I could see nothing but darkness, as I kept hearing a beeping sound from a distance. Slowly but surely, I could feel my limbs and the constant beeping sound becoming louder and clearer. I opened my eyes again and I was confused; I wasn't feeling like before.

I felt strange and was also assaulted by  a great pain in my head like it had been split open. No, I should be dead and not in some hospital recovering.

Immediately, I noticed the beeping sound was coming from a machine which monitored my vitals, as weird wires were taped from my body to these machines.

I was laying in bed with light weight blankets and sheets, hooked up to an IV and had a fluid drainage tube inserted in my chest; it hurt to breath and move.

The room was ventilated but the air felt stale as I smelt its antiseptics, a little bitter, with undertones of the artificial fragrance contained in soaps and cleaners. Honestly I did not need anyone to tell me that I was in a hospital because that much was clear and quite reasonable, considering what just happened to me.

A young lady wearing a white uniform came into my room. I knew she was a nurse due to her obvious uniform as she checked my vitals while also doing whatever the fuck it is nurses do. I tried adjusting to a seated position but was asked not to attempt moving just yet because I was severely wounded and still too weak to move.

"Wow Tom, it's a miracle that you are alive, you must be a fighter." Exclaimed the young nurse as she kept writing on her clip board and going about her nursely business.

She had a very soothing voice which could actually help a patient relax as she spoke or maybe I was still woozy from everything that was happening. I was still observing her when I noticed that she just called me Tom, which was quite strange to me because my name was John. I nevertheless remained silent because I was still very confused and trying to get a grasp on my current condition.

I had thought to myself, ‘Maybe she just chose to call me Tom as a nickname because she doesn't know my name, as no one in this hospital would actually know my identity which would have been true but I remembered that the paramedics knew my name was John. Anyway I think I'll let it be for now as it'll just be a pain in the ass to worry about that now.’

….

[Name: Tom Hendricks

Age: 19

Condition: Stable] 

A patient who recently got involved in a terrible car accident which has claimed the life of his immediate family. He was in a car with his parents and younger sibling of which he was the sole survivor. The police are still in search of any distant family member and it’ll be a while before they find any.

His survival is quite strange because he had a few broken bones and torn flesh along with a major head injury, way more than a few bruises and internal bleeding which has been tended to through surgery.

I feel pity for him, loosing your family members in an accident of which only you came out alive could drive a person into a deep space of despair and paranoia also leaving the person traumatized, so I think it's best we don't give him the news about his family yet. But what are we going to tell him when he starts asking about them? I can’t really lie to the young lad, now can I? Sometimes I just can’t help but hate my job. 

I do find something strange; he hasn't asked about his family since he woke up. Most people would be stressing and making demands to see their family who was with them during the crash or asked about their well being, but for some reason he remains calm and haven't said a word since he regained consciousness.

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I hope he is not suffering from memory loss. Anyway we'll find out soon enough. I suspect he might be suffering from a medical condition known as Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) due to the accident.

Traumatic brain injury usually results from a violent blow or jolt to the head or body. An object that goes through brain tissue, such as a bullet or shattered piece of skull, also can cause traumatic brain injury.

…

The hospital food could compare with the hot lunch I had at my elementary school (dried out, mystery meat, etc), it's a good thing I don't have food sensitivity.

The doctor tried not to show it but I can see it in his eyes that he pities me for some reason which I do not understand, maybe he knew about my situation, but I feel he’s hiding something bigger than that from me, something I should really know.

I became a little chatty with the nurse, turns out her name was Lilian. We just had a few conversations but I think I could tell she was a good person with a kind heart… like all nurses are.

This was also where things started getting a little bit strange. I was asked by the doctor if I remembered anything from my accident and I told him I remember being chased by some goons and then getting hit by a truck but he had looked at me and said that wasn't the case.

He said I was in a car with my family during a heavy storm when my dad lost control of the car and drove off a cliff due to the slippery road as he tried avoiding some rocks which had fallen from a hill above.

‘This guy must be screwing with me right now ‘cause I wasn't in any car with no family, let alone with my mum and pops.’ I thought to myself.

He started asking questions and writing something on his clip board each time I gave an answer, even if I didn't give an answer he'll still write something on it and this really pissed me off.

After this little twisted up exercise, he came to a conclusion and diagnosed me with amnesia and a Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI for short), he told me this is an injury that affects how the brain works. But I was so sure this old geezer must be screwing with me, because I knew exactly what I was saying.

"Common old man, stop screwing with me. I haven't seen my mum in ages, I can barely even remember what she looks like. My dad and I where attacked by my uncle while I tried escaping as I was being chased by some of his lackeys and I was hit by a truck that night attempting to liberate myself from their grasp, so drop this crap old man." I shouted at the doctor, feeling a lot of frustration and getting really confused right now because nothing seems to make sense since I woke up.

Looking at the flower vase next to me I could see my reflection on it, ‘This can't be happening, this isn't real, maybe I’m still in the waiting room before proceeding to the after life,’ I muttered to myself as I noticed my hair was now a mix shade of white and black.

I asked him why my hair was white and he told me I was born that way, an hereditary feature from my father. And this was where it hit me that I must still be unconscious, because none of this makes any sense, my subconscious must be playing tricks on me.

I tried getting up and I was about going into a rampage, wanting to get out of this crazy hospital so I could get some answers but I just fell to the floor as my legs were still too weak to walk. While on the floor I tried crawling; if my legs won't work then I'll use my hands.

At this point the doctor called for help and about 2 male nurses came over, forcefully picking me up in an attempt to put me back on my bed but I struggled and kept yelling, “Get your hands off me you cunts",  but all to no avail as I was still too weak to fight back.

They gave me a mild sedative and as I slowly lost consciousness, I kept wondering what the fuck was going on?

I could feel the lights go out slowly and peacefully as I felt myself calming down which was very annoying because no one had given me any answer.

…

Tom's TBI is more severe than I expected; Psychiatric issues, including hallucinations and delusions, are certainly more common after traumatic brain injury.

The risk for new onset of psychiatric illness after a brain injury goes on for a long time and can be seen with any severity of traumatic brain injury.

Some medications can increase confusion or cause hallucination or delusions. Stimulant medications such as Ritalin, Adderall, and Amantadine all have this potential side effect. Evaluation should also be done to ensure these symptoms are not related to seizures.

I really hope this doesn't cause permanent damage to his brain, for I'd really like to help him out and assist him in finding closure over the death of his family.