Chapter 8 B’: Heidi books in

Heidi after hastily wondering around in the village of Larnia for a bit, to see what it had to offer, which by the way according to her was not much, finally arrived at the inn.

Larnia was a small human village with a population of about 500 people, in the south borders of the Demonic Kingdom and as such, it had suffered a lot due to monsters invasions.

The villagers were happy to receive the heroes’ party and had hopes that finally the day when they would live their lives free from the constant fear of invasion that they were dealing with each day, would come.

The buildings in the village where pretty simple. Most of them had only one floor, while two to three of them had two floors.

Only the inn and the mayor’s house were somewhat different. Instead of just wood, stone was also used to build them, but other than that, there was really no artistic value to any of the buildings in this village.They were simply built to put a roof above the villagers heads.

The roads of the village where covered with dirt and became muddy after rain, as they currently were now, only to put Heidi’s mood further down the dumps. Her cute white heels where already dirty and Niki was going to kill him!

Taking a last look outside the inn before she entered, she saw that all the rooms on the 2nd and 3rd floors conveniently enough had windows with a small ledge under them, which she could sit on while in her bat form and take a peak inside.

She was not a peeping tom, she told herself, she was just following master’s orders to see if the heroes were okay!

Opening the  inn's doors, she walked in like she owned the place! After all, this so called inn, which compared to the pigsty in his old estate was far inferior (exaggerating again), should be honored to house a VIP guest like herself!

She approached the wooden counter which was several inches higher than herself, even on heels and coughed loudly to get the attention of the young woman sitting behind it.

The young woman who was probably the innkeeper had yet to acknowledge her presence though. She was around thirties, (but she wasn’t even going to ask as that could probably lead into trouble), had short bright red hair, mischievous green eyes, a slim body and small breasts.

When hearing the loud cough, the young woman was startled. She tried to find out where the sound came from, but she couldn’t see anyone. Well, that was until she heard a cute girly voice saying

“Down here!”

Upon seeing the cute chubby Lolita, with her eyeglasses and her pink frilly dress,  the young woman showed a blinding smile with her pearly white teeth. She truly loved cute little chubby kids and this one seemed just adorable!

“Well hello, young Miss! I am Erica the owner of the “Flying Donkey Inn! What are you doing here today and who might you be?”

“My name is Heidi and as you can see I am a noble’s daughter. I demand your finest room to rest and your most delicious food to eat!” Heidi declared with arrogance, puffing her flat chest proudly.

“Hmm, young Miss, I don’t mind giving you a room, but where are your parents if I may ask? Don’t tell me you are on your own here? You know that in order for a child to book a room at an inn one of the parents has to sign on the ledger right here, right?” said Erica showing her the ledger.

Heidi was perplexed. No actually she didn’t know it. How the hell was she supposed to know that something like that was required these days? Last time she was on a vacation like this (200 years ago) the only thing the innkeeper was interested in, was gold, not some parents’ signature.

What was she going to do now?

Seeing the child lost in her thoughts, the innkeeper offered her help.

“Where are your parents cutie pie? We can go to them together.”

“Crap, crap , crap! What do I do now? Run for it and sleep on the streets?”  Just as she was wondering what her options were, she heard on the back room of the inn familiar loud voices. It was the heroes’ party. She was saved! She could use those guys ….

“Beautiful onee –chan don’t worry. Papa and mama are already here. They are in the back room. I will go and get the signature right now.”

“What!” Erica asked surprised. The only ones in the back room, in the dining area were currently only the heroes. Seeing as the girl in front of her was human, she put two and two together and immediately excluded the elven hero from being her father. So the only possible answer was….

“Eric the son of Duke Philip of Allemagnia is your father? Ah, I can see the resemblance you both have blond hair! Oh my god! I can’t believe the hero has a child!”

“Oops, onee-chan I am sorry, I shouldn’t have told you that. Papa, said it was a secret and I was not supposed to tell anyone. Please, don’t tell anyone or he will be mad.” Heidi said faking tears in her eyes.

“ But of course, my precious! Don’t worry, this onee-chan knows how to keep a secret. But do tell me, I have to know!” she said anxiously

“Which one of the three ladies in the heroes’ party is your mommy? Is it the priestess Sachiko, the sorceress Moira or the swordswoman Marion?”

The child looked confused for a moment scratching her head for a bit, before the question she asked a second later caused the innkeeper’s mouth to hit the floor in astonishment.

