X didn’t talk much with his fellow captive creatures, nor did they with him. His exhaustion pulled his mind down into an endless abyss while he tried to rest. Despite his captors keeping quiet, the elf heard from his fellow prisoners that they were traveling towards Kargraz, a human town in the region.

I’ve heard this name before... somewhere.

[I see the sun has burned your remaining neurons.]

The specter stood up in the middle of the carriage, looking back at the traveled road.

X turned his head and gazed at the road too. “You lost something back there? What are you looking at?” The redheaded elf questioned his hallucination, seeing only dust clouds rising between trees and a scorching star.

The other captives glanced at the elf, thinking he addressed them.

[The road traveled,] replied the mirage.

“No kidding. I think the sun’s screwing with your head too,” retorted X.

A dark green-haired gnome stared at X and chimed in, “The sun’s fucked your head up, alright!”

“Shit’s fucked up, mate, I’m telling you, we’re the only sane ones among this bunch of demented unfortunates... Too many to count, too bottom of the barrel to care,” added a female gnome sitting right next to the dark green-haired gnome, spitting after finishing her introduction.

“Say it again, and I’ll fuck you up, gnome!” a half-orc took offense.

These two gnomes had been loaded into the carriage from an outpost the humans had stopped by earlier.

“Nah, you’re too ugly. Oh no, this pretty ass is reserved for proud, gallant, prime examples of our race. It’s not for sub-races like yours!” replied the female gnome.

The tired prisoners broke into laughter, their weary expressions momentarily lifted.

“A gnome? Telling us she’s better!?” The aggravated half-orc attempted to kick her feet, but his reach fell short. Chains in their feet and hands made movement difficult.

“Don’t fight, my children, unless you indeed are... inferior,” interjected X, his burnt-out mind having nothing better to expend its remaining energy on than provoking these creatures.

“You half-assed elf and your arrogant nature! Screw you!” spat the dwarf seated opposite to him.

“Woof! At least elves bark bark something to be arrogant for, unlike woof gnomes!” exclaimed the dogoon feralis.

“You still barking, feralis? No one cares what a small-brained race like yours got to growl about. I don’t think you diminished-skull fucks can even comprehend advanced concepts like this one: if you’ve got some rabis to share, go share it with your whore of a mother!” The female gnome injected pure, undistilled venom into her words.

A ruckus began to stir in the last carriage of the caravan.

“Shut up, putrajados! Or we’ll shut your mouths forever. No one will care if some of you don’t arrive in one piece!” shouted a guard on horseback as he closed in on the brewing trouble.

Silence fell.

Another human rode up from the opposite side. “And what are you putrajados talking about when you’re nothing but the same garbage?” he mocked.

“I believe they’re discussing who can rise to the top of a shit-pile and be crowned king, Captain,” jested one of the soldiers riding alongside, and all the humans around the carriage chortled.

“Captain!” shouted a voice from the front of the caravan. “Regy’s settlement is in sight.”

“Finally!”

The caravan arrived at a military settlement where the humans unloaded cargo and some of the captives.

“Are they going to let us eat something here?” X asked aloud to anyone who cared to listen.

“Hah... We won’t eat anything until Kargraz. These humans think we can subsist on air,” a sombre-looking dwarf delivered the bad news.

“I don’t know about that, but some of you sorry bastards are starting to look real tasty. Not you, elf. You look diseased and plagued,” sneered the half-orc, revealing its small tusks.

“Eh?” X lifted his head.

“You’re not plagued, are you? One of those nasty vexes your asshole cousins, the dark elves, love putting on us simple folks,” inquired an old, half-brakan.

“Dark elves? Nah, it’s the freaking vawykins and their repulsive lifestyle. I can’t stand being in one of their so-called nests. More like garbage dumps!” a third hidden gnome chimed in.

“Whoever is spreading their love, it better not be you, elf,” spoke the half-brakan. Everyone turned their attention to the redheaded elf. These beings took their plagues seriously.

“Of course not! Who do you think I am?!” exclaimed X.

Nervous laughter broke the tension.

“I’m only cursed,” he added.

The laughter ceased abruptly.

“Is that a joke?” The half-brakan stared at the redheaded elf with seriousness in his eyes. Most other sentient creatures did the same.

“Uh.... yeah, just a joke!” swfitly replied X.

Relaxed laughter followed.

“Phew... You’d better be joking. Curses... now that’s some serious shit!” spoke the dwarf.

