Thyssa walked into the Cavern of Yourself, mentally reciting Merryway’s warning: Don’t fight your reflection. As long as she kept that wisdom in mind, she had faith that she would not fail.
Just as with Merryway, the doors slammed shut behind her, drowning her in darkness. But she was prepared. She opened up her bag and brought out a glowing purple mass – a bioluminescent tumour from one foolish enough to hunt her. She held out the grim prize and used it to navigate the darkness. The cavern was filled with the echoing sounds of her own footsteps.
Thyssa ventured further and further into the darkness, the whole time waiting for an attack from some wraithlike creature wearing her face. She didn’t know what her reflection was doing, but she knew what she’d do, and that was lie in wait until just the right moment to strike.
But the attack never came. Her unease grew more and more until, eventually, she came across another light in the distance. The exit? Could it really be that easy? Perhaps Merryway was wrong about this part – they did, after all, get their knowledge second-hand. Or perhaps, just as she lacked a Mind’s Eye, she lacked whatever it was that let this place conjure reflections - there simply wasn’t enough human in her to reflect. She liked the first explanation better.
She pressed on towards the light, until she saw it came from the surface of a huge, ornate mirror gripping onto the cave wall. Close up, she could see the light slowly, subtly shifted in colour and intensity – now pink, now green, now bright, now a little dimmer. It reminded her of the Benevolent Heart.
Thyssa wanted nothing to do with the strange device, but it was set up blocking the only way through – the only way to get to the Goddess Fountain. She breathed deeply. She’d survived the first two trials. But those were with Merryway’s help. She steeled herself. She had Merryway’s help. Their advice. Just don’t fight the reflection, and she’d get through.
She closed her eyes, grit her teeth and walked past the mirror, each step echoing around her.
Clack…clack…clack…clackclack
Too many steps. She turned around and her blood went cold.
Just as she’d expected, she saw herself. But it was herself as a malform, hissing and shuffling towards her.
“You were expecting a pretty girl?” the malform taunted her.
Thyssa scoffed, trying to hide her fear. “I was at least expecting my actual reflection.”
“Oh, but this is your actual reflection. This is you.”
If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.
“This is an illusion. A trick of the mountain.”
“No. I am the real you. You are the illusion.”
“I won’t fight you.”
A wet, sickly laugh. “You’ve been fighting me since you took the Benevolent Heart.”
“I’ve healed myself, and I come here to be healed again.”
“You call this healing? Look at what you’ve done to your family. Your real family, not the doctor you sold out to.”
Thyssa searched for a clever answer, but she couldn’t find one. But then she realized she didn’t have to. She turned her back on her monstrous reflection and walked towards the exit.
She heard her own footsteps, but then another sound - a wet gurgling sound she knew all too well. She dropped to the ground as a jet of acid shot out, hitting rock, dissolving it.
“Did you think you could avoid yourself?”
She rolled to dodge another jet of acid, then sprang to her feet just in time to jump away from a third shot right at her feet.
“You won’t win just by dodging.”
“I don’t want to win. I want to make peace.”
“Because that’s what this place is for, right? That’s what Merryway told you?” The malform lunged for her and she leapt aside. “You knew this mountain wasn’t made for people like you. Did you really think you’d solve this like all the humans did?”
“I have faith that I can.”
“You had faith Lili wouldn’t betray you. You had faith your pack wouldn’t betray you. What do you think Merryway will do when they learn what you really are?”
“What I really am is a human. I came from humans, I take a human form, and I will die with it.”
“You certainly will,” said the malform, leaping forth maw-first. Thyssa jumped back and the malform’s teeth sank into the rock, tearing it apart like dry wood. She couldn’t keep this up forever.
“I just want to make peace,” Thyssa repeated.
“There is no peace between us, because there is no peace inside us. We’re nothing but the human’s filth.”
The malform leapt on top of Thyssa, and she fought with all her strength to keep its teeth off her. “You are wrong,” she said. “We have lives of our own. We’re more than what they say we are.”
“Then why do we hurt each other trying to better ourselves?” The malform was stronger than her. In a moment, it would finish her.
Thyssa called upon the Ogre Queen’s strength and wisdom. “If something makes us hurt each other, then I’ll break it.” She grabbed a stone beside her and threw it at the mirror with all her might.
The rock crashed against the mirror, its beautiful glowing glass smashed to pieces. Just as the malform closed its jaws on her neck, it smashed to pieces as well. Just like herself, her reflection could not exist without its device.
“Pretty words,” it said as it dissipated into shards, faded away. “Will you live by them?”
Thyssa took a single shard of the mirror to light her way out and remember herself by. She picked up the tumour and covered it with rocks. It wasn’t needed anymore, and she suddenly couldn’t stomach using parts of her kin like they were common beasts. That wasn’t Grendel Pack, that was her.
With the mirror shard to light her way, she trudged down the path out of the now-empty cavern. Her whole body felt heavy and weak, and she knew it wasn’t just exhaustion, or even the poison. With great effort, she reached reached a green pair of doors and shoved them open, closing her eyes at the bright sunlight.
“You did it!” shouted Merryway. But her excitement was short-lived. “Thyssa, are you…alright?”
Thyssa shook her head.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Thyssa looked down. “I can’t.” She sighed. “We’re nearly at the top. Let’s get to the Fountain.”