“First steps into a foreign land and I’m already being threatened!” CC laughed. She threw her hands up as if surrendering. “Please don’t hurt me, officer, I come in peace! But, everyone here is so violent, aren’t they? Sending expeditions into my land, mucking up the place, lowering the property value, and then scooting back home after explosive losses. I love it. Every single time, it’s nothing but a new experience to me. Do you get it?”
I watched the possessed woman while she spoke with narrowed eyes, though I didn’t move. Now that I had drawn my weapon, something in the back of my mind was telling me that attacking her would be a bad idea. Such a feeling hadn’t happened in a long while, but I tended to trust that instinct when it showed up. Even though I didn’t deactivate my sword, I no longer brandished it in her direction.
“What’s going on?” I demanded.
“What do you think, little guy?” she asked, shrugging while keeping her hands up. I held my tongue. “I decided to pop by for a nice cuppa, try some local cuisine, maybe visit an amusement park or three. Do you know how many times I’ve walked around Delphara? And I mean that literally, like taking a physical form and hiking around the entire continent. No need to guess, it’s 3,257. Do you know what being pent up like that does to a girl? Makes her go coo coo bananas, that’s what.”
“I can imagine,” I said dryly. My eyes kept looking towards the door, expecting the others to burst in at any second, but no one came. There wasn’t any way for them to get in contact with me otherwise; I specifically left my Sending Stone in a box at home so I wouldn’t have to worry about it. Holding back a sigh, I gestured with my free hand. “Would you like to sit?”
“Oh, sir, may I?” CC asked, clasping her hands in front of her. “May I please have the pleasure of sitting in the company of… Actually, who are you?”
“I am B-“
“Shut up, no, I wasn’t actually asking you,” she interrupted. Moving her hands so that she made a rectangle with her thumbs and index fingers. Gazing at me from between them, she pulled them apart. I arched my eyebrow in confusion as her eyes moved back and forth. “Dungeon Inspector Badger! The Dungeon Inspector! Wow, little bro really didn’t put a lot of thought into that one, did he?”
My eyes narrowed. “How much of what happened in the blizzard do you know?“
CC ignored my question. “Wait, how did you manage that?” she asked, bemused.
I pursed my lips and thought about staying silent, but I could practically hear my boss yelling at me to engage CC. This time, I didn’t hold back my sigh. “How did I manage what?”
The possessed woman pointed at a spot in front of her. “You had Himia delete your name from her notes!” she accused. “Real name is blank, and only Badger is on here. We both know that's not a real name. How did you convince her to withhold information?”
“I assure you that I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I said, trying to keep my voice even. Himia had broken several privacy laws when she had brought us into Razorbeak’s wagon dungeon, and now this Dungeonborn was doing it brazenly in front of me? That fact that the Dungeon Master's secretary also apparently left notes was not lost on me, either. “I would also like to inform you that magically prying into people’s information is a very serious crime here. I'd have Himia locked up, too, given half the chance.”
“But it’s so fuuuuun,” CC whined. She moved her head in a way that made me think she was peeking over something before rolling her eyes and waving her hand in front of her. “Fiiiiine, I won’t look through your stuff this time. It is your house, I suppose; I should play by your stupid rules. It was probably Himia’s fault, anyway. She’s dumb but smart at the same time. You know?”
“We’ve met,” I said bluntly. With my hand still on it, I set the hilt of my sword on the table so that the burning blade was safely off of it. While the furniture was metal, I didn’t want to get in trouble for leaving burn marks. “I think we’ve gone in a weird direction. Why don’t you start with why you’re here, CC.”
“Great Grand Mistress CC, the Magnificent,” she said.
“I’m not calling you that,” I immediately replied.
“Yeah, that’s fair.” The possessed woman shrugged. I was surprised to see how easy she gave up, but didn’t dare to hope that she would be so agreeable in the future. “You said I could sit, right? I’d like to sit. I’m going to sit.”
“Go ahead.”
