The warm summer air brushed gently against his skin and he almost let out a relaxing sigh. In the distance, he could see the largest of the trees gently swaying in time with the wind.
It was a beautiful and peaceful day...
So why the hell did he feel so agitated?
10 year old Rosan sat on the edge of the White Rose as he watched his destination, a summer island, get closer and closer. The summer island, for all intents and purposes, looked like the ideal vacation spot yet, Rosan didn't feel like he was going on one. His lips were pursed in discomfort as the island neared.
Maybe this was a bad idea —
He felt a warm hand clutch his own and he was sent a reassuring squeeze. Craning his head slightly, red and purple met electric blue. The redhead flashed a small smile and allowed himself to relax a little.
"So this is Baterilla, the island where you were raised?"
12 year old Meiko looked at the island with a hint of awe mixed with trepidation. On one hand this was Rosan's former home… on the other hand, this was Rosan's former home and the bad memories seemed to outweigh the good tremendously.
Meiko knew why Rosan was hesitant to come here but he really needed this. She just hoped that the boy got some form of closure by coming here.
After what he had told her… well how could she not insist he come here? It had been 6 years since he had last been on this island!
Remembering the conversation they had months ago left the blonde thinking. She blushed scarlet as she remembered the entire scope of the conversation they had 5 months ago.
----------------------------------------
1 month after the events of Fregate
A 9 year old Rosan sat cross legged, in the clearing of his mindscape, idly observing Meiko and Mod-chan laughing about who knows what.
He was currently practicing the speed of activating Save Point so he allowed himself to get lost in his thoughts. He had been practicing this technique for a while now, so his body knew the motions without him having to put much thought into it.
Later, he would try and see if he could increase the limit.
Rosan stared longer then he would have liked at Meiko's elated expression and felt his face heat up. The child looked away before they noticed him staring and let out a grunt as he lost focus of his technique.
He had poured too much power into it.
That couldn't be goo —
The resulting boom made a deep scowl form on his face.
Look at him… messing up techniques because of his silly little crush. This wasn't like him at all and he felt embarrassed that of all things, his feelings for Meiko would throw him so off balance.
He was alerted to their presence by the sound of rapidly approaching footsteps. Glancing at Mod-chan and Meiko, Rosan swiftly wiped away his scowl and regarded them both with a neutral expression.
"Rosan, what was that loud noise? Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere? Should I get the medical supplies?"
Meiko's doting used to annoy him but now, it caused Rosan to flush in appreciation. He liked being the sole focus of her attention more then he liked to admit.
"That won't be necessary Meiko, this is my mindscape," he replied and her mouth formed an O in realization. She looked adorable with her face set like that but then again she looked adorable any —
Goddammit.
Rosan wanted to slam his head into a wall until something broke at the thoughts invading him.
How did this even happen? Rosan prided himself in knowing about himself but his feelings for Meiko came completely out of left field.
The redhead blamed it on his suppressed emotions so really, it was his fault. His feelings for her had most likely been slowly building up the more time he spent with her but he had never payed attention to it. It made sense, the blonde was the only one who showed him positive attention on Daybreak, his crush had probably unknowingly developed there...
Seeing Meiko in that dress, so pleased with him, wearing something that he bought her, made all his latent feelings burst forth like a veritable freight train.
His emotions for her had steadily been building up but it was blocked by a wall and cnce the wall crumbled, all of it slammed into him and caught him completely off guard, which reduced him to his current, pathetic, state.
Now, the Mod Mod no Mi user was scrambling to get a grasp of himself and making terrible progress. At least he had stopped stuttering just by being near her. It didn't help that even before suppressing his emotions, Rosan had never quite felt something like this before.
Goddammit.
Rosan cleared his throat and said "I'm fine Meiko, really. I just... put a bit too much power in my technique is all."
She nodded at his explanation and instead of going back to where she was sitting, she plopped herself right next to the younger boy.
Rosan resisted the urge to put his head in his hands. This idiot didn't seem to understand the effect she was having on him.
Mod smiled knowingly and Rosan nearly scowled at her.
The damn traitor was having too much fun watching Rosan struggle like a newborn to get a grasp of this feeling. When Rosan had tried to modify his feelings to make them go away, Mod-chan had denied it.
He didn't even know she could do that!
The woman had told him to stop being a coward and to deal with his feelings head on. He reluctantly agreed with her and instead of forcefully using Modification, he had stopped attempting to do it.
Instead, he had tried to get advice from the woman on what to do but she simply shrugged, just as lost as him. He frowned as he recalled their conversation.
"Everything you feel for the first time Rosan, I'm likely feeling too," she said helpfully and Rosan huffed in response.
"Thanks Mod-chan! That's exactly the answer I was looking for from an ancient Devil Fruit with, who knows how many, years of memory," he replied sarcastically.
"Well sorry I couldn't be of more assistance Mr. I'm in love but don't wanna tell her," she bit back and the redhead scowled at her.
He was not in love.
"You and I both know telling her is not an option Mod-chan."
"Why not Rosan?" the purple haired woman had dropped all playful tense, as she stared seriously at the shorter boy.
Rosan sighed. He already knew where this conversation was headed.
"Meiko is a good person, Mod-chan," he began, exhaling fondly as he thought about her. "She's better off finding someone that's actually good for her, instead of a person like me. I'm just hoping that her crush eventually wears off so she can find that right person."
Mod shook her head in annoyance. Her charge still thought it was just a harmless crush. "Don't be such an idiot," she thought to herself "You can't just expect someone to stop loving you after some time." She wanted to rip her hair at his stubbornness but instead let out a deep sigh.
"Rosan why don't you want yourself to be happy?" Mod asked sadly and Rosan blinked in surprise.
"I'm not trying to stop myself from being —."
"Yes you are Rosan," Mod cut him off. She was glaring at him now and Rosan went quiet.
"You always talk as if you don't deserve to be. First, you refuse to forgive yourself because you had no choice but to leave Ace behind and now, you clearly have feelings for this girl and you're saying you don't deserve her! You keep torturing yourself Rosan and it's hurting everyone who cares about you!" She shouted.
Rosan was shocked silent. The sheer frustration in her tone was enough to keep him rooted to his spot. The boy had a stunned expression on his face from actually being yelled at by her.
"I just don't get it, Rosan! You're normally such a selfish boy, yet lately, it seems you never want to do anything that benefits you unless it's getting stronger!"
"Rosan, for everyone's sake… Meiko, Ace, Rouge, me, please stop being so stubborn and harsh on yourself! I know you want to be the strongest to keep us safe, but this is not the way. You have to enjoy your life as well," Mod finished and Rosan felt his heart twist as he saw the tears brimming in her eyes.
Mod panted as she finished berating the child. A part of her felt bad, but a larger part felt nothing but satisfaction.
She didn't like going against Rosan often but she had to admit, seeing the utter surprise on his face as she tore into him was more gratifying then she thought.
Everything the Devil Fruit did, she did for his sake so it balanced out how horrible she felt for shouting at him.
The deep contemplation on his face, gave her pause. The boy looked as if he never realized his unhealthy habit and he was just now evaluating them.
Did he… did Rosan not realize how self destructive his thinking process was? Did all Mod have to do was point out his issues…? Was the boy really that unaware?!
