What is joy?

... I once asked this very exact question to my mother.

"You are my joy, sweetie," she replied.

I appreciated the answer, though it didn't really answer my question...

I even asked the priest the same question. Apparently, the answers can vary, each as unique as the individual experiencing it.

From what I've gathered, typically, joy is a powerful emotion that includes in itself many others, such as happiness and pleasure; gratitude, appreciation...

It is actually more than a mere emotion, it's a mixture of positive feelings that makes us grateful, even if only for a brief moment, to be alive.

It can come from many sources: a sunny day, while for many others it could come from a cloudy one; a cute puppy licking your face, tasty food, the death of your enemies, the clean sensation after a bath or, straightforwardly, from a good news.

The news, the only and mere possibility of being a member of the Abyss Reavers gave me intense joy. An emotion I rarely experienced...

But even if overjoyed, I made sure to keep my guard up, always; having high expectations could prove self-defeating if they were not met.

'Believe, but don't expect anything,' that's what my mother always used to tell me. And I made sure to embody her teachings.

Still, despite appearances, I was partially overjoyed as I walked down this white stone road... But what should I exactly feel when a supernatural creature is touching me?

...

"It's touching me?!"

The demon touched me; it gripped me, firmly, by my shoulder.

"It's cold! It's as if a beast made of ice is grasping me! Is this the Death's embrace?!"

I kept ignoring what was happening in my surroundings while my mind slowly processed the situation.

Joey, the guards, everything else... nothing existed anymore. All my senses were reserved for the demon.

"No demon has ever touched me before! They are not tangible!"

I sought answers to questions outside of my realm of comprehension.

"What does it want? Is it angry because I've ignored it?" its grip continued to tighten; it hurt, it was painful.

Did it want something from me? Was it seeking my attention? My life?

What was the right thing to do?

My tired mind continued to seek for answers, but without success.

'Face your fear, gaze into the Abyss,' they say... What is the right thing to do, when forced to gaze into the Abyss head-on? Should I face the demon?

Suddenly, I found myself, once again, back to the real world; something else was now over my shoulder.

"Hey?" It was Joey's hand. His hand and the demon's were not touching, meaning that the demon could only grasp me with its ice-cold claws. A fact that didn't reassure me at all.

I kept looking at my shoulder, Joey must have thought I was unsettled by his touch, as he withdrew his hand.

Shortly after, as if mirroring Joey's actions, the demon released its grip, leaving my shoulder alone. A sigh of relief escaped me.

"First thing we do as soon as we get in the city is find an inn," Joey said to me, looking extremely concerned. "You absolutely have to rest."

"Huh... Ah, yes. Sure. You're right," I managed to reply.

"Maybe, even a healer..." he added.

"No... I am fine, Joey, really... I'm just tired," I countered, giving a faint smile to reassure him. He pursed his lips, but he seemed convinced enough.

And so, once peacefully passed the guard, we crossed the gate and entered the city, Zafferbridge.

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The first impact of the city had to be attributed to its display of colors; wherever your eyes would go, they were welcomed with hues of bright yellow, and some faint hints of red. From the first look it was noticeable, even evident, that this city was wealthy; it was rational that the most powerful guilds were stationed here, further influencing its splendor; nothing like the old and dull place I was.

Many towers stood tall, imposing their proud eminence casting shadows over the bustling streets beneath. Each tower had apparent tiers, crowned with uniquely adorned roofs on every level. I had never seen such structures; without a doubt, those were important buildings.

Even there, putting aside the one following me, there were no demons. "That's strange," I thought, "Usually, the cities are full of them... I still can't see them."

From time to time, I would glance at it out of the corner of my eye, in case it tried to pull something strange again.

I would've liked to head straight to the guild right away, but Joey's priority was to find an inn and allow me to rest. To some extent, I also agreed with that idea; many were the days I had gone without sleep, nor I had the chance to, although my body was surprisingly getting used to it. Perhaps death really counted as a way go catch up on it.

Found an inn and secured individual rooms, we ventured in. Even the inns were incredibly fancy in this city; the rooms were large and spacious, adorned with elegant furnishings and illuminated by a little lamp on a bedside table at the right side of the bed emanating a feeble, soft yellow light, creating the right atmosphere for a comfortable and peaceful rest. But before, I went to the bathroom, looking myself in the mirror; Joey was right, I was paler than a ghost, as if all the blood had vanished from my skin. Somehow, my white hair seemed brighter than my face. I really needed rest... And so, tossing my belongings aside, I tucked myself under the soft silk of the blankets; not too warm, not too cold.

