Lilau stole one last look back at their camp before they left it for good. Coals of the fire lay scattered, the little smoking huts disassembled. She quenched all three pits in water. The tanning and tool rack lay bare, skeletal frames absent of any outer substance. Their appearance echoed her own resignation. This was the end of this part of her life. Regardless of how the villagers received her back, she would not return here. It had served its purpose in proving she could survive on her own. If they forced her to leave the village again, she would travel so far that she could never return, even if she wanted to.

Makotae stood in front of her, craning his head around the bulging bags lashed to the harness that weaved between his legs and over his back. His amber eyes locked onto hers as she turned back around. Ready?

She forced a smile, ignoring the growing lump of ice in the pit of her stomach, and lay a hand on his flank. “Ready.”

The sun was more than halfway down its evening arc when they set out on their journey. Once the village came into view, the moon had replaced it at the highest point in the sky.

The sight of the cluster of well-crafted huts and workstations, the musty, low-lying scent cloud of many wolves and humans wafting out of it, made her heart jump into her throat. The village may have been devoid of activity this late at night, but her mind more than made up for it with the deluge of memories she could no longer repress.

By the time the two of them stood before the door of the Elder’s long hut, her breath was coming in ragged gasps and her pulse raced faster than when the forest cat had her in its sights.

Makotae, sensing her distress, pushed his head up against her hand with a low keen. A montage of what she had shown him to gain his approval of her plan to return shifted through her panic-stricken thoughts. The effort to remind her of her own desires was not without his own coloring, with dark shades overshadowing the images that spoke of his fear and uncertainty, even as he wished to support her.

Lilau sucked in a breath and held it, willing her heart to slow its frantic pounding in her chest. She needed to do this, even if this was the last thing she ever did for the Elders. She pushed the door in and entered, Makotae hot on her heels.

Darkness descended as the door closed behind them, leaving her with the familiar impression of the night she had left. She had come full circle and in the moon she was gone, very little had changed. The walls were still lined with shelves of herbs, tinctures, and ointments. The rug that had served as her bed still lay in front of the fireplace next to Raval’s and Mara’s favorite chairs. Even Raval’s snoring reverberated throughout the place. Just for a moment, she felt transported back in time to the hurt, lonely girl she had been when she ran away.

Fuzz rubbed against her side, Makotae’s presence overlaying hers in liquid duality. Not alone. Never again.

Lilau swallowed the lump in her throat as she moved towards Raval’s bed. He was always the more emotional one and the least likely to kick her right back out because the law said so.

Makotae guided her movements, using his much better night-vision to navigate the darkness. He shared this ability with her as he let his viewpoint filter over hers. The difference between the two collided in a way her brain could not reconcile. The world wobbled and blurred.

Nausea welled up, a feeling she let bleed back into Makotae as she stumbled over nothing. Please stop.

Regret flashed in apology, the double-vision blinking out and leaving her in blessed, still dark once again. Once her stomach had stopped rolling, they continued on to her original destination, where they found Raval laid out on his back under a thin fur blanket. She looked down at him, oblivious and at peace within his dream world, and doubt bloomed.

She reached down, forcing the doubt away before it took root, and shook him. Her movements surprised Makotae away from his vigil at her side.

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Raval snorted and flailed at the assault. His eyes flew open as he sat up with a start. He squinted at her. “Who’s there? Who risks the Fokla’s wrath by disturbing an Elder?”

She tried to speak, but her throat locked up in protest.

Raval’s arm lashed out, grasping at the first thing within reach. His hand gripped the bottom of her cat-skin tunic. Before she could attempt to speak again, he pulled her off her feet toward him. She cried out as her knees hit the edge of his pallet.

Raval’s grip fell away at the sound of her voice. “Lilau?”

His voice trembled in a way she didn’t recognize, but his embrace squeezed away her thoughts on the reason. “Lilau! When you vanished, I thought the worst! Is it truly you, my girl? Or is this a dream the Fokla have allowed me?”

