(Authors Notes)
WARNING:
The following contains a not well flesh out emotional conversation that many of you may not like and a possibly controversial topic.
Viewer Discretion is advised
I'm sorry if some of you guys are offended by this chapter or feel this is too forced, but it's necessary to establish the protagonist's character.
I don't want to give you guys the bland and typical protagonist with a soul as plentiful as our future fuel reserves.
It just that I'm a total amateur at convening emotions.
The first chapter showed, in my opinion how calm he was, the second showed he didn't back talk from no one, and this ones is a look at how the protagonist is within.
If you guys don't like this chapter, just skip it, I won't get angry at you. I'll be here for you.
I will write you guys tomorrow another chapter. One that won't be like this.
(End of Author Notes)
Before anything else was said I lost conscious and now reawaken in this darkness.
So...
What now?
Do I just wait? Am I being still an ugly fetus embryo, when can I be a post-fetus? How long will it take for me to be born? Will I have to wait through all of this?
Normally I suppose anyone going through my situation would do some meditation or some other nonsense, but I neither now how to nor do I think I could feasibly do. It could also stunt my growth, maybe even cause me to be born prematurely. I don't dare to take that risk.
Guess I'll just let myself go to sleep.
Goodbye.
*Months later*
I have finally reawaken.
For now I will try to move my limbs or something, I expect that to help me calculate how old I am. Although I doubt that I would now very well.
Lets see.
I try to touch myself, as I do I can sort of sense the movements. Followed up by me trying to see if I can kick, maybe even get a sense of my current strength. As I do all of this I come to the realization that I may or may not be born in a couple of months from now. However what would I know about child birth. I'm no doctor, and as far as my first birth's recollection goes, it never happened.
So until I'm born this is my life now. It's not as bad as I though it would be. I simply have to wait it out.
...
I feel very bored and a bit lonely
When can I leave?
....
I wonder...
Show Status
Buddy your you haven't even been born yet and you already trying to train or something.
Not really my friend, I'm simply curious if this is one of those worlds the youngsters often read about. Don't worry about showing me my status, I just wanted to know if you were there.
Well I am here, thanks for asking.
....
???
Youngsters? What do you mean by that?
You know, those prepubescent, some teen, or the rare young adults who go through this process.
...
How old are you?
My my, to just ask something like that. It's okay I'll tell you anyways, I was 97 years old before I died.
Hmm.... Might you also happen to not be an easterner either?
It is as you imply, I am a westerner and not one of those Asian kids.
That isn't really a good way to say it, people could be offended.
Isn't that what they are?
For example:
America is both the name of the northern American continent and the southern American continent, not to mention the name of that other half of the world and part of the name of a country. They seem proud to be called after their continent. Europe is also the name of a continent and those people inhabiting it don't mind being called Europeans. The Australians also called themselves after their own small continent. Antarctica doesn't really have a considerable population, so lets ignore it. Lastly Africa although they rather you didn't refer them as such they still don't give you too much of a fuss about it.
So let me ask you why would the Asians be offended, while every other continent dwellers don't care about it at worst. Is it that they are ashamed of their continent, or is it that they hate each other?
Huh? Answer. Why would that be offensive?
...
Listen... it's just a complicated matter okay. So people are really uptight about everything and are easily angered.
Anger. That's such an illogical emotion, why do people let themselves be taken over by it?
You. You are different okay, I don't know if it's because you are from a different time or are just naturally like this.
Look. I don't hate them or any one else you might hear me complain about. It's just that I detest it when people victimize themselves to either gain pity or the right to later attack other people.
I'm just repugnated by it. I came from a hard time myself, but my people never allowed itself to be taken advantage of it self. Yet it never really tried to victimize itself or other people.
Your ideology isn't a bad one but it's just bound to bring you trouble, especially in this world.
Well, going back on our conversation, do you mean easterners are the most common people doing this? If so, why are they the ones who do this the most?
I.. I do-don't know if I should answer that, it might get me in trouble later on.
I won't tell anyone else, I'll take the blame if it's necessary.
...
Well. When it come to kidnapping them from their dimensions a countries leader often specifies on the ritual, portal , or summoning to bring an easily manipulable person. Often they can also specify around how strong they are, the stronger they are the harder they are to kidnap.
...
... Keep going.
*sigh* This will sound wrong too, their souls are more modifiable. By that I mean it's easy to work with them as they aren't too.... Well... Er ..
Just say it, I won't get angry. I'm here with you.
I-It's that they are generally too basic, they aren't as complex as other species, as evolutionarily speaking they never really did much. They just stayed trapped on their continent as they couldn't really travel anywhere else safely.
There is more you are not telling me.
I know, but I already said too much. Only way I could get myself in more trouble is if I mentioned the mental problems of most people brought here.
... Wait?
W-What? I.. I didn't say anything.
So... You mean too say these so called "heroes" are actually psychopaths?
N-no no. NO. I didn't say that!
But you suggest the IT.
I-Im not trying to say that.
Yet you did.
SO, are you saying that psychopaths, who are surprisingly normal believe it or not, but with streaks of impulsiveness and often fearlessness behaviors, with a cold lack of empathy are actually heroes?
NO. Don't Misinterpret. I never said anything of the sort.
That may be so, but thinking about it makes me wonder. Is it true? Are heroes just over-glorified psychopaths?
Listen to me. I don't know where you are getting at, but I didn't say anything of the sort.
If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.
Okay.
Let's do some role-playing.
WHAT?!
Imagine you're walking down the street, when suddenly you see a house being engulfed in flames. A child leans out of a second-story window, screaming for someone -- anyone -- to help.