Her look of satisfaction turned into one of disbelief.
Right... he was only 9.
Meanwhile, Rosan was deep in thought as he digested the words of his Devil Fruit. Her words and emotions resonated deeply inside his core, as he contemplated the validity of her statements.
Was he really being so hard on himself…?
The redhead thought back to both the situations Mod-chan had mentioned and tried to view them in another perspective.
He had made the choice to leave Ace behind of his own volition… right? The more Rosan thought about it the more he realized it was either leave Ace behind, or go with Garp.
Being taken somewhere by the Marines when Rosan had the Devil Fruit he did… that was just not an option. Rosan stood no chance against the marine so taking Ace from him was also ruled out.
Rosan… he really couldn't have taken Ace with him could he? He had no option but to leave him in the old man's care. He didn't have a choice.
But that made him a coward.
He — no. Rosan had said he would view it in another perspective and he had already come to the conclusion that he couldn't have taken Ace. The only options he had were to go with the marine… or leave Ace behind. The choice was obvious
The Mod Mod no mi user forced himself to think about his second situation.
Rosan was not a liar, much less to himself. He was an honest person at heart and he only lied if he had no other option. That's why he could say with confidence that he had a massive crush on Meiko. He knew the girl had a light crush on him so why didn't he want to pursue it?
Because he was a monster and monsters couldn't do what normal people did.
Rosan had taken everything from Meiko. Her parents died by his hand. Her island reduced to nothing because of him. Just the fact that she didn't hate him spoke miles about her character.
If anyone on the planet was justified in their hatred for him, it was her.
What gave him the right to have feelings for her? Rosan didn't pursue her because Rosan didn't deserve her. He was a cold blooded monster and Meiko was the sun. He was tainted and she was pure.
"Rosan…," the snarl snapped him out of his musings and Rosan was surprised to see rage in Mod's crimson eyes. She picked him up by the collar of his shirt and his dual eyes narrowed into slits. The two eyed each other and the tension rising was obvious.
"I'm sick and tired of how you view yourself," Mod-chan growled at him and Rosan had to force himself to calm down, lest he lash out.
"Mod-chan, I love you, but get your hands off of me," Rosan said in a dangerously low tone but Mod refused to back down. His long time partner was showing that she could be just as stubborn as him when she wanted to be.
The redhead would have applauded her if he wasn't close to assaulting her for the grip she had on him. Only the knowledge that she was doing this for his sake, kept him from attacking her right then and there.
Not even Mod-chan could get away with treating him like this.
"Just listen to me Rosan," she said and the boy let out an aggravated sigh that Mod reciprocated in equal capacity.
They stared at each other in a tense silence before Rosan tersely nodded his head at her, tiny pupils still set into slits but fangs no longer bared. Mod-chan let out a relieved sigh and took this as her sign to go.
She did not disappoint.
"Rosan, you are the most amazing little boy I've ever met! Your empathy, your consideration, how you always try to make sure those you care for are happy, you are so incredible and you don't even seem to realize it! Y-you are the first person to ever accept me as more then a Devil Fruit and because of you I… I-I feel like a person."
Mod began choking up and Rosan felt all of his anger wash away at the sight.
"Everything you do… you do it with my best interests in mind Rosan," Mod whispered and her grip on him loosened.
"You left your brother behind because of me for Kami's sake! Never in my years has anyone cared for me on the scale that you do. You'll do anything to make sure I'm happy but you just don't get it Rosan! I can't be happy unless you're happy because you are my life!" she exclaimed, tears finally falling and the purple haired woman looked at the boy in nothing but despair.
Rosan looked at the woman pouring her heart out in wonder.
He did not know much of anything about her past and truthfully, he didn't care. Her past was her past and what mattered was that she was with him now. She had alluded to having previous wielders and being a weapon for the marines but Rosan had never pried deeper. It was not a topic she liked talking about, so he never pressured her to talk about it.
What he did know was that before they had met, Mod-chan had no emotions, had little to no social interactions and she didn't even have a gender nor appearance!
Yet here she was; crying, laughing, teasing, with such a beautiful face and she was just so alive because he had extended an arm of friendship to the Devil Fruit.
Mod-chan was able to feel these things because of him and that made his eyes soften. The two of them trusted each other more then anything in the world and so Rosan knew she truly meant everything she said.
If Mod-chan could say this with such confidence… maybe he did need to take a better look at himself.
If Mod-chan believed with her heart that he wasn't what he thought he was… maybe he could try for her.
Maybe he was being a bit too hard on himself. If that really were the case...
"Mod-chan I'm going to tell Meiko everything and make my decision based on what she says," Rosan informed her and he softly clutched her in reassurance.
He still had his doubts so… he'd see what Meiko thought. He would kill two birds with one stone by telling Meiko about Baterilla and his feelings for her.
If what Mod-chan was saying was true… who better to tell him then the one whose life he ruined?
Mod felt nothing but relief as she heard Rosan's intentions. The Devil Fruit sagged onto the floor, with Rosan in tow, and let out a breath she hadn't known she'd been holding.
She looked at Rosan with unwavering confidence in her crimson eyes. Mod fully believed in Meiko's abilities and knew there was nothing to worry about if Rosan was relying on her to disappoint him.
He fully thought the blonde was going to reinforce the idea that he was a monster but Mod knew better.
Meiko would show Rosan how stupid he was being.
Rosan saw said confidence and for the first time in a long time, he doubted himself. What would cause Mod-chan to be so confident. The woman had unwavering faith in what Meiko was going to say and it confused him.
Did she know something he didn't? Surely Meiko's answer wasn't set in stone…
Suddenly, Rosan wasn't so confident that he was going to hear what he thought he was.
----------------------------------------
He looked directly into Meiko's eyes as his memory ended and the girl flushed, looking away. Rosan sighed at how cute she was.
He felt his resolve waver a bit. God he really was a coward — no this is exactly what Mod-chan had been talking about. Until Meiko told him her thoughts, Rosan would refrain from degrading himself.
"Meiko, I have something to tell you," Rosan said in a serious tone.
Mod widened her eyes and Meiko shot him a concerned look at the graveness in his tone.
"What's the matter Rosan?" Meiko asked and the fact she sounded so worried for him, made his heart flutter.
Kami, he had it bad.
Rosan decided he would tell her everything now before he got cold feet.
"The Marines killed my mother when I was 4 years old," Rosan told her bluntly and Meiko's eyes widened in horror at the rather abrupt influx of information.
What had he just said?!
"W-what?" She stammered in confusion and the redhead hesitantly continued.
Rosan told her everything that transpired on Baterilla. How his name was Portgas D. Rosan, how his mother had found him when he was a newborn and raised him like her actual son, how she was married to the pirate king Gol D. Roger (that had gotten a pale, wide eyed look from the girl), how she had been pregnant with his little brother Ace, how she was forced to withhold giving birth for nearly 20 months due to being the child of the pirate king, how he ate the Mod Mod no mi met Mod-chan and the target that was put on his back in doing so, how his mother had died giving birth to Ace, how… how he had seen her die.
Meiko had to excuse herself after she heard that specific detail. The 9 year old was sure he heard retching and it spoke volumes about her character that just hearing his experience would cause her to react like this.
