The door behind the Count of Runar closed with a whisper of a sound, but even such an almost imperceptible noise slammed against my ears like a cannon shot. Only after his pronouncement of "think" did the gravity of the proposal put forth by Gabriel Mustiel truly sink in for me. It wasn't a jest or some elaborate prank. The other students appeared to be in a similar state of shock, their faces a mixture of confusion and disbelief, even Maya's.
I shook my head, dispelling the lingering shock, and surveyed the faces frozen in contemplation before suggesting:
"Shall we discuss this?"
"Pf-f-f-f..." Maya mimicked Crixus's favorite sound effect with perfect intonation, answering my question. She got up from her desk and then... "Ra-a-a-a-i-i-i-ig!" A sound beyond normal human comprehension sliced through my ears.
"A-a-a-ah?!" Christian Rizzo stammered, looking baffled at the now vacant desk where the knight girl had just been sitting.
"E-e-e-e-n-v-y!!!" Claire clapped her hands, her eyes gleaming. "I wish I could do that! Something bothering you? Awkward situation? Don't want to answer someone's question? Poof!" She clapped her hands again for emphasis. "And you've vanished! E-e-e-e-n-v-y!!!" She shook her head with an enthusiastic fervor. "I'm definitely a fan of hers now!"
"Huh?! Vanished?" Christian repeated, still bewildered. Then, it seemed like he remembered the abilities of the raigs and nodded to himself. "You mean, she's gone?" He looked around the classroom with a helpless expression, but of course, he didn't find Maya.
"Perhaps," I shrugged in response to his question.
Why did I only shrug? Because to say, "Yes, she vanished," or "Yes, she left," would be a lie. But I certainly couldn't point and yell, "No, there she is, right behind you!" While this would technically be the truth, it would also blow my cover as a raig. Maya was cunning, slipping into the Break and hiding from the view of ordinary people. She hadn't technically left the room, but remained. No. Definitely. The status of an open raig has immense advantages.
"I'll go too," Jan declared, his gaze still fixed on Maya's empty desk.
With that, the young Scandinavian stood, gave a curt nod as if bidding farewell, and, being an ordinary person, simply walked out of the room. Through the door.
"I'm..." Michael Shchegay started to say, his voice barely above a whisper, as if he were embarrassed by the sound of it. "I'd like to think alone too." He glanced around the room, looking lost, then squeaked, "Sorry," before dashing out of the room after Jan.
"Well... What a load of crap!" Christian shouted as soon as the door closed behind Michael, his palm slamming down on the table in anger. His mop of unruly jet-black hair quivered, betraying his intense irritation. He glanced at Claire and me. "Are you two going to vanish too?"
"What for?" Claire sprang to her feet.
Swiftly, she removed a lollipop from her pocket similar to ones I was familiar with. With a swift, self-assured flick of her wrist, a motion I knew was deeply ingrained in her reflexes, she unwrapped the candy. This action, I knew from experience, wasn't as easy as it appeared. Poping the candy into her mouth, she hopped onto the edge of the table.
"I don't mind talking." Her words were muffled as she rolled the lollipop around with her tongue, her gaze fixed on the ceiling. She then shifted her attention to Christian. "Start."
"What?" He appeared lost.
"Well...You wanted to talk, right?"
"Yes."
"Then talk." Her smile, with the lollipop poised in her mouth, seemed especially sardonic.
"So, I'm..." Christian seemed flustered but managed to compose himself.
I anticipated a question along the lines of: "What does everyone think about Count of Runar's proposal?" However, what he asked was entirely different.
"Sir Gabriel mentioned that you..." He gestured toward the girl, "You..." He aimed his finger at me, then made a sweeping gesture toward Maya's vacant chair. "...And Lady Maya were among the top four in the tests."
"Yeah." Claire bobbed her head in agreement, her ponytails bouncing childishly.
"I have a question. Where is the fourth person? I mean, the fourth best. Why isn't he here?"
