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Accidental Artificer
Chapter 17 V2: Tooth and Nail

Chapter 17 V2: Tooth and Nail

After taking out the elite goblin I walked slowly toward the next set of rooms. Coming up next on the left was the row of three rooms where I had taken my meal break last time, and where both of my guns had jammed. I was weary about recreating that experience. I still had three of the four flashbangs left in my vest, but I wanted to save those. I decided instead on using the Gem Obscurement, which had been riding along in my pocket all this time. The room was instantly shrouded in the pitch black aura, and I walked in.

The goblins stumbled around in the dark, bumping into each other and nearly coming to blows as they screamed in confusion. The hobgoblins however calmly weaved through the half dozen goblins, coming right toward me.

I still didn’t know if they could just naturally see in the dark, or had sensed me by some other means, but either way they needed to go down first. Two rounds into the chest of each of them did the job, and the goblins went into an absolute frenzy, flailing around wildly. I decided not to waste the ammo, and my blade made quick work of them while I walked to the next room. It was just as empty as last time, but from there I could see the three orcs lingering through the next door.

“Hey fuckhead! I’m over here!”

The three of them fought for a moment to get through the door first, giving me time to step back into the darkness. One of them finally won the right to enter first, and he charged into the darkness after me. The blade was waiting for him, and he skewered his own neck on it. The next two tripped over his corpse as they ran in, and I plunged my ka-bar into the back of one’s neck while my blade punched the other in the heart until he stopped moving.

I gathered up my XP gems, and found no gold at all.

Gained 25 Soul Energy, 152/115

After that, I walked toward the last room, and to my growing annoyance I found no chests there. “Bullshit!” I declared to the ceiling, and I began ranting into the air about the dungeon’s unfairness. There were several insinuations about its parentage, its propensity for being a prostitute, and a few remarks about its lack of bitches. Yes, I know, I was upset ok?

All that remained between me and the big boss’s room was the fountain rest area, and the angler fish’s chamber. I was planning to take full advantage of the fountain this time, because my Aura really needed the recharge. Despite knowing this room was supposed to be safe, my eyes were still glued to the ceiling as I approached the stone fixture, and I only relaxed when the calming and reinvigorating aura washed over me.

I sat down and leaned my head against the cool stone of the water fixture, listening to the trickling of the water, and letting the warmth seep into my bones.

Aura: 75%

Stamina: 100/100

And then suddenly the aura was gone, leaving me alone in the chilly dungeon air, and upset that it was cut short like season one of a promising show. It appeared that it only lasted about half an hour, which was incredibly stingy of it (in my opinion). That meant I’d either have to face the angler without a full Aura, or wait for another twenty or so minutes for it to refill naturally. I hate waiting.

I stopped at the door to the angler’s room and reloaded my rifle with the AP filled magazine. I wasn’t going in unprepared like last time.

It had taken me by total surprise, attacking from above like that, because who expects aerial attacks in a dungeon? I had only forty rounds of the good stuff to strip away its armor that time. This time, I had a hundred and twenty rounds and my blade to help with fending off the tendrils. I walked into the room slowly, watching the ceiling like a hawk. I dared it to try and ambush me this time.

I learned another harsh lesson in awareness that day. You see, it turns out that the angler does not exclusively live in the ceiling.

I had been so firm in my expectation that something was going to be coming down on me from above, that I didn’t watch what was going on down along the floor at all. Because of that, I had no time to react as one of its tendrils latched onto my ankle and whipped me right across the room. I crashed front first into the wall, with the barrel of my rifle smashing directly into the stone.

Even as I fell down to the floor I could already see that the barrel was bent almost twenty degrees to the right.

Aura: 20%

“You son of a fucking bitch!”

The clever bastard had popped out of the floor, wearing the fake fountain almost like a hat as its tendrils started lashing around in every direction, like it was taunting me. I drew my handgun and took aim at its body, firing twice and causing it to take shelter below the stone. The limbs whipped out at me, and my blade sliced right through one as it got near. With the appendage severed the creature began to shriek, and I cut another tendril clean off when it tried to grab onto me.

The bleeding angler pulled its two remaining tendrils below the floor to protect them from me. The stone panels that it used for body armor pressed flush with the rest of the floor.

“Oh no you don’t you little bastard, you don’t get to hide!”

