After many trials and tribulations and of course much asinine raging, Kevin was finally about to step foot on the 10th floor of The Dungeon. As he descended the staircase, he fumed internally. He had expected treasure and phat loot, but instead all he had gotten were useless trinkets and a few vials and bottles of mana and health potions. Still, from what little he had learned about The Dungeon and its workings from the overheard chatter of the clergy, the 10th floor was the hardest and had the best loot.
“I had better get something worthwhile. If I don’t get the rewards I so rightfully deserve, I will find whatever made this pit and tear it apart.”
The stairs wound down, deeper than normal, and after what felt like an eternity Kevin had arrived at…
“The fucking hell? Where are all the freaky fish people?”
Kevin beheld what the 6 other Heroes had seen and was equally shocked.
“Greetings! Welcome to Underhome!” A guard at the gates yelled in a friendly voice.
Kevin wondered how the actual fucking hell any of this had gotten down here, and then realized his mistake.
“Oh, I see. Clever.”
“What are you muttering? Come on in and-.”
“Die, monster! [Fireball]!”
Kevin tried to conjure a flaming orb of death to lob at the thing that he was sure was a monster in disguise, but the ball of fire never materialized. Instead, all that happened was the feeling of his mana being sucked away, as if he had used the spell. And yet, despite the feeling of the spell activating, no magical projectile was fired or even materialized.
“Strike One.”
A mechanical voice echoed around Kevin and a thin tin pot appeared from nowhere and bonked him on his unprotected head before dematerializing.
“The hell?!”
The guard blew a whistle and others like him gathered together.
“That was your first warning. You have one warning left. Behave yourself down here, or we will be forced to-!”
“Go to hell!” Kevin screamed as he pulled out his Mega Pistol/ Fuck Everything Gun.
The guards formed a shield wall, or to be more precise a post Marian Reform shield wall. Their scutum-like tower shields locked together and formed a wall that not even one of Kain’s undead marksmen could penetrate.
“Hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!” the guards chanted in unison as they advanced.
“Delete!” Kevin roared as he pulled the trigger. The Mega Pistol fired, and a single guard was erased from existence.
“What the-?!”
“DELETE! DELETE! DELETE!” Kevin screamed with reckless abandon as he tried to fire again, but this time the gun did not fire. In fact, he could not even pull the trigger. The gun seemed to have jammed, but Kevin was sure that the gun was incapable of such a thing.
A siren sounded in the entire rest area and Kevin felt like something really, really dangerous was closing in on him. He didn’t know why he felt that way, but he somehow knew that he absolutely had to reach the next floor, and fast!
“Shitty little bastards! I’ll be back, you trash heaps!”
Kevin ran off around the underground town and went as fast as his legs could carry him. As he ran, he started to feel as though something, somewhere was watching him. Worse yet, he felt the ominous feeling that whatever his gut had been telling him was after him was following close behind him. He didn’t even want to turn around to check if his intuition was correct, all he could think about was getting to the next floor.
Finally reaching the stairs down to the next floor, Kevin nearly tumbled down them as he tried to outrun whatever force was after him. As he entered the stairwell, however, the feeling of being chased ceased. Kevin still did not want to try his luck and continued down the stairwell as fast as he could without falling. After all, if he tripped it would be a long, long way down.
…
Kevin arrived at the true tenth floor and beheld a sight that made his jaw drop. The scenery was so very beautiful. Kevin wasn’t one to find beauty in anything, but even he could not help but marvel at the crystal-clear water, the white sands, the magnificent marble ruins and the smell of the sea. He was so overcome by the sight and smell that he just stood there, completely dumbstruck, for a few moments.
Suddenly, the air shifted, and Kevin felt the mana in the wind move in an unorthodox way. He hit the dirt, or rather, the sand, as fast as possible and just barely avoided the same monster type that nearly killed Alice several days prior. This time, the Hero attacked by the beast called a ‘couatl’ had a way to fight back.
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“[Wind Blade]!”
Unlike in the rest area, the spell worked, and a crescent-shaped blade of air flew after the bat-like aquatic fish-reptile. The beast seemed to have noticed the near invisible and razor-sharp scythe of wind and in an excellent display of aerial acrobatics it dodged the magical strike by a hair’s breadth. As it flew off into the ruins embedded in the ceiling, Kevin cursed and spat as he got back up and went on his way.
…
The other 6 Heroes arrived at the true 10th floor and immediately went on the hunt. Kevin had very nearly cost them their ability to ever set foot in the dungeon-town of Underhome, and now they had to get him back to the surface. If Kevin thought that he could flaunt his position to get out of this bind and walk freely in Underhome, he was dead wrong. The rest area didn’t just have the human guards to protect it, it also had a special monster that only attacked those who were enemies of the town. The monster would appear from nowhere, attack without warning and then disappear into thin air after the foe was dead.
No magic or abilities worked on it, and if you ever faced it then your sole recourse was to run to the floor above or below. No one had ever tripped that particular security switch before, at least until Kevin pulled a classic Kevin move and made an enemy of everyone and everything in the only safe zone the 6 Heroes had encountered thus far.