"Are you referring to Nicholas?" The girl sought clarification, and I tensed up. Were they acquainted? "He wasn't fourth, he was first. His parents had business troubles and relocated to somewhere in Asia."
That was indeed the official explanation for Nicholas' sudden absence from university. Only three people, myself included, knew the reality of his demise.
"Did you know him?" I asked her, feigning mild interest.
"No." Her ponytails quivered. "I was just curious." She tried to maintain silence but, failing to withstand my piercing gaze, she continued. "I made inquiries about everyone who scored higher than me in the entrance exam." She leaned in towards me, her body language confrontational. "What?! Do you have a problem with that?"
"Did you discover much?" I was careful not to overact, forcing a tight smile as I asked the question.
Sometimes, I forget to behave in a manner commensurate with my apparent age, a risky oversight especially when the ever observant Maya Grimm was so close by in the Break.
"A lot... A little..." The lollipop moved from one corner of her mouth to the other. "All of it is my business."
"That's too bad. I'm curious about what you found out about me." I tilted my head to emphasize my interest.
"About you?" She leaned back, her hands bracing against the tabletop. "Izao Vaillant, son of Melanie Vaillant, a cultural specialist relatively well-known in certain circles. A fan of robots, manga, and anime. The fact that a regular high school student like you managed to get into this university is nothing short of a miracle..." She took a brief pause, removed the lollipop, and continued. "And the fact that you scored second on the tests stirred up quite a buzz." Yes, I may have overperformed on the exams, answering questions and solving problems a bit too efficiently. "A lucky freak or a genius?" The lollipop found its way back into her mouth. "I haven't decided yet."
"What can you tell me about myself?" Christian asked with curiosity.
"About you? You were ranked seventh, beneath me. I didn't bother to ask about you," Claire replied, shaking her head.
"Well, that's humbling," the dark-haired student responded, devoid of any hint of offense in his tone. He abruptly shifted the conversation, "I think I concur."
"Likewise..." Claire nodded in agreement. Once they had voiced their thoughts, the pair simultaneously turned their gazes towards me.
Their abrupt shift in the conversation took me by surprise. It seemed my old soul was still struggling to keep up with the swift leaps in thought and subject changes that were commonplace among the younger generation. I was pondering how to coax information about Maya from Claire, and here was this sudden shift.
"And what exactly do you 'concur' with?" I asked, mimicking the Count's intonation.
"What's there to ponder on?" Claire responded nonchalantly, smacking on her lollipop, "Opportunities like this don't come twice."
Upon hearing her response, I turned my gaze to Christian.
"I came to university seeking knowledge," he shrugged, "The chance to receive an education akin to that of the nobility is not something I can pass up. I definitely won't decline."
"Only, I hope you realize that the Count wasn't suggesting we become 'new wave' engineers, but rather..." Claire trailed off.
"I comprehend," Christian replied earnestly.
Kids... They believe they understand. Yes, of course... I visualized the figures of Tunk, Rock, Alir, and Ohrin - the heir's curators over different directions. Men of high status and grave responsibilities, performing tasks that many were oblivious to. Did I desire to join their ranks? I was unsure. Particularly because I was increasingly certain that Gabriel was not the Count of the Mustiel clan, but rather the Duke's youngest son - the second in line to the throne of Novilter.
Contemplating what "I want" and "I don't want," it was so childish. I didn't have the luxury to refuse. Any additional leverage might aid in averting the End. Having the backing of an influential figure could simplify many things. Yes, it could invite additional complications, but it would be worth it.
"Mm-hmm," I cleared my suddenly parched throat. The shadow of Maya, looming uncomfortably close, was unnerving and constraining. Not to mention the "Word" with its ridiculous ban on lies. "I'm not sure about you two, but I've always had a fascination with space."
"Not robots?" Christian asked, eyeing my t-shirt.
"Robots? Absolutely! Robots are a five! And robots plus space? That's an eleven![1]" I replied with a genuine smile.