Rosan told her how, at just 4 years old, he had made the hard decision to leave his brother behind in the care of the Marine who had witnessed his birth. How he had been sailing the seas for most of his life in the pursuit of getting strong enough to keep Mod-chan and himself safe. How he had traveled with Nico Robin for 4 years… and how he eventually ended up in Doc's grasp after a trap was laid for him. Rosan tried to avoid omitting any details and honestly, it felt liberating, talking to someone else about it.
He had not shed a single tear as he regaled the blonde and the redhead began to idly wonder when the last time he cried was?
Probably when he realized Robin wasn't coming to save him. That had been his breaking point after all. After that moment, Rosan had not shed a single tear again.
Good.
Meiko on the other hand, was an absolute mess. The blonde girl had tear streaks running down her cheeks and she let out choked sobs as Rosan told his life story. More then once, he had to pause his tale due to the 11 year old excusing herself and the 9 year old heard a keening wail every single time she walked out of sight. Every time she walked off, Mod-chan followed after her, presumably to soothe her, and Rosan sat there to keep himself composed.
It made him happy that Meiko and Mod-chan got along so well.
It never got easier telling this story, but Rosan had been thinking about it for 5 years now, at some point, you just became numb to it and that's exactly how he felt.
He had to constantly ground himself back to reality, as he nearly detached himself from the conversation. Only the knowledge that he needed to gauge Meiko's reaction, kept him invested in his tale.
When he finished, he sagged a bit, only to let out an uncharacteristic yelp as something crashed into him. The tanned boy fell, back first, as a crying Meiko hugged him for dear life.
Despite the situation, Rosan was distinctively aware of just how close she was to him!
"R-Rosan, I-I'm s-s-so so s-sorry," she sobbed into his chest and he instinctively wrapped his arms around her. Rosan wanted to say something but, he was more mentally drained then he thought. He couldn't think of anything to say, so he just let her speak.
Meiko sniffed uncontrollably as she tried to compose herself. "Everything you've gone through… My Kami, Rosan you're so brave," she eventually said and the words she chose, made Rosan open his mouth slightly.
She thought…he was brave?
"H-having to watch the person who raised you, cared for you, loved you, die... You don't understand how strong you are, Rosan," she sounded choked up as she spoke. "Nobody would have been able to bounce back and yet, at only 4 years old, you focused enough to find the best way to keep you and Mod-chan safe. That's incredible Rosan," Meiko sounded so proud of him, as she repeated what Mod-chan had been trying to tell him.
The dual eyed boy was reeling from her words so Meiko took that as her chance to continue.
"I know you Rosan. You probably blame yourself for having to leave your brother behind."
His wide eyed gaze, only confirmed her suspicions and she shook her head furiously. "Listen to me Rosan. You. Were. 4. You can't be blamed for not wanting to take your little brother out to sea with you! It's already dangerous for you by yourself, what do you think would happen if you add a baby to the mix! You have nothing to blame yourself about. Do you understand me?!"
Rosan felt like he was getting scolded by Mama and he could only nod at her firm tone.
Maybe, just maybe... he really wasn't to blame for abandoning Ace? He really didn't have a choice in the matter and hearing Meiko repeat it, was really making it drive home in Rosan's head.
He felt a bit silly for disregarding what Mod-chan had been saying. He valued her words so much, but when it came to his own character, he just couldn't see reason…
Meiko's gaze softened as she wrapped her arms around Rosan delicately. "I wish I was there for you sooner, Rosan. You must have been so lonely and afraid…" she said it so soft, so compassionately and Rosan felt his heart stop as he registered one word in particular.
Afraid? He was... afraid?
Previously, Rosan would have dismissed that thought completely. He was Rosan! Anything he feared, he would deal with accordingly because the strongest couldn't fear. Now, as he looked at it from a different perspective, he looked back at all of his actions and attributed them to fear.
They fit surprisingly well.
He was afraid of acknowledging how powerless he was to save his mother.
He was afraid of acknowledging that he just wasn't ready to raise Ace.
He was afraid of acknowledging the gap in strength between him and the Marine who took his little brother.
He was afraid of acknowledging his fear of being hurt and betrayed again and that's why he closed himself off.
That's why he suppressed his emotions.
He didn't suppress them because they got in the way… he suppressed them because of what they did to him. Rosan had always been an emotional boy after all.
He was afraid.
Rosan was afraid.
The thought was so surreal, that Rosan threw his head back and let out an honest to god laugh.
"Kahahahahahahahaha!" The redhead laughed the most genuine laugh he let out in a long time because, no matter how you looked at it, Rosan was a coward.
Yet, here was this amazing and incredible person saying the exact opposite. She didn't think he was a coward for his actions. No, she thought all of his decisions made him brave. Worst of all, she genuinely believed everything she was saying. He could see it in her eyes, hear it in her words.
Meiko was really an earnest idiot!
The boy laughed so hard, tears began forming in his eyes.
Mod and Meiko watched with equal amounts of surprise for various reasons. The purple haired woman hadn't seen Rosan laugh like this since before he had been taken by Doc. If not for how out of place it was in this conversation, the Devil Fruit would have broken down crying seeing Rosan laugh so freely.
Instead, she just watched with a hand over her open mouth at the hysterical boy.
Meiko on the other hand, had never seen Rosan laughing like this ever.
Sure, she had seen the boy chuckling and even laughing in a reserved manner, but she had never seen him laugh so freely. Rosan's boyish laughter and hearing the genuine joy in his voice, made her heart slam into her chest repeatedly.
He sounded so happy and so carefree…
She didn't think it was possible to like him anymore but it seems she was proven wrong.
The tanned boy finally regained his composure after a few minutes. The boy felt breathless as he wiped away his tears and eventually, he managed to settled down.
Rosan was done running away from his fears. He would find Ace (eventually instead of never), explain the whole situation to him and whether his baby brother hated him or not, he'd take it to the chin. He would acknowledge when he feared something but instead of showing cowardice, he would try and deal with it head on.
Which is why he wanted to address this now.
"Meiko I think — no, I have a massive crush on you," Rosan said suddenly, locking his red and purple eyes onto the teary eyed girl. He had closed his heart off for fear of being hurt again because he couldn't handle the emotional pain of being hurt. His emotions were his biggest weakness because he was an emotional person. You could throw any sort of physical pain at him, but if it was mental then he was just as vulnerable, if not moreso, than anyone else.
Not anymore. He liked Meiko, so he wouldn't deny himself any longer.
Who cared if she was probably going to reject him? At least he managed to actually say it!
Mod felt her jaw drop at how blunt Rosan always was. C-couldn't he have been a bit more subtle?
Meiko felt her brain shut off at Rosan's sudden statement. It only took a matter of minutes, before she rebooted and her face turned the deepest shade of red he had seen yet.
Sachie would be proud.
"I-I-I. W-w-what. Y-y-you. Huh?" Meiko's eyes turned into swirls at the overwhelming emotions. She started swooning backwards and a small set of hands grabbed her to keep her upright. Focusing a bit revealed that the one holding her was Rosan himself. He looked a bit apprehensive, but the concern in his eyes made her stammer uncontrollably.
All that care just for her?
The girl was lightheaded and she felt as if her heart was about to burst out of her chest.