“At least plagues and diseases can be cured, but curses? Oh no, you’re fucked forever. Bad luck follows anyone near a cursed bastard,” stated the hlaf-brakan.

“Empire shattering!”

“May the exalted Gods protect us!”

“Woof, awwooo!”

“... cleanse me oh Great One... I’m in your hands now and forever....”

X observed many of his fellow captives creatures praying to the gods, making signs of devotion on their behalf.

“You, elf,” X turned his head. “Here, catch this.” The dark green-haired gnome tossed him a piece of bread. “Consider it my treat for making all these weak-asses tremble.”

“These puny sub-races, fearing curses. What are all of you even playing at? ‘Cause it’s not life,” added his female gnome companion. “Only cowards care about curses! Boohoo, protect us gods! We’re pissing ourselves! Pathetic.”

“Oh arffy? Woof at this gnome here, barking in his pants!” The feralis pointed to his left, indicating a cowering gnome.

“I see nothing,” exclaimed the female gnome.

“Here, woof!”

“No, there’s no gnome over there.” She continued. “Our race never gets sick, and we live without fear. We advance without doubts, and soon enough, we’ll have all of you well-behaved under our benevolent rule.”

Laughter erupted from the crowd.

“You truly believe the nonsense you spout!” shouted a half-ferkl, half-who-knows-what, resembling a being from an abyss too monstrous to even describe.

“No pity for the lower races,” the two gnomes snubbed their skeptics.

X paid no mind to their conversation, as he remained too busy eating his piece of bread before someone stole it from him. Several minutes after dusk, soldiers returned to the caravan, reloading it again before mounting their horses. A human civilian approached them from the nearby tavern.

“Ital’yaki, there’s space left on the last carriage if you don’t mind riding with the putrajados,” a soldier spoke to the civilian.

“I don’t mind. It’s a good opportunity to get to know... these ones,” said Ital’yaki, a young man, his jet-straight black hair kept in a mushroom haircut.

“I fail to understand what you’re so eager to learn from such lowly beings, but go on. We’re leaving now,” spoke the soldier.

Ital’yaki approached the most unruly carriage at the far back. Every putrajado there looked at the scrawny human, not with disgust, but with indifference.

“Hi everyone... I’ll be traveling with all of you,” said Ital’yaki.

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No one responded.

“Okay...” He climbed on board and attempted to find a seat, but the captives shifted together, closing the gaps.

“I’ll just stand. No problem.” Ital’yaki smiled at the nearest soldier, who then yelled to the captain that everything was ready at the back.

“Let’s go!” ordered the captain.

The caravan resumed its journey, once again on the road toward their final destination, a human city where the captives would be sold as slaves.

The young man discreetly covered his nose as the creatures released unrecognizable, pungent odors.

“Oh, woofrry for not ruff clean, Your Majesty. But, arff arff, the last inn we stayed at didn’t include baths,” barked the dogoon feralis.

The captives burst into laughter, and the young man blushed with embarrassment.

“Speak for yourself, you diminished-skull fuck. We did bathe ourselves. In fact, we did it yesterday,” spoke the noisy female gnome. “We always have to look our best. Superior beings have the burden to set an example for you all... malformed fucks.”

“Say that again!” retorted the half-orc.

“Quiet down, my fellow... whatever you all are. We have a guest here with us, and we can’t show him inhospitality, can we?” spoke, X glancing at the gnomes. “Superior beings wouldn't, would they?”

“Damn right, elf,” replied the dark-haired male gnome. “What’s your name, human?” asked the gnome.

“Ital’yaki. And yours?” Ital’yaki hesitated, unsure whether to bow or extend his hand. He ended doing both.

“Well met, Italika.” The gnome gargled and then spat on Ital’yaki’s extended hand. “Who the fuck told you I wanted to shake your dirty hand? Hey, elf! Is this hospitable enough?”

X cracked up along with everyone else, but quickly regained his composure.

“Allow me to educate the uncultured masses.” The redheaded elf turned to Ital’yaki. “Don’t worry, young one, it’s just banter, their way of making you feel welcome in their own... peculiar cultures.”

“It is?” genuinely asked a puzzled creature.

“Irrelevant.” X faced Ital’yaki, observing every detail and mannerism. “I’m X, and you said Ital’yaki, right?”

The young human offered a slight bow, while still cleaning his right hand with his clothes. “Well met, Ekk’s. And I don’t worry about earlier, I’m unfazed. I’ve seen worst on my way here.”

