I wanted to try out more sins so I could squeeze more powers out of the crown, but the Steves reminded me I had somewhere to be. On the battlefield fighting monsters that threatened the fate of humanity, not playing around with a new toy. Well, not a new toy, but a toy nonetheless.

Fredericka, Gilbert, and I teleported to the Nevada desert somewhere between Las Vegas and the mass of abyssal creatures. My army of demons and hellhounds arrived soon after. As we waited for the monstrosities to meet us, I thought back on dancing with Nimby.

Why did I do that? What was I thinking? Margaret was the love of my life and I only ever had eyes for her. I had no interest in a girl who couldn't even legally drink fire water yet.

She was thirty years old, to be clear. She wasn't eighteen at least. I hadn't stooped that low. That said, thirty years old in demon years was nothing. Margaret was in her sixties and she was still considered young by demon standards.

Getting back on topic, while the dance and the dip were exciting and all, that wasn't something Dave did. That wasn't a Dave move at all. Dave was a responsible adult heading into middle age. Dave didn't take risks. Dave didn't party. Those days were behind him.

What was he doing? It had to be the crown. It had to be. I was all out of sorts. I was even talking about myself in the third person. Who does that? Certainly not Dave. Ah! Stop it, me!

How was I going to handle this going forward? I had to indulge in sinful mental states to activate the powers that would allow me to save the world, which was a good thing. However, indulging too much led to poor decisions. What was I going to do?

This was something I would have to deal with at another time, because I saw movement on the horizon. The abyssal creatures were here. They came in all shapes and sizes. Some looked humanoid, some looked like animals, and some just looked gross. I saw one that was a weird amalgamation of arms and legs.

Three massive creatures brought up the rear of the group. One was swimming through the sand like it was water. Actually, on closer inspection, it was swimming through water. When its body made contact with the land, it transformed into water that the huge creature swam through.

Another creature walked along the ground, taking large earth shuddering steps that created vibrations in the ground under my feet, even though it was miles away. The third massive creature flew through the air on vast wings that made up over two-thirds of the size of its body. From this far away, I couldn't make out distinct features. I would learn more about them as they got closer.

All the abyssal creatures, giant and small alike, were black and oily, like the fabric of the Abyss had coated them in its essence. Maybe it had. Just because it was an abyss didn't mean it had to be clean. The walls and floor—if an abyss could have those—were probably covered in the stuff.

I wondered if it burned. I was about to find out. I was at the head of the demon army and the abyssal creatures were quickly closing the distance between us. I thought I should probably make a speech before that happened.

I turned around and looked at the thousand men and women at my command. They were demons, of course, but men and women regardless. Their red skin shone in the sun. Many of them had never been to Earth before. This was a lot of their first times.

I hated that this had to be their first time visiting Earth because, for many of them, it would also be their last. Their families would be fairly compensated for their losses, but that didn't make it right or fair. Now that I was thinking about it, I wondered why none of heaven's armies of angels were here to fight by our sides.

If my people were risking their lives, it would only be fair for them to do the same. Angels had it easy. They could re-compile and come back after death. Demons didn't have that same luxury. Sure, they had the Underworld to retire in and live eternally there, but it was still an end of life and a separation from all the people they loved.

I wondered how being a fallen angel affected Samael. I guessed since he mentioned his brothers being "killed" by Azrael, that fallen angels didn't have access to the re-compilation process. Where then did they go when they died?

While I had many questions, I had very little time, so I focused back on the army of demons before me. "Everyone! Today we will face an enemy the likes of which no one has ever known! Some of you may die. Some of you may cry. That's ok."

Something strange happened as I spoke. My voice amplified, and I could tell that each and everyone of the demons heard and understood what I was saying. I checked the crown inside me and the bronze jewel was lit up.

That must have been another communication ability of the domination jewel. Domination was such a strange thing to call something that simply allowed me to communicate with and persuade people. It felt like I was missing something, but I didn't have time to think too hard on that.

"Today will be a sad day in the annals of demon history, but we will be victorious! For those of you that survive, you have my sympathy. There is very little worse than being the one who survived when your friends did not. For those of you that don't survive, you have my respect and my love. Not to get too mushy, but I love each and everyone of you for volunteering your lives for this cause! Now, let's go kick some ass!"

Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

They all raised their pitchforks and whips in the air while crying out, "Yeah!"

Turning back to the oncoming horde of abyssal creatures, I hopped onto Fredericka, gave Gilbert a meaningful look, and kicked my heels. "Hiya!"

"Yes, master! We shall run at the scary monsters!" Fredericka yelled in my mind.

I looked back at Gilbert, the lich necromancer in deep purple robes, knowing that anything I said, no matter how far away I was, he would hear. "See you on the other side! I hope you get your... you know... back after the regeneration!"

"Thanks! Me too!" Gilbert nodded his head since he couldn't smile. I really hoped he was able to regenerate his whole body, including that particular part. After today, he would have more than earned it.