Rosan was close. Too close. This close, she was able to smell the scent of flowers on the boy and it caused her to nearly revert back to her previous state.
The genius really didn't seem to understand the effect he had on her.
She just needed to take some deep breaths. In and out. In and out. In… and out.
Stolen story; please report.
The blonde glanced at Rosan and the worry in his heterochromatic eyes made her flush.
Inandout. Inandout. Inandout.
She needed to gather her thoughts or else she'd might combust on the spot!
Rosan had just admitted that he had a crush on her. Rosan had just admitted that he had a crush on her! Meiko felt like she could die on the spot with how happy she felt! She just couldn't believe that the aloof Rosan harbored feelings for her of all people! He liked her back!
Meiko resisted the urge to squeal.
The boy had never once expressed attraction of any capacity, barring the love he felt for Mod-chan. She thought he was far too focused and closed off to ever think about something like this so to hear him confess to her first, put her over the moon!
Honestly, she didn't think her feelings were ever gonna be recuperated!
But no, here he was, with a shy blush blooming on his face, as he realized the implications of what he had just said. It dusted lightly over his bronze skin and Meiko had to try her hardest to not squeal.
Rosan was just too adorable for his own good!
She was a bit nervous though. Did she really deserve Rosan? He was so special and she was so… normal. The boy had a goal that would shoot him to the top of the world if he succeeded. In comparison, she just wanted to be a doctor…
Did she deserve to stand by the side of someone with so much ambition? The redhead had to have been the most ambitious person she ever met...
She shot Mod-chan a look. The older woman gave her a reassuring nod and a warm smile. It filled Meiko with a lot of confidence, until her crimson gaze turned mischievous and the purple haired woman mouthed out a "Go get him," before shooting her a thumbs up.
Meiko should not have looked towards the Devil Fruit. The beautiful woman was a horrible tease.
Looking back at Rosan, the blonde saw that the boy was getting more and more doubtful. She was seeing a lot of firsts because the boy was fidgeting now. This must have been hard for him and her prolonged silence, was probably not doing him any favors.
She remembered the words of Mod-chan about how he didn't think he deserved to be loved and she felt her resolve strengthen.
Rosan did deserve to be loved. He deserved it more then he realized and she'd show him!
"Rosan… I really like you," Meiko eventually said and the way Rosan's eyes widened with hope filled her with as much satisfaction as it did sadness.
He…really had expected her to deny him? Even after she told him long ago that she had a crush on him…
She wanted to hug the traumatized boy and so, that's what she did. The 9 year old had been through so much already at such a young age and getting captured by her parents, was the nail in the coffin.
She now understood why he had changed so drastically. He had already been teetering on the edge.
6 months of getting tortured, had finally pushed him over it and this was the result.
Rosan was a good person who had been forced to change, lest he be devoured by the bad people around him. The boy was an unwilling victim to this cruel world and she wanted to cry at the thought.
"I'm so sorry Rosan! You had to go through so much a-and my parents only made it worse!" She began, tearing up at the thought.
"You're such a good person and you deserve to be happy!" Meiko exclaimed passionately. She was so upset that Rosan had gone through such an awful ordeal because he didn't deserve it. The child deserved to be with his mother, helping raise his little brother and yet he couldn't.
Instead, he had been forced to become a weapon by the hands of her parents! Meiko was surprised by just how much resentment she was feeling for them at the moment.
How dare they do this to an innocent child? How could they treat him so harshly when he was so young?! Not only did he believe he was a terrible older brother, they made him believe he was nothing more then a monster, a weapon of destruction meant to hurt and kill. Her parents were just awful! Their actions were inexcusable, even from their own daughter. There was no way anyone with morals could excuse what they had been doing —
Rosan rubbed her arm soothingly and she found herself calming down instantly.
The blonde couldn't help but blink in shock at the pure anger she had been feeling. Was that really her own anger? She... she wasn't used to being angry!
It was jarring...
"Meiko, it's not like you to harbor such resentment. I'm grateful that you feel so upset on my behalf but it would do you no good to go down the same path as me," Rosan told her, voice soft. She nodded shakily, grateful that he had been there to snap her out of her anger.
Tentatively, Rosan asked Meiko "So you really like me too?" and the girl blushed beet red before flashing him a nervous smile.
"Rosan, I've liked you since we were still on Daybreak Island… I even told you," she accused.
"Well, I knew that but at the time, I thought it was just a small crush no?" Rosan wondered in curiosity. He had known Meiko harbored feelings towards him but not to this extent!
He had thought it was just a silly crush that would go away in time.
Her mouth formed an O as she fully understood his question. "It was the day you told me about Save Point! When you told me that my safety was one of your priorities... it made me feel something new for you," she confessed, suddenly turning shy as she looked towards the floor.
Rosan nodded at her response with a slightly surprised expression. "I realized I liked you after I gave you the earrings… seeing you in that dress made me look at you in a new light and I started thinking about who you are as a person... the results are this," he explained to her .
Meiko looked equally surprised. "Oh. We realized we liked each other only a day apart," she pointed out and Rosan nodded in amusement. That was a funny coincidence!
After a comfortable silence digesting what they said, Meiko asked Rosan a question.
"Did… did I really look good in that dress?"
"...Yes you did."
"Rosan…"
"Yes, Meiko?"
"You're kind of a pervert."
"...I don't wanna hear that from you Meiko."
Meiko flushed at the deadpan expression on the redheads face. She was not a pervert!
She looked at Mod-chan for support, but the purple haired woman was pointedly looking away from her and inspecting her always perfect nails for mistakes.
Traitor!
She pouted in defeat and Rosan grinned in victory, before she became serious.
"Rosan I want to help you get better if you'll let me," Meiko grabbed his small hands and looked at him with nothing but compassion in her gaze.
Seeing Rosan so vulnerable, reminded her of just how young he was. Meiko wasn't very tall, but Rosan was so small and, though he was fit, underneath his clothing was a slim figure.
His time at Daybreak had made the redhead somewhat malnourished but Modification and his diet was already helping in spades in keeping his body well.
"Help me how?" Rosan was genuinely curious and the child watched the blonde take his hands into her own. He would normally dismiss any and all help unless it was from Mod-chan but he hadn't even been accepting help from her. He prided himself on being receptive to change yet, here he was doing the complete opposite.
Pathetic.
"Whatever you need help with of course!" Meiko replied cheerfully. Rosan hummed in contemplation at her words and he cupped his chin.
"I'll always be there for you Rosan so please…promise me that you'll never leave me," Meiko requested and she sounded so earnest, so desperate, that Rosan felt a small pang.
He was hesitant to make promises. Promises were something that held so much value to him yet they could be so easily broken and it always ended up hurting him in the process.
He loved and missed her but, a part of him resented his Mama for making a promise that they'd be together. Rouge had to have known about the problems of holding Ace for that long, yet she still promised him.
She had lied in the worst way to him and now he would never see her again.
He resented himself for breaking his promise to Mod-chan and allowing his anger to get the best of him. Sure, it was out of his power, but he hadn't made much attempts until recently to get it under control. He tried to keep his smile for the Devil Fruit but he had failed and that was unforgivable.