“Sure you have... You don’t look like you’re from around here. I’ve seen humans in these parts, and... no, you’re quite different,” remarked the redheaded elf.

“He is?” asked the shy gnome.

“They all look the same to us,” said the half-orc.

“You have sharp eyes, Ekk’s. Humans notice quickly, but... non-humans, they don’t,” stated Ital’yaki.

“Hmm... don’t they.” X wondered aloud.

“And... it doesn’t matter where I’m from anyway,” said Ital’yaki.

“It can’t be that bad, right, bastards?” the female gnome chimed in.

“You wouldn’t believe it even if I told you. But these lands... I’m loving it here,” spoke Ital’yaki.

“Come on, don’t be shy,” the half-orc encouraged him. “Make our trip less boring.”

“It’s not like you’re in a court before a judge being tried... Ugh, don’t remind me. These fellows do not care, and to be honest, neither do I. For all I know, you could be a descendant of the demon-gods, and it wouldn’t matter. It’s just talk,” X reassured him.

“Ah... when you put it that way... It’s nothing grand. I’m from far away, another land, completely different... It’s actually amazing if you think about it, that it works this way,” spoke Ital’yaki.

“Huh...? What works?” asked X.

“Life! One moment you’re in one place, and then in another... The Gods can be scary, but they are merciful,” replied the young human.

The creatures expressed their approval, interjecting prayers and nods of agreement.

“Gods be praised,” exclaimed one of them.

“Indeed... human,” said another.

“Hmmm...” X noticed the expression on everyone’s face whenever the gods were mentioned. He focused his gaze on Ital’yaki’s dark eyes. “Filler words that still don’t answer my question. Whatever. Ital’yaki, you’re welcomed into our fold.” He turned around. “See, this is hospitality.”

“Mine was better!” shouted the green-haired gnome.

“Don’t get too friendly with the putrajados. They’ll tear your throat if you let your guard down. They’re only good for one thing: slavery,” a riding soldier warned Ital’yaki before speeding off.

“Slaves...It’s amazing, isn’t it? Humans can buy slaves here! Wow, just imagine...” Ital’yaki’s excitement momentarily caused him to forget where he stood. Every face turned to him, deadly serious. “I mean, it’s terrible. Where I’m from there’s no slavery, so I’m...ah...” He shut up.

“No slavery? And where does this fairyland of yours exist?” The dwarf next to X had many questions about this promised land.

“Please do invite us to diner sometime, sir,” interjected the cowardly gnome with a serious face.

“Invite your sister first!” The half-orc bullied him.

Another round of laughter erupted in the last carriage.

“It does seem incredible, the place you come from,” commented X.

“It is! And you wouldn't believe it, but here... it’s different. I can start anew,” said Ital’yaki.

“Oh! Now he’s talking, my deformed lessers!” exclaimed the redheaded elf.

“Lesser your mother!”

“You don’t understand. He’s like us, simple folk who don’t fit into society.” X scanned the faces around him, seeing curiosity light up in some. “Young man, you’ve landed among the right crowd. We, too, are searching of new beginnings, a different way of life. This, we understand.”

“Hell yeah!”

“Keep it up!”

“Till death takes us!”

The crowd smiled and shouted in approval of X’s words.

“See, in the end, we’re not so different. There’s only humanity in between us.” X stared at the young man.

“Hey, you weird-ass looking human,” the green-haired male gnome spat while talking. “What are you doing in these parts? ‘Cause besides these boring woods passing by, there’s nothing to do out here. And I don’t fancy you as the bandit type.”

“I’m on my way to Saint Jaulea. I’m just hitching a ride. I’ve heard it’s a beautiful human town with the largest adventurer guild in the region,” replied Ital’yaki.

“It ain’t pretty no more, not after what happened,” remarked the half-brakan.

“Fucking slave rebellion,” added the half-orc.

“Yeah, those kinn’hayas should’ve killed everyone there!” exclaimed the dwarf.

“Shh, the guards might hear you,” warned the cowardly gnome.

“I would kill to have been there, damn it!” exclaimed the half-orc.

“Woof can bark it too, kinn’hayas!” yelled the dogoon feralis.

Chants and shouts extended for a while longer but abruptly quieted down when a soldier rode nearby.

“And what does a human bastard like yourself want with the Adventurer’s Guild?” asked the female gnome.

“I need experience, so I’m looking for some adventure,” Ital’yaki began explaining. “I was advised to go to Saint Jaulea and join the Adventurers’ Guild there, gain some ranks, maybe even rise to the rank of platinum adventurer, and then I’ll be set.”