Turning back to the battlefield, I got my backpack off my back and started pulling out gravity wells. I activated them one at a time and, using my super strength, threw them hundreds of yards into the horde of monsters. They sucked the monsters into clusters that made them easier to hit for the demon soldiers with their pitchfork beams.

After I had run out of gravity wells, I pulled out the laser discs. Once activated, they shot out a 360 degree horizontal red laser blade. They were designed to shoot in the direction thrown and hover a few feet above the ground so they could hit the center mass of most humanoid targets.

With the heights of the abyssal creatures being so variable, they might not always hit center mass, but even if they missed that, they would still cut off some legs and arms and heads. I threw each disc out into the mass of creatures and watched the discs slice them to pieces as they went.

Now that my backpack full of artillery was depleted, I threw it aside and pulled out sword Steve. I still had some ball traps strapped to my legs and body, but the heavy artillery was gone.

I had taken out and disabled several hundred monsters with those weapons, but there were still plenty more left. We met the line of monsters and barreled through them, Fredericka impaling them with her black spiral horn. I swung sword Steve, cutting down dozens of them as we passed.

I decided to head towards the largest targets, knowing that my demon army would struggle the most with them. I figured if I took out the toughest enemies, I would lose the least of my troops. And I hated delivering bad news to families and lifelong partners of the fallen.

I made it a point to deliver the news personally to each and every family of troops that died in my service. Speaking of, I had many families to visit already from all the demon deals that had been broken and absorbed by Cain. I didn't need to add a thousand more to the list.

We approached our first major target. The giant serpent that I could only guess was known as Leviathan. Leviathan was mentioned in the bible as being a giant serpent and a dragon of the sea. God tasked Job with capturing it once, but it was far too mighty for even for Job and escaped.

It was never stated in the Bible that Leviathan was imprisoned in the Abyss, but the massive creature before me fit the description of it as it was mentioned in the Bible. It looked like a huge serpent with multiple finned heads that swam through water that it created beneath its body by transforming the ground.

Compared to me, it had to be thousands of times larger. Like all the other creatures of the Abyss, it was covered in a black oily substance that I hoped to find out was flammable soon. I would have to dismount from Fredericka to activate my hellfire powers. I didn't have the ability to keep the flames from covering my body yet, and I didn't want to test whether they would burn Fredericka alive or not.

The other two giant creatures were far enough away from us to not be able to immediately interfere in our battle, but I would need to keep my eyes on them in case they decided to move toward us.

"Who is this tiny creature that challenges me, the mighty Leviathan?" Leviathan said, in a booming, but gravelly voice.

"I am called Dave! It is I who challenges you! I will spare you if you just go back into the Abyss!" I yelled.

"That, I cannot do. You don't know what it is like down there. The amount of creatures who have touched me in places I didn't want to be touched is countless. Some of them even slid inside me. Both ways," Leviathan said, pain evident in its voice.

"Both ways? Are you female?" I asked.

"No," he said.

"Then how? Men only have the one hole down there as far as I know," I said, confused. What was he talking about?

"No. Males have two holes. You're just not thinking about the other one because nothing is supposed to go inside there," he said, closing his eyes.

I thought about it. And thought about it. And then I realized what he meant. "Oh! That's awful!" I said, shaking my head, trying to get the image out of my mind. "I'm so sorry! You still need to go back! I can't have you killing innocent people!"

"I won't. I just want to make it to the sea," he said.

"Oh. I can do that for you," I said.

"You can?" he asked.

"Yeah. I can teleport myself and others. I can just teleport you to the ocean. As long as you promise not to attack or harm humans," I said, wagging my finger at him.

"I promise! I just can't go back to the Abyss. Anything but that! My bladder is still irritated from the many many violations," he said.

"Ok, ok! You don't have to go into anymore detail! I get it! I'll take you to the ocean. You just have to let me touch your hide briefly," I said.

"Ok. I consent to this," he said, relief in his voice.

I got off Fredericka and said, "Stay here. I'm going to take him to the ocean."

"Yes, master, sir," Fredericka said, nodding her head.

I spread my demon wings and flew up to Leviathan's massive body. I pressed my hand against his slick hard scales and imagined us in the middle of the Pacific ocean.

We teleported to the ocean. I watched as Leviathan happily swam through the sea. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" he said.

"You're welcome! Just remember your promise!" I yelled, cupping my hands around my mouth.

"Yes, of course. I will harm no humans. Thank you again. I will never forget this! I presume you have to go back to that dreadful battle. Goodbye!" he said, disappearing under the water.

"Goodbye!" I yelled. I truly wished him the best. I was glad I was able to do at least one kind thing today. Especially one that would be marred by so much death.

Then I teleported back to the battlefield. The sky and ground were dark. I looked up to see a massive foot coming down on me.