Most of all, he resented Robin for tricking him so thoroughly. They had promised to keep each other safe and Rosan had fully believed in it like he did every promise but, like the others, it had been broken and he had been on the receiving end of it, resulting in him turning into this.
Needless to say, Rosan had his reservations about making an oath. It was pretty clear that he was bad at keeping promises, even if they were mostly out of his control.
The look in Meiko's blue eyes though… Rosan knew no other answer would be acceptable. He was starkly reminded that Meiko had developed abandonment issues due to his actions on Daybreak. The girl was terrified of being left behind and it played a part in why she was traveling with him currently. He was all she had left and she had attached to that knowledge like a lifeline.
He could understand where she was coming from.
She was as afraid of being left behind, as he was of being betrayed.
"Meiko I promise I won't ever leave you if you promise to always be by my side, no matter what I do," Rosan said softly.
Any sane person would understand the unfairness of what Rosan was asking but that's why he was asking it. The redhead wouldn't put a promise on anything else. If Meiko was serious about this then he'd see right here —
"I promise!" She said without hesitation.
Rosan and Mod-chan (who had just been watching the entire exchange with warm eyes) blinked owlishly at her rather abrupt answer. He had expected her to at least think a little on it…
"You really don't find an issue with what I'm asking?" Rosan was confused. What he was asking was completely unreasonable so why would she so readily agree? The 9 year old had intended to stay with her regardless but he just used this as an excuse so he didn't need to make a promise. But, here she was, puffed up like she had just scammed him thoroughly.
"Of course not silly!" She said, making it seem like what he was asking was a given. "I want to stay by your side anyways so you're asking a pretty stupid question!" The blonde chastised with a large grin.
Everything Meiko said sounded so genuine, that Rosan found himself blown away.
"You… you won't betray me? You won't leave me...?" The boy whispered and he sounded so exposed that it broke her heart. It took everything for Meiko to hold back her tears. The boy, because he was just a boy, just wanted people he could trust.
Rosan didn't want to be alone, but he was too scarred to let anyone in.
What a torturous way to live...
Meiko and Mod both engulfed the boy in a bone-crushing hug. They held onto him like a lifeline just so he could know that they were there for him.
"Rosan, I would never betray you because honestly, I think I love you," Meiko confessed and Rosan felt his heart stop at her admittance. Feeling particularly bold, Meiko planted a reassuring kiss on his cheek and Rosan's brain froze as emotion began to overwhelm him.
"Rosan, listen to me. Meiko wants nothing but the best for you," Mod said and the woman soothingly rubbed his crimson hair. "She's a wonderful person and she cares about you… I think, no I know you can trust her," she finished.
Rosan felt himself warm as he heard the reassuring words coming from them. They were full of love and care and he just… he had forgotten how nice it all felt.
Unaware to both Mod and Rosan, deep inside of his body, the castle of ice made when Rosan was on Daybreak loomed high.
It's crystalline surface reflected the minimal light granting it an ethereal glow. It looked exactly the same, save for the chains. Where before they were secured firmly around the castle, now the death grip had loosened slightly. The entrance was ajar and inside the only resident of the castle began to sleep easier.
Back with Rosan, the boy was confused to feel something wet rolling down his cheeks.
Strange, the rain didn't reach here.
He looked at Meiko and though she was crying, her tears couldn't magically roll down his cheek. A look at Mod-chan, confirmed the exact same thing.
Rosan touched his face and was shocked to find that he was crying. Tears were rolling down his cheeks and it left him reeling in astonishment.
Why was he crying? Surely their words hadn't affected him that much... Right?
But here he was, shedding tears as a surge of relief coursed it's way through his body.
The last time he had cried, was when he realized Robin was not coming for him. His Mama had always told him big boys don't cry when he got hurt and he had taken that to heart. Rosan saw crying as a sign of weakness and, when his goal was to become the strongest, there was no time to be weak.
He would never cry from pain. Never again.
But... was it okay to cry if the tears weren't from pain? It was fine if he was crying tears of relief, right?
If his tears were positive?
Yes it was. He decided it was okay, because he was happy that he had such wonderful people to rely on.
So Rosan clutched them back, surprising them greatly, and allowed his tears to fall freely. He held onto them for dear life, as if they could disappear at any moment.
Meiko and Mod heard the 9 year old let out a desperate whimper and the dams broke. To see the boy in such a raw state, it was too much for the two and they could no longer hold back their emotion.
Meiko had never even seen Rosan show any sign of weakness before today and it felt riveting. Knowing that the boy was still capable of tears, of feeling such emotions filled her with an undeniable sense of relief.
He was no emotionless monster. Rosan was a child. A child who desperately needed help that the world wasn't willing to give him.
Well she would be the one to help him!
No matter what it took.
Mod was just as bad as Rosan was, when it came to blaming oneself.
She blamed herself for forcing Rosan's hand in making the agonizing decision to abandon his little brother. If she had not told him about the dangers of what came with eating the Mod Mod no mi, the boy would be raising little Ace right now.
She blamed herself for making Rosan put such high expectations onto himself. The boy did everything for her, he didn't allow himself to fail because it could potentially jeopardize her safety.
She blamed herself for Rosan thinking he betrayed the Devil Fruit by breaking his promise when he had no say in the matter. She would never have had him make that promise if she knew he would have taken it to heart for something he couldn't control.
She blamed herself for not being there when Rosan was ruthlessly toyed with on Daybreak island by that disgusting man who morphed him into a cold blooded killer. While he had been suffering nonstop, she had been sleeping. Seastone or not, she should never have allowed her child to be alone.
She blamed herself for not being able to convince him that Robin was innocent. There was no world where Robin would ever betray Rosan. She truly did love the boy with all her heart but her charge was too angry to see that.
But most of all, she blamed herself for lacking the ability to change Rosan back to how he used to be.
How could she convince Rosan that he wasn't what he said he was? The two had been together forever. She had an undeniable bias when it came to the boy and they both knew it.
Even if that bias played no part in what she honestly believed, it would never be able to convince Rosan that what he said was not true.
Yet Meiko, bless her beautiful soul, had none of that bias. In fact, she had all the tools necessary to hate Rosan and they all knew it.
After everything Rosan had done to her, any person would have wholeheartedly agreed with his own sentiments. The redhead fully expected the blonde to hate him and it would have only reaffirmed his own beliefs.
But no, in a shock to both of them, The 11 year old had instead confessed that she was likely in love with the boy. The sheer shock value of what she said, was enough to make Rosan seriously reconsider his own values because what bias would she have against him? He had taken everything from her except for her life after all. There should be no bias.
Her parents had been killed by his hands, her island had been destroyed, everyone she knew and love was gone and it was all because of Rosan.
Yet she said she loved him.
It was fitting that the two liked each other. They were both very clearly insane.
Mod knew it was selfish and immoral to think, but she didn't care. She was glad Rosan had done what he did and that they had Meiko now.
Because of Meiko, Rosan could get better and Rosan would always be the Devil Fruit's number one priority.
Mod would be eternally grateful for what Meiko had done.
The three cried as they held onto each other yet none of it was sadness.
No, there was only relief in those tears.
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Meiko's eyes went soft at the memory and she put a hand over her heart from the lingering emotions.
Over the months, Rosan had been making an earnest effort to be more open with her and it was showing!