“Hmmm, Onee-chan what do you mean three ladies? Papa has only TWO ladies in his team. Nii-chan Marion is not a girl like me, he is like Papa, a boy!”

“Omg! A trap in the heroes’ party! Wait till I tell Monica and Jessica about this!” thought the innkeeper Erica who certainly knew how to keep a secret or two…. for about 5 secs!

“But, little Heidi you didn’t tell me who is you mommy? Is it Sachiko or Moira?”

“My mommy’s name is Moira. But you have to make sure not to tell, okay? Now please give me the book, so I can get papa’s signature for you.”

With the ledger on one hand and an inkwell on the other, chubby Heidi made her way to the heroes’ table, while Erica was waiting for her on the counter near the entrance of the inn. She didn’t after all want to interrupt the joyful reunion of a man with his daughter!

“Eric, onii-chan?” Heidi said with a cute girly voice, faking a face filled with adoration aka rosy cheeks (she pinched them many times to get the right color) and sparkly black eyes as she approached the startled Eric and his group.

“What’s going on little girl? What do you want?” he said.

“I am a huge fan. You are brave, handsome and our worlds only hope for salvation. I want your autograph, sign here!”  she said pushing the book and the ink to his face, causing him to sign it immediately without even reading it! He was just so eager to get rid of the chubby Lolita who had wrapped her hands around his neck in an impromptu hug.

“Ok kid you got my autograph, now please let us continue our conversation. We, heroes, have important things to discuss. Things that a cute little girl like you will not understand.” He said arrogantly and politely dismissed her.

Only one person at the table was being skeptical while watching the whole scene and that was the priestess.

“Where have I seen this kid before? She seems familiar but I cannot quite put my finger on it!”

Having taken Eric’s signature Heidi returned to Erica. “Hm, similar names Erica and Eric. Dumb and dumber!”

“Onee-chan! Daddy gave me his signature. He also said to give me a room next to his own, as he wants to be able to come and read me my bedtime story without anyone noticing. Is that possible? Please, onee-chan?”

“Well the room next to the hero is currently occupied by another of our inns guests, but don’t worry I will move him to another, sweetie! Just wait a second here.” She said running up the stairs.

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Soon after, sounds of screaming, yelling, cursing and things breaking could be heard from one of the floors above and a semi-naked guy was seen a couple of seconds later running down the stairs with his clothes on his hands cursing furiously at the woman climbing down behind him:

“You crazy bitch! I paid for this room! I am never going to set my foot again at your inn again!”

Opening the door he just stepped outside while the innkeeper sent him off with a smile

“Thank you for your patronage sir!”

“I knew I can count on you onee-chan!” the chubby lolita said, while jumping to give Erica a hug (in the mean time also checking her ass).

“ Ne, ne , onee-chan? Papa wants me to go and buy some stuff that he said he’s going to need for his journey. Where can I buy the thing called booze? He also said that I should also buy some clothes for my little brother, we are twins, his name is Harry and he’s very cute, smart and great at spells (all true Heidi told herself). Oh he also needs some meat about 500 pounds. Do you know where I can get all these stuff?”

“The guy sends his little daughter to buy booze? He has a second child? He’s going to let her carry all this stuff by herself? What a scandal! The so called hero Eric is an insensitive jerk! Wait till he gets the bill! I am going to charge him double and everyone is going to know about him!”  Erica silently promised to herself.

“Of course I will help you, my love! Don’t you worry about a thing. Give me a couple of minutes so I can tidy up your room, When it’s ready I will give you the room so you can go to your room, and rest. I will prepare some paper for you to write down the list of things you need and I will personally go and get them for you. Where do you want them delivered? To your papa’s room?”

“No, no, no! Papa is going to get angry! He doesn’t like his room cramped with stuff. He prefers his space. He said to just put it in my room and he will get them when we are going to leave. Just make sure to put it all into his tab and he will pay it all when it’s time to leave”

“Ok, sweetie. Just bring me the list then when you get down. In the mean time, are you hungry? Would you like something to eat? I’m sure our chef can prepare for you anything you ask for.”

“ Thank you. I would like 3 steaks tartar and 3 steaks bleu to be prepared for me please. Oh and don’t forget not to put any garlic in any of my plates please. Papa said that garlic should be eaten only by plebeians. We are nobility and we shouldn’t put ourselves down to their level by eating that.”