CC sat down. A beat passed as she seemed to get used to the sensation, and she grinned. “Damn, my girl Carmala got a lot of junk in the trunk for one of those skinny tree huggers,” she announced. “Like, from a distance I knew she was nice but it’s pleasantly different feeling it for real. I could get used to this. You get me?”
“Carimella,” I corrected on reflex. Scowling, I ignored her question and tried to get back on track. “And what are you doing here?”
“Yeah, you’re right, Elves aren’t where it’s at,” she continued. Raising her hands, she brought her fist down into an open palm. “Dragons, though! Dad used to love dragons. Not when big and lizardy, though, but like the trimmed down and humanoid versions. I won’t have anyone calling him a scaly. He was about a lot of things but a non-feminine form wasn’t one of them.”
I scowled. I didn’t need to hear any of this.“That’s-“
The Dungeonborn cut me off. “Heard little bro’s bagged one. Real sassy bitch, too. Kinda jealous, if I can be real. You know, I should get me a dragon. Wait, no… I should seduce and steal his dragon! That would-“
“CC!” I yelled.
The possessed woman looked down at me as if remembering I was there. “Yeah? What’s up?”
“Why. Are. You. Here?” I repeated through grit teeth.
If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.
“Why wouldn’t I be here?” CC scoffed, crossing her arms under her chest. She seemed to get distracted by Carimella’s body again before I rapped my knuckles on the table. “Right, don’t let some nice squishy bits get your brain in a tizzy, CC, and answer the officer’s questions.”
“Not an officer, a Dungeon Inspector,” I said.
“That’s even better!” she exclaimed. “Because, as a Dungeonborn, and I’m assuming you know what that is, I’m all about dungeons. Big ones, small ones, deadly ones, ones where the minions all wear silly hats. All kinds! I could ramble on and on about them for literal days if you’ll let me.”
“I will not,” I scoffed. “Are you going to actually answer the question, or are you going to waste both of our time?”
“Is that what you think I’m doing? I don’t think I’m wasting time, I think this conversation is very valuable,” she scoffed back before offering me an infuriatingly easy smile. “You haven’t said nearly as much as I did, but I just figured you’re shy or something. It’s okay, things can be hard when you’re in the presence of greatness. I understand!”
Just like Carimella had, CC leaned forward with her elbow on the table and her chin on her palm. Her eyes stayed locked with mine, and a thought occurred to me. “Are you biding time until you get used to this body?” I asked.
“Aw, damn, you figured me out!” she exclaimed, raising her hand and snapping her fingers. “Yeah, you got me. I’m bonding with this body on every level. Hopefully, it’ll stick because, who boy, things will be messy if it doesn’t.”
My grip tightened on my sword. “And what happens when the process is done?”
“I’m here after that, aren’t I?” CC asked, her smile morphing into a grin. “Well and truly here on your continent. No more hopscotch through the deep dungeons, I’ll just be here.”
“So Dungeonborns can get to the point where they don’t need to be in a dungeon to survive?” I asked. A part of me wanted to strike, but that feeling in the back of my head stopped me.
“What makes you think I’m not in a dungeon right now, you silly little guy?” she returned.
“The Dungeon Master-“
“Ugh, such a pretentious name,” CC complained.
“… On that, we agree.”
“Though, dad gave it to him, so I suppose I shouldn’t say too much,” she continued, waving her hand.
“Your little brother,” I started, hoping to avoid more interruptions. “Gave me the ability to see auras when in a dungeon. I don’t assume it would work with you because it didn’t with him, but if we were inside one then I would have certainly seen it with Carimella.”
“Oh yeah, that is a fair point,” CC said, reaching up to tap her lips with her finger. “Do you really want to know what dungeon I’m in?”
“That feels like a trick question, but yes,” I hesitantly answered.
With a grin, CC stood and started unfastening Carimella’s robes. “Really, it was a stroke of genius on my part.”