"Oh..." Claire giggled, "I think I'm beginning to understand Maya Grimm's reaction!"
"Eh?" Christian didn't follow her meaning.
"You saw her banging her head on the desk, right?"
"I did."
"She started doing that when Izao walked into the classroom!" Claire's laughter echoed throughout the semi-empty room, bouncing off the walls and glass. "She must have known him before!" Wiping tears from her eyes, Claire gestured towards me, "Am I correct? You two know each other?"
"Just a bit," I answer as ambiguously as I can.
"A bit?!" The girl exclaims, her eyes nearly popping out of her skull. "'A bit,' and the Knight who's been through hell and back, battle-hardened, who's faced the most terrifying monsters in Breakthroughs, starts slamming her head against the desk the moment she sees you?! Good heavens... Izao, you have a knack for getting under people's skin! What a talent! E-e-e-e-n-v-y!"
"Envy?" I ask, perplexed.
"I always sincerely envy talented people, no matter how that talent manifests," Claire states unapologetically. "Even, as with your case, in the ability to aggravate people."
"I'm not..."
"Come on, don't be shy!" She cuts me off dismissively.
She seems to be greatly downplaying her own skills - she's definitely the one who knows how to ruffle feathers.
"Do you like her?" Claire abruptly asks, pulling a lollipop from her mouth.
"Yes." My straightforward answer takes the girl off guard. She clearly anticipated me to squirm and make excuses.
Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings.
At my simple "yes," Maya's shadow wobbles and shifts to the wall, where it starts swaying against it. Is she trying to head-butt the wall in the Break? It's probably a hilarious sight; too bad I can't see it!
"You're strange," Claire's expression shifts from amused to cautious, and she even scoots away from me slightly.
"And to me, both of you are..." Christian interjects. "Fu... Strange." He corrects himself at the last minute, holding back an obscenity. Despite this, he makes no move to stand up and leave; on the contrary, he settles comfortably into his chair, studying Claire and me closely.
"Really?" The girl seems taken aback by his words. "Well, I don't know... I suppose it's easier to see from the outside, but I think I'm normal. No, I'm definitely normal!" Nodding to herself, she pops the lollipop back in her mouth.
"One's a freak," Christian nods in my direction. "The other has an impaired sense of personal space. Ahh!" He stretches, grinning broadly. "Feels like I'm back home!"
"I don't have anything 'impaired'!" Claire protests.
"Sure... whatever you say." Christian nods at her, winking at me.
I'm definitely starting to warm up to this guy. There's something refreshingly genuine about him. He doesn't pretend to be anyone else and doesn't act according to others' expectations. However... the same could be said about Claire. And here's the question... Was the knowledge demonstrated in our tests so crucial, or did Gabriel specifically select those who can speak their minds, irrespective of the situation? It's quite plausible. Perhaps the knowledge demonstrated by the selected students was secondary, more of a minimum requirement. Beyond that requirement, character traits likely became far more important than the amount of knowledge one had to join the "Count's" personal group.
The thought brought a sense of calm over me. I've always found it easy to be around such people. If they're going to spit at you, they'll do it straight to your face, not wait until you turn your back. I hope I'm right with my assumptions. However, I had the same thought about Nicholas, and I shouldn't forget that. I definitely shouldn't.
"They're winking at each other as if I can't see it," Claire snorts, "Boys... Anyway!" She hopped off the table, and with a quick flick of her wrist, she tossed her lollipop into a trashcan halfway across the classroom – surprisingly, she hit her mark! "I've made up my mind. Christian too, but we haven't heard your answer." She pivoted smoothly, tilting her head in anticipation, her eyes fixed on me.
"Tell me about yourself, then I'll answer." She reminded me a bit of the twins, Tora and Kael. Just like with them, it seemed wise to establish boundaries as soon as possible.
"Born. Studied. Enrolled." She counted off on her fingers, paused for a moment, and then smiled. "There. I've told you. Now I'm ready to hear your answer."
