Three alive men, one dead woman and a sulking possum under false accusations found themselves winding through the labyrinthine mess that used to be New York in a van that had also seen better days.
According to the perpetually cheerful holo-satnav, recently promoted from cup holder to dashboard due to meritorious achievements, they were approximately ten minutes out from a place called the Hotel Extravaganza and Crematorium. No one trusted the name, but apparently they were rated 4 stars online, and everyone was desperate enough for clean sheets and a warm shower that no one had disagreed with the destination when TODD had recommended it.
Bobby was driving, Mcgunkin was sitting in the passenger's seat and Gary was signing with Michaela in the back of the van, engaged intensely in gestural conversation and occasionally chuckling. Bobby normally would have tried to find a way to involve himself in their conversation, but he was feeling too tired, and was more content to sit in silence.
Slightly surprisingly for once, despite his quite passive demeanour as of late Mcgunkin, asked him a question. “Master, I can feel my soul repairing itself, but something has been eluding me, what is my actual purpose?”
“Pardon?” said Bobby.
“My purpose in life, last time I asked, you said I was too clean and did your dirty work. But the longer I tried to find the meaning in that purpose, the more I felt like you weren’t saying what you truly wanted. While I’ve come to enjoy some of the tasks, I have really started to doubt some.”
“Huh…” Bobby responded, he had originally been ordering around Mcgunkin because of the bad feelings he had towards Keith, but Mcgunkin and Keith didn’t even feel like the same person anymore, to the point that he kind of felt like he had killed Keith that day he found him in his apartment, after all what was changing someone's very core into something completely different if not death of that person. Therefore it was a bit stupid for him to still have feelings of resentment towards Mcgunkin and make him do unpleasant and sometimes unnecessary chores.
“What sort of purpose did you want Mcgunkin?” he asked curiously.
“Anything that prepares for your global domination, like digging up graves, cooking you an omelette in the morning, killing a man so you can make him into a thrall and driving your car where you need to go.”
“Ah… Right.” said Bobby, realising that he probably had irreparably damaged whichever part of Mcgunkin made him human. He pulled the van over and allowed Mcgunkin to take the driver's seat. “How about you have a go driving then?”
He scooted over to the passenger's seat as Mcgunkin put the Van into first gear and pulled out. As much as they would be digging up many more graves, it was always good to nurture some non destructive tendencies. “Your purpose is to find ways to enjoy yourself that don’t always involve destruction or loss of life.”
Mcgunkin didn’t reply, but Bobby got the sense that some part of him was more satisfied.
All too soon the buildings began to thin as they entered a large area where everything had been demolished, in the centre of the area was a small car park and a large fairly new looking building complex, it was not constructed in the styles that you would find in modern towns and cities, instead resembling more of a fort of old with a central courtyard surrounded by high walls, but with a giant transparent canopy that kept the dripping fluids from the city above out of the whole area, completely clashing with the fort ascetic.
Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.
A large neon sign on one side of the building complex had the words “Black Beetle’s Hotel Extravaganza and Crematorium”
Mcgunkin parked the van neatly in front of the large building and they spent a few minutes dressing Michaela up so that you couldn’t see any part of her boney body. The end result looked like some grandma who had an obsession with scarves, but luckily didn’t stand out too much.
They left Fluff in the van and went up to the entrance. The dark gates of the complex had no open door, only an old intercom with a large red button. Bobby pressed the button and there was a ringing noise until a deep intense voice came from the other end.
“What's the password?”
Bobby blinked and looked round at his group, who seemed equally bewildered. “Errr, I don’t know any password, we want to stay.”
There was some audible movement from the other end of the intercom and a warm motherly voice came out, “Wonderful dearies, so you’re guests then, staying for a few nights or forever?” The woman laughed at her own joke.
“Just one night!” Bobby said.
“Delightful, I’ll buzz you in”
There was a droning noise and some motors kicked into action, causing the gates to swing open. Bobby and his cohort cautiously wandered into the maw of the building, all looking back when the gate immediately closed behind them.
Someone audibly swallowed.
Contrary to his expectations, the atmosphere improved significantly upon entering the building, the courtyard had sun-imitation lighting and there was a grassy green lawn and some nice flower patches. A rustic sign pointed them towards the hotel reception in one of the rooms just off from the central courtyard.
They all went in, seeing a short woman whose voice matched the one on the Intercom when she welcomed them, “You can call me Mrs Bornet, We don't often get visitors in these parts, what brings you all down here?”
Before Bobby had to try and come up with a difficult excuse they were interrupted by a young girl running in. “Mamawhothesepeople” she said, joining all her words together into an almost incomprehensible mess.
“Just some guests, little May, I’m sure if you ask nicely they will play with you.”
The little girl turned to face the group, “Playwithme” she demanded, like a conqueror giving orders to their subjects.
“No, Maybel, that is not how you address guests, give it another go.” Mrs Bornet told the small girl sternly.
The girl scrunched up her face and asked again “Playwithme, Pleasesandthankyoos”
Bobby laughed at the antics of the little girl, “Tomorrow definitely, I think we are all too tired tonight.”
Mrs Bornet nodded “Yes, and it’s time for your bedtime too, young girl, I’ll read you a chapter of the Great Adventures of Snorkin if you go now.”
The young girl shot off before she could be asked again, chanting “snorkinsnorkinsnorkin” under her breath.
Then her mother turned to the guests, “I assume you want two rooms, one for the old lady and one for the rest of you?”
Bobby nodded, it would probably be better to give Michaela some privacy.
Mrs Bornet led them to some small but cosy rooms, then came back a bit later with towels and fresh sheets. Bobby barely had time to fold up his suit before he knocked himself out on the pillow.
Necromancing was hard work.
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