He was much more expressive now and though he was still a bit standoffish, the boy didn't try to put walls up between them anymore. The redhead was open with how he was feeling and due to his inexperience with emotions, she would help him out in any way that he could.
Meiko had slight regrets though.
Rosan was… well to put it in simple terms, Rosan was chaotic…to an extreme degree. The boy did whatever he felt like and the consequences didn't bother him at all!
The redhead had once asked her to teach him how to cook and she had agreed readily, happy that he wanted to learn and said he could watch her prepare dinner. The boy had insisted she just tell him what to do and, seeing no harm in it, she agreed.
She was a bit worried when Angel, Demon, and even Mod-chan commented on how bad of an idea it was but love made a girl do stupid things.
Next time, she would heed their warnings. If not for how well modified the White Rose was, Rosan would certainly have burned down the entire ship. The sleek, advanced ship had taken the beating it like a champ because Rosan's cooking was horrendous.
Worst of all, the child had the gall to say her teaching was terrible and that's why he failed so spectacularly. The disbelief she shot the boy, due to his sheer audacity, made him laugh at her.
Wanting to prove a point, Rosan had told her to make dinner and he'd standby and watch her the entire time. She didn't know where he was going with this so she did exactly as he said and prepared an actually edible meal for them to eat.
She watched with her jaw dropped as, the very next day, Rosan made the exact same meal she had made the night previously with absolutely no differences.
Somehow, the redhead had perfectly replicated their dinner!
Meiko spluttered as she took a bite and saw that it even tasted the same!
"So how does it taste?" The smugness in his voice almost made her lie to him right then and there. She refrained from it because he'd be able to tell anyways.
"How were you able to perfectly replicate my dish?!" She asked in return refusing to answer the question.
The boy shrugged in superiority and Meiko wanted to strangle him, as he smugly said "I just watched you cook it and did everything you did. It's actually pretty easy and I even noticed that you made some mistakes! Next time I can make an even better dish."
He deftly moved out of the way of her lunge and sat right on her back. She kicked her legs fruitlessly and the asshole just laughed at her.
"Thanks for teaching me how to cook, Mei," Rosan teased her and she flushed in anger.
She didn't teach him anything!
"I hate you Rosy," she grumbled and he patted her head gently. The ass was still sitting on her back and he made no move to get up.
Meiko really hated geniuses.
Something about the whole process confused her though.
"Rosan you watch me cook all the time so how did you even manage to mess up your first time that badly?"
"Well that's because most of the time I'm not actually watching you cook, I'm watching you," he replied easily and she blushed darkly, all anger forgotten.
That was another thing, Rosan had no shame whatsoever. He didn't realize the implications of some of his statements until you pointed it out. Then when he did realize, he would start teasing you relentlessly.
Maybe she should have just left him without emotion. It was easier for her that way.
Meiko didn't regret it though. She never would because seeing Rosan defer to her like this, made her feel glad she offered her assistance. The boy was opening up and it warmed her to the core. It was why they were currently visiting Baterilla!
Rosan was afraid to visit his mother's grave because he thought he had failed the late woman by leaving Ace behind. The boy had not visited her in 6 years! That just wasn't fair to the woman at all!
Meiko had put her foot down and told him they'd visit her grave the first chance they got. He looked pensive at that but the blonde reassured him that she would be his moral support. The Modification user agreed reluctantly but the grateful smile he shot her, told the girl all she needed to know.
The only issue, was that they were in the North Blue currently and Rosan was raised in the South Blue.
Getting from the North Blue to the South Blue was not an easy task. The Blue Sea was separated by the imposing Red Line, the world's sole continent and as such, travel was extremely difficult without being connected to the World Government.
Rosan had told her that he had traveled through the South Blue before making the decision to go to the North Blue when he was 6. The West Blue was out of the question for him because he had been traveling with Nico Robin and he heard that the Hero of the Marines loved to frequent the East Blue so that was also not an option.
She had questioned how he could have possibly gotten to the North Blue from the South and he said he used the Calm Belt. Her jaw dropped as he casually mentioned going through the notoriously treacherous strip of ocean (the one full of Sea Kings). She had voiced her worries and Rosan had smiled reassuringly.
"I had Mod-chan guiding me and the White Rose is an advanced ship, it can move without wind because of my abilities and it's really fast! We might have had a run in with some Sea Kings but we just ran," he said with utmost confidence and she had no choice but to believe him.
"You don't have to worry though, we won't need to take the Calm Belt this time," Rosan said and at her curious gaze, he simply said "We'll just fly over the Red Line."
...Fly?
"Fly?" Meiko repeated and Rosan nodded.
"It will be less dangerous if we just fly over the Red Line. I have a lot of stamina so it won't be an issue," he shrugged.
She furrowed her brow a bit and frowned. "You're gonna carry me the entire time? Won't that be hard on you? I have been putting some weight on…"
Rosan lightly chopped her on the head and he said "Shut up Mei. You're just going through puberty and you know that. Don't be so critical of yourself when you're telling me not to do that."
He grabbed her and pulled her into an embrace. "You're so helpful to me, but you also have problems of your own," Rosan hummed and she flushed in shame at how blunt his accurate assessment of her was.
"There's no need to be self conscious Mei. You're perfect just the way you are," Rosan said as he rubbed her back.
"You're only saying that to make me feel better…" Meiko mumbled into his red spikes. Rosan had taken it out of its bun, since she loved it when it was down, and now, the spikes were running freely on his head again. They reached just above his back and were much less disheveled then when he was a kid.
"Mei, you've been training in medicine for a while, I'm sure you know what's happening to you is natural and that you're over exaggerating. There's no need to get upset about it because you still look great," Rosan calmly explained to her.
The blonde nodded glumly. "Having self esteem issues mixed with hormones is hard, Rosy," and he just laughed that laugh she loved to hear.
"You're cute Mei and you're gonna end up beautiful when all is said and done," he spoke with absolute confidence and Meiko felt a blush forming on her face. She blushed way too much around Rosan... but she couldn't help it!
"Meiko, I like everything about you and that's all that matters. Forget what anyone else thinks because they don't matter. As long as I think you're fine, then you're fine," the 10 year old said firmly and the 12 year old could feel the possessiveness in his tone.
She hoped no one ever showed interest in her when Rosan was around. The blonde would never reciprocate them, but something told her Rosan could be quite unreasonable.
The blue eyed girl found his possessive streak cute, but when she thought about what it could mean for other people… it suddenly looked really scary.
"So what will you do with Angel, Demon, and the White Rose while flying to the North Blue?" Meiko suddenly asked, as the thought came to her.
"I'm shrinking the ship since we won't need it and I'll be carrying all 3 of you of course," was his response and Meiko's brow furrowed once again.
"Rosan I know you're strong but you're um… you're not the biggest of people," she tried to explain without triggering the boy. "I don't see how you'll be able to carry all of us in your arms," she eventually finished and was relieved to see the boy only looked mildly annoyed.
His annoyance was quickly wiped away by realization. "You think Shinigami is my only transformation." It wasn't a question but she nodded anyways.
Rosan smiled.
----------------------------------------
Meiko, sitting next to the far too calm duo of Demon and Angel, screamed in joy as she rode on the back of the massive dragon that was Rosan. The black dragon with red highlights sped through the clouds at a rapid pace with the current passengers on his back.