Regrettably, nothing particularly clever or witty came to mind, so I responded simply, "I'll agree."
"And that's fantastic!" She thrust her hand into the air and snapped her fingers. "Let's celebrate with some cakes from the cafeteria! Hey! Guys, I am talking to you!"
"I wouldn't mind a strong coffee..." Christian rose from his seat.
As the three of us exited, Claire positioned herself between us, hooking her arms through ours.
"Oh!" She exclaimed suddenly. "I didn't bring any money! Could you two treat a pretty girl to some eclairs?" She slowed her pace, forcing us to a halt. "What do you say?"
"Well..." Christian fumbled around, patting his pockets with his free hand.
"Or am I not pretty?" She furrowed her brows, as if she was genuinely concerned about the answer.
Stepping back a bit, I gave the girl, who faintly resembled the actress who played Alisa Selezneva in "Guest from the Future[2]," an up-and-down glance. Then I nodded and answered quite sincerely, "You're pretty... Very pretty..."
"Uru-ru-ru!" Claire let out a cheer. "Eclairs, here I come!"
"I didn't say I had any money on me." I couldn't resist the urge to tease her a bit. Maybe she was right, and I just enjoy getting under people's skin?
"So, you don't have any money?" The girl's mood shifted as quickly as the weather at sea.
"I have some."
"Enough for eclairs?" She asked in a business-like tone.
"Should be, for a couple."
"Uru-ru-ru..." Claire whispered, nudging us forward. "Eclairs... Why are we still standing? Move! Come on, step lively! One, two, one, two! Christian, wake up! You wanted coffee."
I didn't return to my room until the afternoon. It might seem odd: what could an adult like me possibly have to discuss with a bunch of youngsters for two whole hours? But surprisingly, we found common ground. No, we didn't delve into Gabriel's proposition - we simply engaged in light-hearted chat about this and that. Claire tried to pry out the details about how I met Maya, but I managed to dodge her queries with laughter. Initially reserved, Christian loosened up after having some coffee and turned out to be a well-educated young man with a rather dark sense of humor. As I gathered, he was raised in the household of a renowned scientist and hence had a unique perspective on many things, quite different from mine.
Time seemed to slip away without notice as I found relaxation in our casual banter. I probably would have stayed longer, but Claire had to dash off somewhere, and so we went our separate ways.
Now, after kicking off my sneakers, I find myself just lying on my bed, gazing at the clouds that slowly float away into the distance outside my window. The enchantment of casual conversation fades, and my usual burdensome thoughts resurface.
A whole free day lies ahead, and it seems like the perfect opportunity to play, read, walk, and relax! But no, instead I'm lying in bed, lost in thought. Oh, why am I consumed again by thoughts of the impending End? Can they influence whether a disaster will occur or not? Of course not, yet I can't help but ponder. Maya's odd act is also nagging at me. Why did she run off to the Break? Was she so keen on eavesdropping on our conversation in her absence? Or was she just flustered? I just can't figure it out.
Then there's the whole fuss with the test results... Initially, this was confidential information, but first-year students, with their insatiable curiosity and extreme recklessness stemming from their lack of self-preservation instinct, coupled with the chaos that's been rampant at the university these past weeks, have managed to make it easily accessible. All you need is to know the right person to ask. I goofed when I decided to show off my problem-solving skills. Indeed, I did show off, and now, naturally, I've drawn attention to myself, ranking second among all the freshmen. Or rather, with Nicholas gone, I suppose I'm actually the first. It wouldn't be such a big deal if I were a genius who earned this spot deservedly. But no, I secured this position solely based on the knowledge from my past life. Without it, I would probably be somewhere at the bottom third of the results at best. What's truly surprising is Maya's third position. How did she manage that, considering her workload? When does she find the time to study? Besides, her results clearly exceed the school level; otherwise, she wouldn't have been able to secure such a high rank on the test.
