30 - A moment of peace

“Kalester City is in ruins. Three million people have died, three times as many are displaced.

More than half the Council Archmages have died.

The economic devastation is sending shockwaves across the whole Refuge, and hundred of millions find themselves in poverty.

Where the Black Liar died, the shadow of his power poisons the world and weakens the Veil - it’s now a wasteland of demons and darkness.

And yet, this is what victory looks like.

The price was terrible. But we’ve shown that the Alliance has the strength and the will to act against its enemies, both mundane and magical.

Some ask me how I can live with what I’ve done. The answer is: proudly. Because I’ve sworn to uphold the One World Alliance and to fight the Moonbreakers.

The war is over. There’s still only one Alliance, and of the Three Traitors, there is only one left.”

- General Tholon, supreme commander of the One World Alliance forces, year 2752.

It’s still strange, for me, to wake up at home, next to a friend.

Well, for some value of home. This is a flat our fake identities are renting from some kind of magical super criminal. It still feels like home.

And for some value of friend. Korentis is either Else-touched, or so unreliable by nature that xe might as well be. Xe’s whiny, entitled, impulsive and egocentric.

I still count xem as a friend.

I look at xem, sleeping curled up in xir duvet, next to mine. Xe has the darkest hair and the whitest skin I’ve ever seen, xe looks like one of those black-and-white pictures Iketek likes. It’s strange to see xem still - Kore is always moving, talking, fidgeting when xe’s awake. Watching xem sleep is like watching fire lay still.

I could reach with my arm and touch xem. I can imagine, with painful clarity, how it would feel to roll closer to xem and put my arm over xir shoulders. Could I do that and pretend I did it in my sleep? I mean, it might happen, right?

Abyss, I’m being a creep. And Korentis doesn’t like being touched.

I roll out of the duvet and wear a red tunic - the fabric is soft and smooth, because for once I could afford new, decent-quality clothes. I try to be silent, but only half-heartedly, Korentis is a heavy sleeper.

I cast xem a final glance as I leave the room. For a moment, I consider waiting until xe wakes up - Korentis is a bit of a prude, but in the morning xe’s too groggy with sleep to care, and xe takes ages to get dressed, so I get a nice show of xem in underwear. Oh, Exiled, burn me, I’m a creep, and pathetic too.

I go to the bathroom and splash my face with cold water, mostly trying to get my mind off my roommate’s body.

I have it bad for xem, don’t I? I’ll have to deal with that at some point. Or ride it out. I’m good at squashing feelings down.

Do I like Korentis because… well, because xe’s hot and funny and smart and lively and gave me a gift worth thirty thousand credits? Those sound like pretty good reasons, if I spell them out.

But there’s the other possibility - or do I like xem because xe’s the first person who doesn’t treat me like shit?

It’s not like everyone treated me badly, back in the caravan. But as an orphan adopted into the clan, I was at the bottom of every possible pecking order. Even when I made friends, most of them treated it like a concession. They expected gratitude for it. I would never dare contradict my few friends, or ask anything of them.

Korentis, despite being from an ungodly rich family and having the scariest kind of magic imaginable at xir disposal, doesn’t do that. Xe truly doesn’t care about status - if anything, I think xe has a youngest sibling complex, xe’s more than happy to follow anyone who looks vaguely responsible.

I finish washing myself, walk into the kitchen and start making myself a cocoa cup. We made the room quite cozy - well, I made it cozy, but I’m the only one with too much free time.

A house of my own, shared with people I actually like. Nice clothes, a lazy breakfast. That’s much more than I thought I’d ever get in life. And all it took was accepting to steal a bauble.

I unroll a mat, put the cocoa cup on the table and try to enjoy it, but my stomach has clenched.

I know, deep in my bones, that things can’t be so easy. The easy job that settles you for life never, ever works like that.

It’s not like I was a big time criminal, before magic. I only did side jobs - since my presence in Vorok was illegal anyway, there was no point staying on the right side of the law. But sometimes people tried to tempt me with bigger stuff - do this one thing and you’ll be rich, you’ll be adopted into the clan, you’ll be in favor with the people that matter.

I’ve seen what happens to the people who accept. They end up doing more jobs, they end up more and more involved with dangerous people, until they disappear, or end up in jail, or dead.

This job has blatant red flags, too. We don’t know who the client is. We don’t know why they want the Twisting Tetrathingie. And I keep thinking about Iketek’s stories about the Sacred Song Syndicate. Mages are a whole different category of dangerous people.

As my brain starts providing a convenient list of all the horrible things a Syndicate mage could do to us, Iketek walks into the room. She wears a long black tunic with golden accents. I’m not really into the femme look, all my horniness is used up for Korentis, but I still catch myself staring as she walks into the kitchen like some model making a grand entrance.

How did I end up sharing a house with these people? Why am I even here? Like, there are two incredibly attractive people with grand ambitions and world-bending powers, and there’s me. I like shopping for furniture and I can break stuff.

“Have you practiced your Lies?” Iketek asks. She’s not one for chit-chat.

“Good morning to you, too,” I answer.

“It’s painfully obvious that you’re avoiding the issue,” she answers.