She had no idea the Mod Mod no mi user could transform into a Dragon of all things!
When he had first transformed, Meiko had been quivering in a primal sort of terror at the sight of the winged reptile. But after letting out a terrifyingly loud roar, the obsidian Dragon had immediately rested its head onto its claws and stared at her with a familiar intelligent gaze.
"R-Rosan? Are you there?" the blonde asked tentatively, stepping closer to those large, familiar, heterochromatic eyes. They were on an uninhabited island (Rosan had mentioned invading this island before when he was younger) and so no one but the residents of the White Rose were here.
The dragon rumbled deeply in confirmation and though it rattled her bones, she stepped forward in awe and began to pet his scales. The rumbles began to sound more like purring and Meiko couldn't resist the urge to giggle.
He raised a claw carefully, so as to not hurt her, and gently pressed it against her head. Meiko felt the familiar sensation of linking and after blinking she experimentally said "Rosan?"
"Meiko this is Ragnarok," she heard his high pitched voice greet her. Hearing Rosan's childish voice on the form of such a magnificent creature made Meiko laugh way harder then she would have liked.
Her laughing turned into a terrified squeak as a massive tail wrapped around her and firmly placed her on the Dragon's back. Rosan's amusement was palpable and she heard the dragon let out a deep snort.
She pouted at him. "That was mean Rosan," she chastised him.
"Nobody told you to laugh at me," He chastised the girl and she scowled at him.
"I wasn't expecting to hear your voice from the dragon," she reasoned and she got the sense that the boy was rolling his eyes.
"Do you prefer this then?" Rosan's voice suddenly deepened harshly, into a low, aggressive growl.
Meiko paled dramatically and shook her head in a negative. "N-no thank you I'd rather not. Your voice is much better anyways." He sounded as terrifying as he looked and if she had to hear that in her head for the entire ride, she wouldn't be sleeping.
"Funny, I thought the same thing," Rosan agreed snidely, voice back to normal.
"Rosan's voice is pretty adorable," Mod chimed in and Meiko smiled in joy at hearing the Devil Fruit.
"Isn't it?! Rosan's just the cutest wouldn't you agree?" Meiko grinned as she felt Rosan's annoyance spike.
"He's cute and he knows it! You should have seen him when he was younger! He would liberally abuse how adorable he was to get his way! Even his mother fell victim to it," she gushed.
"Wow, how crafty of you Rosan!" Meiko teased.
"We're leaving now," Rosan said blandly, avoiding the conversation like a plague. They both laughed at his misfortune and he expertly ignored it.
Angel and Demon both leapt onto the resting Dragon's back and the three got into a comfortable position. His scaly back was not nearly as rough as they thought and they attributed it to the fact that he most likely modified it with them in mind.
"It's normally rough but I've modified it for comfort this time," Rosan explained confirming their thoughts. "The ride will take a while and I wouldn't want you 3 to be uncomfortable the entire time."
It was small things such as this, that made Meiko really love Rosan.
The black dragon stood up after everyone was prepared and, with a flap of his massive wings, Rosan was airborne. Another flap and the boy was soaring high above the clouds.
Meiko's screams of elation rang through the sky as the draconian flew off.
They had been flying for a few hours now at a leisurely pace due to Rosan wanting her to enjoy the ride and Meiko had calmed down from her initial high. Angel and Demon were content to just speak to each other so that left Meiko to talk with Rosan and Mod-chan.
The fly over to South Blue brought another issue to her mind.
"Rosan, I want to talk to you about something" Meiko said a bit hesitant to bring this up. The blonde just knew that if she asked him wrong, Rosan would shut down completely.
Rosan sensed her trepidation and replied, in a serious tone, "What is it Meiko? There's no need to be hesitant."
"Can you tell me about your relationship with… Nico Robin maybe?" she tentatively asked him. After a long silence, she hastily added "S-sorry I shouldn't have asked that please just ignore my question!"
She messed up, she shouldn't have asked him that. Oh no, what if they went back to square one now?! Speaking about Nico Robin was a sore spot for Rosan.
Mod-chan had told Meiko that she had to walk on eggshells when bringing up the Devil Child but she had thought they were making such good progress… She just hoped Rosan wouldn't put his walls back up —
"Nico Robin was my companion of 4 years," Rosan began and Meiko blinked in shock. "She was someone that I thought I could trust with my life. But when I chose to trust her with my life, she showed me the harsh reality that the only person I can trust is myself."
Meiko frowned, as Mod-chan let out a tired "Oh Rosan…"
Did the Devil Fruit not agree with Rosan? She hadn't told her much about Robin, but the purple haired beauty didn't seem to resent the girl like Rosan did. On the contrary, Mod-chan seemed quite fond of the Devil Child.
She wondered if the two had gotten into an argument about the fugitive. Mod-chan scarcely mentioned her around Rosan. When the woman had told her to refrain from mentioning Robin, she sounded almost afraid of what could happen.
"We were very close but she left me to rot at that place."
Rosan's voice hadn't gotten this cold in a long time.
"That place… do you mean Daybreak?" Talking about her island when his tone was this grave, was never good for either of them but her curiosity for Robin and concern for Rosan, outweighed her fear.
"Yes. For 4 years we were together up until I messed up and got captured… for one month I clung on to that silly promise Robin and I made to each other and I suffered because of it. While I was getting tortured within an inch of my life, hoping and praying she'd come help me, she was joining up with other organizations and doing what we did alone," Rosan delivered in a stony tone, voice not betraying anything.
"I was under the impression that we relied on each other. I was foolish to think that I could rely on anyone but myself."
Meiko felt tears well up as he spoke. Rosan's voice was without emotion, but he could never hide the raw pain in it. His entire personality shift, when she had seen him again on Daybreak, suddenly made sense. She thought her father had finally gotten his wish but the stress from all the pain and the realization that someone you trusted with your life was not coming for you, was too much for anyone to handle.
Whether it was her fault or not, Nico Robin was the catalyst that caused Rosan to reach his breaking point. Even if Robin was innocent, in the child's eyes, what she did was unforgivable.
"…" Mod wanted so badly to defend Robin but she couldn't justify her actions in the eyes of Rosan. The redhead had made a promise with Robin and despite how impossible it was, the Hana Hana no mi user had not been able to keep said promise.
The Devil Fruit didn't blame Robin for being unable to find them. She loved that girl, of course she could never blame her!
But Rosan did and because he did, there was not much she could do about it. She could only hope that as Rosan aged and spent time around Meiko, he'd become more reasonable.
"Rosan… why do you value promises so much?" Meiko asked in genuine curiosity. Promises were important to her but the extent that Rosan valued them, was scary.
She wasn't sure anyone valued promises as much as the redhead. He treated them like they were sacred and that made her realize why he asked her that question in their mindscape.
"Mama told me when you make a promise you should do everything in your power to keep it," Rosan sighed forlornly, as he reminisced on a time long ago. "Even though she lied to me and couldn't keep her promise… I still love her and I value everything she has told me."
"I couldn't raise Ace like she wanted, so I can at least keep her lessons close to my heart."
"Broke your promise?" Meiko asked him.
