Van was feeling down… no… that wasn’t right… perhaps low in spirits… no not that either… despondent… Yes, that was the word he was looking for, despondent… maybe…?
Either way… Van had a lot of things on his mind. It seems that lately, things have been happening in repeat. Another sex session with his wife, Agnès, and a few other girls, followed by ranking up insects and fairies, then finishing off with some chores at the end of the day…
And when it came down to his days off… Luna didn’t want to go with him into the forest, saying that she wanted to go her own way, to do her own things, and find herself in her freedom… whatever that means…
All and all he was feeling a bit lost. He had changed so much, and much of it for the better. But now he felt for some reason he was back to square one. A different person… but the same problem…
He was too nice to discourage Luna from embracing her new self. And if he had to be honest, what exactly was he supposed to take charge of? Everything was going smoothly and efficiently, nothing to complain about… right?
Well… perhaps that wasn’t entirely true… for while Van was far more willing to have sex and be open about his own wants and desires… he now felt like he lost control of his life all over again…
Because when he wasn’t ranking up fairies or doing chores to help around the fort, he was breeding his troops and making sure they were satisfied. In the end… he was the breeding stud he was meant to grow up to be… something he wanted no part of when he was young, and yet now that he has accepted his own personal and mental growth… he has come to find that he has become what he didn’t want to be…
So what was he supposed to do?
Van sighed as he went through the motions of today. Fucking. Ranking. Chores. And maybe some more fucking… in all honesty, he was beginning to grow tired of it. Even with the three days off, he still didn’t feel like he had time to pursue his own hobbies or desires since he spent it helping Gwen learn magic.
Though that job might slowly be taken over by Agnès.
“S-s-something the matter, master?” Anna suddenly asked from beside him with concern in her voice from looking at his lonely expression.
Van almost jumped. And turned to look at Anna who was waiting patiently for him. He had not heard her approach, probably too busy lost in his own thoughts, but not only that, Anna has been a bit scarce these past few weeks. Probably because she felt useless at not being able to do her duties like she should be.
Even after so much time has passed, and her condition improving, there were still signs of what happened that horrible day in her speech patterns… less so than before… but still there.
And as Van looked at her, he couldn’t help but feel like she was smaller than before… though that was probably due to his own perception rather than actual fact. He had grown so much… become so much stronger… and she… she was regulated to just doing the odd job here or there… a far cry from the lofty position she used to have as Van’s personal maid…
Now that he thought about it… it was almost like she had been forgotten by everyone…
So when he turned to say something noncommittal like he was fine or it was okay, he looked her in the eyes and found… an even deeper loneliness than his own… like the two bright suns that made up the light of her eyes, that shined with willpower and confidence… were over-cast by deep black clouds, with what's left being sucked in by two black holes… yet… she still showed worry and concern for him...
And that… broke his heart…
For those were the eyes of someone who had truly given up on hope…
And he… he was the one that helped bring her to this state…
“Anna…” he said her name softly, letting the wind take it away. His own eyes responded in sympathy to her melancholic ones. He didn’t even think it. He simply pulled her into a hug and whispered how much he loved her and meant to him gently into her ears…
The two then stayed like that for a long time… and after that… Van felt like he should talk to the group of Anna’s and give them some attention. Maybe even… come out with his own feelings and problems that he has been having… for perhaps… they could lean on each other… like they used to… and they can both find some measure of peace…
The two then made their way to Anna’s tent, where the rest of her was staying.
When he entered the tent, he saw another heartbreaking sight. Four Anna’s were being looked after by one Anna. Meaning that out of the eight leftover from the fight, only three were able to move out and about. “How could I let it continue on like this?”
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Anna saw the look on Van’s face and did her best to soothe any worries that Van might have. “ Do not worry master, our condition has improved greatly since that day. It will be only a matter of time before we fully heal and can go back to serving you like before!”
Van couldn’t help but notice that the way she said it was like an old codger looking back on the good old days, hopeful that they would return sometime in the future if one was just patient enough. It was clear that despite still trying to smooth over his worries about her condition, that it was more for herself than him, even if she didn’t realize it…
After giving a glance to that Anna, he turned to soak in the miserable sight of the rest of them. “I’m sorry Anna… here I was worrying about my problems… and yet here you are… still trying to do your best to serve despite everything…”
He shook his head. “I’m nothing but a spoiled brat at the end of the day…” a defeated tone in his voice. “In the end… I'm weak… and a failure of a leader and a male…” he sighed. “I couldn’t protect you… couldn’t protect anyone… and-”
“Don’t say that!” Anna snapped, catching Van off guard with how hard her own voice was as she stared him down angrily. “If anyone should be apologizing it should be us!” she yelled at him with tears in her eyes. “We literally exist to serve and protect you! But look at us! Not only did we fail twice at that! Allowing you to be raped twice! But we can’t even really serve you anymore like we used to! Like we should!” she then collapsed onto her knees.
