Motherfucker. I couldn’t focus at school at all today. The memory would just replay over and over until the day ended before I realized it. I need to eat some ice cream to get my mind off of this.

I walk from the bus stop to Jenny’s, the best fukin ice cream you will eat in the world. This is gonna be amazing. I feel around my pocket in search of my wallet.

…

*sigh*

I forgot it at home. Ugh. Should I just call Marvin to bring me money by asking him to hang out at Jenny’s? Nevermind, it isn’t worth talking to that insensitive muscle-for-brains meathead. I continue to walk back home.

I watch the beautiful untouchable sunset, feeling a connection to the warm light it cast on me. Then suddenly, a man in a trench coat runs out in front of me. Oh shit, am I getting mugged?

“Hey kid, check this out,” the man says.

I can’t help but think that either he is going to flash me or try to sell me drugs.

Before I say anything, he pulls his trenchcoat apart. I instinctively wince, but instead of the hairy, nude dad bod I expect to see, I just see keychains. I sigh with relief. My purity remains intact.

Observing the unique keychains, my disgust quickly turns into interest. All of the chains have animals made out of some kind of crystal attached to them. My eye is drawn to a ruby red fish keychain, shimmering in the sunlight. It’s a shame I don’t have any money.

“Sorry, I don’t have any money on me right now,” I tell him my circumstances.

Instead of immediately leaving while spewing curse, he reaches inside his coat and takes out the ruby fish I was eyeing.

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“I see you like this red seabass, so I’ll gift it to you. I know you’ll pay me back one day,” he stuffs the ruby fish in my hand and scurries off around the corner.

Hell yea. Free stuff. Let's go. I make my way home in high spirits.

…

These godam n00bs. Theyr mechonics r shit. Eye kant curry them b-cuz theyr 2 heavy 5 me. I cunt git out of bronze 6 b-cuz ov my stoopid teem8s. I deserve Challenjour. Gg.

“WHY DOES 1 CHAMPION BLOCK 3! MOTHERFUCKER. WHY DOES THE TURRET ATTACK RIFT HERALD. EAT MY ASS! FUCKIN SHIT. GIT THE FUCK OUT OF MY LANE YOU AUTISTIC SHITS,” I yell in rage.

My body gets warmer as I feel my blood boil. RITO FUCKING GAMES.

“REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE,” I wield my fist and slam it into my computer screen. I make contact with it, but instead of the hard thud I expected, I feel as though I’m punching through jello. My hand goes through the entire screen and makes a gaping hole in the middle. The edges of the hole are red with heat and are visibly melting.

“HOLY SHIT. I NEED ANOTHER COMPUTER NOW. GODDAMNIT,” I scream, taking my fist and slamming it towards the desk. Like the computer screen, my fist smashes through the table and it burst into flames. Now I need a new desk too. Then it finally dawned on me that something is out of the ordinary.

“My profiteroles are already done. SHIT!” I say, rushing downstairs to check on my pastries. However, my eyelids get heavy and I can’t keep them open. I lose strength in my body as I collapse.

*Thud*

I wake up with a pounding headache. Where the fuck am I? Oh, I’m on the floor. Thank god my parents are out of town right now. What happened? Was I making profiteroles?

Wait, how did I punch through my computer?

Maybe I’m just naturally strong. No, it’s not possible. My dad has to be strong like Devin’s dad for me to be blessed genetically.

I rush upstairs to see the aftermath to find a figure in a black hoodie. Oh shit, am I getting mugged?

“So I see you have awakened,” the potential robber addresses me with a voice higher than expected.

“Who are you? What are you doing in my home? Why are you here? Where did you buy that hoodie? Is it designer?,” I yell back confused. Is it a woman? Because her thighs b thiccc.

The maybe female calmly pulls back her hood to reveal two sharp eyes that look as though they could pierce right through me. She stands confident as if unmovable by our filthy mortal desires, as her long, black, and gravity-defying hair flows through to air like a serpent. There's no air current tho. I pause and take a good look at her face only to realize that it’s Yuka Nakama, the girl that all the Asian boyz lust after.

“How’s it going Sebas?” she asks, staring into my wide eyes.