Ah, pure perfection. I finally embarked on the adventurous attempt to sleep...

Sleep... what a concept. How was I even supposed to sleep with a demon staring at me?!

The demon was right in front of me, staring deep into my eyes as I reciprocated. "There is no way I'm sleeping like this," or so I thought; despite my best efforts to keep an eye on it, I eventually collapsed...

... Upon my awakening, I felt somehow weaker than before my well-deserved rest, and hungry. "Strange," I thought, usually I never felt hunger upon waking.

With the gears of my mind getting in motion once again, I promptly stood up, looking for the demon. "It's gone...?" For some reason, it wasn't in the room. Anticipating another jumpscare, with a quick twist I checked behind me, neither it was there...

Maybe under the bed?

... No, neither. It just looked like it disappeared.

"Huh..." I couldn't help but feel surprised. "Well, better."

Shaking off the thought from my mind, I proceeded to treat myself to a nice and refreshing clean-up in the fancy inn, before heading out.

The sun was already high, "I must've slept quite a lot," I thought, covering my eyes, no longer accustomed to the bright light.

"There you are; you're finally awake," Joey approached me from the side. "I was getting worried, I even asked an attendant to check on you."

That seemed unnecessary. "You worry too much," I calmly reassured him. "After what we've been through, it's normal to sleep a few hours too much."

Pursing his lips together, he gave me an even more concerned look. "If it were only a few hours, I would have understood that... but you've been sleeping for almost two days," he explained.

"Oh," the revelation quite surprised me for a moment. "Well, now I understand why I'm so hungry," I quickly dismissed the matter as I found little importance dwelling on it. After all, I firmly believed that the body naturally rested the necessary amount it needed to regenerate itself at a sufficient amount to sustain itself adequately.

I felt good; my body, too, felt good... rejuvenated, even. Nothing better than a good rest to recover one's mind and soul. I recalled how my mother would often mull over the importance of a good night's sleep; she would always send me to bed with a warm glass of milk, affectionately caressing my head while I slowly drifted off to sleep nestled against her chest, free from any worries and without a care in the world. In the morning, I would magically wake up in my bed, while she would meditate outside the front door of our house; I often found myself mimicking her routine, although I never really understood the meaning behind meditation, nor what it truly meant to meditate.

Filled our stomachs, it was finally time for me to head to the guild and to reveal to Joey the true purpose of this journey. No sight of demons around; although the matter was nagging me, my energies were entirely focused on the guild.

The Abyss Reavers' headquarters was a tall, striking yellow building proudly displaying an insignia of two crossed axes; it even had a sign beside its glass doors. A short staircase of three steps was all that separated us from the front door.

"W-w-why are we here?!" Joey stammered as soon as I approached the little staircase.

I turned to him. "I'm about to join this guild," I nonchalantly explained.

"You're joining the guild?! I thought we came to this city for a change of pace!" he exclaimed; he looked extremely agitated.

"Yes, this is my change of pace," I remarked with a bright, affirming smile.

"W-why do you want to join the Abyss Reavers? Of all the guilds..." he murmured.

"How do you even know them?" I asked him. "You're not even in a guild."

"They're famous!" he exclaimed. "The Abyss Reavers is the fourth strongest guild right now. The strongest mage is also part of this guild, but they're dangerous! I heard a lot of rumors about the top guilds not being on good terms between them. Why do you want to join them?!" he spoke so fast that I had trouble understanding half of his words; everything aggravated by his nervousness.

"Relax, Joey. I'm extremely curious to know them. And since you've come all the way here with me, why don't you give it a try?" I suggested.

"But-"

Joey stopped his speech as soon as a girl emerged from the very building we were about to enter. She wore a black capelet adorned with the Abyss Reavers' insignia, holding a wooden staff in her hand. She was unmistakably a member of the guild. No one had ever given me such an impression from the very beginning; however, it was not her robe that impressed me, nor the aura she emanated, but rather the enormous hat on her head. It was so unnecessarily big that it appeared comical. In contrast, she looked very young and petite. I had trouble maintaining my facade.

"I thought I saw someone arguing outside our door..." she remarked, her tone seemed quite haughty. "What business do you have here?" she interrogated; she was clearly looking down on us.