“I really don’t want this to continue,” I said quickly. A part of me wanted to avert my gaze, but another part didn't trust her to not try something when I wasn't looking.
“Nah, you’re in for a real treat, trust me,” she countered. “Not just because of this rockin' bod, either. I’m serious, this was really a brilliant idea.”
“I don’t trust you, and I’d rather you stay clothed at all times. Especially when you’re in someone else’s body. So, stop that,” I warned, tapping the table with my sword’s hilt.
“You northerners are so reserved,” CC giggled, completely disregarding my words. “You don’t have to worry about anything like Mella’s modesty. Really, it’s a-okay. She doesn’t have any decency any more; I’ve completely assimilated her personality. Her consciousness is gone.”
At first I was confused, but as understanding dawned on me, my blood ran cold. Carimella died because of this possession? My words weren’t nearly as elegant as my thoughts. “You killed her?” I sputtered.
CC paused, face tilted upwards as if in thought. “Huh. Yeah, I suppose when you really boil it down, I did,” she admitted, shrugging. “Technically, I think it was closer to suicide. She offered her mind, body, and soul to me, after all. Hers is a near perfect vessel, after all. So while I'm really happy she agreed, it's not my fault she drank the Kool-Aid.”
“No, this is your fault. You’re the one who’s starting your own cult!” I yelled, outraged.
“Yes, cults are who the Kool-Aid is for, obviously,” she sighed. Her fingers continued to fumble with her robe. “Man, new fingers suck, am I right?”
“How can you stand there and-“
“Got it!” CC yelled excitedly. She shifted and shed the robe off. It fell to the ground, leaving Carimella’s body, thankfully, still in her small clothes. Even with the lack of decency, I couldn’t tear my eyes away. There was a reason why the Elf had limped and winced in pain before the possession, and it was horrible.
Almost every inch of her body that had been hidden by the robe were covered in fresh scars. It wasn't random, but done in careful, intricate patterns.
“Yes, stare at my marvelous form,” the Dungeonborn boasted proudly, raising her arms. Dumbfounded, I stood up and walked around the table, fully aware that my grip on my sword was white knuckle tight. “Look, but don’t touch. Actually, feel free to touch. New body, new rules. Sometimes you gotta shake things up.”
I barely heard her words as I took her in. Magic circles overlapped with each other in one of the most convoluted patterns I had ever seen before. It was almost pure nonsense, but the more I saw, the more the chaos made sense to me. I wanted to reach out to trace the circles on her skin, but managed to keep my faculties long enough to know that was a horrible idea even with the invitation.
CC stood there, hands on her hips as she proudly displayed her new body, and things started clicking into place for me. The runes weren’t the same as ours, but I could tell that, linguistically, they had a common ancestor. Some of the pathways of power were not new to me, either. Tracing them with my eyes, I felt something pinch the back of my neck just as something clicked in my head.
“You turned Carimella Rose into a dungeon,” I half accused, half whispered in awe.
She started clapping her hands. “Ding ding ding, we have a winner!” the Dungeonborn yelled. “As you can see, I am, in fact, in a dungeon! Or, well, a facsimile of one. Little Melia was just so perfect for the job, and so eager to help to boot! Good enough for the purpose of coming here, talking to you, all while making a real one.”
“A real…” My voice trailed off as I furrowed my brow in thought.
Even though Carimella could obviously have tracked down any of the four of us, she came here. If it was just to talk, then that could have happened anywhere. Instead, she gave herself up to the Department of Dungeons directly. That had bothered me before, and I mentally swore at everyone around, myself included, that none of us figured it out.
This was where every important piece of knowledge about the workings of the Central Continent’s dungeons was gathered in one place. Locations, maps, enemy compositions, everything diligently filed in an easy to understand format. By building a single dungeon, CC would have more than enough information to sweep across the land and do the same thing the Dungeon Master said she did to the Southern Continent.
Making a conscious decision to ignore that dangerous feeling in the back of my head, I finally swung my sword.