His familiar smell of tanned leather and moss surrounded her, the warmth of his arms bringing the sting of tears to her eyes. “It’s really me, Elder Raval. I... I wanted to see you again and... and show you my wolf.”

“Wolf?” The surprised tone was thickened by feelings that were echoed in the tears she felt soaking into her hair.

“You are Bonded?” Mara’s words cut through the fog of emotion like a knife through fat.

Lilau pulled away from Raval and stood to face Mara with what she hoped was a determined look. Mara stood in the doorway to Raval’s room, hands clasped behind her back. Mara’s expression held nothing surprising as she regarded Lilau with a look that pierced into her very soul, uninhibited by the unlit room. There was no disappointment. Just shrewd arithmetic behind her eyes as she sought to solve the riddle before her.

Makotae, who had squashed himself into a corner since Raval had woken up, shifted.

It was the tiniest of movements, but it proved more than enough to draw Mara’s raptor gaze. “Come here, pup.”

Makotae, unable to deny the authority in her tone, slunk forward as commanded, tail down in submission. Lilau held her breath, knowing full well what was coming next as Mara ran her hands across his body.

“This wolf is a runt.” She proclaimed before setting her stare back onto Lilau. “Did he come to you, or did you find him?”

Lilau’s face reddened under the scrutiny. “I... I found him, Elder Mara. He was lost and hurt....”

“And meant to die, Lilau. You abandoned the village, prevented the return of this cull’s essence and now have returned hidden in the shadows. What do you expect us to do, girl?”

I wanted to show you, she thought, fighting back tears, but she didn’t bother saying it. Facts were a stronger force in an argument against Mara, and she knew just the ones to use.

She let the sting of the reprimand flow past as she looked Mara in the eye. “The village abandoned me long ago, Elder Mara, but neither of you did. Leaving as I did was disrespectful, and I came back to make it right. As far as my wolf, what I did, I did as an outcast. Can an outcast break taboo?”

A dangerous glint flashed through Mara’s eyes, killing any further defense of her actions. Lilau dropped her gaze to the floor and awaited the inevitable punishment for her transgressions.

“Mara....” Raval spoke in a calming tone.

“No, don’t ‘Mara’ me, Raval. It’s late and I’m tired. Lilau, you may stay the night. In the morning we shall discuss things properly. Good night.”

Mara turned on her heels and disappeared back to her side of the hut.

“Don’t take her words too hard, Lilau,” Raval said, shifting the calming tone he had tried on Mara over to her. “We both know the woman prefers to drown her emotions with the rigidity of rules. Your wolf may be small, but so are you. I always found the idea of you astride one of our massive beasts to be strange. I wish I could see him half as well as she can in this darkness, but I’m sure he is a fine wolf. Rest as much as you can tonight and know that I will support you in whatever you desire.”

Raval shifted a bit on his bed. He reached out and patted her hand before laying back down.

Makotae, who still stood with his head hung low in front of the room’s entrance, let out a low whine of consternation. I don’t like it here, but I will stay for you.

Lilau put her hand on his back in an attempt to comfort them both. They walked back out into the main room, where she took her place on the thick bear rug and curled up on her side. The rug’s familiar softness solidified what she already knew deep down. As much as she wanted to leave the pain of her life in the village, she wanted to remain close to those who had raised her even more. It was selfish to ask them to take on the burden of her care again. She just hoped they would forgive her for her weakness.

Makotae’s warmth pressed against her back as he lay with his head draped over her shoulder, memories of their time spent surviving together drifting from him. Not a burden. We can take care of ourselves.

The reminder sent a shock through her. Of course! Just because she had come back didn’t mean they would have to care for her again. As long as she got to see them, she didn’t care if she had to do everything for herself and Makotae. She set her mouth in a determined line. She could, no, she would make it work.