I look down, feeling myself blush.

“But look how good I’m getting at Juggling apples,” I answer. I Reach into the Else, and the world becomes like dark red glass, criss-crossed by brighter lines. Flaws running through all things, where matter wants to break.

Living things are full of flaws, they’re like snarls of brighter thread in the dark red of inanimate matter. It’s easy to find the apples, and I do what I learned recently - instead of tearing the flaws open, I pull at them carefully, picking them one by one, until I can tug at the flaws and move the apples, instead of tearing them apart.

“Look, now I can make them spin and…”

Golden light flares in the Else, and for a split second I see Iketek like a golden statue. A crack splits her face in the middle.

Twisting threads of light, like vines, spread from her fingers and wrap around the apples I’m Juggling. It’s like the apples suddenly become enormously heavy - by instinct, I pour more power to keep them afloat, but it’s like trying to feel a bottomless well. My fingers hurt, as I Channel too much power, and I lose control over the spell, finding myself thrust back into the Material.

In front of me, Iketek has a stony expression, and her eyes glow gold.

A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

Black Liar’s ass, was that necessary? Does she enjoy reminding me that she’s so much better than me?

Fury courses through me, so sudden and strong it’s like being thrust in a river of fire. I look at the cocoa mug and think I could throw it at her, see how well she keeps that stony face when it gets splattered with scalding liquid, or I could reach back into the Else, seek the flaws in her and…

Breathe. Deep breaths. That’s what you do with anger - you stay very still and breathe and do nothing, until you can think, until you can speak without screaming.

“You behave like a child with boring homework,” Iketek says. “But this isn’t preparation for a quiz. You need to work on your Lies, and you’re clearly avoiding it. May I know the reason?”

Anger flares again - because even her insults reveal how fucking privileged her life was, I never had to worry about quizzes, since the last scattered schooling I got stopped at age ten, and no one ever bothered to give me homework. She may play the criminal, but she’s…

Breathe.

She’s right, of course.

Breathe.

She frowns, a hint of concern on her face now.

“Sorry,” she says, reluctantly. “My counterspell was rougher than needed. We should practice that, too. And you’re not my apprentice. You can practice with whatever path you see fit. I was merely trying to keep you focused on the necessities of the job.”

Breathe. Finally, I can speak.

“No, you’re right. It’s just that I didn’t expect it.”

I got way, way too angry. Like, I always got angry too easily. I learned very quickly, and harshly, not to show it. But I never really managed to make it go away.

It's more obvious, however, that my fits of anger are getting more extreme, and more easily triggered. I used to believe that was the price of dealing with Korentis. But the truth is, I get along with xem pretty well. And I’m still getting angry more and more often.

I’ll just have to deal with it like I always did - like they taught me. Stay still, and breathe, and wait for it to pass.

“I know I should work on my Lies,” I add. “It’s just that I can’t wrap my head around them. It makes me feel stupid, and I make zero progress, and that reminds me I’m completely useless for this job.”

Now that I started talking, it’s hard to stop.

“You needed a Liar for this job. That’s Korentis, not me,” I say. “Xe’s doing all the work and taking all the risk. I’m just… freeloading the two of you. If I train with other paths, at least it makes me think I could be useful one day. I’m getting everything I wanted, and I’m doing nothing for it.”

I feel a burst of shame for admitting it - my feelings are stupid and tangled and contradictory, things are going too well for me, I don’t deserve this, but also, disaster is sure to strike, and I can’t do anything about it. I’m not supposed to tell other people this kind of stuff. My problems are my own.

To my surprise, Iketek seems to mollify after my words. Her face doesn’t show emotion, but her shoulders relax a fraction, and she finally sits down in front of me.

“I don’t know if this will be helpful,” she says, “but you should consider that without your help, Korentis would have been caught weeks ago. Or would have managed to kill xemself in some other way. Your partnership is obviously benefiting you both. And truth to be told, I don’t think Korentis considers your relationship in transactional terms anyway.”

It takes me a moment to decode her sentence. Iketek likes her big words. But I’m pretty sure she’s saying Korentis doesn’t care if xe’s doing all the work, because xe sees me as a friend, not a business partner.

Wow. That makes an even worse tangled mess of my feelings.

“Can’t we do something more to help Korentis when xe’ll go into the Vault? I don’t know, create a diversion?”

She shakes her head, but doesn’t laugh me off.

“I gave the issue some consideration,” she says. “When I picked you and Korentis for this job, I expected we would work together on it. But Korentis’ skill with lies is such that the safest course of action, I believe, is to let xem infiltrate the Vault alone. As for a diversion, or any other attempt to weaken security, it would be likely to have the opposite effect - despite the facts Valanes, so far the University of Rakavdon has no specific reason to worry about magical attacks. Any course of action that risks alerting them, or ThauCon, would put the mission - and Korentis - in danger.”

She’s right, of course. And I knew it. And what’s worst, a part of me feels relieved - the best thing I can do to help is stay home, fuck around and go shopping while Korentis risks xir life.