“He can’t have gotten far. He was only about fifteen minutes ahead of us.” Alice said dejectedly.
She was upset because Kevin had, by being the dick that he was, made the whole of Underhome view the other six Heroes with suspicion. All it took was one bad egg to spoil the bunch, and Kevin had proven to be a very, very bad egg.
“Well, at least they will let us take him back up to the surface. But, if he ever sets foot in the rest area again, they will kill him.”
“Yeah,” Jesus said with audible concern, “and knowing that bastard he will try and come down here again anyways.”
“No time for idle chatter.” Kristof interjected. “We need to get to him and quick.”
…
Kevin slammed his fists against the boss door. It would not open! He had solved all the puzzles, he had gathered all the keys, he had beaten all the field bosses. What else did this fucking door want from him?
“Lemme in! Lemme iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnn!” he cried as he banged on the door again and again.
“Hey, you do know that from this floor onwards you have to challenge the boss with a party of at least five people?”
A group of dungeon divers tried to be nice and helpful, but….
“DELETE!” Kevin roared in anger as he fired his Mega Pistol and erased the very same people who had talked to the other six Heroes as they first arrived on the true tenth floor. “I didn’t ask for your fucking help!”
The only one of them he didn’t erase was a woman with dark brown skin. Instead of erasing her completely, he had just erased her clothes and her ability to resist him. She was paralyzed from the neck down, and Kevin approached with sadistic lust in his eyes.
“Fucking ****** bitch! You’re my property now!” Kevin said with a sinister grin and he dropped his trousers.
“No! Stay away, you monster! I swear to Kain and Zalga, if you come even one step closer I am going to fucking murder you and your limp-ass baby dick!”
“Me? A monster? No, you filthy dirt-colored sub-humans are the real monsters! Look at you, making me do this! Damn ****** succubus, have you fill of my superior fists!”
As Kevin approached, he heard the door to the boss room open behind him.
“Tch! I guess you just get to stay here and wait for your master for a whi-!”
The other six Heroes arrived just in time to see Kevin pulling up his britches and turn to face the opening door, at while point they figured that both they and Kevin were done for. Kevin barely had any time to brace for the impact as C’thylla rocketed from inside the boss room and punted the twisted Hero in the nads, which cause the five other male Heroes to immediately clutch their groins.
To all parties present, the impact seemed to happen in slow motion. It was like a train wreck happening before everyone’s eyes and no one had the speed, strength or will to stop it. The now quadriplegic woman cackled with delight as Kevin was sent into the air, tumbling end over end. By the time he had registered what had just happened, the absolute agony of having his balls crushed by C’thylla’s webbed foot hit him like an eighteen-wheeler carrying nothing but dry concrete bricks.
Kevin flew like a football (an American football) punted by a very talented athlete with a penchant for trick shots/kicks and went over the edge of the cliff that the boss room door was situated upon. As he fell down towards the tranquil waters below, he let out a small whining sound.
“Damn bastard! Can’t you keep your sadism inside your twisted heart for one moment?!” Pierre shouted as he brought a few tree branches out of the side of the cliff to catch the idiot.
The branches caught the falling maniac and then moved him back up to the top of the cliff. As Kevin clutched his shattered family jewels, Alice brought a health potion over to the quadriplegic woman.
“Drink this. It will help you. We had to do this for other people besides you, so we know it works.”
The woman drank the potion and a few moments later was back on her feet, having pulled an outfit out of a spare Bag of Holding that had not been erased and geared up. After which she and her steel-toed boots went to town, kicking the downed ‘leader of the Heroes’ alongside C’thylla.
“Can we just have him back? We will make sure he doesn’t come down here ever again.” Nagato asked politely. Unfortunately for the six Heroes and Kevin, neither the now furious woman or C’thylla responded and just kept beating the horse that currently wished it was dead.
“H-hey… We…”
Alice pulled the other Heroes away, one by one. She, as a woman, understood the rage that both the unnamed adventurer and the true boss of the 10th floor were experiencing. Also, this was something she felt Kevin needed to experience, and the humbling lesson that he was not the top of the food chain everywhere in the world was one Alice felt was greatly overdue.
She had been humbled in a similar, yet dissimilar way not too long ago. She had thought that her [Charm] was omnipotent and only strong minds or special trinkets prevented it. After realizing that she was helpless against the truly strong several times in a row, she came to realize that she needed other ways of making an impact. Her power was just too impotent and too weak to be truly valuable. She needed to do something else to make her mark on this world.
Now she would make just such an impact, and hopefully teach the racist, bigoted, misogynistic Klansman ass clown that was Kevin that his power was nothing compared to that of the Dark Side of The Force… I mean the truly strong. He would take his punishment helplessly and from that suffering he would emerge from this a better man.
Hopefully.
Maybe.
Possibly?
“I’ll… I’ll kill you all….”
Well, for now the beating would continue until the morale of the unnamed woman and C’thylla improved. Whether Kevin would learn anything from his current predicament was…
“You... you all will… pay…. I am… superior…. My power…. Is… Maximum….”
Yeah… No amount of corporal punishment was gonna change his mind…