Chapter Thirty-Seven

It was a flurry of activity, both my people’s and the Earth ambassador were more than a little anxious about this unknown ‘rogue’ element that had somehow been welcomed to Earth. But if Bonny Red held any particular feelings about their perspective, she definitely did not show it. Instead she went along with us every step of the way as if she was supposed to be there.

I think she was prepared to answer press questions all day, but she only got to answer a few.

“Did you have a favorite pirate movie?”

“Aye, C’pn Jack ‘Arrow!”

“Are you a pirate?”

“I be a fortune seeker sail’n the void. I never attack ships, but if’n a ship comes an strikes me first, a little compensatory coin may find its way inna me pockets! That’s just fair compensation fer me trouble though.” Bonny patted the leather coinpurse at her side, it jingled, she had actual bits of metal in there, though almost certainly not currency in the form pirates thought of it, she probably had the little credit transfer drives for energy reallocation.

“Where’d you get your clothes?” That question came from a hovering drone emblazoned with a lot of different wild colors over it, I couldn’t begin to imagine what agency it belonged to.

She stepped beside the podium and struck a pose with her arms up to show off every line. “I had it made fer me custom by a pioneer human living offworld. Ye be makin quite a name fer yeselves out there beyond the void.”

But even though I think she was willing to spend all day chattering, the ambassadors of two worlds were not prepared to let this rogue element go on longer than they had to in order to keep up appearances.

They approached together to present a unified front. “Thank you for your interest in our people, truly her courage and openness is an inspiration to us all. But the journey was long and dangerous, and… Captain Bonny Red… not to mention her crew, must be exhausted.” My ambassador said first, only to immediately move aside to allow his human counterpart to take center stage. I could see from his sweating face that he was throwing away a well prepared speech and adapting to the moment to get the unexpected out of there before anything crazy happened.

“And there are formal matters to attend to. I must take her from you but… thank you all for this truly historic occasion.” He then approached Captain Bonny Red and held out his hand.

She smacked her hand hard into his and shook it with vigor, the two of them looking toward the cameras to provide a fine and immortal display that would be in museums after everybody around us, human and dlamisa alike, were turned to dust and ash. Long after Percival’s little tree was stretched up to the sky, this moment would linger on.

‘I wish he were around to provide good advice… I’m sure he’d know how to make this work.’ I was fretting, I knew it. Bonny at least seemed very enthusiastic about humans, and that worked in my favor, but on the downside of this, enthusiasm without knowledge was a ship without a captain.

Bonny for her part, had the sense to go along with the two officials saying, “Send yer customs folk in to inspect me ship, nothin thar to hide, an me mates all know what’s com’n.”

That was all it took for word to get passed on and customs officials who had frankly never really had to do anything like this before, soon streamed out of a nearby building, there were dozens of them in bright blue skintight uniforms, no pockets, and hair cut close or shaved entirely clean. They were almost as perfectly uniform as some swarm species, but I knew why.

Not every human is a good one, and thieves, while not the worst of the worst, exist. As such, they kept the human uniforms done in such a way that nobody could steal anything from a newcomer to Earth.

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They carried a series of small metal suitcases, I knew well enough even without asking, what those were for. The first ship to land on Earth had been who knew where, as such, they had to check for any possible disease, disinfect, and inspect for contraband, up to and including trafficking of any kind. Manifests had to match, as did cargo and other material, anything could wreak havoc if it was an unknown. No pets, no ‘ship mascots’ not even any plants or other creatures.

Privately I considered cross contamination to be nearly inevitable. ‘Ants get into every damn thing.’ I thought about the one I found crawling in my fur despite having taken a shower. But every world engaging in the transport of goods and people alike had measures like this.

But for the moment at least, all was well.

I will spare the reader the details of assigning quarters, as it turned out, Bonny Red’s crew was not very large, only three hundred strong compared to the nine hundred we were expecting.

However, there was one problem.

“Me ship be badly damaged an' will take several months to repair. Every male an' female on me crew been in the void a long time, an' they want shore leave ‘fore we set sail again. I can cover their wages no problem. An' they can sleep on the ship if they need to, but I be no fool. This here be a new world, an' they need to know 'ow to act. Any one o' em turns crook, I've already told them, I won't 'elp. Ye 'ang em from the mast if ye want, make them walk the plank or whatever ye do. None o' me crew be allowed to mess with 'umans.” Bonny promised us when we sat down around the table.

Fauve stood back, still oggling the piratish looking dlamisan ship captain like she’d met a new idol. I was, I admit, jealous.

“Where is the other ship supposed to land when it gets here?” Our ambassador asked his human counterpart, “If this one is here for months…”

It wasn’t a minor problem, the preparations for alien landings hadn’t been done world wide, even though the landing places were all built, all the equipment for guiding a ship weren’t operational, and inspection crews specially trained in xenoship inspection and decontamination were rarer than feathers on fish.

“We can train new crews, and the landing port off the coast outside of New Kyoto is the nearest to completion. If we need to, we can keep your cargo ship docked in space and just make runs with smaller cargo vessels and the elevator system to fill your holds. It’s not what we planned…I know.” The human ambassador said as gently as he could, clearly he and my people’s ambassador had spent ample time together, at least enough for the former to know how uncomfortable things going off script made us.

“And what about how to feed a crew of nine hundred? Can your station do that for months?” Our ambassador asked.

“With some ground support, yes. It may be a lot of dry rations instead of fresh food, but we’ll manage. And if they want to land for a week of rest and relaxation after, then the ship can land here, or if New Kyoto’s facilities are staffed and ready, there will be fine too. Maybe we can even see our way to handing a few cases of champagne to your embassy as a show of thanks for your patience while we get this sorted out.” The promise of backup plans and hospitality, not to mention supplies and the possibility of gifts was enough to set my own at ease.

It was the first mistake I’d ever seen humans make, at least of that sort. The wrong ship landed, and their government had given it welcome. Of course I later realized that this solidified the favorable view of humans held by many other species. ‘If you are in danger, go for a human colony.’ Their hosting tendencies that I had written of so favorably before, were on full display here.

“That all sounds…fine.” He finally muttered, but I could see from the wagging of his tail, as could the rest of us, that he was more eager for that champagne than he wanted to admit.

It was then that Bonny Red spoke up, “Oh, an' ambassador, we've got one extra body on board who doesn't plan on leavin' with us. A passenger if ye can believe it. From the 'omeworld, no less. She'll need papers from ye so she can stay, an if’n she can’t, then she’ll need a way offworld, ye plan on deportin' 'er. I don’t mind, but I goin' to 'ave to charge ye ten thousand times what it cost to brin' 'er.”

It was the price, more than the passenger, that caused us all dismay.

“T-T-T-Ten thousand times?!” It wasn’t us who spoke up, but Fauve who could hardly believe it. She might have been criticized for it, or asked to leave, but she was echoing our sentiment.

“Aye lass, the liquor I come here for… well, it’s worth more credits’n you can count. I plan on fillin my ship to the brink with every bottle an brew we can carry. I got no room for a passenger what goin’ta cost me money.” Bonny Red gave a vigorous shake of her head.

“Then why did you take her on and bring her here?!” My ambassador seethed and Bonny cocked her head at him as if he were a dunce.

“On account’a she paid me.” Bonny replied like he was the thickest of our kind.

“Welcome to Earth.” Fauve said matter of factly, and nobody was going to tell her she was wrong in what she meant.