“I understand and share your frustration, rational or not,” Iketek adds. “That’s part of why I’ve been rather… intensive… with my effort to teach you two magic. It’s something I can dedicate myself to, and it can’t worsen our position. My other efforts - for example, understanding more about the local magical factions - risk being counterproductive.”

“The local magical factions?” I ask. “I thought you said there’s no one here.”

“There’s no overt presence of any faction,” she explains. “Which is an anomaly in itself. After that strange fight at the train station, I had hoped to learn something more, but an investigation, no matter how careful, always risks revealing the investigator themselves. So I had to stop my inquiries.”

She didn’t tell us she was investigating the train station, she just said she had ‘business to attend’. But before I get annoyed, I realize something more important - there is something I can do to help.

Would it endanger Korentis? No, I don’t see how. But xe and Iketek probably wouldn’t be happy about my plan, and if they tried to help, they’d ruin everything.

“Uh, thanks for the chat,” I say, suddenly itching to move. I look at my phone, as if checking the time. “I meant to go out before rush hour, I think I’ll browse the flea market for some furniture - do you need anything?”

Iketek looks at me, dead in the eye, and sighs.

“While it’s not my intention to invade your mental privacy,” she says, “as I pointed out many times, I literally can’t avoid being aware of lies, and there’s no need to give me any explanation when you leave the house, so in the future, I suggest you just say ‘I’m leaving, because of my own fucking reasons’, and avoid unnecessary friction.”

I wince. That was stupid of me. Also, when Iketek swears, it sounds so unnatural it makes me cringe.

“Sorry, it’s just that I… uh…”

Why can’t I have one percent of Korentis’ ability to make up bullshit?

I decide to tell her the truth, but I want to make it sound not-stupid, and I’m trying to find the right words for once, and now I feel like a huge idiot, but she stops me with a gesture.

“I’m confident you’re not going to harm us, or our mission, on purpose,” she says. “I know for a fact that you take our agreement seriously, and it’s painfully obvious you’d never risk harming Korentis, since you’re, inexplicably, in love with xem.”

My mouth freezes open, and now I’m blushing furiously and sweating. Did she read that in my mind? No, I’m probably just that transparent.

To my surprise, Iketek laughs. It’s strange, because she doesn’t smile, so she just goes from dead serious to rolling her head back in laughter.

“Sorry, it just seemed fair to reciprocate your sharing of unnecessary information,” she says. “In case you were wondering, I didn’t exactly read your mind, but I felt your emotions back at the Moonbreaker, and they were about ninety-five percent lust. Plus, you look like a sad kitten every time Korentis leaves the house. Anyway, I don’t care what your secret errand is, it’s probably some terrible idea I’ll be happier not knowing. You may go.”

***

My plan isn’t that grand. I’m not a grand plan kind of person, that’s why I was a petty thief and not a magical supercriminal like Iketek.

It’s just that checking social media - anonymously, of course - a few days ago, I learned that a friend of mine has come to Rakavdon.

She’s one of very few people from the caravans which I’d call a friend. She embarked my same airship as a stowaway when we were twelve, and while the Merchant allowed her to stay onboard, she was the only one who ranked even below me.

She fared much better than me, though. Partly because she was far more willing to take illegal, dangerous jobs. She changed caravan when we were sixteen, but we’ve met a couple of times since then, and she was very friendly everytime. Usually, she tried to get me to follow her.

I check the texts from my new burner phone.

Druvin: I can’t believe it’s really you. Aren’t you dead to the world? I’ve been pestering everyone since you disappeared, and no one could tell me shit.

Uh. So, she had noticed? I found a few threads about myself in the kalestran community datasphere - one about my disappearance, one about ThauCon asking about me - but the Eich-Kal clan answered both with a chilly Daravoi is no longer aboard our ships, and he’s no longer affiliated with the clan.

Anon: I’ll tell you everything. Well, I’ll tell you some things. Lunch at the Long Bridge Burger?

I’ve learned from my own mistakes. I trust Druvin way more than Zerkon - the acquaintance who tried to sell me to bounty hunters - but I’m still picking a place well known for being neutral grounds. If she called ThauCons, or bounty hunters, to the Long Bridge Burger, she’d be dead to the Kalestran community. And probably also dead, in general.

Druvin: anonymous account, unlinked phone, and a meeting at Long Bridge! You’ve finally stopped being boring. I knew you had it in you.

Anon: I’m as boring as ever. But I run with an interesting crowd.

Did she get word that ThauCon is looking for me? Or did she get the story of how I left the caravan? If so, she’ll know - or strongly suspect - that I’m a mage.

Druvin: You’re not with the Teraich shits, right? Because I’d have to shoot you. And that would spoil the mood, so just tell me and I’ll forget about you.

The Teraich Family - one of the Syndicates in the new Cartel. The one involved in the train station fight, if Iketek has it right. So, she does know. And even better, my hunch was right - if regular gangs are battling the Cartels, she may know something about what is happening in the city.

Anon: I said interesting, not evil. I’m not with the Syndicates!

Is that fully true, though? We don’t know who our mysterious buyer is. Well, that’s another thing I hope to find out. You can’t go around offering millions for a heist without attracting some attention, after all.

***