I holsted my pistol and pulled off my rifle sling so I could set it to the side on the floor. Then I dropped my backpack and retrieved my trusty crowbar. I raised it high and stabbed downward, jamming the chisel tip between two of the panels and began to pry it upward. The creature’s shrieks of pain only intensified as I started tearing its armor away from its flesh, essentially skinning it alive. The moment I had a clear view of its actual body, my blade shot in and began stabbing and slashing away, carving its way in.

The two remaining tendril lashed out to fend me away, and one wrapped itself around my torso. I pinned it in place with my right arm and unsheathed my ka-bar with my left, and then I began sawing through the grappled appendage. It quickly cut free, and it sprayed blood as the severed piece flopped about. I didn’t bother unwrapping the piece around me, it began to dissolve rather quickly, and resumed my work prying up the next panel.

The final tendril was severed by my blade, and the angler had lost its last means to defend itself. With the next panel torn away, I found its mouth, and had a nefarious idea. I pulled a flashbang from my vest, primed it, and dropped it into the thing’s chomping mouth. It had not a clue in the world of what it had just swallowed, like a venus fly trap closing on a firecracker. It regretted its action soon enough.

I could only hear the muffled bang, but it's noises of distress took on a whole new level. Smoke billowed from its maw, and blood began pouring out. I decided I’d add to its stomach problems, as my blade flew into its open mouth and down its gullet. I gave it the order to do its best impression of a blender.

Two minutes passed, and its blood loss and internal organ damage still hadn’t finished it off yet. An idea came to me that I was feeling just vindictive enough to actually try. I got up and went to my backpack, fishing around inside until I found a gold nugget. I held it as I focused on the consumable Lesser Firebolt enchantment.

The story has been illicitly taken; should you find it on Amazon, report the infringement.

Piece of gold detected. Tier 1 material, small size. Required soul energy for enchantment equals 5. Requires 1 Mana

I was pleased to discover that the consumable nature of the enchantment lowered the SE requirement by half, of which I was thankful for.

Soul Energy 147/115

Mana: 0/3

Piece of gold has been enchanted! Would you like to name it?

Name: Fuck You

Confirm?

I held the newly sigil inscribed piece of gold in my hand and took aim at the exposed face of the angler, and willed a firebolt to launch at it. It seemed to realize what I was doing, and closed its mouth to prevent an internal shot, but its flesh still instantly ignited on impact. Lord, I tell you that the sounds it started to make when it was on fire was like an angelic choir to my ears. I might’ve recorded them to listen to again later if I had my phone on me.

Thirty seconds later the fire suddenly snuffed itself out, and despite its heavily charred skin the thing was still squirming.

So I hit it again.

Then a third for good measure.

The angler finally succumbed to its wounds as I was preparing to hit it with firebolt number four.

Fuck You

Charges 2/5

Launches a bolt of fire which ignites the target. Item is rendered useless after all charges are expended.

As the angler’s body was dissolving I pocketed the Fuck You nugget and walked over to my discarded rifle to finally inspect just how bad the damage was. Sure enough, the barrel was ruined. The handguard and gas block were fine, as was my foregrip and illumination device. Thankfully my expensive thermal optic was completely untouched. The lower receiver was similarly in perfect working order.

Getting a whole new upper assembly wouldn’t be cheap, but it was a far cry better than replacing the whole rifle. The biggest problem it presented was that now I was going to be facing the boss and his lackeys with a significant amount less firepower than last time. While I shoved the remains of my rifle into my backpack and reorganized everything to make it fit, I took stock of my armaments.

I had my Dancing Blade, my ka-bar, two flashbangs, fifty six rounds of 10mm JHP, and two charges of the Fuck You nugget. Fucking wonderful. I knew that my handgun would be useless against the boss, as it had shrugged off conventional rifle rounds until I’d mag dumped one piece repeatedly.

I sat everything to the side while I retrieved the XP gem and the stone key to the boss room.

Gained 15 Soul Energy, 162/115

And so I made the decision to, for the first time ever, actually sit down and wait for my Aura to fully regenerate. I also needed my Mana to fill up, as I had some ideas that required it. The Aura took less than an hour, about fifty minutes, to top off. My Mana however? That would take almost six hours at the rate I currently had. I ended up breaking out the MRE to have lunch.

Good old fashioned Chili and macaroni, a meal that never lets you down.

It was absolute agony to do nothing but sit around for six hours. I explored the parts of the dungeon I still had access to, hoping to find something I had missed or an enemy to kill to pass the time, but there was nothing. The stone wall still blocked my way back out. I decided that, in the future, I’d be bringing along a book or two and a handheld gaming system. I needed something to kill time with. Lesson learned, I guess.