"She promised that after she gave birth to Ace we'd be together… just the 3 of us but, she died giving birth to him instead and left me."
Rosan's voice cracked a bit as he spoke about his mother. "I told her that holding the baby for so long would only be detrimental to her health and I was right, but I wish I wasn't. The stress of childbirth killed my mother."
Meiko's eyes went soft and she wanted nothing more then to hug Rosan and tell him it's alright. He sounded so hollow. The 10 year old had been living with this for so long and the mental strain, just kept piling on top of each other.
She admired Rosan for not breaking. He was one of the strongest people she knew mentally.
"Rosan, I understand your frustrations, but I don't think Robin willingly abandoned you," Meiko said in a near whisper. The blonde knew she was playing with fire right now, but Rosan trusted her to set him straight and that's what she would do!
"Meiko," his voice came out low and the warning in it was obvious. She flinched a bit at his tone and second guessed her actions.
"M-maybe we should talk about something else?"
Mod sounded nervous. Really nervous. They had talked about this before then. Judging by how anxious the Devil Fruit sounded… the conversation had not ended well.
The clones shared her sentiment, if the way they were shuddering was an indication.
Right, they were naturally connected to Rosan. They just revered him too much to actively use the connection.
Well, Meiko would not back down from this.
"Rosan… Dad was very meticulous," Meiko began hesitantly, making sure to use the right wording. "It's very likely that he's been planning your capture for…a long time and he'd made the steps necessary to ensure Nico Robin couldn't find you."
"Also… I remember him mentioning to Mom, that he informed the Marines about her whereabouts. Can you imagine trying to look for someone and having no clue where to start and on top of that, the Marines are hunting you in spades… I think she had no choice but to join an organization…"
Meiko got nervous at the absolute silence. Not even Mod was saying anything but the purple haired woman's fear was tangible.
The clones had long since stopped whispering to each other and they were nervously glancing around. Angel was clutching Demon's hand in reassurance as the male clone looked to her for safety.
Meiko frowned sadly. How was Rosan able to cause such a reaction? It was sad to see how touchy of a subject this was.
"What do you want me to do then Meiko?" Rosan's voice came out in a near whisper.
"Should I chase her around the world just so I can have closure? What will that achieve? Do you honestly think any answer she gives me will satisfy me? Nico Robin emotionally destroyed me Meiko. I trusted her to save me but nobody came. I don't care if she didn't have a choice and maybe that makes me selfish but I can't just rationalize the pain and suffering I endured away. What I'm feeling right now... it's not based on logic Meiko."
Rosan's speech was bitter and resigned and Meiko just wanted to stop right there.
But she couldn't do that. The 12 year old knew that Rosan was hurt that no one had saved him. He needed an outlet and he chose Nico Robin. But that wasn't fair to the girl that had been with him for 4 years!
She didn't deserve to be hated by someone who she still very likely loved.
"How do you think Robin will feel when you meet her one day and you want nothing more then to strike her down?" Meiko asked Rosan seriously. "She probably thinks your dead, Rosan! How will she react if you two suddenly see each other again and you harbor nothing but hatred for her?!"
"…" Rosan said nothing.
"You need an outlet Rosan I understand… Please, you can use me if you want. I am the daughter of the two who made your life hell…" Meiko sounded sad, but accepting, as she said that.
"Don't even suggest something so stupid Meiko," Rosan snarled out and he sounded so angry that Meiko actually leaned back in surprise. "I would never hate you because of who your parents are. It's just… I don't know what this feeling is." The boy sounded lost and her eyes became understanding.
"I know it's hard Rosan. To feel such powerful emotions and not knowing what to do," Meiko whispered to him "It's okay to feel like this Rosan… that's what makes us human."
"That's what makes us…human," Rosan said to himself in wonder. He had always fancied himself a monster but maybe… maybe he wasn't as far gone as he thought?
Robin had left him behind, that much was true. But, maybe Rosan never considered the circumstances that led to that.
No, that wasn't quite right. Rosan refused to acknowledge the possible circumstances.
Rosan knew Doc. They had spent far too much time in each others presence, for him to not pick up on the craftiness of the Doctor. Knowing him, he had probably left a corpse behind that matched his figure to ensure no one would look too hard for him.
It was very likely, that Robin had begun searching for him with the knowledge that he may very well be dead.
Coupled with the fact the Marines were probably searching for her…
Had she been forced to give up her search?
Yes, most likely. The Marines would swarm every island in pursuit of the Devil Child. There was a very real possibility that Robin had to accept the fact that Rosan was probably dead; and with a heavy heart, she was forced to leave.
He wouldn't be surprised if she went to the Grand Line... Travelling to the other Seas was difficult.
Rosan also had possession of the White Rose, so Robin would have needed to find a way to get off the island safely… which probably meant she joined up with an organization...
It was obviously clear that she had not abandoned him by choice.
So why?
Why did he still feel such rage?
He understood now, so why? Why?! WHY?!
"You're only 10 Rosan," Mod-chan spoke up softly. "You feel hurt and you feel betrayal. You aren't used to feeling such overwhelming emotions and that's okay. As you grow older, you'll better learn how to control them."
"Mm!" Meiko agreed "I'll be there to help you the whole time Rosan so make sure you talk to Robin because she must have been worried sick about you!" The girl demanded and Rosan let out a small chuckle as he finally conceded.
What would he do without them?
"Like I told Mod-chan, I will talk to Robin if I ever see her. Looking for her is not my priority though. If we find each other, we find each other but for now, I simply want to get stronger," Rosan told her and she nodded.
That would be for the best, as Rosan got older he'd be able to sort out his errant emotions easier so his meeting with Robin wouldn't go south.
Mod was elated at how smoothly the conversation had went! Watching Rosan make an earnest attempt for them, warmed her to the core. The woman feared that Rosan would have lashed out harshly on Meiko but, he seemed to have remembered their argument so long ago.
If that made this conversation go smoother, Mod was glad they had it in the first place.
Even without near eidetic memory it would have been hard to forget.
Meiko was so glad that Rosan was being receptive to criticism. It made helping him that much easier and they were making real progress because of it. It filled her with more joy then she could imagine, that someone valued her words so much.
Angel and Demon were thankful that their Master hadn't lost his temper. They knew exactly what Rosan was capable of doing as a Dragon. Daybreak Island being burned into nothing was a very vivid reminder.
They shuddered at the utter mayhem a Draconic Rosan would cause. He had managed to destroy an island with a power he wielded for the first time. The destruction he could cause after training so much… They didn't even want to think about it!
"My clones have such little faith in me," Rosan said in a vexed tone causing their eyes to widen.
"N-no it's nothing like that, Master!" Angel hastily assured him. She was waving her hands frantically in an attempt to persuade him.
"We were just wary of the possibility that it could happen," Demon agreed with just as much panic.
A snort cut them both off, as Rosan said "You two are so easy."
The amusement in his tone was noticeable and the two scowled at his teasing tone.
Master was much less of a jerk before, Angel decided.
Demon nodded sagely.
Mod laughed at their misfortune.
Meiko giggled at Rosan's ever growing confusion.
"… I'm not that bad right?"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"You're an agent of chaos, Rosan," Meiko, bless her soul, finally spoke for the rest of them when it became clear that no one else was going to speak up.
"I hate you all."