Do you A) wrestle with your own fear of death, desperately grasping for some way to help without endangering your own life, before heroically whipping out your cell phone to dial 911, or B) charge straight into the blazing inferno without so much as a second thought for your own personal safety?
If you answered B, congratulations, you hero! And also a psychopath!
Hmm... Neither? I'm just a blue screen. What could I possibly do?
Don't Ever belittle yourself like that. You are that and more. Anything is possible no matter how hard it may seem, and even if you can't always succeed you should at least try. Because you are bound to always fail if you never take a shot at it.
So listen here friend, don't be so pessimistic. Believe in yourself.
If you don't who will?
...
What DO you know?
DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO BE EVERYWHERE BUT BE INCAPABLE OF DOING ANYTHING. I'VE SEEN TO MANY GOOD PEOPLE DIE AND WAS FORCED TO WATCH FROM BOTH SIDES, THE KILLER AND THE MURDERED. WHAT DO YOU EVEN KNOW? YOU LEGS CAN TAKE YOU ANYWHERE, YOUR ARMS CAN MOVE THE WORLD FOR YOU.
I DIDN'T ASK FOR THIS.
IM NOTHING BUT A PEEKING STALKER, ALWAYS A SHADOW TO EVERYONE ELSE.
What would YOU even know about me?
...
I know what it feels to be helpless.
I spent a whole decade in a coma, but I could hear as everyone around me fell apart. I wanted to do something, Anything, however fate is a cruel man.
I always believed that if you tried hard enough everything was possible and when failure came I would be fine. I lived a life full of failure and misfortune, I didn't expect to get far to begin with.
...
But then one day, things changed, I had saved enough money to maybe change my life. So I look for places to invest it, to perhaps give myself and others a better chance.
I looked and looked for possibilities, I talked to a lot of people, both in person and through a phone. It seemed the market wasn't as I though it used to be. Times had changed, so I couldn't be sure I would do the right choice. Tired and hungry I choose to stop at a small chain restaurant, I know I normally wouldn't but I didn't have the energy to go cook at home.
So I ordered my food, I sat alone and just slowly ate. I thought and thought on what should I do. I finally had enough money to abandon my past and get a better life. But I was so scared to fail, what if I lost everything?
I eventually got the attention of the manager, he came up to me asked me what was wrong. I told I didn't want to be an inconvenience to such a hard working young man. He told me it was fine, as long as nothing too important happened he wouldn't mind.
So I told him my story, I got so caught up I ended up telling him everything about myself. Although I don't remember well what went on afterwards, I can still see his concerned face. Even so I spend hours taking to him, it was almost closing time and we where still talking.
He told me to invest while I still could, not necessarily with a big company or a large sum of money, maybe a small one. I just had to look for something most people either needed or where willing to pay for. My first thought was immediately food, I laughed at myself and how weak I was to self suggestion.
He asked what was so funny, caught up in this man's kindness I told him at my first thought. Told me why not try it with their business, it may be small and humble but its full of hard-working people.
I wasn't sure what to do, but alas I gave it a shot.
....
...
What happened next?
Well... months passed everything seemed to be going well, but then a fire breaks out. Most people working at the kitchen inhaled to much monoxide and died, there was a gas leak and later everything was just an inferno.
I wasn't there myself that day, I had taken a day off, but when I turned on the TV that afternoon...
The news made their way too me. I was immediately overwhelmed, what happened? Was it me and my bad luck? That business was doing so well.
I spent the rest of the night tortured by my own guilt and sadness. I wish I was there, maybe I could at least helped.
But then the next day the news got worse, that young man was caught under burning debris. He would never walk again, his lungs were starting to fail, and he could barely move his charred arms.
...
I was so close to finally taking control over my life, to finally escaped this wretched fate. He gave me hope when I was doubtful of myself, and now he had lost everything.
...
I never gave up on that man, I would visit him when I could, try to help him cover his bills as he didn't have family that could help him.
One day...
He just died, that's it. End of Story.
I never got a Resolution. Even to this day I still feel helpless.
...
*sigh*
It's not my intention to give you this pitiful excuse for a sad story, I just wanted to tell you that you aren't alone.
I... I don't know what you been through, but neither do you know what I been through.
I-Im sor-
Don't be, we both are.
You know things I don't know and I know things you don't know.
I'm here for you.
And if it's okay with you, I would like you to be here for me.
I know I shouldn't ask your for a special treatment or anything, and neither should I ask you to involve yourself with me. One day you may be forced to watch me die, and being friends with me will make things worse.
Bu-but I'm... I'm Scared.
Scared of being alone...
Is th-that so?
I wanted a second life, not because I was unhappy of my first life or because I believed that I had still many things to do.
I just fear what lies beyond death...
The Nothingness.
SO.. Let calm down for now.
Alright.
This may sound weird to you, but can we talk a little more? I know your busy with work and all but...
I just want someone to talk to.
...
Okay, lets talk for a bit more.
Aha Ha. Thank you my friend, that is just what I needed to hear.
Now... Lets get back to topic
Hmm?
As I was saying about psychopaths and heroes being one in the same...
Ohh... NOT this again!
YES! This again, lets leave no leaves unturned.
Why?... *slowly breathing in* Well, the god of fate did say you where a person that was hard to deal with.
Nonsense, let us discuss this more.
... Okay, but we have to be more private about this from now on.
Alright lets talk.
...
....
.....
(Authors Notes)
Also if you guys find any spelling mistakes please inform me so I can later fix them, good grammar is always important, and I don't want to make this story seem less appealing because of bad grammar.
Either way thank you for reading.
Till tomorrow.
(End of Author Notes)