After that torturous six hours, my Mana was finally full, and I got to work.

Level: 8

Soul Energy: 47/150

1 point assignable

Mana: Max 3 -> Max 4

Confirmed

Mana: 4/4

It did not hurt nearly as bad this time when my Manawell expanded, I’m unsure if it was because I was acclimating to the pain or if it was because I was only going up by a point. Either way, it was significantly more tolerable. With a grand total of four maximum Mana, I had far more options when it came to enchanting things later.

I pulled out and touched the barrel of my rifle, and focused.

Ability: Quick Craft activated

No suitable Quick Craft target detected.

It was worth a try, but it just confirmed what I already knew. Yet again the System refused to directly interact with stuff from Earth. I shoved it back in the pack. For now, with my limited supplies, I didn’t have much to work with besides gold.

Using that nugget as an enchanting medium for Lesser Firebolt had worked out pretty well, so I decided that I’d be making two more of them, since that would mean I could potentially kill ten enemies without wasting any of my precious ammo. Sure it was going to suck to waste another eight hundred dollars in gold, especially since the dungeon was being stingy with it, but what good is it if I don’t make it out of here alive?

Piece of gold detected. Tier 1 material, small size. Required soul energy for enchantment equals 5. Requires 1 Mana

Soul Energy 42/150

Mana: 3/4

Piece of gold has been enchanted! Would you like to name it?

Name: Fuck you Vol 2

Confirm?

Piece of gold detected. Tier 1 material, small size. Required soul energy for enchantment equals 5. Requires 1 Mana

Soul Energy 37/150

Mana: 2/4

Piece of gold has been enchanted! Would you like to name it?

Name: Fuck you Vol 3

Confirm?

I put all three of the nuggets into my left glove and migrated the mags that were there into my backpack. For my next trick, I grabbed another nugget and held it next to my ka-bar for another very expensive idea.

Ability: Quick Craft activated

Mana: 1/4

The gold slowly morphed around and enveloped the entirety of the knife’s grip and a majority of the guard. A small lanyard loop sprouted at the bottom. I held up my newly gilded knife and began to focus.

Piece of gold detected. Tier 1 material, small size. Required Soul Energy for enchantment equals 10. Requires 1 Mana

Enchant piece of gold with Limited Animation (Flight)?

Soul Energy 27/150

Mana: 0/4

Piece of gold has been enchanted! Would you like to name it?

I had only one idea for a name in mind for this ridiculous thing.

Name: Edge of Desperation

Confirm?

I had the Edge do a few test flights around the room to see how it fared vs the Blade. Even comparing it to the Dancing Blade v1, it was clumsy, but given my options it was the best thing I could think of. Since I had the time to spare, I practiced flying both of the knives around the room simultaneously. It was awkward to keep track of both at once, let alone accurately guide them, especially given the Edge’s uneven weight distribution with the enchanted portion. It was a loophole really, as I couldn’t enchant the knife itself. The driving force was just a grip after all.

I found it helped if I flew them side by side instead of having each do their own thing. Worse case scenario, I’d just keep the Edge near me for personal defense, while the Blade would be out and about on the offense.

After all that, I found myself facing two options.

One, I could go face the boss right now and see how it goes.

Two, I could wait.

If I waited, I could restore my Mana again, enchant a few more gold nuggets, and then what? I was going to run out of SE after only fire more consumables. I couldn’t exactly go and get more. It’d be another sixty or so days before anything respawned in here, and that was if they’d even respawn if I was still present! I had only brought a single day’s worth of food and water so I’d be dying of starvation in less than twenty one days, and have died of dehydration weeks before that.

I hadn’t seen a single thing that resembled food spawn down here. The rest area fountain had dried up. So what exactly would waiting get me?

I guess I could face the boss while I was emaciated and dying of thirst. Great challenge run idea right there.

Nope.

I was going to take my chances. Every hour that I waited was just delaying the inevitable. I much preferred to go down fighting.

I gathered up my things and made sure everything was where it should be. All of my rifle mags went into the backpack, along with everything else that would just weigh me down. Mobility was going to be essential if I was going to survive. I inserted the Key into the doorframe and it opened slowly, revealing the massive coliseum from before.

I heard the crowd going wild as they noticed a challenger was approaching.

I walked in and dropped my backpack in the sand as I readied my weapons. The massive doors slammed shut right behind me.

The Lord in his throne pointed that mace scepter at me, and it began.