“Set for what?” X became curious about Ital’yaki’s grand plan. Dusk was fading, and the last rays of sunlight painted the final stretch of their journey in red.

“Life in the human kingdom,” replied Ital’yaki. “I’m going to get an adventurer’s passport, and if my rank is high enough, I’ll obtain citizenship... and then I’ll see.”

“Humans can do that?” asked the cowardly gnome, surprised.

“Yes, it seems so. I’ll just need to go through the process and slay enough monsters,” answered Ital’yaki.

“But you’ll need to kill scores of high-level monsters, shit! You must be out of your mind,” remarked the half-orc.

“With a strong enough party and, well... I have my skills.” Ital’yaki giggled to himself. “I think I can manage.”

“Yeah, this human’s outta his fucking mind,” retorted the half-orc.

X remained silent, standing up and gazing ahead at the road. Kargraz shimmered on the horizon, and he saw a bridge approaching.

“What’s the process for what you want to do? Signing up with the Adventurers’ Guild?” asked the redheaded elf with his back towards Ital’yaki.

“Oh, it’s easy. I’ll pay a tax, and then they’ll give me my official card with basic information for identification purposes. After that, I can take quests based on my rank. It’s like having a job. One can make a living this way. Thanks to the Gods of this world,” stated the young man.

The sentient creatures listened in amazement, discovering a part of human society that many of them didn’t know about. X, however, remained unmoved.

“You know, I think the gnome was right,” said the redheaded elf, staring at the dark green-haired one. “You freaks do have a sixth sense.”

“Of course, we superior—” the gnome began to say when he was interrupted by X.

“And you, now I know why I didn’t trust you from the moment I met you. You’ve told us nothing but freaking lies, except for the last part, which I believe. And it’s not like I care—I lie all the time too. We all do.” X turned around to face Ital’yaki. “You claim to have left your amazing land, the one that’s supposedly much better and different—the one we couldn’t give a crap about—to come and live in this wretched, disease-ridden, sick land? I don’t buy it, and you know why? You mentioned gods, and there goes your fantasy. If you had said demon-gods, well... I might have believed you right away. So, what is it? Fear of tied up slaves? Shame? Guilt? Or you’ve drunk everyone’s propaganda and think you’re actually superior? Get a better script next time. I don’t think it’ll work on the folks here, or who knows, maybe it will. But Italika—”

“It’s Ital’yaki,” interjected the human.

X stared at Ital’yaki and smiled. “Ehh...” his smiled widened. “I’m good, aren’t I? You believed me! You were all serious and blushing, avoiding my gaze. It’s just banter. It’s in our cultures, in our blood.”

A couple giggles broke the awkward silence.

“You’re alright, human!” said the cowardly gnome.

“Oh, look, it’s the Felpein River. The rapids here are fun,” remarked the dwarf.

“A quick death, you mean,” commented the half-orc.

“How quick are we talking about?” inquired the half-brakan.

“That’s the spirit!” exclaimed X.

“Kargraz is here!” several creatures chanted in unison, their fate inched closer.

Both the captives and the soldiers regained their energy. Several of the prisoners looked upwards, their broken prayers for mercy and swift deliverance mixed with others’ expletives against their ruined fates.

X fixed his gaze on the scrawny human before him. “Just one thing, Ital’yaki. Let me get this straight,” he spoke to the young man as the background murmur quieted down. “You’ve just arrived in these lands... where the refuse of the demon-gods mingles and reproduces freely, without consequences. And you’re telling me you can’t help but be in awe of this place?”

“Yes!” replied Ital’yaki.

“And the first thing you want to do is pay taxes and hand over all your information?”

“Yes...”

“To authority?”

“Isn’t it exciting?! exclaimed Ital’yaki. “But you make it sound like it’s the wrong thing to do...”

“Tell him, gnome.” X looked to the dark green-haired gnome, attentive to their conversation.

“Is your brain as flat as your face?! The fuck are you doing human!? Are all of you brain-dead or something?!” shouted the gnome.

“A toast to our demon-gods in their mighty hell! Fuck this shit!” X mumbled his next words. ”Hoooly rabbleee!” As pain hit him. But it didn’t matter anymore. He had lost all motivation to continue engaging the truly deranged being before him. Neither the dryad, nor those in Saint Jaulea, nor the putrajados around him, nor even the demon-gods themselves could elicit such a knee-jerk reaction of pure, unchained contempt within him. He dropped, back first, into the river as they crossed the bridge.