PAINFUL HONESTY

Tonight, dinner was served on the veranda outdoors. The candlelit dinner by the sea with the wind

blowing in my face and hair reminded me of the dinner I had on the stargazing tower with Edward. The

romantic atmosphere wasn’t the only reason that I was reminded of that night Edward told me about

the fact that he saved me all those years ago in the forest. I felt that tonight, I will come to learn of

some important hidden truth that will change the course of my life once again.

Lucien didn’t beat around the bush, thankfully so. After the maids left us alone, Lucien started talking

immediately as I sat opposite him. Similar to the dinner I had with Edward that time, the food tasted like

dry sand on my tongue.

“Can you tell me what it was like living with your mother? You know, before I met you two…” Lucien

asked slightly hesitantly.

“Why are you asking after all this time? I thought my mother probably told you everything already,” I

replied, thinking that it was unusual for him to bring this up. What good will asking about my childhood

do?

“She did tell me, but I want to hear your version of the story more,” Lucien replied firmly.

“What do you want to know…specifically?” I asked him without bothering to hide my suspicion. This is the property of Nô-velDrama.Org.

“Your living conditions. How did you two get by? Did your mother work? What type of school did you go

to? All the general stuff. Just tell me whatever comes to mind,” Lucien replied.

“I don’t know why you’re asking me this and I was quite young back then. Anyways, my mother and I

lived alone. It was just the two of us. My mother didn’t have a fulltime job. She worked on whatever job

she was offered or sometimes she didn’t work at all. We always lived alone, and we moved places

quite often…probably once every few months. Whenever that happened, I had to move school if the

new place was too far from the old one. I didn’t have any close friends and my mother didn’t seem to

have many friends either…so it was largely just the two of us,” I replied with an honest view of how I

remembered my life from back then.

“So…it was always just the two of you?” Lucien asked a little surprised. I couldn’t quite understand why

he was surprised.

“Yes, there was never anyone else,” I replied flatly. If Lucien wondered if my mother had a boyfriend of

some sort on the side; then he can rest assured that she didn’t. However, if she did, I had never heard

of or seen him before.

“What do you know…about your father?” Lucien asked seriously.

“What am I supposed to know? My mother never talked about him…except for that he left her after

finding out that she was pregnant with me. She’s never seen or heard from him since. I don’t know his

face or his name and, just as my mother advised, we think of him as better off dead,” I replied

emotionlessly. I hated my father for leaving us, yet I didn’t quite hate him. It’s hard to hate someone you

don’t know anything about at all.

“I see…” Lucien answered as he seemed deep in his own thoughts.

“Why are you asking this all of a sudden?” I asked, genuinely curious.

“No reason…” Lucien replied in a low whisper.

The candlelight flickering in his green eyes made it seem like his eyes were wavering with hesitation.

Lucien would never ask questions like these without a logical reason which meant that there was

something he wanted to confirm. Depending on my answer, he may or may not tell me something…but

what was he going to tell me?

“Lucien…if there’s something you wanted to tell me…” I started to say before I was interrupted by

another question.

“Do you remember how your mother died?” Lucien asked too directly for my frail heart to handle.

Of course, I remember. I remember everything about the day she died as if it had happened yesterday.

Although, there wasn’t much to be remembered at all.

“Yes, I do…” I replied in a small voice as I tried to keep back my tears.

“Tell me…what happened…” Lucien instructed slowly yet firmly.

“I think you know this better than I do…my mother died in a car accident. I got a call from you telling me

that she was in an accident and that she was at the hospital. However, when I arrived, she was

already…gone…” I replied with my version of that day before stopping when my voice started to crack

with sorrow.

That day, when I arrived at the hospital, my mother was already dead. I never made it in time to bid her

farewell. Thinking back, I never got to see her face for the last time. When I grew up, I figured out that

her body was probably not in the condition to be viewed by relatives, let alone a minor.

“The truth is…I didn’t make it in time either. When I arrived, your mother was already gone,” Lucien

stated sadly.

“It doesn’t matter anymore. She’s gone…she’s not coming back,” I replied with clenched teeth.

“I want to tell you so many things, Natalia. All those things, you will find to be shocking and so, I

honestly don’t know where to start or what to tell you. Perhaps, because of that you’ve been in so much

pain…” Lucien confessed truthfully as he looked away towards the dark ocean.

“What do you mean…?” I asked.

Lucien was silent as he thought over his words. I could tell that he was very conflicted about what he

was going to tell me. The suspense and sense of foreboding was killing me.

“Lucien…please…” I pleaded as I took his hand in mine and squeezed it.

“It’s going to hurt you…more than it has been hurting me all these years,” Lucien stated as he glanced

back at me.

“I’ll take it…please tell me,” I said firmly.

“I see. Maybe you’ve grown to be much stronger than before. Natalia, your dear mother…was

murdered,” Lucien stated in a painful voice.

My mother…was killed?!

That can’t be, I thought as I felt tears running down my face…

--To be continued…