This proposal from Gabriel... Damn! Although, the topic itself is intriguing. If it's possible to prevent the End, then I wouldn't mind devoting my life to space exploration. I'm also curious about how Projection would behave in a vacuum and zero gravity. If it retains the same properties as on Earth, then raigs would make the best space pioneers. We don't need to breathe in the Break, so the lack of air wouldn't be an issue. In case of an accident, a raig can simply shift into Projection, and if Sliding works in zero gravity, they can easily return home, even from orbit. Is it enticing? To me, it's beyond enticing. But these are such distant prospects that they're overshadowed by the immediate problems confronting me.
Still, I've made up my mind, so there's no point in wasting time on idle thoughts. As for my new classmates, I suspect everyone who received the offer will accept. Everyone except Maya - I have serious doubts about her. The girl definitely won't be able to handle the additional workload - it would break her. Sometimes I think she's made of alloyed steel, but even that has its breaking point. Plus, she didn't show any interest in the topic proposed by the "Count." Also, her reaction to my presence was rather extreme. What on earth did I do to her? A few accidental encounters? That could happen to anyone. Minor incidents like that shouldn't have provoked such a reaction. Yet they did, and I don't understand why. Her nerves are clearly more frayed than mine. Moreover, what if this is her way of amusing herself?
I genuinely like Maya and would like to help her, but so far, I've only managed to do the opposite. It's disappointing. Then again, I'm not her caretaker, and her reaction to my presence did sting a bit. Just a bit, but it still did. Since she'll likely decline Gabriel's offer, the only chance I'll get to see her in a civilian setting will be by accident. But why am I even pondering this? My head is filled with nonsense again!
I need to get in touch with Zanh Kiem. Conversations with him have a way of clearing my head. Plus, he's the only one I can talk to without having to hide anything, and that's invaluable. Also, he's a Maker and might have some advice - who knows when Enlightenment might strike him? It's bizarre: the person closest to me in the whole world is not Izao's mother, not my classmates, not the raigs who fought alongside me during the Breakthroughs, but someone I didn't even know a month ago. The burden of knowing about the impending End of Everything forges stronger bonds than any welding could.
Recognizing that my thoughts were spiraling, I hopped out of bed, slipped into my sneakers, and, grabbing a handful of pencils and a stack of blank paper, headed out. Perhaps sketching a comic would serve as a distraction and clear my mind? It's worked before.
At that moment, the area was fairly quiet. Most students were in class, and lunch break was still over an hour away. I wandered into a shaded alley and settled on a cozy bench beneath the expansive branches of an elm tree. Making myself comfortable, I took out my pencils.
Initially, nothing came to me. I'm far from a master artist, and even the basic storyboard I sketched came out remarkably clumsy. If I were to put it aside for an hour and then revisit it, I wouldn't even recall what I intended to depict with these haphazard scribbles. What was most frustrating was that despite my best efforts, the outcome was absolute rubbish.
Two botched pages were discarded without a second thought. What was I doing wrong? I remember the plot of the initial books in the Battletech series so vividly, but I just couldn't translate it into a drawing. Maybe it's all for naught, and I should simply give up - simply because it's not my forte? I wasted nearly an hour on two messed up drafts!
In the meantime, other students began to appear on the path, and the younger students were starting their lunch break. Many of them opted to skip the cafeterias and dining halls, bringing their own meals to enjoy outdoors. Previously empty benches quickly filled up with people. It wasn't just ordinary students either, but even some of the nobility seemed to enjoy dining there. A pair of shapeshifters, in the guise of military students, sat decorously a few benches away from me. Another simply spread a blanket on the grass and settled down as though at a picnic. The uniform and self-assured demeanor of these future soldiers reminded me so much of the Battletech clan warriors that my pencil seemed to take on a life of its own over the blank page.
