Taldinann had left me in the small ominous room within the temple. The guards had untied me from the chair but locked the door.

Since I had nothing to do, I spent my prison days exercising my body. I did not dare perform magic, except mana breathing exercises and aura control. The Goddess was probably waiting for me to make a misstep and squash me flat on her holy ground.

I was all alone, except for the guard bringing in food. Dreadfully boring.

So far the goddess had not invaded my mind, to which I was thankful.

But I was still imprisoned here. For dumb abstruse reasons, I could not comprehend.

I laid down on the hard floor.

And slipped right into a dream.

I felt as if I were sliding forward until the sensation of splashing into water hit me all of a sudden. From the blackness, faint colors appeared shaping the imagery before me. I was on a beach shore.

I waded forward until I stepped on the dry ground and took a look around.

Shore sounds, a slight breeze and the light sparkling on the waves. The details almost surprised me. I was fully lucid in a dream!

I toned down my excitement not to wake up too soon and sat down to meditate.

I had read that meditating in a dream makes it ten times more effective. I was not sure of the validity of those claims but it was a fact that focusing while in a dream was way harder than normal.

Stay lucid. I reminded myself.

I remained there for some time, sitting on the sand and taking in the scenery while I maintained my awareness.

I almost expected a nightmare to come bustling in ruining everything, but no such thing happened.

「Allen: Hehe, in your face nightmare! This time I’m in control.」

I grinned smugly, standing back up.

Now then. Astral projection, or spirit walking. Whatever it’s called. It was time to experiment.

This time I tried to will myself out of my body.

Nothing happened, except me floating around.

Maybe I have to involve mana… somehow. I reasoned.

As I tried reaching for my mana to weave it into my will, I began experiencing some static noise overlapping my dream vision. Then the noise faded away.

Was I going in the right direction? That certainly did something! Or almost did.

I tried again and failed.

Let’s think this through. How should it work?

My mana body completely leaving my actual body sounded like a bad idea and perhaps even impossible, just like stopping my own heart voluntarily.

Maybe I could, like, send out a spirit drone.

It would need to be linked to my main mana body to transmit information. Or it could be wireless, but I haven’t worked out the wrinkles about interferences and stuff.

No, better to go with a wire-like connection. Or should I call it silver cord? The fabled thing supposed to link astral travelers to their actual bodies. I like it. Silver cord it is.

I caught myself getting lost in the dreamscape.

Focus!

I made another attempt using my newly devised plan.

This time it felt like I was trying to go through a spider web. No, thousands of spiderwebs. I kept pushing and the noise became more and more intense, until…

It stopped.

I was no longer in the dreamscape. It was very weird. It was like I could see 360 degrees all at once, I was completely disoriented.

Did I do it?

My mind was free from the sluggishness of the dream, I felt like I was in complete control.

Yep. I fucking did it! I spasmed around in excitement like a drunken pixie.

What I was perceiving was unlike anything I had expected. I was not seeing physically as I would with my eyes, instead, I was Seeing mana.

Mana masses like my body shone like bright blobs, I could see the magic energy circulating through the air, small insects were bright as well. The amount of detail and sharpness was astounding.

I moved through a wall, which appeared to me as a ghostly outline as if it were air. It was exhilarating. Also cool.

Ha. Rare talent my ass. Allen wins again bitches. I gloated posturing my shapeless form in the mana world.

I looked upwards, there was a huge mass of light far in the distance and beyond even bigger masses. Shifting, flowing like a sea. I wondered if the one directly over me was the Goddess. She hadn’t reacted to me leaving my body. Maybe she was asleep? Do gods even sleep?

Can’t cage the Allen. I smiled inwardly as I pushed myself beyond the temple. It wasn’t easy since it was my first time, and I was zigzagging in all wrong directions like a drunken dwarf.

I would dare anyone to go straight the first time seeing in all directions at once.

This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it

Well, what do I do now? Maybe try to say hi to the trio. They must be worried dead sick over losing such a central figure of the team. Forced to eat bad food without my reassuring adult presence.

I navigated the confusing lights of the mana landscape until I found what was supposed to be the inn. I flew up to our room and found them. By looking at them I just knew who was who. I’m not sure how exactly, but I knew.

They were sleeping.

I tried to get close and whisper to them. Hey guys! They didn’t react.

I wondered if I could cast magic like this. I made an attempt but realized I was unable to manipulate mana in any form.

I kept trying to speak, but I was only talking in my mind. I had no actual mouth or body in this form.

Damn! I just wanted to tell them I was fine. So close, yet so far.

While I was grumbling I noticed another huge mass of mana closing in from the distance, countless tendrils thrashing in the air.

What’s that? I looked curiously. It was pretty big… and it was coming closer.

I felt a shiver. That thing was heading toward me!

Uh, I guess this is enough for today.

I turned tails and began flying back toward my body, following the silver cord.

Faster!

The tendrils were getting closer!

Oh shit! Oh shit!

At that moment I wondered what would happen to me if anything bad happened while I was in this state. I didn't really want to find out so I flew as fast as I could.

As I crossed the temple boundaries I saw the tendrils hesitate.

Safe?

The big mass of light over the temple moved in that instant and clashed against the other.

I watched in amazement as the two behemoths of light whipped tendrils back and forth against each other, causing massive shifts of mana all around.

The invader didn’t seem very interested in fighting and retreated, defending itself until he disappeared in the distance.

The remaining blob of light noticed me. A sudden wave of pressure rained down on me like a cold shower. I froze up.

『FOOLISH HUMAN.』

The Goddess spoke.

