gambling thing, aren’t you?” Jacob guessed.

“That’s right.”

“Do you really think it’ll do the trick? Against a whole fleet of urgeks?”

“If I get my luck high enough, I don’t see why not.”

They all shared glances with each other. Finally, Jacob said: “All right, man. If you want to give it a shot, go ahead. I guess we’ll get you back to the lander, then.”

“No need.” Johnny raised his hand, and his gold coin suddenly flashed between his fingers. “I’ll make my own way.”

“O… kay?”

“I bet my life.” He flipped the coin, caught it, smacked it down on the back of his hand. “Heads. Two units.”

He went again. “Heads. Four units.”

“Heads. Eight units.”

“Heads. Sixteen units.”

“Heads. Thirty-two units.”

“Heads. Sixty-four units.”

“Heads. 128 units.”

“Heads. 256 units.”

Gorgobaryx reared back, falling on his side, his tail lashing about him. The look of wide-eyed fear looked completely bizarre on the face of the fearsome creature. What… What is he doing? He’s warping everything.

“Heads! 512 units!” Johnny announced.

Jacob started backing away. It was probably best not to be too close to him at the moment.

He flipped the coin once more, called it. “Heads! 1024 units!”

There was a bright flash of multi-colored light, a pillar that crashed down right where Johnny was standing and completely enveloped him in its overwhelming glow. Bob—who had been standing closest—scrambled away and narrowly avoided being swallowed up in it.

Then the rainbow beam suddenly vanished. And Johnny was gone with it.

He bent a wayline, Gorgobaryx said. Even though he did not use words to speak, Jacob felt his fear and awe through the telepathic projection. What is he? What is this power?

“He’s just really lucky,” Jacob said absently, watching up high as the last shimmer faded in the sky.

He started a timer on his interface. Johnny would have ten minutes of extreme luck before he’d need to start re-upping it.

I wonder if he’s still doubling it, even now.

Several minutes passed. No one said anything. They just looked to the sky. The braziers crackled in the silence, and the lubbards looked on in sheer confusion, babbling with each other in their own tongue. The dragon puffed nervously on his hookah.

Then there was a small burst of golden light in the dirty blue sky of Gamuun. A very distant explosion. Followed by another. And another. And another. Then a handful at once. Then dozens in a wide cluster.

“My god,” Jacob said. “He’s doing it.”

“I can’t believe it,” Anton murmured.

The only thing Jacob had to compare it to was Paragon. What Johnny was doing was U-Rank level, undoubtedly.

We found you one, Paragon. Someone to carry your burden.

As long as he doesn’t kill himself.

A moment later, the sky lit up once more with a hundred criss-crossing rainbows. Once bore down right among them, and Johnny stepped out of the storm of tempestuous energy. His eyes were closed in ecstacy. He threw up his arms, and something came down, raining through the tree canopy and hitting the ground with dull thuds like hail.

A piece of it struck Jacob in the head, heavy enough to produce a pinprick of pain. He caught it out of the air as it bounced away from him.

In his hand was a little nugget of gleaming gold.

It was raining gold.

“One million units!” Johnny cried. “Guys, I think I’m cumming!” With a laugh, he brought the coin up on his thumb. “I bet my life.”

Oh, shit.

Jacob recognized that obsession. The need to revel in his power. Jacob ran for Johnny to try and restrain him, without holding out much hope that it would actually work given his monstrous levels of luck.

A stone came loose under him, and when he tried to catch himself he slipped again, falling on his ass. He flipped back onto his feet, but a gold nugget cracked open a lens of his sunglasses and caught him right in the eye, causing him to flinch.

Johnny flipped the coin, caught it. “Heads! Two million!” He pointed at the cowering dragon. “Gorgo-whatever! We have a deal, right?”

The dragon blinked, the pupils of his yellow eyes gone thin as a knife’s edge. Yes. We have a deal.

“You can keep this stuff, too.” He motioned at the precious metal coming down all around them, piling up on the ground in a thin layer that reflected rainbow light. “You don’t mind if we get out of here, do you?”

No?

“Great!” Johnny laughed and clapped his hands together.

All the light pillars warped and twisted, whipping down towards the island in a luminous web.

Jacob had only managed half a step when one swallowed him up, and he was thrown spinning into an endless corridor of pure energy, his entire being seeming to stretch out.

He couldn’t see anyone, but he heard Johnny’s gleeful laughter echo through the wayline.

Jacob fell.

“What the fuck!” he screamed.