The student who had settled down for a picnic was captured on paper as best I could manage, and I added a forty-ton clan mech beside him, surrounded by a group of busy technicians. The mech was battered and dented but not destroyed, as though it had just emerged victorious from a recent battle. No, this sketch didn't belong to the plot, but as an idea for a future cover, it seemed perfect to me. I wished I could draw better, but alas, I lacked such a talent. But, even taking into account my limited skills, the drawing was almost decent.
"Mediocrity," someone said in a completely calm and unemotional tone, very close to me.
Damn! I was so engrossed in my drawing that I lost track of my surroundings. I didn't even notice that someone had sat down on the same bench as me. That "someone" was the Japanese student I met earlier that morning. Ketsu Sugawara, sitting half a meter away from me, calmly consumed a bento from a small box. Only a barely perceptible glint of contempt in his eyes confirmed he was the one who said "mediocrity."
Despite being a mature, composed man, I nearly lost my cool. Barely suppressing the urge to lash out, I clenched my jaws, took out a blank sheet of paper, handed it along with a pencil to the Japanese student, and said:
"Criticizing, suggest," holding back the anger boiling inside, I turned to him, "and suggesting, do it. Show me how it's done."
The representative of the old Japanese family looked at me indifferently, set his bento aside, and accepted the sheet from me. Wordlessly, he retrieved a fountain pen from his breast pocket, and it glided over the snow-white surface. Three minutes later, I had forgotten my anger and frustration. With precise, confident strokes, the pen seemed to dance across the paper by itself. I never thought you could draw like that with just a pen! In less than ten minutes, a battered but unbroken forty-five-ton Blackjack[3] seemed to leap off the paper, as if it had come straight from my memory.
Upon completing the sketch, the Japanese student nonchalantly handed the paper back to me, now adorned with a drawing of a quality and skill I could never match. Resuming his bento, Ketsu Sugawara uttered three words:
"You are mediocrity."
Then he turned away from me and began watching the birds fluttering about the branches of an elm.
Bastard!
But he was right, and I held the proof of his claim in my hands, a sketch he had made in mere minutes. How did he, using only my sloppy doodles as a reference, manage to capture the beauty and power of the war machine so accurately? Well, not accurately, to be fair - he didn't draw the Blackjack, but something inspired by it. If it were an exact replica, I would have suspected him of being a reincarnate like myself. Regardless, the mech seemed so "alive"!
I wanted to crumple up the drawing and toss it in the trash, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. It was too beautiful...
"Is this a gift?" I asked, just to make sure.
Ketsu Sugawara gave an indifferent nod, and I carefully placed the drawing in my folder.
"Thank you."
The Japanese student didn't even blink in response. He silently finished his lunch, rose from the bench, and without even a simple nod of farewell, made his way toward the academic buildings.
I think I'm starting to understand Maya's reaction to Izao. If I run into this Sugawara as often as I did today, I'll soon be banging my head against the trees like her whenever he shows up.
He creeps me out!
It's so irritating!
[1] TLN: The phrase in question may be challenging to replace without losing its original meaning. In the countries of the former USSR, the educational systems often used a 5-point grading scale. Consequently, referring to something as a "five" meant it was top-notch. As for the reference to space being a "six," it's possible the speaker meant that space is even more fantastic than robots. Alternatively, space could also be a "five," but the speaker was attempting to make a statement akin to "2+2=5," something intentionally perplexing. Essentially, the speaker aimed to confuse others and succeeded. Thus, if you didn't comprehend his statement, that's perfectly fine.
[2] TLN: This is a reference to an old show, and there aren't any quality images available. Here is a compilation of scenes from the show, but please note that the actress mentioned is depicted as a middle-schooler: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYPtpwowGF4. In this film, her age and appearance align more with what the author likely intended: https://youtu.be/bdbBM_ENnHk?t=23
[3] TLN: Here is an image from the Battletech wiki, although I suspect the original drawing was much more striking: https://cfw.sarna.net/wiki/images/c/cd/Blackjack_RGilClan_v04.png