Arriving at the bus stop, I can’t help but marvel at how great my life is. I’m slowly expanding my influence over the school. The only issue is that I go to this rich ass private school full of degenerates and spoiled shitheads that can’t even spell the word “priviledged.”
As I take out my water bottle to take a drink, I can’t help but think about how boring my fucking life is. Using my superior coordination I take out the water bottle in the most efficie- Oh shit, I dropped it.
It hits the ground and bounces into the streets. What the fuck are water bottles made out of these days?
I run into the streets to retrieve my bottle when a bright light comes out of nowhere. I turn around to see a truck right in front of my face. Am I gonna die? I’m too young to die. I have so many things I want to do with my life. My life flashes before my eyes and I begin to remember a memory I thought I sealed for all eternity.
I’ve always been a model student. I treated others kindly and respectfully, obtained straight A’s, and was the epitome of good health, but everything changed when the puberty nation attacked. I started to feel uncomfortable in my own skin. My dick started to get hard in the mornings, girls started to look different to me, I became so hungry that I would eat kimbap under the stairs at my school with a friend, and my voice got deeper for about 3 months before it never changed again.
It was 8th grade when it happened. I was already a year into my changes. My thin wiry frame grew in all directions, especially horizontally. Through all the anxiousness I was experiencing, I found solace in being able to admire the goddess of our school. The beauty of her visage was matched only by the unique and alluring sound of her name.
My confidence was at an all-time high. I wanted to tell her my feelings, no I needed to. I asked her to meet me in private in front of the school. It was Valentine's Day. I bought her a box of chocolates that cost me 3 weeks of my allowance, and I was prepared to confess all of my affection for her.
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I thought I was ready to face her, but when I saw her walking towards me, my heart started to pound so fast I thought it might come out of my chest. The image of her will forever be imprinted in my mind until I die. Her complexion was as smooth and unblemished as silk, and her watery hazel eyes drew me in. Her black hair fluttered in the wind as she took calm and steady steps towards me. Her face showed a small smile that made me freeze in awe of its loveliness. She looked as though she was descending from heaven.
I paused, did I really want to ruin the friendly relationship we had? However, I reaffirmed my belief in myself and took my first step forward.
Or at least, I should have…
Instead, my foot got caught on my shoelace and I dropped the box of chocolates. They would have been fine if not for the fact that as I was falling, my body twisted all the way around, and I ended up landing ass first on the box of chocolate truffles. The box burst into a brown goo, covering my ass and the most expensive pair of jeans in a dark brown. I was shocked.
The goddess ran towards me as she yelled out to me.
“Oh my god! Are you okay?”
“I . . . Uh . .” I couldn’t even form a response because of the disbelief I felt. I was gonna cry.
“Oh no! Your clothes are covered in chocolate. Let me help you clean up.”
She was no idiot. There have been many guys who have called her out to confess to her. She definitely knew why I wanted to meet her, made obvious by the box of chocolates I brought and the fact that I asked her to come alone.
Then I realized, I never had a chance. She knew that I was interested in her, but she showed no sign of hesitation to help me get up and wipe my pants. She didn’t see me as someone special. It was only because of her natural niceness that she would give me any attention.
And so I ran. I ran and ran and holy shit I was tired. I didn’t look back, in fact, I couldn’t see at all. Tears were uncontrollably flowing down my face. I collapsed in the desolate parking lot of our school as I heard rain began to pour down.
In her eyes, I was no different than all her other admirers. It was at this moment I realized that you had to distinguish yourself if you wanted to excel, and I would do whatever it takes. I would crush those in the way of my goals, and manipulate those who were useful.
Perhaps this memory came back to me because it has shaped the way I live, think, and breathe. I wonder what happened to her, but I guess I’ll never know.
I look at the truck, it’s like it has slowed down to a stop. Oh wait, it has stopped.
*HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK*
A middle-aged white man angrily shouts “YOU MAY BE AS BIG AS A CAR, BUT U AIN’T ONE! GIT UR ASS OFF THE ROAD YOU FUKIN RETARD!”
I quickly move back to where I was waiting and the truck zooms by. Goddamnit…
The bus is late.