After finishing up Eve’s door, I wove in an enchantment into the tunnel that made it extremely slippery. It would make descending into the boss room easier and funnier, I could already picture anyone stepping into the tunnel being utterly flabbergasted as their foot suddenly lost footing and slid away.

I didn’t want them to be hurt by my antics though, only the boss so I spun out a cloud of soul essence and wove it into thick and glowing threads. After that, I sent them into the wood of the tunnel with my intent. This would absorb the force from any fatal slip ups.

With my business concluded on the second floor, I moved on to the first. I replicated the same setup I did on the second on my door entrance. But I removed the cross-referencing thing and changed up the enchantment a little. I shaped a serpent to be the speaker instead of Eve, since I already had stone serpents at my door, so why not?

Instead of a cup I used a large wide stone basin with the same enchantments. I made its texture smooth and pleasant to the touch, hopefully. I always ended up getting these things wrong. I also added a bit more texture and life to my door as well, a few fake cracks here and there, a jagged crack there, it felt good and when I was done it looked properly ancient.

Now for the fun part!

I switched on the recorder for me only and spoke the greeting message.

“Hark! Tread through the threshold of this infinite oubliette! Within its labyrinthine depths, fearsome trials await, yet treasures untold slumber there as well!”

Fun! I bet they’ll be confused as hell by what I mean, and that’s fair, only I know the meaning of these words but it wouldn’t be hard to figure out that I meant come in, but there’s risks and rewards.

Next I moved to the offering recording.

“Ere you venture forth, a tithe is demanded by the blessed one, for fortune's wheel spins both ways. Cast thine offering upon the hallowed font, and fate shall decide.”

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And finally the last three warning messages.

“Lay not a sacrilegious hand upon the blessed one, for thine demise shall be swift and terrible!”

“Desist! Lest the wrath of the hallowed one be unleashed upon thee!”

“Taste oblivion!”

If the last message was ever spoken the two stone serpents would come alive and target whoever was attempting to damage the door specifically. If it was a group of offenders their power would be adjusted accordingly.

Business done I moved within my first floor and used the same setup but with Kölgə’s face and voice for the speaker and a stone version of his claw upscaled a lot more for the offering holder. As usual, I always enjoyed the recording part.

I tried to do my best impression of a zealot minion for this too.

“Ha! Wretches who dare trespass! Cower before the herald of the blessed one! What meager tribute do you bring to appease the ground upon which the holy one treads?”

I decided that I would be using archaic terms and words going forward for anything like this simply because it sounds so different and for some reason I knew a shit ton of them.

After taking the recording a little more so it sounded exactly like the boss himself I moved on to the warning recordings.

“By the hallowed bones! Desecration! Dost thou defile the very threshold blessed by the holy one's touch? Thy insolence shall be visited with righteous fury! The very air shall crackle with the divine wrath you've invoked! KAKAKAKA! Tremble, mortals, for your end is nigh!”

“Desist, heathens! The herald of the blessed one brings word of your imminent demise! Your flesh shall be offered to the purifying flame, your bones ground to dust to nourish the hallowed soil, and your very mind consumed by the unholy light! KAKAKAKA! Rejoice, for your suffering shall pave the way for the holy one's dominion!”

“Perish, interlopers! Your fleeting life essence is forfeit to the will of the blessed one!”

The claw of Kölgə’s will come alive for the last one, plunging though anything that was trying to harm the door. If it was a group it would split into the adequate amount and attack. After that was done I moved into his room and carved fake runes and claws onto bits of the wall.

I lost myself in a trance there, and when I became lucid again there was an intricate, almost lifelike carving depicting a battle. I vaguely recalled what happened. Kölgə was fighting guild master Bob, but instead of being human he was a twisted blue mass of flesh and horns with claws, the only reason I knew it was him was because of his face that was hanging loosely from a random flesh growth.

Huh, that was odd, I was definitely onto something here, I made a mental note to come look at it later, after I was done.

With the strange experience at the back of my mind I moved to the door leading to the second floor and spruced it up a little, then I moved to the spiral staircase and did the same, I added railings too. I wove in an enchantment that would make them very durable and made them out of dungeon stone.

After that I wove in an enchantment that would occasionally make a random step break and fall below, I also wove in an enchantment that would make the railing shift backward, as if it came loose.

Hehehe, I’m such a troll but my need for entertainment must be met. At the bottom of the staircase I wove an enchantment that would absorb most of the force if anyone was incompetent enough to fall over because of my antics.

It wouldn’t cushion the fall entirely, but they wouldn’t die, they’d be a bit shaken up but that was nothing, a healing potion couldn't fix it.