“What the hells are we supposed to do now? Even if you get access to your soul realm back… will it ever be the same? Will we be able to serve you like we should? Like we used to? Should failures like us even be allowed to try? Were such failures that you don’t even give us orders anymore! So what the hells is our purpose now!” she asked of him, now looking up with upturned and desperate tear-stained eyes. How easy would it be to break that last lingering flicker of hope left in them if Van said the wrong thing…
And he noticed this… and again, he felt his heartbreak a little further. Felt lost on what to say… What could he say after all? Sorry for not paying enough attention to you for the past few weeks? Sorry for not even including you in the orgy while you worked on my behalf despite everything? Sorry for being such a failure of a leader that I didn’t notice I failed to take care of you like I should have? Here he was complaining about being turned into nothing but a breeding stud… being a failure of a leader… and yet he hasn’t given Anna the attention she deserves… someone who really needed his love and leadership...
At that moment… he felt lost… but it was also at that moment… he felt the deepest connection with her yet… and understood that she to, was going through some of the same things as he...
Perhaps he was drunk on the melancholy, or perhaps he just knew instinctively what to do. But he also gently got onto his knees and drew her into a loving embrace, hugging her tightly to him, and whispered into her ears.
“You are not a failure… and I’m sorry for not paying attention to you… I love you so much… I don’t want you to ever say you are a failure again… because if you do… that makes me feel like an even worse failure… for failing you…” he then moved to look her in the eyes. “Do you understand?”
Anna didn’t look like she entirely agreed, but nodded solemnly anyway.
They stared into each other's eyes, Van slowly reached out his hand to cup her cheek, and she slowly did the same. Van wondered how he could ever forget how beautiful Anna was… and with that, they kissed. A surprisingly heated and needy kiss, that saw them grabbing each other's body and removing each other's clothing as their desires flared and their bodies grew hot.
---sex scene!---
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After another half hour of rest, Van and a few Anna’s help, the rest of the other Anna’s back onto their beds. Whatever energy they recovered these past few weeks, spent with the sex session they just had. Not that they would complain about that…
Though if Van had to be honest, they actually looked healthier than they did before. Perhaps another perk of being an incubus, or maybe their little bonding session helped strengthen the actual bonds they had, healing Anna on a more spiritual level. Either way, he was happy that she now finally seemed content.
After a moment of watching them, he addressed the Anna standing next to him. “Sorry Anna… I was so busy with things… and I had changed so much… that I completely forgot about you…” then thought about it and shook his head. “No… not forgot about you… I took you for granted to the point I didn’t even bother to make sure you were okay… sorry…” bringing her in with a side hug and gently leaning on her and her him.
“It’s not your fault,” she said, enjoying the hug. “If I was better…”
“You're perfect.” he interrupted, stopping her from going down another dark path of negative thoughts and emotions. “It is I who should be better. I may have grown in power, and have accepted some of my desires and aspects of this new life… but that doesn’t mean I have grown in maturity… not truly anyway… “
He then looked wistfully at the distance. “Now that I think about it… Luna is acting like how I used to be… trying to do things on her own, to prove she can be independent… that she can be strong…”
“But you…” he now looked back at Anna. “you were always strong… you always knew what you were going to do in life. What your purpose was and how to achieve the goals you set out… that’s why I know for a fact… that this… this is only a minor setback. You will be stronger, and no matter what… you will always be by my side… I promise you…”
Anna blushed, she then leaned forward to give him a kiss to which Van gladly accepted. The kiss continued, until Van couldn’t help himself anymore and bent her over and took her from behind, moving the skirt and some of the clothes they put on out of the way. The chorus of moans from the other Anna’s still in bed was both music to his ears… and a little funny admittedly…
After that quickie, the two shared a good laugh, something that has been hard for the both of them to do these past few weeks.
“You know…” Van said after they were done, this time for sure… “I heard from Alecto that she was going to bring a friend over that might help us with the soul realm problem. And even Ren says that the day that my soul realm being fixed is fast approaching. So it won’t be long now till everything is back to normal… so please… hold on till then… I really need you…” he said in a loving manner.
Anna smiled and held his hands. “I’m not going anywhere…”
The two then had another moment, and the conversation changed to other things. And in the end of it all, Van was glad how things worked out. Feeling like his mind was a bit clearer…