Oh no. I had been caught red-handed during my magical escapade.

Bright tendrils appeared from nowhere and started enveloping me, blocking off the way to my body. I’m fucked. Came the cold realization. The huge mass of brightness was now closing in on me.

Almost scary. I should have jumped directly into my body instead of watching the show. I so wanted to slap myself.

In a few seconds, I had been entangled. I tried to free myself, to no avail. I was completely entrapped.

Eeep. I let out a puny mental squeak.

A sharp pain filled my whole being and I woke up.

「Allen: Ah… damn.」

I shot up, my heart beating fast.

I was still in the small room in the temple.

I’m still alive. I took a sigh of relief.

Had it all been a dream or did I actually suceed in astral projecting? Let's just pretend I've succedeed until proven otherwise.

Another great success for the great All–『WHAT WERE YOU TRYING TO DO?!』

A booming telepathic voice hammered down on me. I winced at the suddenness. I was proven right.

「Allen: Uh… is that you An- Goddess?」

I felt a surge of irritation being pushed on me.

『STOP ASSOCIATING MY NAME TO IMPURE THOUGHTS!』

Not my fault! I hopelessly tried not to think about her name. The more I tried the worse it got.

『CALL ME WITHOUT THE HONORIFIC THEN, JUST ALHER! ALHER!』

Alher… Well that name didn’t evoke any bad thought.

『I WAS WATCHING YOU. WEREN’T YOU TRYING TO CONTACT YOUR GOD? WHY DID YOU RUN FROM HIM?』

My god? Do you mean the Creator? I haven’t heard from it since I came into this world.

『…』

I caught a sharp feeling of impatience.

『I DOUBT THIS CREATOR IS REAL…』

Gods that don’t believe in God. The irony was reaching metaphysical levels.

『BUT NO. I’M TALKING ABOUT EXFERAS.』

Literally who? She had already asked me about that name. But nope, I was still clueless about it.

『THE ONE I DROVE AWAY. I SEE HIS TOUCH IN YOUR SOUL.』

The other huge blob of light?

Who the hell is this Exferas guy? Why don’t you gods just leave me alone? I just want to git gud at magic!

『HE’S THE GOD OF NIGHTMARES.』

God of nightmares?

Wait… could it be that…

No way… so all these shitty pathetic nightmares I’ve been having were due to some god bullying me? I knew there was something fishy about it! Back in my world I only had like two or three nightmares a year, if I was lucky.

My dreams had been sabotaged.

How did I not connect the dots? I guess my mind wasn’t exactly in top shape after having been mind ravaged.

『…』

He’s not even that good at his job, to be honest. I’ve seen worse nightmares.

『YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND HIS POWER!』

She shouted at me and I was hit by a flow of images flashing through my mind.

Fear, despair, famine, hopelessness. Images of abominations, dead people, tortured people.

I did feel a little queasy. Probably just the Goddess projecting her fears on me.

I started feeling a headache coming.

『HOW CAN YOU NOT FEEL AFRAID?』

Dunno, maybe I’m just too dumb to feel afraid? I wondered. I saw the same stuff every day on television back in my world. It gets old fast. Except for the abominations, those were only in the movies. But it’s not like they could hold a dime against a nuclear warhead.

『TELEVISION?』

Pain shot through my whole being while the Goddess investigated the concept of ‘television’. I gritted my teeth, refusing to give in to the pain.

Of course, it was different when witnessing those things in person. I had experienced it firsthand. But a fleeting image couldn’t affect me at all.

Also, the corporate environment numbed me, I guess.

I remembered the gray days at my job. Always the same day repeating forever, an easily replaceable cog in the system. Friends moved to distant cities. No energy left to do anything after the working hours. Fucking overtimes. Just emptiness to be filled by TV shows, novels, games, and dreams.

Nightmares were one of the few things that reminded me I was alive. I desperately needed to feel alive. I was too tired to even feel depressed.

『WHAT ARE YOU HIDING BEHIND THESE MEMORIES?』

Alher started forcefully digging deeper and deeper. The pain became unbearable and

all

went

white.

“Ally, wait!” Squealed the little girl with bright chestnut hair and hazel eyes while chasing me.

“No one can tag the Mighty Al!” I said, looking back and poking out my tongue.

My boasts were cut short as I tripped on an exposed rock and tumbled on the grass.

“Ow!” I said, massaging a bruised knee, my eyes a little watery.

The girl walked up close to me and stared at me with a serious face. Then she bumped my forehead with her open palm.

“More like Silly Ally!” She exclaimed breaking into a grin. “Tag, you’re it!”

It was a cute grin. Did my heart just skip a beat?

Someone smacked the nape of my neck from behind me.

“Owie!” I protested turning my head toward the culprit.

“Look where you run, Allen!” My mom reproached me. I pouted while the girl laughed merrily.

Stop.

“What do you want to do when you’re a grown-up?” The same girl, now slightly older, asked me.

“I’ll make video games!” I replied with a bright smile. “What about you?” I asked, looking into her hazel eyes.

She smiled. “I want to write fantasy stories!” She said reaching for the sky. “Adventures with dragons, fairies, and princesses!”

“Lame! Nobody reads books!” I said, grinning.

She looked at me with narrowed eyes and blew a raspberry at me. I laughed.

We were interrupted by a shout. “Who clogged the sink with dirt?!” Her mom shouted angrily, stomping footsteps drawing closer to us.

We looked at each other, panic painted all over our faces. “Uh oh…” Our little experiment gone wrong had been found out. “Run!”

We never stood a chance.

No more.

Please.

My mind dissolved into the white.