“ The Hero is snobby as hell” Erica muttered to herself, before continuing on

“The food you ordered is a bit bloody, young miss. Wouldn’t you prefer a nice medium rare steak instead?  And 6 steaks! Are you going to be able to eat them all by yourself?”

“No” said Heidi puffing her cheaks and shaking her head “ Papa said that our family is a family of warriors and as such everyone should have an iron stomach, including me! He’s going to be watching what I eat and if he finds out I didn’t listen to him , he’s going to spank me! And I am so hungry! I haven’t eaten anything in 4 days. Look how pale I am!”

“ Ok, sweetheart I will tell the chef to prepare what you asked. Just sit down and enjoy it!”

With that Heidi smiling at herself satisfied that everything was going according to plan and that she was going to eat like a pig in a few minutes, patiently waited for her room to be ready.

Soon after, she took her key from the friendly innkeeper and made her way to her room where she sat down and wrote the list.

After completing the list which included all the booze that his master had told him to buy, as well as the few items he wanted for himself and that was the 500 pounds of meat, he checked himself just to make sure that his disguise was still in shape.

With the 500 pounds of meat he would eat like a king (more likely like a pig) at least for the next 3 months, as for preserving it, he didn’t worry, he also had the spell freeze he could use.

Hopefully, Niki’s handbag could store them all in. But even if it didn’t he could always buy a magic bag and put it on his “daddy’s” bill.

Among the various items on the list there were also a new black cloak, a black shirt and trousers, a red tie (to spice things up a bit) and a pair of black shoes. Maybe he should also get one of those top hats he thought, but quickly dismissed the idea as it would mess his cowlick hairlook and he didn’t want to leave his daddy completely broke..

Finishing the list she went downstairs to give it to Erica.

“Erica, onee-chan I am done! Is my food ready? I am so hungry!”

Taking the list from Heidi’s chubby little hands. She took a quick look to it before saying :

“These things will take a couple of days to be prepared, well your daddy told me that he and his party were going to depart in 4 days…. But don’t worry sweetie I will have them all ready and delivered to your room the day after tomorrow. About the clothes though for your brother, I don’t know his size so I don’t know what to buy”

“Oh don’t worry about that. He is the same size as me, we are twins after all and the foot’s size is 36.”

“ Okay, then I will deliver the clothes in your room so you can try them on and if they don’t fit, we can alter them. Is it that satisfactory?”

“It sure is! Thank you onee-chan, you are the greatest!”

“So far, so good.” Harry Porker thought to himself.

My cover as Heidi, Eric’s and Moira’s daughter is solid! I have found out their time of departure will be 4 days from now.

I have found out that they are all in good health and they are ok, though still pissed off that they lost so easily to Master.

The only bad thing so far in this situation, is that the priestess Sachiko, was looking at me suspiciously while I was eating. Did she recognize me? Nah, I don’t think so!

Did she mind my table manners? (she ate like a pig all 6 steaks, patting her belly at the end of her meal and giving a loud burp).

Nah, my table manners are flawless! After all, all the nobles of my time even gave me congratulations about them!

But of course! Why didn’t I think about it?  The poor girl was mesmerized by my greatness! I ooze nobility and my sense of fashion is supreme! Of course she was eyeing me, trying to figure out my style and imitate it! The poor girl!

I would even pity her if not for the thing she said to the hero in a whisper (of course I would hear it, bats after all have great hearing abilities) and that is, that she was going to buy all books she could find on this village on demonic language in order to improve her understanding of it, so that she could translate the next time they met my master.

She even told them that I lied “Tsk” I clicked my tongue in disapproval upon hearing that “ And here I was hoping for a rerun!”

“Well I have lots of time till my 2 days are up and I have to go.”  

Heidi decided to leave as soon she got her stuff. She didn’t worry about the cost, since her “daddy” was going to pay it.

But first, she was going to find out tonight what the relationships were between the members in the heroes’ party. She couldn’t help but notice that “mommy” Moira while sitting on the table, was getting a little frisky with “daddy” Eric sitting on her left as well as with the elven archer sitting on her right.

To be specific, her left hand was rubbing suggestively Eric’s thigh under the table while he was talking to her about their shop trip tomorrow, while at the same time her right hand was grabbing the elf’s crotch!

Oh someone is going to get busy tonight!